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Click hereDays had gone by since I went to "that" spa. I went about my usual routine and tried to bury what happened under my subconscious. Really, at the time, it felt like a dream I had rather than something that I actually did days ago. Maybe it was the constant steam and moisture in the air inside of the sauna, but admittedly, my memory of the day was hazy.
It really was the beginning of my transformation. I just didn't know it then. The first sign of change was later at night, when I was alone at home. Images of that night kept intruding my thoughts. Like scratching an itch, I decided to pull out my lube and settle in for a hot night alone.
I think it is a typical coping method for us guys to watch porn when we are faced with unresolved sexual tension in real life. Like when we have a crush, we watch porn of someone similar to free ourselves temporarily of the lustful control that our cocks have over our minds. So, I did just that. Only, something was slightly different.
I started noticing things in the videos, almost like seeing it from different perspectives. Here is this absolutely stunning tanned, curvy blonde. I would always think about how hot it would be to fuck one of these beautiful blondes who flaunt their beautifully sun-kissed bodies at the beaches. In the videos, they were almost always waxed down below, a sight that would give many men a hard-on instantly. It's very erotic to see because it's done with the intention of seducing the man, or more specifically to coax the man into giving her his thick hot white cock.
I am a very avid edger. I love to deny myself and ejaculate much later with all the pent up cum from watching porn videos. I would tab at least 10 videos or so and watch them until the right moment, the right scene, with the right woman being fucked. It didn't matter who the guy was, the woman and her pussy was the star of the show.
I would fantasize about how amazing it would be to be the male actor in these videos and never before this day, did I envision myself as the girl in the videos. But that night, I think it was while I was watching a girl being gangbanged by a group of men when I started realizing my new unconscious truth- I wanted to be fucked like the girl.
My erection got harder than ever before. The head of my cock was engorged and streams of precum were flowing down the shaft of my cock like a gentle river. I could feel the cum inside brewing, rushing towards the head of my cock. I knew it wouldn't take many more strokes. I quickly grabbed the lube and bathed my fingers. I wanted to be the submissive slut that I was watching in the video. I raised my legs onto the table, reached under my balls and slipped my index finger in my ass. I took a break from pumping my cock and focused on my finger. It wasn't my first time giving myself anal stimulation during masturbating, but it definitely was the first time I did so in a submissive way. I closed my eyes in pure ecstasy. The video in front of me slowly faded away as images of the Man who flirted with me at the sauna and his cock dominated my mind. I thought about how great it would feel deep throating his thick white cock. He would hold my head down and I would look up towards his strong gaze...my ass hole twitching and aching to feel his strong cock stretch my anal sphincter. And after filling my throat with his delicious man-cum, I'd turn around and he'd fill me up with more of his manly cum.
As these thoughts raced through my mind, I felt a rush of ecstasy. Two, maybe three strokes is all it took with two fingers shoved in my ass. I think I moaned for the first time in my life, and yes it sounded like a bitch.
That's when I felt a gentle tap on my head.
I ejaculated so hard, the cum shot out and landed on top of my head. There was a healthy blob entangled in my hair, small squirts on my face, and a long streak of cum on my stomach pooling in my belly button that trailed down to the base of my cock.
The fog that I was in was gone and now all I wanted to do was clean up.
I washed up and went to bed, again.
The fog of lustful tension that I alluded to earlier was gone and I felt liberated.
I knew I could now find peace and move on with my life. I had work the next day so I needed at least a few hours of beauty rest. That way I could make it through the day and then, afterwards, go back to have some fun again at a sauna.