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Click hereSometimes I feel very silly to find how shocked I am at how bad every day parents can be. And I don't mean those parents that you see on the news, who have beaten, tormented or abused their children -- although of course those parents are terrible... however, I'm talking about your run of the mill BAD parents. The ones who don't want to put any effort into parenting, they want the world to do it for them and they blame everything their children do wrong on the world.
These are the parents who, right now, are up in arms about a website called Miss Bimbo. I'm sorry... do you not have ANY control over your kids? Were you not aware that your 8 year old was checking out a site called Miss Bimbo? Instead of calling for the site to be taken down, screaming obscenities about the kinds of people who would allow such a site on the internet, go take a look in the mirror at the irresponsible, ignorant, lazy-ass, bad parent who can't even monitor, much less control, their child.
Ok, granted, kids are going to get around some of the rules and regulations you put down for them... but part of being a human being -- much less a parent -- is learning that you CAN'T control everything. All you can do is your best. However, your best shouldn't include that everyone else around you change and be forced to follow the controls that you think should be set for your 8 year old.
This is the same kind of thing with Myspace and Facebook... parents blaming the sites for their kid's getting into trouble on them. I'm sorry, but in this day and age if your kid is STUPID enough to keep their page open to ALL viewers, to actually make friends on the internet, and then go MEET them without your knowledge... both of you are sheltered and haven't been watching enough TV. And you need to sit your ass down with your kid and actually communicate about the dangerous people that are out there because you obviously haven't done your job. If you're worried about it, you should be MONITORING YOUR KID'S INTERNET ACTIVITIES. The rest of us shouldn't have to do it for you.
And then you might see that your questionably-retarded child has not only made her main picture a half-naked, porn-posed booty shot, but that she has ALL of her information laid out for the entire internet community to see. And no privacy screenings. Oh, and has accepted the friend request of every single person that has sent one. Now, I don't think that anyone deserves to be put in any kind of dangerous situation, or ever have anything bad happen to them... but when such little common sense is put into use, you have to wonder what is WRONG with these kids?! Personally, yeah, I blame their parents.
Of course, the parents don't want it to be their fault, so they blame the world. The evil internet. Not the fact that they'd rather sit and watch American Idol instead of paying attention to what their teenager is doing online. Not the fact that they never really talked to their kid about sex, drugs, alcohol, or the dangerous people that are out there in the world, especially the online world. Now, some of these kids will figure things out for themselves, true... the vast majority of us stumble through adolescence with very little but the help of our friends.
Heck, I'm the one who set up the internet password FOR my parents... but they still kept pretty ok track of what I was doing online. Fortunately I'm out of the house now, but my mom will still walk in on my brother -- who is over 20 -- and peer at whatever he's looking at on the computer... that's the price of living at home. Parents who pay attention, who have seen his myspace page (and through his, mine unfortunately... but at least I have the common sense to keep the world off of it by making it private to all but my friends... and ONLY accepting friend requests from people I actually know in the real world!), and who know what's going on in his life.
Those are the kind of parents that we call GOOD. They try hard. They pay attention. They communicate. Do their kids still get into trouble? Well of course we do. Things aren't perfect. The world isn't perfect. But when we get into trouble, we know where to go... we know what to do... and neither of us has placed ourselves in harm's way.
As risqué as any picture I might have up on the internet is, it wouldn't have been while I was living in my parent's house. That would've never been allowed. My parents didn't even let me get an instant messenger on the computer until I was 16. And then, believe me, I had to put up with them coming in and asking who every single person I happened to be chatting with was.
I'm just sick and tired of these lazy parents, these BAD lazy parents, blaming everyone else for the stupid, dangerous online antics of their children. It's called firewalls. It's called not giving them your credit card information so that your ten year old can actually play on Miss Bimbo. Looking at their myspace/facebook pages and possibly even having the passwords to them. Don't just let them run amuck and then blame everyone else.
The person really to blame is looking at you in the mirror every morning when you brush your teeth next to your child, but don't bother to find out what they're doing with their day. Reflected in your TV screen while you watch your evening shows and ignore the clicking of computer keys in the next room.
I don't know if parents today are really all that different... I mean, you hear about parents in the past blaming various others for their children's misdeeds -- rock and roll music, video games, rap music, etc... But seriously. The internet is a dangerous place. On the other hand, it's also not that hard to monitor (and might I say, neither is the video games that your kid buys... just look at them and find out what they're about if that worries you). And while things will slip through your notice, yes, that's life. But at least you'll have done something to make your kid safer... instead of counting on the rest of the world to do your job for you.
Because, believe me, none of us care as much as you should.
Well said! Parents - Your kids have enough friends. Be their PARENT and when they grow up, THEN they'll be your friend. Right now tell them "no" and keep them safe until they learn to make informed decisions on their own.
I remember saying to my son I didnt really want him watching power rangers because I thought it glorified violence (and it was dumb) and he said "Mum its just a television show. Its not real you know" he was only 6 years old. He sure told me and I realised that I had raised him to be a discerning and considerate media consumer and I patted myself on the back for having such a great kid. He is 18 now and still the best and wisest person I know.
a rant, but one that's 100% true. Wish I could post that as the Windows background on every single computer.
OMG, exactly what I've been saying for the last decade! This piece hits the nail on the head, and describes about 60-70 percent of parents I run across. Well written indeed!
Such a true rant. As a teacher I see some scary things and just want to shake the parents silly.
Right on Girl. You were lucky enough to have good, responsible, loving parents. Would that every parent could be that way. It's called loving your kids.