From the Embers Ch. 01

I knew it was coming. Had I felt it, then I'd have changed the topic entirely. She grinned and squirmed her feet around in my lap. "Well, at least we know they're not killing your dick. That's what guys online are afraid of." I suddenly became aware of my raging erection. They were so rare outside of morning wood that I hadn't even noticed the chub down along my right thigh. Scuttling to cover myself, I dropped the pills, but she remained in place - staring at the TV while pinning me down on the couch. "It's fine, dude. It happens. You can deal with it afterwards - I just wanna enjoy the evening with my brother a bit more, all right? It's been forever since we talked like this."

I was used to people telling me their fucked-up problems and equally messed-up situations, but nothing like this. Having your hard-on rubbed by your sister's every move was a sensation I could've been without, but she held fast. Despite not caring, I felt dirty knowing that a few seconds before, I'd caught sight of her undies and this... might well have been the result. I attempted to calm myself by focusing on her question. If she wanted to play chicken - I'd play chicken. To up the ante and attempt to turn the heat on her, I answered: "To some people. To others it has the unfortunate side-effect of killing your libido and, lastly, you have those who can't achieve an orgasm."

She reared her head, but didn't look away from her gold miners. "Well, that sucks. I know you're not the first one, but you could still be the second or the third. Which one is it?"

She met my bluff with such ease - such lack of disgust I was nearly disgusted. "Third. Haven't cummed in six years." Her eyes shot up as she turned towards me and dropped her jaw.

"Seriously!? No wonder your sister's feet are giving you a hard-on - Jesus, man! Can you cut them out!?"

I shook my head and quickly retorted: "No need. Honestly, the way I've been living my life, I haven't been surrounded by temptation. And it's not your feet turning me on - it's a natural reaction to someone or something touching it."

She laid back on her back, scooting ever-so-slightly down on the couch and in so doing raised her dress slightly. I quickly diverted my eyes and felt her re-trace her steps for an analysis. But she didn't move to cover herself, instead, she just lay there and looked at me.

"You're being weird, Josh. You're not regretting the kiss, are you?"

I'd honestly questioned myself about that very same thing, only to come to the same conclusion. "No, not at all. It was a good idea, even if it's weird for siblings to do that. I thought maybe just a peck, but-..."

She grimaced and nodded in agreement. "Sorry. Didn't mean for it to go like that... hey, if it's any consolation, I'm wet as a water-bucket over here." I was powerless to stop it. I felt the jerk in my pants as soon as I pictured the creamy pussy beneath her blonde undies. "Sarah! We shouldn't be talking... I mean... we're-" She waved dismissively at me, still wielding her devilish smile.

"It's fine, dude. It happens. Physical reactions and all that. But as my personal health care provider, you need to keep talking to me about the boner-problems." I rolled my eyes. The conversation was light-hearted and tinged in humor, but something about it didn't feel entirely right. Maybe this was supposed to be how a brother and sister spoke? Maybe I'd just been shielding her too much by keeping everything to himself? After all, if I'd ask her anything, I was sure she'd answer in full - disgusting details and all. "It works just fine. It just doesn't... fire. It's not an uncommon problem - really."

"You're telling me that even if you get really worked up, soldier-boy isn't gonna turn off the safety?" She sounded genuinely interested - it was the first time she'd ever been fascinated by anything medical.

"Yupp. Not even a drop."

She jerked her feet around in my lap and the painful touch of pants against glans made me wince. "I still think you can. We just need to find you the right girl - preferably one that won't break when you release six years' worth of cum in her."

I was beyond uncomfortable, which she seemed to enjoy to no ends. I was battling a new war - a struggle of reason against nature, as she dragged her feet up and down my thin pants and said words I'd never thought I'd hear from my sister. The dissonance was astounding, nearly enough to knock me off the sofa, but I couldn't bring myself to rise up and reveal my pole. I laughed back at her: "As funny as this is, Sarah, I doubt you'll be able to bring me out of my six year rut with feet. I'm not even a foot-guy."

She playfully bit down on her lower lip and gave me a pair of jerks with her right foot. "I don't think 'little' Josh agrees with you." We'd come far in a single day - from hardly being able to clap one-another on the shoulder to her attempting to teasingly jack me off through my pants, but I was getting tired of the amusing game. Without release, I'd only ever get frustrated and thus, I finally tickled her feet enough for her to retract them. She pouted playfully as I rose and said: "Well, it's been fun, but I think I should go before you get greedy. It's only been one date, you know. I'm more like a 'third' kinda guy."

Her face contorted in a brief expression of panic as she shot up after me and apologized: "I-I'm sorry, Josh - I was just teasing you. It's been so long since we've joked around that I guess I got carried away-"

I reared my head as I saw the tremble to her sullen, nervous lips and raised my hands to disarm her. "It was weird, but it was fun, Sarah. I haven't had this much fun in years... I'm glad you canceled your shifts for this impromptu vacation."

She took a hopeful step forwards and discarded her frown for her warmest smile of relief: "Y-yeah, me too. I-... if you don't have any plans... could we-..."

I raised my thumb at her, immediately feeling like the biggest nerd in the world. "Maybe not the same eatery, but we'll find something. Been a while since we hiked?"

She clapped her hands once with excitement, before the demon inside of her returned to state the obvious: "With the tent you're pitching, we could make it a two-day trip!"

On my own, the demons returned. I lay awake in the night, staring up at the ceiling - seeing infected eyes and reprimands wherever my mind attempted to twist its attention. It was as I lay there and listened to the distant television that I became aware that my sister had yet to go to bed - in fact, I swore I could hear her rummage around downstairs in the kitchen. Deciding to practice my mindfulness techniques one more time, I sharpened my ears and filtered out all the sounds from the house to listen to her noise, only to find that I immediately regretted the decision. She was moaning.

Breakfast wasn't awkward - even after all that happened the previous day. Sarah was far more sparkly than I'd ever seen before, dancing around her axis as she served bacon directly from the pan in her brown apron. I couldn't help but feel a nearly-forgotten warmth return to my chest as I heard her hum occult melodies I wasn't even sure she knew herself... but it was nice having this ray of light in the house again - this playful demon whose soft lips had briefly touched mine and whose feet had been tightly wrapped around my-

"Josh? You all right?"

I broke from my profound musings to see her stare back at me from her chair with an expression of worry. "Yeah, just... thinking's all. Sorry."

She smirked and pushed her lengthy hair over her ears. "Stop apologizing for everything, numbnuts. If you're thinking about work again, I'll smack you with the ladle." She threateningly gripped the ladle and held it up to her side.

"S-... no. I was just thinking about yesterday. It was a nice day."

She put the ladle down carefully and bobbed her head sternly in agreement. "Damn right it was. I was on a date and we're going again today." I looked at her with confusion before a hopeful smile told me that this was a game.

I leaned forward on my hand and skewered a strip of bacon and brought it to my mouth. "He didn't do anything naughty, did he?" I asked.

She shook her head with the same stern lips. "Not at all. He was quite the gentleman, actually. Didn't even try to grab or anything."

"Good. Then I won't have to pull out my big brother moves."

She turned her brow up and dramatically reached for her chest: "Brother - dear brother. You mustn't be so defensive of me - how am I going to find a man to treat me right when you keep chasing them away?"

"You don't need no man. You'll have a bright career as an author and you can find a donor when you want kids. Until then, I'm the only man you need." I immediately grimaced once I'd realized what I'd said, though Sarah found it knee-clappingly hilarious, even if I obviously suffered with my hot, red cheeks.

The hike was beautiful - the day was perfect for it. The high sun in the bright, blue skies tested the resolve of our sunscreen like never before as we trekked up the mountainside - past the few patches of snow still clamoring to its passing un-life. When we'd finally gotten to the top of the plateau, we collapsed with exhaustion - truly driving the point home how terrible our condition had become over the years. She had laid down on her backpack in the moss, panting up at the skies while I had sat down in a crouch to conceal my heavy breathing - sister or not, I still had dignity as a man.

I was about to say something encouraging when my brain froze at the sight of her chest. Several buttons in her white shirt had been opened to allow the cool air to whip away at the beads of sweat clinging to her supple breasts, just above her pink sports bra.

She drew a deep breath of the fresh air, but my attention remained fixated on the parts of her pale chest I could see - at least until I heard: "Really? Dude, how backed up are you?" I looked up to see her grin back at me. I was horrified that, yet again, she'd caught me staring at her. But she neither buttoned her shirt, nor did anything to cover up. All she did was run her hand through her hair, soaking her fingertips in the darkening sweat before laying a hand atop the breast furthest away from me. This time, she apologized: "Sorry... I didn't mean anything by that. I mean, I'd be offended if you didn't look, you know. There's no way you can win with a girl in this situation:" I had to admit, she wasn't wrong from my experience. She looked back at me and pinched her left nipple through the fabric, diverting my attention to the one, solid, small nub I could see through the pink bra. Exercise had always had a calming effect on my libido, but the spring air combined with the strange sensations I'd been feeling somehow made it nearly impossible for me to calm down.

Gritting my teeth, I answered: "No, I'm the one who's sorry. Jesus, I can't tell what's wrong with me. I seriously don't-"

She raised a stern finger to her lips and spoke: "Shush. I told you, stop apologizing. If you really haven't handled yourself in six years, then it's a wonder you haven't jumped on one of your old, nasty patients yet. You gotta do something about that - skip a day of your meds or something."

The stinger in her words was clear - in order for us to maximize our time together, I'd have to 'deal with it'. How and when was up to me, but by my estimation, it would take a day for my levels to drop to the levels I'd be able to bust... and it had been so difficult to quit the first time around. "Yeah... I think you might be right."

The rest of the day was wonderful. We spent it fishing, cooking and lazily talking about my sister's stories. Curiously, she didn't want to touch on any topic regarding friends, school or past romantic interests - it was as if she wished for the past to remain in the past. Not that I had much to say about those years, either. Caring for a child while I, myself, had been a child hadn't been easy, but I'd done the best I could. And judging by her creativity, her infectious smile and the calming effects she had on me... I'd say I'd done all right.

At the end of another day, we lay in our open sleeping bags and stared up at the starry skies with similar smiles of contentment. Only a few days had passed of my lengthy vacation and I could already feel the world outside the hospital growing on me again - the place I'd removed myself from for all the pain it had caused... but in so doing, I'd ran the risk of losing her. And if it was one thing I wasn't ready for, then it was running such a risk again.

"Thanks for today. And yesterday." I heard her voice speak from my side. I turned to see her stare back at me from atop her elbows, still wearing her light, white shirt. Her genuine, peaceful smile reminded me of the girl I'd grown up with before it had all gone to shit - she was still the same, wonderful girl I'd been blessed with seeing into her adulthood.

"I should be the one thanking you. You had to double-time your essay for this trip... s-..." I caught myself saying it and kept my mouth shut, provoking an agreeing nod from her. She looked back up at the night's sky - towards the lights of the distant city before glancing down the plateau at the many twinkling houses around our town.

"I'd triple-time it for this... I can't really explain how it feels to me. I thought I'd lost you years ago, but I got you back. It goes without saying, that was my greatest wish for years." I was somehow surprised to hear it. Personally, I'd have done anything to have dad back and be released from my duties, but... as I looked up at her smile... I couldn't help but doubt that it would have been better if things were the way they were. Especially if this was who we could be.

Without a word, she reached her arm across me and fell to my shoulder, nuzzling into my naked, cooling skin with a deep sigh through her nose - sniffing me. "Well, next time you feel me slipping away, tell me. I did a lot of this for myself, but-... it doesn't mean anything if I burn our bridge in the process."

Her head jerked up and down on my shoulder. "Not letting you slip away, for sure. But by the end of the month, we're gonna find you someone to help me keep you around. How's the dating-app going?" I resisted the urge to look over at my phone - truthfully, I hadn't checked it once since she'd installed it. My lack of a reaction told her all she needed to - as I thought from the giggle. "Well, as long as you're still single, this counts as a date, right?" Her question was... confusing. I tried to look down at her, but she remained still, holding an arm across my bare chest.

I said: "Well, I'm learning more about women all the time I'm with you, so why wouldn't it?"

I felt her fingers tap against my chest. "Then... maybe we could..." She mumbled something into my skin that I didn't hear. "What?"

"M-maybe we could practice kissing again. Just so you're ready for when it happens." At this point, it dawned on me that something odd was going on. I didn't rise up - I didn't want this to become a big deal, but I asked her: "Sarah... does that sound right to you? I mean... you get what I'm saying, right?" To my surprise, she was oddly understanding of my stance.

I considered her weirdness for a moment longer. This was classical transference behavior - she was equaling my attention and the fun we'd been having with physical impulses and in so doing had become confused. I cleared my throat and spoke: "I promise. I'm not gonna go back to the way I was. This isn't about kissing or boners or... stuff. It's about me and you spending time together like a family."

She huffed a breath into my neck. "I know. It's not that, I-... I just liked it and so did you. It doesn't have to mean anything as long as it's fun... right?" It was fun. It was a whole lot of fun - that feeling in my stomach had lingered for a while afterwards, but it had also caused some physical side-effects that had in turn cursed me to a night of restless, horny slumbering.

She cautiously continued: "Just... stop me if you don't want it."

She rose up slowly and cautiously leaned over towards me - staring me in the face as she bit her lower lip nervously. Again, the moonlight and the fire lit her face up like the seductive angel she was - her pale cheeks, the strands of hair that tickled my face - I was stunned by her beauty alone. I felt her hand journey up my chest to rest at my cheek as she leaned in to speak into my mouth: "It's just some harmless fun... no one's around."

I wish I could say I resisted. But as soon as those lips touched mine, I was lost in her. The humidity and the warmth reanimated her shampoo, blasting me with her peachy, orangy scent. I felt my own hand defy my mind as it slid up her side to hold her by her rib. She slowly moved back, only for me to take charge and bend forwards to lock her in place - desperately clinging to those butterflies for as long as I could. The joy - the bliss. Everything about what we were doing felt so wrong, but it only heightened the intensity of the act itself. I felt her smile widen throughout our kiss and by the time I felt her tongue on mine, I knew that resisting was futile. The most we could do was simply enjoy this moment and the hormone-fuel, sinful act.

Again, I can't remember how the kiss ended, but as it did, she slunk back to my side with the widest pupils I'd ever seen, biting her sore lip and breathing hard. "That was... nice..." Was all I could say.

She eagerly nodded and giggled like the hormone-fueled twenty-year-old she was. "Yeah, it was... I don't understand it, but... I like it. I know it's wrong, but thinking about it never happening again is a worse thought." She muttered. Good. At least she understood that it was wrong.

"Yeah. Honestly, I think we're both a bit vulnerable... but I am your senior, so I should put my foot down."

"But you won't." She stated matter-of-factly.

"I don't even know what we're doing, so it's hard to say no, right?" I quizzed.

"Right. And you're hardly my senior - we're both immature losers." Somehow, it didn't sting at all when it came from her. Being likened to my sister in any fashion was a positive, in my book.

"I'm six years older than you - I should know better." I grumbled.

"Five and a half, thank you very much. And it's not like I'm not an adult who's well aware of what I'm doing with my lips. Affection's common between family members and since we have so few, we just have to get a bit more drastic." Made sense when she said it like that.

After a lengthy silence in which we just smelled one-another and listened to our breathing, I heard her whisper: "Makes me so tingly everywhere. Did you try last night?" I was well aware of what she was talking about. I shook my head, only to hear her "aww..." She paused to consider her next words carefully. "I... did." I turned to look at her seductive gaze as she went on: "That tingliness kinda just kept building and it wouldn't let go. When I was clearing the kitchen, I couldn't help myself anymore."

I shouldn't have asked... but I did. "Was it good?"

"Like you wouldn't believe. You'd have thought I was the one who'd been saving up for six years." Only a couple days previous, I would've cringed and maybe even retched as I imagined my sister leaned forwards on the kitchen counter with her hand down her soaked underwear. Now, the mental imagery made me so damn hard it hurt.

She kept going, too: "I can feel something happening down there. Isn't it time you try to give it a go again?" I raised my non-sister-wielding arm to rub my forehead. My heart was beating like mad, causing painful reverberations in the member tucked inside the sleeping bag.

"This is so fucked up..." I muttered as I relented and attempted to rise up, only for her to lay her body a bit more atop mine to push me back down. I looked at her with confusion as she looked down towards my crotch and spoke to the awakened dragon: "Please don't go. I've never seen it before - I'll just look, all right?"