All Comments on 'Have You Seen Your Sister?'

Great story! Hope there is a follow up! *****

Great story. Hope there's a part 2 soon.

Good read, but just a little flat

This had better be a Part One! You left it hanging perfectly. Can’t wait for more.

If Jess is 21 and he’s several years older and working full time, how can he still be in the family home without looking like a leach? If Dad’s leaning on Jess to better herself, why not him? I have a few good answers, but do you?

It was a beautiful story until the disappointing ending. What a letdown.

I noticed this author doesn't put 'part 01' or any indication that this is the first part of a multi-part story. I checked the end of this one before I started reading - and there's nothing about a continuation. But ... the comments seem to say this is, indeed, a part 1.

Not sure if I want a threesome with this trio…yet.

Part 2 will come. Sorry I'm bad at titles for the first parts. D:

Great story but Part two is a must!

Excellent story, I loved it, but I’m like everybody else, the story ended abruptly, it needs a part 2.

Would love a Pt 2 :)

The begining was great. I think you moved a little too fast with violet. Its all too easy how she just shows up with the baby doll not noticing its transparent.. and then quickly wants to touch his penis. Too fast, too easy

Hope some sibling love babies happen!!

In spite of the corny dialog, I actually enjoyed this story. But seriously, siblings speaking to each other rarely emphasize "brother" or "sister" in their dialog. You need to confine it to the narrative. For example, "I really love you a lot," my sister said." as opposed to "I really love you a lot bro," she said. I hope that you can understand the difference.

Another issue was changing from past tense to present tense, then back again. Conveniently for me, you committed that rookie mistake all together in the following paragraph:

"She put her mouth around my penis and licked it all around. I've never asked her to do that, I guess she just likes to keep me clean. She wipes herself clean and puts her clothes back on."

Tell your story from PAST TENSE and stay there! 5/5

On to the next part . . . .