Good Intentions Ch. 05

"Yeah," Brian agreed. "It was."

Brian then helped a boneless Quinten to lie back on the bed, then just as slowly as he went in, he pulled his hips back until his flaccid dick slipped free. Without it there, cum oozed out of Quinten's swollen, tender ass, his relaxed sphincter doing a poor job of springing back to normal. The teen 'ooh'ed, his cheeks pinking at the sensation. Drained of all energy, all Brian could offer was a tired, but satisfied, smile. He braced himself over top of Quinten's prone body on shaky limbs and pressed a kiss to his sweaty forehead, the sweat covering every inch of his own skin rapidly cooling.

"Love you," he breathed before rolling off and collapsing onto his back with a groan. He stared up at the ceiling, sedated. That had gone exceptionally well, like they were meant to be. Like they were made to be. The shame that had spooked him for days never came. All that he felt at that moment was peace and revelation. He had fought hard against it for nothing. He huffed out a laugh. Typical.

Since their arms were pressed comfortably together, Brian felt it the moment Quinten started trembling. He turned his head towards him and started to ask if he was cold when his brother, abruptly and loudly, burst into tears.

Brian bolted upright, the fine hairs all over his body standing on end in response to his sibling's distress. "Q-Quin? What's wrong?" His hands hovered uselessly as Quinten hid his face between his palms, his breathing wet and forceful. "Did I hurt you?"

Quinten shook his head, sending fat, salty tears racing out from between his clenching fingers. Brian hesitated before setting his hand down on his convulsing chest and tried calming him down by rubbing his sternum. It did nothing, and if nothing else, made Quinten lose his shit completely.

Brian drew back as if burned. He didn't understand. Quinten had been euphoric. Completely over the moon. Why was he crying like this? Was it a mistake after all? Now that the endorphins had dissipated and they were in their right minds again, the enormity of what they'd just done seemed to have overwhelmed Quinten to the point of mild hysteria. And with that understanding, Brian felt overwhelmed by the shame he thought he had successful evaded.

Bile raced up the back of his throat, forcing him to thickly swallow. There was the proof right there in front of him, the real proof that they shouldn't have done it. It was fun, absolutely transcending, but it wasn't worth this. Quinten couldn't handle it, the guilt of outright cheating his boyfriend out of sharing the most intimate part of his life hitting him hard.

"I'm so sorry," Brian told him, his own eyes growing wet.

Quinten lowered his hands, the sight of his tear-stricken face being possibly one of the worst things Brian had ever seen in his entire life. And it was all his fault.

As if reading his mind, Quinten shook his head again, his lips parted to gulp in air, his nose red and blotchy. When he tried to say something it looked and sounded like he couldn't find the air to breathe. Brian cupped his face, his own tears spilling over his cheeks and disappearing into his bearded jaw.

"Shh, it's okay."

"N-no," Quinten managed to choke out and grabbed Brian's hand; his nails dug in, anchoring him. "I-I'm the o-one," he forced out, his forest-green eyes blinking rapidly, "I- I'm s-sorry, Brian."

"What? Why? It's not your fault. I knew we shouldn't have done it, but I- it's my fault." He stroked a hand through Quinten's hair, which only seemed to make things worse.

Quinten's face scrunched up but he managed to rein it in before he fell apart again, the effort admirable. He gave a hard sniff, and avoiding Brian's worried expression, sat up.

"It is my fault," he whispered miserably, staring down at his lap. He took a deep breath, for the first time in minutes able to adopt a calm disposition, but Brian got the sick feeling that it was only a matter of time before he buckled. "Brian, I lied."

Brian stared, uncomprehending the word. "Lied? What are you talking about? About what?" The moment the words were out of his mouth, Brian felt a cool dread drip down his spine. His first instinct was to give his little brother the benefit of a doubt, because that was what family did for one another, but he had already figured out that Quinten had lied, that he had been lying for days now. But what about, he hadn't exactly known. Was he finally getting that answer now? Because Quinten felt guilty?

Was he ready to hear this?

Quinten's hands clenched into fists then loosened. Steeling himself. "About so much shit. Cal and I... we broke up."

"...what."

Quinten winced, his eyes squeezing shut hard enough to force more tears to race freely down his wet face as Brian openly gaped at him in disbelief.

"On Tuesday. After that morning, I realized that I couldn't do it anymore, that I couldn't pretend that he actually gave a fuck about me, not when you show me so much care and attention that it's actually quite nauseating." He laughed, the sound choked with phlegm, and wiped at his eyes none too gently with the heel of his palms. "So yeah. This entire week I've been lying to your face."

Here, he looked at Brian, who could do nothing more than continue staring back, slowly and surely putting the missing pieces together. Without being pressed, Quinten painted the picture for him anyway.

"I wasn't lying when I first brought it up, but every time after that, the truth is, I didn't need to practice for anal sex because I wasn't ever going to have it," he said. "Last night, when you asked me why I wasn't scared? That's because Cal never contacted me. And tonight? I wasn't at his place at all."

"Then where the fuck were you for two hours?" Brian interrupted. There was so much of his brother's speech that he wanted to backtrack over and pick apart, but this one, while not the most baffling, was the easiest to digest.

Quinten ducked his head away. "At a friend's. We played video games and-"

"Seriously?" Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. He took in a few deep breaths to control his emotions. He was so confused, so lost on where to start. "Why were you lying to me?" he asked quietly, then as he carried on, his voice grew in volume in correlation with his mounting frustration. "Did you think I'd stop giving you attention if you weren't dating anymore? I don't get it. Was this just a game to you? To see how long you could string me along?"

"No!" Quinten exclaimed. "It's nothing like that! I lied because... because..."

Brian sighed and looked him straight in his mossy eyes. "Because why, Quinten? Spit it the fuck out already."

Tears immediately sprang up and spilled over Quinten's fragile cheeks, his lips parting with quiet rasps. "B-because I'm in love with you and I don't know what to do!"

All of the anger, the confusion, the fear, it all disappeared in a flash. Brian's thought processes grinded into a dead stop, and try as he might, he couldn't rub two brain cells together long enough to utter a single word as Quinten hunched over and cried into his hands, as if admitting it physically pained him to do so.

The insatiable persona Quinten had adopted bled out freely, diminishing him into nothing more than another teenager desperately struggling to make sense of himself. And all Brian saw before him was Quin, his dear younger brother, reduced to shameless wracking sobs, clearly in pain. His body moved on autopilot until he had Quinten wrapped up securely in his arms, his emotional shivering echoing back into his own as his shoulder quickly grew damp. Not wanting to think anymore, Brian buried his face into his curls.

After many long minutes Quinten quieted down until he was reduced to nothing more than pitiful sniffles and the occasional sharp inhale until he seemed to have run out of steam and merely lay there against Brian, his body heavy.

"You should have told me," Brian mumbled.

Quinten's wet face slid from Brian's shoulder to the junction of his neck and collarbone, his arms loosely wrapped around his waist. "How?" he asked, sounding pathetic, a far cry from the haughty teenager he'd always been. "It's not normal. You would have hated me."

Brian tightened his hold on him, shocked that his brother, who he'd spent literal years comforting and simply being with, could ever think him possible of hatred. "I could never! I'd hate myself before I'd ever hate you." He shook his head. "But maybe I shouldn't be saying that, because I do. I do hate myself."

Like so many times before, he lightly skimmed a hand down Quinten's back before easing his fingers between the curls nestled at his nape, as though he was a wire in need of grounding. Quinten peeked up at him, a curious frown marring his brow.

"Because the truth of the matter, Quin, is that I've fallen for you, too."

Quinten's eyes widened then he was scrambling to sit up straighter, overeager. "You what? Really? Or are you just teasing me?"

"I'm not- teasing you, I mean."

He sucked in a breath, held it, then let it out slowly, along with words reminiscent of the ones he told Garret days before. The alcohol from the eggnog was long gone from his system, but it all came flowing out just as easy and free as it had when he was drowning in cognac.

"I love you as I should, as I'm supposed to, as your older brother, but ever since we started hooking up something within me changed. I began to notice you more, how multifaceted you are when you don't mean to be, how you've changed, evolved. You're not the Quinten I've grown up with. You're something different, something more, something that makes my heart hurt with how much I want you all the time. And truth of the matter? I'm so fucking ecstatic that you broke up with that man. I was so jealous of him."

Quinten was blushing, the corner of his bottom lip nibbled between his teeth. "You were?" he asked, sounding awed.

Brian smiled, shoulders slumped without the burden of keeping it all bottled inside. "Totally. I knew he was wrong for you without you even really telling me anything. I even told Garret that I wish you weren't dating. It's selfish, I know, but I really want to keep you all to myself."

"Wait, you talked to Garret about me?"

Where normally Brian would feel a tingle of foreboding at having let slip something he'd prefer to keep close to his chest, he felt nothing, except mental relief. "I did. He knows."

"He knows what, exactly?" Quinten asked slowly, simultaneously looking like he couldn't believe that Brian would be that dumb and strangely hopeful that his brother hadn't spilled everything to his best friend. He was about to be sorely disappointed.

"Everything. About us sucking each other's dicks and how I feel about you."

"Oh my god."

"And since we're being truthful, mom and dad know, too."

"Oh my god!"

"Oh god is right," Brian muttered, ignoring, for the moment, how deathly white Quinten had become. "Dad'll kill me if he finds out I forgot to use the condoms he gave me... if he asks, say that I did, okay?"

In lieu of an answer, Quinten flat-out fainted.

Brian cussed under his breath as he caught him before he could slump over onto the floor. He definitely could have worded that better, but once he began putting one word in front of the other, it all came flying out. Otherwise if he hadn't, he would have never ever told Quinten any of it, and he deserved to know just how many people knew about their sex life. At least it was over with, and when his brother roused, they could have a more in-depth discussion about it.

For now, Brian maneuvered him onto his back and curled up against his side, his pale eyes attentively watching his slack face for any sort of movement.

A few minutes later, Quinten let out a delirious moan and flopped his head over, his eyelids twitching until he opened them and was greeted by Brian's cautious smile.

"Welcome back."

Quinten glared at him, his mouth screwing up. "You," he croaked, raising an arm and pointing at him accusingly for added measure, "are an asshole."

"You've said."

"What the hell were you thinking telling everyone? Does the whole neighborhood know?"

Brian glared back, miffed by the accusation. "I only told Garret, and that was under duress. Mom and dad figured it out on their own. We were, and I quote 'not as sneaky as we thought'." He paused, let out a huff through his nose, then steered the conversation elsewhere; a less emotionally charged time would serve them better for that discussion. "I have to give credit where it's due... you took that news a lot better than I did."

Quinten passed a hand over his face and let out a tired sigh, his body relaxing into the sheets. "How'd you take it?"

"Well... there's a reason why I told you not to go into my room. I vomited," he said without fanfare.

Quinten winced in sympathy, looking at him. "Shit, yeah... I'll take passing out over that. Are you okay?"

Brian set his hand on his brother's soft stomach, the heat of his skin seeping into his own. He leaned over to press a chaste kiss to Quinten's lips, who easily returned it without thought; the familiar gesture made his heart flip and his entire chest warm with affection.

"I am now."

More color returned to Quinten's face along with a twitchy smile. "Sap," he muttered fondly, making Brian grin. "So..." he began lightly, grabbing the hand on his stomach and lacing their fingers together. His thumb shifted, tracing over Brian's knuckles with a tenderness that Brian hadn't known him possible of possessing. It was wonderful. "You love me."

"And you love me."

"Mh... so what now? Am I allowed to call you my boyfriend?"

"I wouldn't mind it," Brian offered, his own face heating up. "I mean, you've already been alluding to me acting like one."

"Awesome..." Quinten whispered, and holding his gaze, said, "You have no idea how happy this makes me, Bry. All of my wishes are coming true. This is the best Christmas ever."

Brian burned even hotter at that. He'd been wishing for this? Fucking, he understood, but dating him? He had somewhat of a hard time wrapping his head around that apparent fact. It all felt so surreal. Quinten wanting everything he wanted? It was nothing less than a dream. Leaning back over, Brian kissed him again.

"Merry Christmas, babe."

**

Halfway across town, Garret excused himself from his date's perfumed arms when he received a text message from Brian asking him if he was alone. She pouted up at him, looking absolutely irresistible with her delicate neck littered with lovebites and her bra thrown haphazardly over the back of the couch, her red lips kiss-swollen and her eyes two big smoky brown orbs. She had a hand down his pants, which he pulled out and kissed her fingertips with a patented charming smile, promising that he would only be a moment.

He walked off down the hallway of his apartment and slipped inside his room, his hard-on sagging as a wave of anxiety washed over him. He was well aware that Quinten had his big date tonight and that Brian had been lying between his teeth that he wasn't bothered. Garret had given him the benefit of a doubt, not wanting to jump down his throat and be a mother hen, and for a while, he thought he'd been worrying over nothing. But with this out of nowhere text, he wished he had been a better friend and gone over there. He vehemently wished that Brian hadn't done anything... awful.

Text Sent 10:28 p.m.

I am now wuts wrong

Garret sat heavily on his bed and began chewing his nails, his eyes glued to the screen.

Text Received 10:29 p.m.

Nothing's wrong relax

Just thought you might appreciate this (:

A second later, a picture loaded in.

Garret slapped a hand over his face before throwing his head back and laughing like a loon, prompting his date to cautiously call out and ask him if something was the matter.

"It's all good!" he called back, his cheeks aching with how hard he was grinning. "It's all good."

In the picture the brothers were snuggled up together in bed, their torsos bare and their lips slotted together in what appeared to be a thorough kiss. Brian had one eye open and was looking straight at the camera, his arm outstretched to hold his phone aloft. Quinten, for his part, ignored it completely - aside from the middle finger directed towards the viewer, signaling that he was well aware of what his brother was doing.

It was perfect.

**

End Note: I'm gonna try to be a bit more organized, so I'm going to be keeping a small list of projects currently in the works up on my profile. I have (no joke) over 40 started stories, but for sake of brevity I'm only listing the top 5 that are closest to being done. I'm going to try and keep the list updated at 1-2x a month.