I Never Saw It Coming...

As my original English-speaking server approached, I already had it in my hand. I took a sip as he looked at me with confusion. He recognized I didn't order it and it was for another table, assuring me it wouldn't be on the tab, but I told him it was no worry, I'd pay for it. I drank it slowly, feeling the alcohol fill my veins. "See, I can have a glass of wine. I can have a beer or two, it's no big deal." For a while after, it wasn't a big deal. I figured if I removed myself from the other temptations, it wouldn't be a problem to have a couple of drinks here and there. A couple of more days, a few more beers, and I left Bangkok with renewed confidence.

I spent another few months touring Thailand, several weeks in Myanmar, then through Bangladesh, and settled into India. My drinking was measured and my whore-mongering non-existent. A year after leaving Thailand I ran through Egypt, ultimately finding myself quite homesick after being abroad for 2 years. Talking to Dom more and more regularly, she advised that maybe it was time to come back to the States and settle down. Not settle down in the traditional sense, but rather settle down as in returning to a more normal type of life. My nomadic adventures were wonderful (mostly), but I needed some permanence. I needed friends. I needed a life. I needed a return to some sort of regular routine. It had been 6 years since the accident and it was time for me to get on with my life.

I walked into the airport and booked a flight to Miami. Meagan and I had always joked that when we were done with life, we'd go die in Florida like everyone else. Having felt as if I had died long ago, it seemed fitting. I knew little about Florida, but figured with all the hubbub about Miami, Mickey Mouse, and all that, it might not be a terrible place to start a new life. On my flight I met my first friend since Dom.... well, friends. Lauren and Patrick were just a bit younger than me, still in their 20's, and returning from their honeymoon. They were intrigued with my travels, but I kept my full story close as they wondered how I could afford to travel, not work, and still survive. I blew it off just telling them I sold my house and quit my job, but it was time to get back to the real world.

Pat and Lauren were great. He was a giant guy, doughy, gamer type with messy hair and a hilarious personality. He was incredibly personable and made off-color wisecracks constantly. Lauren was cute, tall, lean and athletic, with a bubbly demeanor and the gift of gab. We all barely slept on that 20-hour flight, laughing and annoying all the stuffy travelers around us. By the time we landed they had convinced me I should at least try out living near them just north of Fort Lauderdale. Pat all but guaranteed me a job with his logistics company and I played along like I actually needed the opportunity. They recommended an apartment complex not too far from their house and we set about meeting up in a couple of weeks after I settled in.

The apartment was a major step up from the shithole I had left in California. I spent that first week ordering furniture, coordinating deliveries, and buying a new car. That second week I just drove around, texting with Pat and Lauren for advice on good places to eat and things to see in the area. Like clockwork, I was at their house that weekend for a small gathering of close friends. We played board games and had a few drinks, but I sensed something dark growing inside of me as the evening progressed. I noticed my buzz increasing and my cantankerous comments flowing more freely so I excused myself just before midnight. That should have been a clue of things to come.

I apologized to them the next day and they just chalked it up to being overwhelmed by the newness of everything and maybe a few too many drinks. I told myself that was it, but really, I hadn't dealt with myself properly ever since leaving for Europe. I was a ticking timebomb of self-destruction just waiting for a trigger. A few too many drinks was that first one, but I found as I tried to live a normal life, more were just on the horizon. We all hung out a few more times over that first month and all seemed to be going pretty well from the outside. On the inside my mind was churning through the last portion of my life and unbeknownst to me, I was spiraling.

Having infinite money, nothing to do, and nowhere to go, I found myself returning to the same few restaurants almost every day. Little greasy spoon for breakfast, one of two local eateries for lunch, and then dinner at a dive bar that had surprisingly good food near the beach. One evening we agreed to dinner at a nice Mexican place. They blindsided me with a pretty little blond friend of theirs, also single, and hopes of some matchmaking. I was immediately uncomfortable as they introduced Erica. We ordered drinks, discussed the menu, and by the time the food came, I was asking about the 2-for-1 beer special in an attempt to quiet my demons. I made my second order when the waiter came mid-meal to check on us and as they cleared the table, I ordered another. We all sat and talked as I drowned myself.

Erica excused herself to the restroom and Lauren asked if I was ok. I was drunk at this point and totally boiled over. I got so angry I cursed at them with tears in my eyes, ultimately raising my voice into some gibberish about 'losing everything' and stormed out, nearly knocking Erica over as she returned the table. I pounded the steering wheel and screeched out of the parking lot, speeding down the road and screaming into the air. I passed my apartment, passed everything I knew, and ended up on the highway. I drove and drove until my anger subsided and my regret completely filled me. I pulled off on a random exit into some little beach town, stopping at the gas station to call Pat.

He picked up the phone, half angry, but half concerned. I spilled my guts. I told him everything. I sobbed in front of that gas station for 20 minutes telling him the graphic details I had long tried to forget. When we hung up, I felt empty. I felt nothing. I was drunk, disoriented, and in desperate need of a distraction. I hopped out of the car, went inside, and grabbed a couple of tall boys from the cooler. I placed them in the cupholder and started driving. I drove aimlessly, slurping the malt liquor and cranking anything I could on the radio. I was halfway through my second beer when I came upon a seedy little strip club next to a shopping center.

Inside I was brought back to my savagery in Bangkok. I felt disdain for everyone in the place. I ordered a beer and a shot at the bar and turned to watch the dangerously skinny girl in a neon green G-string on the stage half-ass it on the pole. I looked around at the handful of girls sitting in their tiny outfits, staring at their phones and the sad fucks drinking alone and tossing dollars at the girl on the stage. I felt disgusted with them. I felt disgusted with myself as I realized I was one of them. Just as I was about to leave, an attractive older girl in an orange bikini approached with a smile on her face. She sat on the barstool beside me, obviously sticking out her chest and ass, trying to entice me.

I felt the fury burning inside of me as she tried to seduce me into a table dance. She was pretty, but obviously beyond her years in stripper terms. I'd guess she was early 40's. She had a decent body, pretty lean, ok ass, and man-mades that could almost fool you into believing she was 10 years younger. She poured it on for a couple of minutes -- how I wasn't the usual 'old guy' who would come in here and how she thought I was cute. All that bullshit. Finally, I snapped, leaned in close with vitriol coursing through my body, telling her that if she wanted to fuck me, we should leave right now. Of course, she "wasn't that type of girl" but quickly began negotiating cause "I couldn't afford her anyway." The two Ben Franklins in my wallet said otherwise.

Five minutes later we were in the back of my car, highlighted by the neon lights of the marquee, and I was using her head to jerk myself off. She started off well enough, rubbing me through my pants before pulling me out and taking me into her mouth. However, as I felt myself growing angrier, I grabbed her hair and slammed it down so hard my cock bent as it hit the back of her throat. At first, she seemed to enjoy it. 'Mmmm' and all that. But as I continued, my intensity increased and soon she was gagging hard, drool spilling from her mouth and tears smearing the makeup down her face. I jammed my dick as deep into her throat as possible as I pumped my frustrations down her throat. I shoved the money into her face and dragged her out of the car as she attempted to clean herself up. Stuffing the money into her pocket, she called me an asshole as I zipped my fly and got back into the car.

Minutes later I found myself in an empty parking lot alongside the beach. I took my warm, half empty beer and sat next to the crashing waves, frustrated and disgusted with myself. I relived the evening over and over again as I stoically stared at the moonlit surf. I finished up my beer, tossed the can behind me and laid down, the sound of the ocean slowly lulling me to sleep. The brutal sun rising across the water woke me up and I returned to my car, still half drunk. I plugged the phone into the charger and pulled up the GPS. I had several texts from Pat and Lauren that I ignored until I was almost home. They were both apologetic about the blind date and wanted to make sure I was ok. I texted back that it wasn't a problem and I was ok.

I kept my distance after that, settling in to my new routine. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and back to the apartment or the beach for a while before going to bed. I had a few drinks, nothing crazy, but just enough to take the edge off. Over the course of a few weeks those few drinks came earlier and stayed later, often bringing more friends. I wasn't angry as much as I was bored. Pat and Lauren continued to reach out and I would respond, but kept declining. One evening, a Saturday I think, I happened to come back home just as Lauren was walking away from my door. We spoke briefly outside before I invited her in. We cracked beers and talked casually before she finally admitted that she was really worried about me. Another couple of beers the conversation turned away from me and onto her and Pat.

Apparently, they were having problems. He ran into an ex shortly after they returned from their honeymoon and she suspected something was amiss. A few days prior it came to a head when she snooped through his texts and found they had been talking regularly. There was no smoking gun, but she suspected he was cheating with her. Another couple of beers and I was telling her she should talk to him, but she was too angry. Next thing you know we were drinking shots and pretending not to be thinking about our woes, current and past.

We got a solid buzz on and I found myself back in that dark place alongside a vulnerable, attractive woman. I wasn't angry like I had been, but I was vindictive none-the-less. We were getting flirty, getting loose, and I began thinking of the things I would love to do to her. I sat across from her on the couch, fantasizing about what she looked like naked as we got silly, giggling and making suggestive comments. She got up, asked if I wanted a beer, and disappeared into the kitchen. Alone with my nasty thoughts, I fooled myself into believing everything she suspected about Pat and told myself that it would only be fair for her to have a little fling.

When she returned, I motioned for her to sit next to me on the couch and she obliged. I told her that I thought Pat would be nuts to cheat on her and caressed her silky knee, slowly moving up to her thigh as she talked about how angry she was. My touch was not discouraged as she grew more animated. Our eyes locked several times and the tension grew between us. As I polished off my beer, I said we needed to do something fun instead of wasting our buzz on being angry and bummed out. She asked if I wanted to go out and I said I'd rather play a game or something. I didn't have cards or any board games or anything, so I offered up a silly game of 'marry, fuck, kill.' We did a few rounds of celebrities and politicians before stalling out.

It was definitely a shock to her when I asked if she wanted to play something a little more dangerous, like 'truth or dare.' She giggled nervously and grinned wide as I told her we didn't have to do anything real crazy, just silly stuff like take a shot or tell your darkest fantasy, pushing the envelope and hoping to open the door. Her face went red and she chugged the rest of her beer, asking if I needed another one and practically jumping off the couch and running to the kitchen. I thought I had blown it, but as she returned and handed me my beer she offered, "Truth or Dare..."

Back and forth we went with truths, becoming increasingly suggestive as we went. Fantasy, best, biggest, and eventually she asked me if I was attracted to her. Affirming her instincts, I told her that I thought she was beautiful and incredibly sexy. She blushed as she presented me with my turn. Dare.

After a few nervous moments she asked me to take off my shirt. I stood in front of her and did a silly little dance, pulling the shirt over my head and tossing it into her face. She laughed and commented that she liked my body. Her turn. Dare.

I was so excited I had to hold myself back from asking her to fuck me right then and there. I kept it safe, saying we should take another shot. I think she breathed a sigh of relief and quickly moved to the kitchen, returning with our shot glasses and the bottle of tequila.

It didn't take long before a series of dares had her just in her strapless black bra and silky purple panties, with me down to my boxer briefs. The next step was show me, but she went back to truths and I followed suit. We were drunk, obviously horny, but she was reluctant and I was wary of ruining the moment. Besides, it was totally hot sitting there next to her sexy toned body. She had hips, thighs, ass, and nice full breasts teased with tan lines giving away the style of bikini she wore. A couple of rounds of truth really degraded quickly. 'What did you first think of me' and 'who's your celebrity crush' threated to kill all of the momentum. I had no choice, but to up the ante.

Dare.

She hemmed and hawed, struggling to find a balance and not go completely crazy. Another shot and she picked truth. "You said you liked my body; would you like to touch me?" I teased. She beamed as she dropped her grinning face into her hands and giggled, "Oh my god" a couple of times before looking back up at me, face beet red, and nodded. I slapped her hand away as she reached for my chest, wagging my finger and telling her that only dares can prompt actions, truths are just words. We both laughed and she shook her head as she took a drink from her beer, slowly nodding and fluttering her eyes as she swallowed her mouthful. My turn again.

Dare.

"Can I touch you?" she panned, eyes darting back and forth between my face and my chest. I stood up in front of her, my cock swelling in my tight underwear, and guided her hands to my chest. Her face was flush and she bit her bottom lip as her fingertips made contact. She lightly grazed across and then down my chest, over my stomach before flopping back against the couch and exhaling an audible 'wooo.' I smiled and stood my ground, hoping she would return to me as I began drooling in my underwear. Her turn.

Dare.

She cackled when I asked her to give me a lap dance. She played it off for a few seconds, acting like I was joking and like she wasn't sure. At this point, I think we both knew where things were going... we had for a while. "Oh my god, this so embarrassing," she said, again cupping her face into her hands. I just laid back into the corner of the couch and splayed myself out, raised my eyebrows, and nodded for her to get up. She leaned forward, grabbed her beer and slammed it, immediately standing up in front of me. Her perfect body jiggled just right as she awkwardly began gyrating, slowly spinning around at my feet.

"Ummm," I asked, "do you know what a lap dance is?"

"Oh god, is it that bad?" she said, her hands covering her face and pushing back her long dark hair as it spilled in front of her.

"No, you're perfect, but a lap dance involves a lap," I quipped, nodding towards the hard bulge threatening to break through the thin spandex fabric.

Face in her hands again she started muttering to herself inaudibly. I ruined it. I knew it. I sat forward and touched her elbow, telling her it was just a dumb game and she didn't have to do anything she felt uncomfortable with. She softened, removing her hands and revealing a big, mischievous grin. In one motion she poked me back into the couch and lifted her leg over mine, propping it up on the cushion next to me. I stared at the plump lips held tight in her satin panties as she twisted her hips overtop of me, trying to work up the courage to actually make contact. For several seconds I was mesmerized by her gorgeous body, barely able to contain my urge to reach out and snatch her to me.

Her foot slipped from the edge of the couch and she dropped to her knees on the cushion, straddling my leg and bringing her body close to mine, reaching past me to brace herself against the wall. It took all the strength I had to not take her right then and there as she continued her slow, sultry tease. I could feel her heavy breathing as the knee between my legs made contact with my manhood. Her other leg slid up further, pressing against my outer thigh as her body came within an inch of my face. Just as I thought she was going to completely lose control, she sighed heavily and stood back up, stepping back to the loveseat beside us and laying across it, wide open for my eyes to consume.

"You know there's contact, right?" I smirked, hoping desperately for her to return to me.

"I guess you're going to have to show me then," she suggested.

"That sounds like a dare, but what if I choose truth," I grinned.

"My loss, I guess," she pouted, sitting back up and closing her legs.

"I think it would be a little unfair for me to give you a proper lap dance when mine wasn't quite right," I teased.

She smiled and stood up as I reached for her hand. I pulled her in front of me, guiding her between my legs, directing her to turn around in front of me. She resisted at first then turned around with her nice plump ass, panties pulled halfway up her crack, right in front of my face. I reached up and tugged on her hips, directing her to lower herself into my lap. She slowly bent forward, still hesitating a bit before settling onto my lap, my hard cock directly between her perfect cheeks. My hands glided up her sides as I leaned forward, wrapping them around her tight body and pulling her back to my chest. I palmed her stomach and caressed her ribs as she wrapped her arm around my head and began slowly grinding into me.

My cock ached for her body as she gyrated onto it, stroking me effortlessly with every motion. Both of my hands began pushing her bra up off her breasts and I cupped her overflowing handfuls, breathing heavily into her ear. Running my hand dwon her stomach, still holding one of her tits, I slid to the front of her panties, toying with the waistband. She writhed on top of me breathlessly as I began nibbling her ear and pinching her nipple, still trying to slip my fingers between her legs. She worked me perfectly, but refused to spread her legs for me so my hands roamed over the rest of her body, taking time to tease the top of her inner thighs.

I felt like my cock was going to explode as her outstanding ass taunted me. After a few minutes she sat forward and stood up, turning around to face me. She was flush, panting, and staring down at me with a stoic expression I couldn't discern. I reached up, held both of her hands, and gently pulled her to me. As if she was still contemplating what was happening, she slowly allowed her hands to meet my shoulders, leaning forward and kissing me lightly as I stretched to reach her ass. Again, she stood up, as if she was still considering her actions. Within seconds she was dropping to her knees in front of me, kissing my chest and pressing her exposed tits against my stiffness. I pulled on her bra, twisting it around I could unfasten it. Her hands traced my chest, down my abs, and around my barely sheathed hard-on as I threw her bra to the side.