I Wanna Mommy fo' Chwismus

No mention of their relationship. No mention of how she had helped him. No mention of his feelings for her! Eve didn't know what she had expected but she certainly would have appreciated at least a little more personal connection. She was able to smile when he was done and before long, they were all elbow deep in turkey, dressing, yams and green beans.

After a wonderful meal, the women tidied up and fortunately, neither Ellen nor Louise asked her any probing questions. Once the football game was over, the grandparents departed, taking left-overs with them. Mandy was obviously exhausted and by seven p.m. was dragging herself off to bed.

Finally, there were the two of them.

"Wine?"

"No thanks, I had one with dinner and I'll need to drive home pretty soon."

"You can stay awhile if you want to."

"Thank you but I have a wicked paper due on Monday and want to rest tonight so I can tackle it fresh in the morning."

"Oh, that's too bad but I get it. Say, thanks for coming over. Had fun."

"Me, too. At least the grandmas didn't put me through the wringer."

"Wringer? What do you mean?"

"Oh, I don't think I ever told you but at Mandy's birthday, they pinned me down in the kitchen and asked about you and me."

"What'd you tell them?"

"They wanted to know if we were 'seeing' each other, you know, romantically."

"What'd you say?"

"I didn't want to discuss our relationship with them mainly because I wasn't sure what it was, so I deflected and said we were only friends. Your mom spoke to me privately and said she thought she saw a spark between us and that she approved."

"She did, huh?"

"Uh-huh."

There were a few seconds of silence when Eve decided to pursue the topic some more. "Cam, I wasn't sure what our relationship was then and now I want to know: What is it, anyway? Our relationship?"

"I, uh, I don't, well, uh, do you want a name for it?"

"It doesn't have to have a name but I'd like a sense of what we are doing here."

"Eve, you are the best thing to come into my life lately. Before you, I was a wreck and you've given me some reason for hope..." His voice trailed off.

"But...?"

"But, I, uh, I guess I'm still not completely over Suzanne and I..."

"Cam, you'll never get over her, not one hundred percent. Is she, is her memory preventing you from moving on?"

"I don't know, Eve. It's complicated, it's frustrating. I'm sorry but I'm just a fucking mess."

"OK, let me tell you something. I love Mandy. She lights up my life whenever I see her. She's a real jewel."

"Yeah, she is, isn't she?"

"And she needs some stability in her life. And she was partly right back then: she wanted a mommy for Christmas when the real issue was her truly needing one.

"But I'm not here talking only about her. I'm talking about us, our relationship. I'm going to tell you something, something which may or may not surprise you. Cam, I have been waiting for the day you tell me you love me because I've fallen crazy in love with you. I love you. I want you. I want to be with you, with you two. But I'm beginning to see that you haven't the same feelings for me and..."

"Eve, I do like you, I like you a lot. Tons. I'm just not sure if I can ever truly love another."

"I get it that you had a great marriage. I get it that you loved her, that you still love her. I understand. But I am not trying to get rid of her memories when I say I love you. Surely your heart is big enough to love both of us. Isn't it?"

"I don't know, I just don't know."

"Cam, I hope you don't think I'm some kind of a pushy bitch who is demanding a ring from you. I'm not. But what I am asking is simply for some kind of a sign that there's a possibility of a long-term future for us. Because if there isn't, then it is best we part now, for our sake as well as Mandy's."

Cam sat there staring at her making no attempt to talk. After a long pause, she went on, "Honey, it looks like we need to cool it between us. It's too painful for me and the longer I'm with you, the harder it will be on Mandy if or when this doesn't work out. If you ever figure things out in your mind and want me in your life, in your lives, you know where to reach me. But I can't wait forever. And though sex with you is fantastic, the best imaginable, I won't be just your friend with benefits in the meantime. Take care, Cam."

"No, Eve, please don't do this to me, to Mandy. How will I explain it to her?"

"I don't know, Cam, I just don't know. Maybe tell her I'm super busy at college right now, which won't be far from the truth. But please tell her she's the best little girl on the planet."

As she turned to leave, he came up to her and held her tightly in his arms, arms which felt so good but still somehow lacked something, something she couldn't truly put her finger on. Slowly, she pulled herself free and stepped through the door and out of their lives.

The next few weeks were horrible. She barely functioned, but managed to keep her head above water and eke out some decent grades. But she was devastated, particularly when he didn't try to communicate like she had hoped he would. Her life seemed suddenly so empty but she knew it was for the best in the long run, wasn't it? Or had she made a colossal mistake by pushing him too hard?

-----

It was midafternoon on December the twenty-third, the last day at Santa's village. Eve looked at the line of excited children and their weary parents knowing her shift would be over in less than an hour when Gretchen would take over until the village closed down that evening for the season. If she hadn't had already promised the mall staff she'd be an elf again, Eve would have looked for other, better-paying work during the holidays. But she was a woman of her word and decided to don her Evie outfit for one final season. At least she would graduate in June and have a real job soon.

Remembering how she had met Mandy and Cameron the previous year at Santa's Village brought renewed sadness to her. She hadn't heard from them, from him since Thanksgiving and she missed both of them terribly but she knew in her heart of hearts, it was for the best. Cam needed more time before he could move on and find a new person in his life. Although Eve had fallen in love with him and merely thinking about him opened a raw pain in her heart, even more upsetting was knowing how painful her leaving must have been for little Mandy. She hoped Mandy would come to understand things some day and realize though it was painful for all three of them, it was the best way forward for Cam.

As she went through her duties, she had to keep reminding herself to be cheery with the youngsters as they came up to her. She would get their name and repeat it so a tiny microphone on her lapel would broadcast it into Santa's ear bud. When the child would go up to him, he could call them by name. Most of the kids were in awe that he 'knew' them and their names, adding to the magic of the moment.

As she leaned over to ask a young boy his name, her eye caught a glimpse of Mandy a few places in line behind him! Her voice caught as she repeated his name before leading him to Santa. She glanced back only to see, yes, it was Mandy standing there impatiently. Eve wondered if Mandy would recognize her. The clown white face, the pigtails and the pointed fake ears did make her look different but still, she knew Mandy was a smart little girl and would probably see through the disguise.

Her heart beat faster and her nerves caused her to shake as Mandy moved up in the line. Eve glanced around the village looking for Cam but he was nowhere to be seen. 'How could he have left her here?' she wondered while thinking he must not have wanted to face Eve so he stepped away for a few minutes.

Then Mandy was there at the front of the line clutching in her little fist a small green and red gift bag.

"Hi, I'm Evie, Santa's elf. Who are you?"

"I'm Mandy," giggled the girl.

"OK, Mandy, what are you going to ask Santa for Christmas?" she asked, fearing another meltdown.

"It's secret."

"Secret, huh?" Eve answered, surprised Mandy's use of the letter R was correct but relieved at the answer. "Well, you tell Santa and I'm sure he will try to bring it to you on Christmas."

"Ho, Ho, Ho, Mandy. Come on up here and tell Santa what you want for Christmas."

Mandy leaned over to whisper something in Santa's ear.

"You want to do what?"

'Uh-oh,' thought Eve, remembering what happened the previous year.

More whispering and some giggles followed.

"Well, Mandy, usually we give toys to good girls and boys but it's the holiday season, so sure, you can give her a gift."

Mandy turned to Eve saying, "Daddy and me want you to have this." She held out the bag to Eve.

"Uh, Daddy...?"

"Yes, Daddy and me. Open it."

"Thank you, Mandy, but maybe I'll wait until later when I'm not so busy."

"Open it. Please!"

"Yeah, open it," called out the boy next in line and soon several others joined in.

"OK, everybody, I'll open it." Out of the corner of her eye she noticed Santa had produced a phone and was aiming the camera at her. 'What is going on?' she wondered as her hand slid into the bag touching a card. After nervously tearing the envelope open, she pulled out the card showing a family opening gifts around a Christmas tree. She read the first simple message inside:

DEer EEv,

PLees be mi MoMee

I Luv U

Mandee

Eve's first thought was how much Mandy had learned in the last few months. She had gone from unable to read at all to now writing a message that was fully understandable. She was so proud of the little girl. Then she read the next note.

Dearest Eve,

I knew within moments of your leaving Thanksgiving that I was an absolute fool; a fool who did not completely realize until you left what an amazingly wonderful woman you are. More importantly, this fool realized over the next weeks how much I had fallen in love with you and how much I missed you. As the days went by, I suffered being without you more and more. And Mandy has wanted you and needed you more than you can imagine. We both love you and want you in our lives forever. Please consider this most unorthodox method of communicating with you to be our way of asking if you will make us the happiest little family around by agreeing to marry me and by being Mandy's new mom.

Love, Your Cameron

Stunned, she glanced around the mall. No Cameron!

"There's a present inside. Open it! Open it!" Mandy cried with the impatience of an excited, little girl.

"OK, I will. I will." She pulled out a tiny package wrapped in gold foil. After tearing off the little bow and wrapping, she opened the box. A beautiful diamond on a gold solitaire shimmered in the lights of the village. Santa's camera clicked as the boy at the front of the line asked, "What is it?"

"It's a ring."

"Who gave it to you?"

"Mandy and her daddy did," she smiled as tears started dripping down her face. He did want her! He did love her, after all! She reached out pulling Mandy close to her as she searched the area for Cam.

And there he was, stepping out from behind a pillar. God, he was so handsome! And she could tell he was nervous, anxiously waiting for an answer. There was no doubt in her mind she would say 'yes,' no doubt she would marry him and get a wonderful, sweet child as part of the bargain.

Looking down at Mandy, she pulled the ring from the box before handing it to her. "Yes, Mandy, I'll be your mommy. Will you put the ring on me? Here, this finger."

Mandy slid the ring on, Eve picked her up in a big hug and called out, "Yes, Cam, you crazy, crazy man, yes, I'll marry you!" Cameron leapt over the picket fence and joined them in front of Santa, enveloping them in a family hug as the crowd cheered and Santa's camera clicked.

"Did you have to do this in front of everyone?" she laughed through her tears of happiness.

"It was Mandy's idea. I just had to get Santa on board. He's sending me the pics."

Remembering where she was and her job responsibilities, she turned to the line of children, "I'll be right with you, kids."

"Nope. You are relieved of duty for the rest of the day," came a voice from behind her, a voice she recognized as Gretchen, the elf on the next shift, "I'm taking over now."

"You planned this all out?" she laughed.

"Yup. Sure glad you said 'yes' and didn't embarrass me and Mandy."

"How could I say 'no' to the nicest two people on the planet? Oh, you two, I love you so much. I can't wait to join your family."

"Even with Louise? And my mom?"

"Of course. Looks like I get two new mommies in the bargain."

"And I get a mommy for Christmas, too!" cried out Mandy to the renewed cheers of the entire Santa village.

"Don't you mean 'Chwismus'?"

"No, Silly, it's Christmas. And you're the best Christmas present ever!"

-----

Trionyx -- December 2023

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