All Comments on 'Jack the Mechanic'

Thanks for the read.

bit wooden in places, but nice concept.

As though your lame story wasn't bad enough, your writing reads like listening to a foreigner speak. There is no punctuation, many grammatical and spelling errors as well as the omission of adjectives and adverbs that are needed. PLEASE, before you make another attempt at submitting something, find someone to edit your efforts. However, my suggestion would be to just avoid the effort!!!