Green Nude Deal Ch. 03

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Wardrobe malfunction makes headlines at film premiere.
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Part 3 of the 3 part series

Updated 06/09/2023
Created 04/02/2019
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"Why don't you just call it 'Emission: Impossible' or 'Climate Commando' and be done with it?"

Malcolm Coates wasn't exactly thrilled by "Operation Zenith," the screenplay his girlfriend Ashleigh Lillian Kirby had written. He was convinced that making such a film would wreck his career again. Yet Ashleigh was nothing if not persistent.

"You don't see the potential?" she replied. "People love a good thriller with a lot of action in it--especially if it has a good message."

"Yeah, but it has to be a *good* thriller."

"Shut up," she laughed.

Ashleigh wrote the script to give herself an ideal starring role for her debut film. In "Operation Zenith," set in the fictional country of Verdeland, Ashleigh would play Julie Kingsmill, the country's new prime minister, who in her first major policy speech announces that she will seek to halt the further development of Verdeland's lucrative oil, natural gas and coal reserves in the name of combating climate change, and push to move the country towards full reliance on renewable energy by 2030. The "Keep It In the Ground" speech outrages fossil-fuel industry executives, who form a conspiracy to overthrow the Kingsmill government--and hire a retired CIA special agent named Henry Winston to lead the coup. Winston is offered $10 million to recruit an elite squad of ex-soldiers to topple the Kingsmill government, but when he actually hears the "Keep It In the Ground" speech, he has a change of heart--and resolves to thwart the effort to remove Kingsmill from power.

The success of Ashleigh's Artists United for Climate Awareness ad meant that the major studios were quite interested in doing business with the Aussie model--and the fact that the director of the ad was attached to "Operation Zenith" only sweetened the deal. In the end, Maybach Pictures and First Fleet Pictures agreed to co-finance "Operation Zenith," with Maybach distributing the film in the United States and First Fleet distributing in the rest of the world.

Malcolm was convinced that he needed a compelling physical presence to play Henry Winston--"someone with Harry Belafonte's face and Arnold Schwarzenegger's body," he remarked--and he found his star in Tommy Williams, a former Florida State University quarterback who never made it to the NFL due to a knee injury. Williams had turned to acting after his football days ended, usually playing enforcers, bouncers, hitmen or bodyguards; he relished the chance to finally play a lead role. Tommy had great chemistry with Ashleigh when they rehearsed their scenes together, but Malcolm wasn't worried that Tommy might try to steal her away from him; the ex-footballer was dating Meghna Banerjee, a sexy British singer of Indian descent, and as he told Malcolm at one point, "The pale chicks aren't really my type."

You don't know what you're missing, Malcolm thought to himself.

"Operation Zenith" was filmed for four months in Queenstown, New Zealand (Ashleigh's proclamation that she had modeled her character on the country's prime minister, Jacinda Ardern, while writing the script helped to open more than a few doors). The production was remarkably conflict-free; Malcolm had heard that Tommy wasn't the easiest person in the world to work with, but he was on his best behavior, possibly because Meghna, who was recording an album at Studios 301 in Sydney, Australia, stopped by every few weeks to see him. Malcolm was also stunned by Ashleigh's abilities as an actress; though she had undergone several months of acting lessons prior to filming, he had not expected his girlfriend to be so natural on camera, though he chalked it up to the fact that it was her passion project--and that she probably imagined becoming the prime minister of Australia herself one day.

After several months of post-production, and three successful test screenings, "Operation Zenith" premiered at the Director's Guild Theater on West 57th Street in New York City in advance of its release on Earth Day in the United States. After the film concluded with a standing ovation, Malcolm, extremely handsome in a black tuxedo, took the stage and thanked the audience. "This is a project I was very proud to work on, and I'm really happy you enjoyed it. Tommy was great to work with, and it's a shame that he couldn't be here with us tonight--a certain singer might have something to do with it," he joked. "However, this film would not have been made without the creative vision, tireless passion and beautiful spirit of the leading lady, who's also *my* leading lady: Miss Ashleigh Lillian Kirby."

Ashleigh walked towards the microphone wearing a loose-fitting grey dress made of sustainable fabric. After kissing Malcolm, Ashleigh thanked the audience for appreciating the film and the message she tried to send.

"What will it take to wake the world up? That's the question my character asks in this film, and that's the question I ask tonight. What will it take for all of us to come together to solve this crisis? What will it take for each and every one of us to realize just how precious this planet is? Climate change is the greatest challenge of our time, and we need a mobilization, across this nation and around the world, to conquer this challenge. We must all rise up--"

As she lifted her arms to emphasize her point, both of the thin straps on her dress suddenly snapped, and the audience gasped; Ashleigh had no underwear on, and was completely bare except for her grey shoes and a silver bracelet on her left hand. As cell phone cameras snapped furiously, Malcolm ran towards Ashleigh to usher her off the stage, making sure to grab the dress from the floor as they raced to the back.

Some members of the audience wondered if the incident was some sort of intentional publicity stunt, a callback to the nude ad for Artists United for Climate Awareness; indeed, the next morning the New York Post, assuming the incident was deliberate, plastered a photo of Malcolm's arm covering Ashleigh's pale breasts above the headline "POLAR BARE: Eco-woke Aussie model Kirby sheds her clothes for climate--again!" If it was a publicity stunt, it certainly worked; "Operation Zenith" became an international hit, grossing $415 million worldwide.

A week after the film's US release, Variety directly asked Ashleigh if the incident was a publicity stunt. The model/actress/activist/screenwriter replied with a smile:

"Well, it's certainly now the most famous dress in the world, is it? Or should I say undress?"

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