Jon E 02

Jon E 02

"I mean, Jon E, are you sure the creek spot is available on Saturday nights then? My crew might break a thumb here or there, but we don't step on people's toes by crossing turf, so? And I meant thumbnails, of course."

"Keke, I personally updated the dedication sign with the "Lost & Ignored" crew symbol, so. Plus, I'm kind of a big deal around here because I fit right in."

"Hmm."

"Well, I fit right in, so."

"Oh, and speaking of fitting right in, paint over the catch phrase "Keke is kinky" pronto! I mean, "Keke is kooky" might fit me, but I don't know much about being kinky, so?"

[Swish, swash, swoosh, paint brush strokes, repaint]

"And put a couple of XOXO's under it."

[Diagonal swashes, circle sweep, diagonal swashes, circle sweep]

"Not that I'm your Creek Girlfriend now or anything, but cool, so I'll spread the word to my crew, which is not the newly founded "Jon E True Crew" by any stretch of the imagination, Jon E!"

[Swash, swash, swash]

Well, when you fit in so well at a place, I mean, you kind of become a big deal by default, so I stand with my statement that if I fit in, then I must be a big deal then! And to back me up, I mean, not only do I fit right in as a fem dresser, I have a Creek Girlfriend too, so.

{Clink, clink}

"Oh, I like wine coolers now, do I, Jon E?"

"Keke, don't you read blogs on Chang? The women chit chat while sipping on wine coolers and the guy's clean their teeth with rusty barn nails in between swigs of beer, so."

"And you fit in right of the middle of that then, Jon E? And just what flavor is this wine cooler with the Lavender foil seal on it? Also, Lavender is not your color if on the off chance that your undies match."

"Well, it's not easy to "just fit right in" all the time, regardless of my "big deal" status, so I may or may not run around a little. And it's Pure Passion Pleasure Fruit flavor because?????"

"Jon E, I am not your Creek Girlfriend, so run around and bat your eyes with a round of beer for the guys. (But don't give up on me.)"

Well, I already said it in the last chapter that I may or may not do things to force fit myself in, so.

"It doesn't matter that I need a bag to carry a few beers in, guys, I'm still a big deal her and I fit right in, so?"

"Johnny..."

"It's Jon E."

"Jon E, you're hardly big enough to be a big deal, but the "Lost & Ignored" crew doesn't talk down to others, so. I mean, we're going to have a serious sit down with Keke for setting all this up, but our official response is "thank you" for your service, I guess. And Jake has always been all about cheer leaders, so."

[Sis boom bah, bend him over, bend him over, rah, rah, rah]

"Also, do they come around to this side of the creek then, Jon E?"

[Ah-ahh, ah-ahh, ah, ahh, naughty boys, naughty boys, rah, rah, rah]

[Grumble, mumble, hiss, call us maybe, call us maybe, call us maybe, woo, woo, woo]

"Huh, I mean, maybe we should change our catch phrase to Jon E...."

{Whiz! Wine cooler bottle whizzes just past shoulder}

"(Oh, yeah Jon E, go ahead and pursue Keke as your Creek girlfriend then!) Anyways, what's your back story then, Jon E?"

"Oh, it's the same ole, same ole, Trent. I searched around for a place to hang out where what type of undies I wear didn't matter and then I found this spot by the creek and then I figured out how to fit in and become the big deal that I am today. And it doesn't matter that I talk to your chest either, Trent. I'm still a big deal here at the creek. So, what's your crew back story then? And I'm half afraid to ask Keke too many more questions anymore."

"Oh, well Jon E, it's was the same ole, same ole for us too. We were hanging out on the abandoned highway exit until we figured out it was only hardly used and not abandoned, so."

"So, it sounds like a certain person, not saying who, came to the rescue, which some might say was a big deal since cars at exit speed and the human body don't mix so well, I mean, huh then."

[Admit it, admit it, admit it, the fem boy is right, right, right, ooh la, la, ooh la, la, ooh la, la.]

"Ahem! Only a big deal would have their own traveling cheer team support system, so?"

[Cave, cave, cave, look at his body, body, body, sis boom bah, ugh, ugh, ugh.]

"WTF? Who teaching hand and arm motions like that in cheer then, Jon E?"

"Well, when you're a big deal and all, Trent, not only do you get the girl, you get the top squad too!"

{Whiz! Wine cooler bottle whizzes just past blonde tinted spikey hair}

[Throw the ball, throw the ball, Keke, Keke, Keke, touch down, touch down, sis boom bah.]

{Whiz, whiz, whiz, whiz, clink, clank, clink, clank}

[Ooh, ooh, ooh, that bitch has an arm, oh, oh, oh, four on ground, plop, plop, plop, plop]

Huh, so the first Saturday night of hanging out with my new crew came and went then without incidence then, huh? LOL, on our side of the creek anyways.

"Fine, Jon E, you can let Sam drive you up to the "Stop & Rob" convenience store to get some band aids, but only because some girls look cute with small "X" band aids on the foreheads. You can also casually kiss me good bye, but as your leader and not your Creek Girlfriend! And I'm not saying that because I'm afraid of where your lips will be next, so."

{Mwah}

"Fuck you, Jon E! A leader gets a cheek kiss!"

{Mwah, oomph, ummah.}

"Buy me something from the store, asshole."

[Keke, Keke, Keke, get Kinky, get Kooky, tongue tag, tongue tag, get with it, get with it, go, go, go.]

{Mwah, mwah, oomph, oomph, ummah, ow, ow.}

[Holy snap, holy snap, that was hot, hot, hot!]

"Get going."

Also, I said nothing at all at any time, so, that proves that I'm a big deal who fits right in on both sides of the street! Or the creek.

[Red rover, red rover, send those other naughty boys right over, but hurry up with those band aids.]

And it takes a true big deal to launch relationships with saying a single word.

"We just met, Sam, so?"

"And you can't say that next Saturday then, Jon E, so?"

"Hmm, okay then, just so we're on the same page then. And stop looking for my boy bulge. It's there and that's all you need to know, so?"

"Oh, I mean, Jon E, I figured that, so?"

"So, you were just calculating in your head which position you want us in so that you can bang me and stroke me off at the same time then, hmm?"

"Oh, so, do you have a problem with your Bull playing fair with then, Jon E?"

"Oh, I mean, Sam, I thought that was just a myth, but I'm rejecting the "Bull" thing. I'm too big of a deal to wear just one ankle bracelet, so, shut it and stop looking and drive!"

I mean, two things, right? I do have the appropriate bulge and he, whew, apparently doesn't know about the Fire Trails because he zipped right past each of them on the way to the "Stop & Rob" store.

"Clyde, not those bands aids! They are way too big to look cute on four cute girl's foreheads in a "X" formation!"

"Oops, my bad, Jon E! Not that I was trying to let you know that you make my band aid big, so?"

"Clyde, you're like 70!"

"Jon E, I keep telling all you Tranny's come into the store that I'm 32!"

"Oh, well, oops, my bad, Clyde."

"And by the way, Jon E, not only am I just 32, I'm Claude! My dad, the usual manager, is Clyde and he just so happens to be 70, so????"

"Oh, I mean, well, I didn't mean to rub whack him off for chips and an ice tea then last week, so?"

[Plop]

"Claude? Claude, are you breathing then?"

I mean, Sam left some money on the counter for the small band aids, so.

[X, X, X, super cute selfies, selfies, selfies, selfies, ouch, ouch, ouch, sis boom bah]

Huh? So, getting dates is just that easy then? And by dates, I mean, zing, zing, zing, the Chang replies just kept coming, coming, coming. Which may or may not be why I thought of them as dates for the cheer girls.

"Fine, you treat women well, Jon E and maybe your lips didn't end up on my step brothers lap on the way to or on the way back from the store, but..."

"Step brother? Sam? What?"

"Relax, Jon E, you passed the test."

Well, wait, um, we just met, so okay, but next weekend Sam is bringing his travel van to the creek, um, carry the one and I should just make a small "X" in the middle of my forehead with the extra band aids so that Keke doesn't miss with her "whizzing" wine cooler bottle and end my big deal time down at the creek, so, that's bad math!

{Passed, passed, passed, work both sides, work both sides, go Jon E!]

"Ahem!"

"Fine, Jon E, you passed and you're passable and I'll go all Lesbian Creek Girlfriend with you tonight, but you better be all that big of a deal then!"

Ah snap, um, Sam couldn't spy it, but it takes a decent bulge to be that big of a deal in bed, carry the two and LOL, that answer comes after we are already in the bed, so.

"Alright, I said it before, Jon E, fuck you then."

I think that's Keke's way of saying, um, alright.

"And being a "decent deal" isn't the end of the world, Jon E [mwah] and by "decent deal" I mean, alright then, you got a little game, so?"

I mean, I was naked in a bed with a pretty big deal of a female body, so I didn't exactly hear every word correctly.

"So, pick one for next time then, which you already agreed to, so?"

"Huh, what, Keke? I agreed with you that black undies are a good color for me, so?"

"And while you were all lost in "ga, ga, ga" land from having your first pussy, I explained the next time to you and you were all "anything, anything, anything" lost in what a wet dick feels like, so?"

[Got it wet, got it wet, got it wet, Jon E stud, Jon E stud, so, so, so, rah, rah, rah]

"Jon E, do those cheer leaders just live you then, hmm?"

"Um, Keke, what did I agree to then?"

[Trouble, trouble, trouble, double, double, double, oops, oops, oops]

"LOL, what they said. Hey, hey, hey, Jon E, don't move. I like you where you are. I don't do this all the time, you know."

So, a scare of a lifetime and an ego boost?

[She's safe, she's safe, she's safe, gooey wiggle, gooey wiggle, gooey wiggle, we need boyfriends!]

"(Gulp.)"

"LOL, not really, Jon E, not the next time, anyways. But per our lustful and tricky agreement, you do this to me again and lock me up tight and then just as you finish, I lock you in tight with my arms and legs and then the boyfriend of your choice, well, comes out of the shadows naked and hard and gets his!"

"(Gulp.) Keke, that only works in memes, not to mention, gulp."

"[Mwah], alright, Jon E, your friend on Chang, Dena Jaye, asked me to put the idea in your head and I did my part, but think about how tightly I could clamp you down since my thighs are more powerful than yours and how I might whimper that I'm your "Sandwich Girlfriend" and then, LOL, you can temporarily update the creeks dedication sign to read "Kinky Keke" for one night, right?"

[Double trouble, double trouble, take the bait, take the bait, hell, bite the bait, sis boom bah]

"Seriously? Do they have their own bedrooms here at your place, Jon E? Now, "fem boy" fuck me again right now, Jon E. That was pretty good and well, I'm your Creek Girlfriend, so."

[Thick thighs, thick thighs, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, do her, do her, again, again, again]

"Aye, aye, aye, I give up, I give up, I give up, work his hips, work his hips, sissy boom bah."

[Trans body, trans body, has it all, push it in, push it in, women and men beware, rah, rah, rah]

"OMG, WTF, um, ooh, oh, oh, ooh la, la, cheer team, cheer team chipping in and all, holy snap, holy snap, holy snap!"

I mean, I was there and all, you know.

[What a stride, what a stride, hump, hump, hump, go fem boy, go fem boy, go, go, go.]

"Aha, aha, aha, aha, woo, woo, ooh, ooh, oh."

[Clamp him down, clamp him down, Josh is here, clamp him hard, clamp him hard, virgin no more.]

"Woo, woo, woo yes or no, Jon E? Aha, aha, aha, it's your call, aha, aha, ooh, oh."

Well, what the hell, right? I was engaged in sex for my second time, add one amazing body clamping me down, divide all that by four members of the cheer team chipping in and multiple by Josh, who may or may not have tried to fag bang me before and well, I was helpless! Also, Josh was my video partner that the damn cheer team tried to call me out with a few paragraphs above, so.

"Okay, okay, okay, what just happened here then? And I don't mean you, Jon E. You're great, whew."

[Nerves, nerves, nerves, Josh popped off, Josh popped way to soon, and he ran, ran, ran, ran.]

Well, my old friend could have found a better place to pop off early at, but that's the same thing he did last time, so, LOL, it was still a tie.

[Own her, own her, push, push, push, you're the man, you're the man, fem or not!]

"(I'm starting to like your cheer team, Jon E.) And make those sounds."

[Ugh, ugh, ugh, ow, ow, ow, squishy, squishy, squishy, she's wet, she's wet, so wet, wet, wet!]

"Ug, ug, ug, then?"

[De-hump, de-pump, de-thrust, thrust, thrust, it's so hot, it's so hot, hot, hot, hot!]

Well, how long would you last with all that going on in the background then, hmm?"

End Jon E 02