How I REALLY Met Your Mother Pt. 01

"There's nothing wrong with this ship, it's just old," Helen replied. "Now get on. It's going to take at least a month to get back on this thing, so we need to get going now."

I couldn't really argue with that, so I walked up the rampway onto our new ship, conveniently named the Lucky Pawn.

Finally it was over. I was collapsed on a chair in the ship's lounge just allowing myself to finally relax as I listened to the sounds of the ship as it slowly got up to speed. I was busy trying to wrap my head around what had happened. Mostly I was still in shock that it had actually worked. I almost didn't notice as Helen and Vectress walked in and took some seats of their own. "So it's all finished now?" I asked, tensing up slightly, even though I knew the answer.

"Course is laid in. We can all relax now," was Helen's response.

I heard a door slide open to the side of me as Nuetronia's voice called out, "Ahh, it will be good to finally relax and be ourselves for a little while."

I turned my head to look at her and my eyes practically bulged out my head. Nuetronia had apparently changed while we were taking off and she was now walking towards me wearing the slave girl outfit she'd been wearing when I'd first met her. "Wha-what are you doing?!" I sputtered out nonsensically as my eyes refused to move away from her lithe figure.

Nuetronia just grinned as she saw me staring at her. "I noticed how much you enjoyed seeing me in this the last time, so I thought it would be a good thing to commemorate our first time together."

My brain started to short circuit when she said that. I mean, she was an alien, so maybe she didn't quite understand human vernacular. After all, she couldn't possibly mean what that seemed to mean, could she? "First....time?" I said, repeating back what she said as though my brain couldn't possibly come up with anything else at the moment.

Nuetronia began to look confused when she heard that. "Our first time having sex of course," She responded. "I assumed that now that we are away from the eyes of my brother and the media you would want to claim me as your own Master."

Okay, so she was thinking about the same thing I was. But hold on a minute, what did she say? "Wait. Why did you call me Master?" I asked.

Nuetronia tilted her head, even more confused now. "Because you are my Master. Why else would I call you that?"

Vectress stood up then and put her hands up in a placating gesture towards Nuetronia. "It's okay Nuetronia, he just doesn't know?'

"I am confused. How can he not know?"

Not know what? Vectress' response upset me. Clearly Vectress knew something and just wasn't bothering to tell me what it was. "Allright, I'm getting sick and tired of this. Could somebody PLEASE just tell me what's going on!" I shouted.

"I'll explain it," Helen said as she stood up from her chair. "After all, this is my fault anyway, so it's my responsibility to tell you what I did...and why."

Helen then approached me and once she got close, she took my hands in her own. "There's no easy way to explain, so I guess I'll start with the basics," She began. "I told you that you were chosen, because this mission couldn't be completed without you, but I never told you why. The truth is, the reason you're here is because you have a superpower."

"Superpower?" I said incredulously. "C'mon, I've seen guys with superpowers. They all look like bodybuilders, which, in case you haven't noticed, doesn't apply to me."

"Of course they look like greek gods, they have combat powers. You on the other hand, don't, so naturally you're not going to look quite like they do."

This whole thing was just frustrating me now. "Okay, so let's pretend I have powers. What exactly are they then?"

"Contracts,"

"What?"

"Contracts," Helen repeated. "To put it simply, anytime you willingly sign a contract you and anyone else who also willingly signs the contract are bound to obey whatever was in the contract."

"That's insane! Even if it was true that doesn't explain why Nuetronia...was...acting like my....slave."

Oh fuck. The slave contract. I'd had Nuetronia sign it as a ruse to convince Zagron that I was really planning to turn her into my slave. But if what Helen said was true, then the moment she signed it, she became my slave for real.

"Wait a minute," I said, thinking fast. "But if that was true, then wouldn't Vectress..."

"Be your slave?" Vectress responded with a smug grin. "Surprise Master."

"But but but," I started sputtering, "but, if you got turned into a slave, why didn't you tell me?"

"Because if I did you wouldn't have fucked me," Vectress responded nonchalantly.

I just stared at her in disbelief. Had Vectress really just said that? "What?" she said after watching me for a while. "You know it's true. You would have been all like, 'no, I can't take advantage of you, this is wrong,' and then I would spend the whole week not getting fucked, not to mention the fact that we'd probably never be able to enslave Nuetronia to you."

"Wait, you were deliberately trying to enslave Nuetronia?"

"Well how else were Nuetronia and I going to be slave sisters?"

"Ahh, you wanted to be slave sisters with me? That's so sweet," Nuetronia said, butting in.

"Why are you all acting like this?" I shouted in frustration.

Helen was the one who answered me this time. "It's because of the language of the contract."

I looked over at her, "What language?"

"You didn't notice because you can't read Larnian. You see, Larnian's don't care about the specific wording of a contract, they're more interested in the intent behind it. As a result their contracts don't really have any legalese and are instead full of more...poetic language. For example, on their slave contracts they don't talk about a slave obeying their Master so much as they talk about the slave dedicating their mind, body and soul to them instead."

I collapsed into the chair and put my head in my hands. "Oh god," I said. "When the League finds out..."

"And how exactly are they going to find out?" Helen cut in. "I mean, I'm not going to tell them, and Vectress and Nuetronia won't."

"Yeah, fuck that," Vectress said. "If they found out they'd just try to break your control over me and there is no way I'm giving up being your personal cumdump."

"I'm also unwilling to give up being your slave," Nuetronia added as she kneeled down next to me, placing her hand on my knee.

"So, like I said," Helen continued, "I won't tell them, and neither will they. So the only one who could tell them is you and you can't."

"Can't," I said almost mechanically.

"Don't you remember that NDA I had you sign? I put a few little extra bits into it. Basically you can't do anything to let anyone who isn't in this room right now know what really happened on this mission and that includes the fact that Vectress and Nuetronia are your slaves now."

I was stunned into silence. Helen had been playing me from the very beginning. Everything had been set up just for this. "Why?" I finally asked, almost in a whisper.

Helen sighed when she heard me say that. "Because I had to," She said.

Helen then got down on her knees and gently grabbed my cheeks with her hands, pulling my face so that it could look right at her. "You need to understand, the reason I did this is because I've been lying to you and everyone else this whole time. The real truth, the truth I've been hiding from everyone, is that I'm not a precog."

I think if I'd known Helen better I might have been more shocked at this revelation. Instead it was Vectress and Nuetronia who took the brunt of this revelation. "That can't be true!" Vectress said loudly. "There's no way. You've been having visions for years and they've never been wrong!"

Helen turned towards Vectress then. "No, I didn't see the future, I read about it."

"What?" Vectress said, confused.

"You see, I'm not a precog, I'm a time-traveller."

We all froze when Helen revealed that. For her part Helen just kept talking. "You have to understand. I studied every case file the League had generated, memorizing all the most important events, the ones where we just managed to save the day, where things could have gone so wrong if we hadn't been in just the right place at just the right time. Then I came back and faked having visions. But none of the visions were real, they were just my knowledge of what had already happened. The funny part is, everything I did, I did it to get you to this point, on this ship, with Vectress and Nuetronia as your slaves."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because if I didn't, I'd never be born."

Born? "You mean..."

Helen smiled. "Hi dad," she said.

Nuetronia heard this and jumped up, grabbing Helen to pull her into a big hug. "This is so wonderful!" she shouted. "I have a daughter!"

Helen chuckled hearing that, "Not exactly. I mean, you always treated me like I was your daughter, but you're not my biological mother."

"So that means..." Vectress said while pointing at herself.

Helen turned towards Vectress now before replying, "Hi mom."

After everything that I had just learned, I was feeling completely numb, as though my brain was protecting itself by just not letting me feel anything anymore. "So what happens now," I asked in an almost monotone.

"Well, We're stuck on this ship for the next month, so what I'm going to do is get out of your way so that you and your new harem can enjoy yourselves without my interference."

With that Helen turned and walked out the door. However, just before she left she turned around and said, "Oh, I almost forgot. If you two are having trouble convincing dad to go along with this, you might want to check out cargo bay 2-C."

With that she finally left. Vectress stood stock still for a moment before a smirk appeared on her face. She looked over at Nuetronia, who was still processing what Helen had told us and said, "Hey Nuetronia."

When Nuetronia turned towards her she continued. "I'm going to go check out Cargo Bay 2-C. While I'm doing that, why don't you keep Master company."

Vectress then quickly exited the room. Nuetronia for her part simply turned towards me with a shy smile before saying, "It seems we are alone now Master."

I'll spare you the details of what happened next. All I'll say is that I was stuck on a ship alone with two of the most beautiful and powerful superheroines on Earth, both desperate to please me in any way possible and I was very weak willed. By the time we got to Earth, I was hooked on both of them and I wasn't about to give them up now.

In the end we decided to just go with the bullshit story we'd sold the whole planet of Larnar on about me having some strange genetic code that Emperor Zagron wanted. When Nuetronia was discovered to be pregnant shortly after we got back, it became the perfect excuse to keep the relationship going.

Vectress was obviously harder, especially once she finally got pregnant. We ended up going with an official story of us both getting very drunk one night and doing something we shouldn't have. Nuetronia then came in and forgave us both, mostly based on the idea that in her culture, it was considered perfectly fine for her best friend to sleep with her husband (oddly enough, that wasn't actually a lie, her culture has some really weird ideas about sex), though the rules of this state that any child of that union has to be adopted by the husband.

So Vectress 'decided' to follow Nuetronia's customs and when she gave birth, she gave up parental rights so you could be adopted by Nuetronia and I. It seriously hurt Vectress' reputation, not to mention tanking what rep I had developed by that point as well, but frankly, none of us really cared anyway.

You've probably figured this out already, but if you haven't, then there's one question that's going through your mind, how exactly am I able to tell you about this?

Well, as it turns out, that NDA I signed has a loophole. You see, I can still talk about everything that happened there, it's just that I can only talk about it with the people who were there at the time.

That's right Anna, you're Helen, or at least, you're going to be.

That's why Helen disappeared. She didn't want to risk what might happen if the two of you were in the same place at the same time. It's also why you had to sign your name to open this document. You see, I've discovered a neat trick with my power. If the person signing the document CAN'T fulfill the contract, they can't sign it. This contract only states one thing, that the signer is you. Since no one else is you, if they attempted to sign it, they'd find themselves unable to.

As I'm writing this down now, Vectress has just walked into the room. She's currently carrying you in her arms as she's getting ready to breastfeed you. So I guess I'll sign off now, since I want to spend some time with my daughter and you've got a lot of studying to do. But don't worry, I already know you're going to pull this off.

I've been reading through Master's story and I felt that I needed to jump in to add some much needed context. There are many parts of this story that he either skipped over or described with the barest amount of description he could get away with.The reason why should be fairly simple and it has to do with sex.

Now understand, I love your father. The day he enslaved me to his will was the happiest day of my life and I've never once regretted what happened. However when it comes to sex Master can be a bit....prudish.

Honestly I blame the culture he grew up in. You've all been raised from birth to view sex as something inherently shameful, instead of as a beautiful way to connect with another being. Why on my planet the art of properly pleasing your sexual partner is considered a required course in education and it wouldn't even occur to us to hide our sexual history.

However I've been learning that I need to respect your culture, no matter how strange it may be. As a result I've decided to lock my perspective on what happened away under another signature lock. If you don't want to read this, you can simply skip it and go straight to the mission itself. However I seriously suggest you read my account of what happened. It's incredibly important and without it, I'm seriously worried you won't be able to succeed in this mission at all. So while I won't force you, I will beg you. Please, read the next document.