Homeomorphism - Prelude

Author's Note(s): While Hayley isn't transgender, she can certainly be read as such. This story deals with themes of gender dysphoria and insecurity, as well as the fetishization and exploitation of these feelings. If this makes you uncomfortable, please turn back now. If you are transgender, please always know that you belong and you are loved.

Welcome to Chapter 1 of Homeomorphism!

This chapter represents the beginning of the story I was testing out in "Caged - Introduction." As you can tell by the page count, I got a little carried away with this one, but I hope it does a good job of fleshing out the characters. The smut is somewhat sparse here, but it certainly has its moments. As the story goes on, the smut will occur more frequently and become far more depraved ;)

As a note, the events of "Caged" are no longer cannon to this story, so don't expect things to shape up in quite the same way.

As always, constructive criticism is welcome.

Hope you enjoy!

***

Hayley laid in her bed, absentmindedly stroking her cock as the morning sun peeked through her blinds.

I really should get some blackout curtains, she thought to herself. Melanie had installed a pair in her room a few months ago and, on the rare early morning occasion that Hayley snuck in to steal Melanie's charger or a scoop of her pre-workout, she would take a moment to bask in the void the room had become.

It's not like Melanie even needs hers, Hayley scoffed, she sleeps through everything.

To be honest, Hayley didn't mind a little sun to wake her up in the morning. In fact, she much preferred it to the incessant chirp of her alarm clock, sounding not unlike a dying frog (or at least what Hayley assumed a dying frog sounded like). No, her true motivation to shroud herself in complete darkness was slightly less conventional - masturbation.

Hayley had always been ashamed of her penis. While her parents did their best to comfort her, reminding her that "nobody will even know it's there as long as you don't tell them" or "you still have a vagina, so you're not really any different from the rest of the girls in your class," they only ever succeeded at engraving Hayley's abnormality deeper into her psyche. To her, their efforts always seemed more focused on getting Hayley to forget about her distinction rather than embrace it. "We love you in spite of your differences," never just "we love you." And while Hayley eventually learned to forgive her parents, realizing that they truly did believe they were helping her, it was too late, the damage had been done.

Once, Hayley decided to tell her best friend, Jane, about her condition. Having kept it a secret for so long, Hayley could feel it eating away at her like a worm slowly devouring an apple, turning it rotten. Hayley spent weeks building up the courage and even more weeks attempting to broach the topic, but every time the words stuck to her throat and all she could muster was a shy "never mind." Finally, after a particularly fun day involving a grade-wide dodgeball tournament and an ice cream social on the playground, Hayley felt the nerve strike her like a lightning bolt. Grabbing Jane's hand, she led her to the corner of the playground where they hid under a slide.

Hayley confessed exactly as she had practiced 100 times in her head, taking special care to include the statistics her parents so often repeated. Her mind ran on autopilot, too afraid to speak manually, knowing that doing so would cause her to freeze up like every time before. As she spoke, Hayley imagined Jane's reaction. She imagined Jane giving her a hug, telling her that she didn't care what Hayley had between her legs, maybe even telling Hayley that they were the same. She imagined running back to the field afterward to finish their ice cream and lie in the sun with their friends, feeling more relaxed than she ever had in her life knowing she had somebody to share her secret with.

Her speech ended and Hayley felt like she had just thrown up. Queasy, with a few words still sticking to her lips, but ultimately relieved. The hard part was over, she had done it. As the conscious part of her mind took over again, Hayley registered the look on Jane's face for the first time. She felt her stomach drop into her knees. Jane looked at her the same way boys would look at a rotting animal, disgusted but amused. Hayley felt like she was going to throw up for real.

"You're a boy?" Jane exclaimed, practically laughing with disbelief. Hayley offered nothing in return, every muscle in her body paralyzed with fear. "Ewwww, you're a boy," she repeated, more matter-of-factly this time.

Hayley told Jane exactly as she had planned, what did she do wrong? She felt her breath quickening as her eyes welled up until Jane was just a blurry smudge in her vision. She watched helplessly as that smudge stood up and started running towards the field. Through the ringing in her ears, Hayley could hear Jane shouting "Hayley is a boy! Hayley is a boy!"

Hayley's parents had always made her feel different, lesser than everybody else. But it was in this moment, sitting alone beneath the slide, listening to her friends laugh and gawk at her, that Hayley finally realized it was true.

***

Following the incident, Hayley's life underwent four significant changes.

Most immediately, Hayley's parents decided to move. Once again, an act of support they intended to show their daughter that only served to deepen her shame, as if they were saying "your classmates were justified in their rejection of you."

Secondly, Hayley made herself a promise. She would take control of her body, sculpting herself into an object of desire. She had lived her entire life in a body that she didn't want, one that made her feel different even when others didn't know her secret. Now, finally, she could build a body that she did want, one that society would accept. Hayley believed, no, she knew that if others openly expressed their jealousy and lust towards her, if everybody either wanted to be her or fuck her, then she would finally have confirmation that the whole world didn't secretly despise her, and she could accept herself.

As soon as she was old enough, Hayley bought a gym membership and started to follow a strict regimen that she had developed herself after studying countless recommendations from fitness influencers and online articles. Squats and crunches and lunges became daily routine for her. When she began she couldn't even run a mile, but she quickly progressed until she could run a 5k while hardly breaking a sweat. She even spent time developing her calisthenics and flexibility, knowing that it would help her appear more graceful. That was her ultimate goal, after all - grace and beauty. She didn't work out to get strong. She didn't work out to feel good (although she had to admit, it did feel good). She worked out to look perfect. To become somebody that everybody wanted to fuck. And it worked.

At 20 years old and a junior in college, Hayley drew lustful glances wherever she went. She stood at 5' 11", which was a little taller than she would have liked, but it did wonders to highlight her athletic figure. Her legs were long and tight, features that were both accentuated by the thigh gap she had spent years developing. Creating the perfect gap had proved to be Hayley's biggest challenge as she wanted to ensure her legs never appeared thin. Given enough time, however, she achieved this too, taking great pride in doing so. If one were to describe her butt (as many were known to do), "bubble" would be the operative word. Much like her legs, Hayley sculpted her butt meticulously until it was big enough to be seen through a loose-fitting dress or sway hypnotically from side to side as she walked, but never any bigger, maintaining its perfectly round shape. Of course, one couldn't speak about "perfectly round" things without mentioning Hayley's breasts. They weren't particularly large, sitting comfortably in B cups, but their real defining characteristic was that they seemed to defy gravity. Even without a bra they sat on Hayley's chest like she was wearing a push up, her perfectly flat stomach only highlighting their prominence.

Of course, hard work and dedication could only get you so far. Hayley knew this, so she was forever grateful that she had been born to two gorgeous parents. At least she could thank them for something. In high school, Hayleys friends would loudly and frequently express their annoyance with her natural beauty. Her face was sharp, radiating a sort of royal elegance, a sharp contrast to her big brown eyes. Paired with her full lips, all it took was a little pout from Hayley and men would give her whatever she wanted (unfortunately for men everywhere, she bats for the other team). Oddly enough, despite the never-ending work Hayley had put into the rest of her body, her favorite feature was her hair.

A rich, chocolatey brown, Hayley cared for and kept it meticulously, so it fell straight down her back like a silky waterfall. She believed it to be a critical component of her beauty, framing the angles and curves of her face, contrasting her skin but complimenting her eyes, accentuating both. She wouldn't give it up for the world. Lastly, Hayley's mother had gifted her with a pair of hips that perfectly tied together the rest of her figure. Their width made her legs appear even fuller while simultaneously highlighting her thigh gap, not to mention making her already small waist seem smaller. And if that weren't enough, the "v" of her hip bones flowed seamlessly alongside the lines on either side of her stomach created by her abs, giving her a midriff that seemed to stretch on forever. Hayley had crafted a body worthy of applause, almost as if she were being written by a particularly lascivious author. Nobody would ever call her a boy again.

The third change in Hayley's life was an unconscious one. While her choice to become beautiful was deliberate, the same need for acceptance driving that decision also drove a change in her behavior. She became obsessed with being the best. Not just the best looking, but the best at everything. She needed to excel academically, anything below a 4.0 meant she had failed. She needed to excel socially, her presence desired by any and everyone. She needed to excel physically, joining her college's track team after outperforming everyone in her high school. None of this registered to Hayley as a behavior born out of the shame she had suffered. To her, it just seemed like the right way to live. Consequently, she also became more judgmental. Where once there was a sweet girl who wanted nothing more than to be friends with everybody on the planet, now there was a woman who wanted to be better than everybody on the planet.

Life became a game of chess, every interaction an opportunity to further Hayley's prestige, obscuring herself behind a veil of enigmatic seriousness - almost a regality. Everything was a challenge to her now, and everybody else was competition. She would judge them silently, picking apart their flaws and deficiencies. If they ever had something Hayley didn't, whether it was a particular curve on their body or an academic distinction or even a small piece of jewelry she liked, Hayley would make it her mission to have it too.

Fourth and final, Hayley made the decision that she would never share her secret with another person again. Not even her roommates, her two best friends, knew.

Hayley met Sophia and Melanie her freshman year. They had been put in a chemistry lab together and quickly became friends, bonding over their shared love of television and working out. Sophia was almost as tall as Hayley, but she was a little thinner as she tended to focus on cardio at the gym. Her hair was brown, several shades lighter than Hayley's, and generally done up in a messy bun. She was very friendly, always looking a little lost. Hayley always thought of her like a puppy, constantly on the lookout for someone or something new to play with. Melanie was the exact opposite. She barely reached 5 feet tall with blonde hair that she almost always kept in a tight ponytail. Her time at the gym was always spent training intensely, doing her best to compensate for her short stature. Her perpetual deadpan stare matched her sardonic personality, giving her an abrasive appearance to those who didn't know her very well. The three of them complemented each other well.

Concealing her secret proved to be a challenge at first. Hayley never had to take special care to conceal her penis while living with her parents, and she had rented a one-bedroom apartment her freshman year, but for budgetary reasons (and, although she wouldn't admit it, because she was lonely), she chose to move in with the two other girls Sophomore year. This forced Hayley to adapt her living habits, her initial paranoia eventually fading into a very deliberate caution. Principal to her practices, anytime she left her room she would wear a pair of tight compression shorts underneath her clothing. While they were certainly uncomfortable, the shorts gave Hayley peace of mind that there wasn't even the slightest suggestion of a bulge. In fact, as Hayley unwillingly found out barely a month into her new living arrangement, the shorts could even prevent others from feeling her dick.

***

After a particularly long and taxing week for the girls, they had all gathered on the living room couch to watch Love Island, a recommendation from Melanie. They had all taken their regular spots, Hayley in the middle with the other girls on either side, when Sophia abruptly laid herself down on Hayley's lap. Hayley jolted backwards on the couch reflexively to get Sophia's head as far away from her crotch as possible. Sophia knew Hayley was gay, it wasn't something Hayley kept secret, so she had developed a penchant for teasing Hayley, flaunting herself and saying suggestive things. Hayley didn't know what her motivation was, maybe she liked the attention, maybe she liked watching Hayley squirm, when Hayley was feeling hopeful, she'd imagine it was because Sophia was gay too, but truthfully, she didn't know. Over the course of their freshman year, Hayley had grown accustomed to Sophia's repeated advances, usually brushing her off or, to the surprise of Hayley herself, even playing along. But one thing Sophia never did was touch Hayley inappropriately to tease her. So, when she laid her head down, not even intending to tease Hayley, it was the closest anybody had ever been to Hayley's penis (doctors and parents notwithstanding, of course). Sophia turned around, giving Hayley a confused look.

"What the fuck" she asked with a smile. Hayley didn't respond, her heart was beating so loud she was sure that both her roommates could hear it. She didn't know what to do. Sophia was sensitive, so if Hayley asked her to sit up and stop touching her it could upset her. The same was true if she decided to excuse herself for the night. But Hayley would much rather leave Sophia upset than let her find out her roommate had a dick.

Fuck, did she already feel it?

Hayley's heart sank at the thought of needing to switch schools for the second time. She studied Sophia's face intently, looking for even the slightest hint that she knew more than she was letting on.

Nothing.

She doesn't know. She can't. Her head barely even touched me.

"Sorry," Hayley said, trying to mimic Sophia's air-heady tone, "I wasn't looking, and I totally thought your hair was a spider."

Sophia and Melanie looked at each other questioningly but their attention was immediately drawn back to the TV as one of the contestants shouted, "I got a text!" Hayley's entire body relaxed, feeling as if she was sinking into the couch.

Thank...fucking...God.

"Get back here, bitch" Sophia giggled, pulling Hayley's thighs back under her head.

As long as Sophia doesn't move her head, I'll be fi-

Hayley froze. Sophia had rolled her head backwards to look up at Hayley, the back of her skull now lying directly on Hayley's cock.

"I swear to God" Sophia groaned "your legs are softer than my pillow. I mean what the fuck."

Hayley couldn't speak. She couldn't move. She could hardly even think. To Sophia, it seemed like Hayley was entirely disinterested in her complement.

"Thanks, Sophia" Sophia mocked playfully, turning back towards the TV.

Hayley spent the rest of the night in shock, barely watching the episode as she reassured herself over and over and over again that everything was alright. Every time Sophia would turn her head up to ask a question or crack a joke, it would roll onto Hayley's cock, and she would feel her stomach tighten. But Sophia never felt a thing through Hayley's protective shorts.

***

If Hayley had it her way, the shorts would never come off. For the first several months of living with Sophia and Melanie, she would only take showers when she knew they were both asleep or out of the house. Even now she would keep her showers as brief as possible when they were home. She never left her room without a pair on, no matter how brief her excursion. Even when she was in her room they wouldn't come off. There was, unfortunately, one exception. Hayley needed to masturbate on a regular basis.

Hayley never talked about her condition with her parents. Whenever the topic arose, their voices overflowed with pity as if Hayley were a hideous monster that couldn't be loved. "Of course, we love you" they would always say. "You're perfect to us." All Hayley heard was "of course nobody else loves you, you'll always be imperfect to them." In spite of the hatred she harbored towards the subject, or maybe even because of it, Hayley often found herself incapable of stifling her curiosity.

Growing up, she would scour the gutters of the Internet on a regular basis. Each and every time she would imagine that it was her first, like she hadn't visited the same website 100 times before, like she would open it this time and it would tell her "You're Normal! Everybody else is just like you!" But it would always tell her the same thing. In scientific terms, she was known as a hermaphrodite, "bearing only female chromosomes while expressing both male and female sexual reproductive organs." Colloquially, she was called a futanari. She hated the term. It was pornographic and lewd, a sexualization of her condition. According to Google, approximately 1/10th of 1% of all women shared Hayley's condition. Although this meant there were hundreds of thousands of women like her, Hayley didn't feel any less alone. She had never met anybody else like her. Never seen one on the news or in a TV show. It may as well have been just her. The condition was the result of a recessive mutation, the cause of which was still unknown. Some theorized that it was the result of nuclear radiation, others thought it represented a new evolution for mankind, while others were convinced it was the work of aliens.

As she got older, however, Hayley's "research" began to wane. Instead, she would spend her time devising new workout regimens or on the track. In fact, by the time Hayley began college, it had been almost two years since she had even thought about it. Until the night Sophia laid on her lap, that is.

By the time their second episode of the night came to an end, Hayley was exhausted. Melanie was fast asleep, her mouth hanging open, drooling all over her own shoulder.

"I swear she must be a narcoleptic or something" Sophia said.

Hayley chuckled, thankful that she could finally escape from the prison she had been confined in for the past 2 hours. But just before she could excuse herself, Sophia announced "welp, I'm sleeping here tonight," her words becoming muffled as she turned over and dove headfirst into Hayleys thighs.