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All Comments on 'Jack and Tina: The Train Ride'

by JipsyRose

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5thRing5thRingalmost 2 years ago

I like the premise. The outfit is a little hard to visualize as anything inconspicuous. You made a POV change from 3rd, to 1st, than quickly back to 3rd.

I don't love that it's so short a story, but I'm not someone who believes they always need to be multiple pages.

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userJipsyRose@JipsyRose
5 Stories
15 Followers
Born and bred in the USA, east coast. Divorced after 26 years together. Learning how to date again. Have been writing since I was about 13 years old. First story was a collab with a friend. It was a non-consent story. Had a teacher read it (not sure why) and he was blushing ba...