Legal Affair

"It wasn't a date." She exclaimed.

"It will be if you tell anyone."

The following week Lydia came with me when I had a regular meeting with Valerie and Rachel. It was productive and didn't take too long. On the way back to our office Lydia looked at me and said, "You mentioned that there is someone, but she doesn't know you fancy her." I nodded.

"Is it Rachel?"

My reaction probably gave her the answer. "I thought so. She's rather lovely."

"What made you think that?"

"It was the way you reacted to each other. You said that she was straight though."

"She is."

"I'm not so sure. I think that she really likes you."

"Please keep that to yourself. Please!"

We were making progress, reports were much improved the quality of the investigations better and there were lots of calls and emails asking or our assistance and advice.

The Fiscal's were delighted and on a couple of occasions when I was in court you could see that the Deputes, Rachel and Lauren, had a command of what they were doing. Valerie was also pleased to report that the Sheriffs seemed to have greater confidence in what they were trying to achieve.

Unexpected events

A few weeks later Rachel and I met at Fanny Trollope's in Argyll Street for what had become a regular Friday evening dinner most weeks and we chatted about work and our nieces. When Rachel put down her knife and fork she went quiet. She looked up at me from beneath hooded eyes, "Helen, this may be awkward but when did you know that you were gay?"

Wow, that came unexpectedly. I cleared the last of my main course, took a sip of wine and looked over at her. "I don't know exactly, but I was about 15 when I looked in the mirror and confronted myself. It took me a few weeks of tears, fears and false starts before I spoke to Janice."

"What did she say? You're still friends so she must have been okay."

"She wasn't surprised. We spent most of that evening talking about it. I've never fancied her, I love her dearly but not as a 'lover' and she's never judged. I think my Dad knew but he never said anything. It took me more than two years before I did anything physical and within a few seconds I knew that I was right."

"Can we go somewhere quiet to talk?"

"Sure there's a nice pub at the top of Byres Road ...

"No, it might be better if we went somewhere even more private, maybe your place?"

We got the bill and our jackets but I was seriously scared, apprehensive and puzzled, not necessarily in that order. It was easy to get a taxi and within a few minutes, we were pouring more wine and sitting on my sofa.

"You were very honest just now, you always have been and I admire you for that."

"Thanks, but something is bothering you."

She stared into her glass and was trying to gather her courage. She looked up at me with those gorgeous eyes and very softly said, "I'm gay and have been since I was eighteen. That's a bit misleading." She stopped and was finding this very hard but I was speechless and that may have been the best thing right then. I said nothing.

"When I was at school I realised that I'd been taking an interest in girls rather than boys but it wasn't a huge thing, I assumed it was a fad and it faded. When I went to Uni I had a few boyfriends and sex was okay but I knew that it should be better than it was. It left me, I don't know, unsatisfied, with a feeling of, not revulsion, but that I felt unclean." She sipped her wine and I could see that she was collecting her thoughts again. I watched her closely, some of the tension had gone and her mouth had relaxed a little. Right then I wanted to go and gather her in my arms so much and tell her that it would be okay. But I knew that would probably not help her and, in the long run, me either.

She looked up at me. "One night I went dancing with a friend, from another course, and we had a fair bit to drink, actually I was pissed. Somehow we got back to her room; my inhibitions were down and so were hers. I don't remember very much until the next morning. I stared at her after I woke up struggling to work out how we'd got to be like that, I went rigid with fear and realised that we'd had sex. Then she opened her eyes and kissed me."

I stayed quiet. "It was like nothing I'd ever felt before and I kept feeling that it was wrong but wonderful. We talked and she confessed that she'd never slept with a girl before either. We put that right over the next two days, even though there was very little sleep involved. It was incredible and so much more loving and satisfying than sex with any of the guys I'd been with."

"Were you together?" I asked.

She nodded, "Aye, for about four months and something happened, I have no idea what. She just refused to speak to me. I was upset obviously but I had no one to talk to because no one else ever knew."

"That must have been a difficult time for you."

"It was, I studied harder and tried to put it behind me. The thing is I couldn't face coming out as a lesbian or gay or whatever, I was scared, just too scared. I didn't want to date guys either, so I've suppressed everything. Then my Dad became ill and I tried to support my Mum so my sexuality didn't seem to matter. My Dad's been in a Nursing home since soon after that happened but now he doesn't recognise my sister or me."

"That's very sad, about your Dad." I paused, "So what's changed now?"

"You! I've fantasised about you for months and tried to pluck up the courage to talk to you about it. I know that you fancy me, it's written all over your face. I just ..." There were tears very close to the surface and she started shaking.

Now I did put my arm around her shoulders. "Rachel it's okay. I won't judge you; I'll help if I can. We're friends remember."

"Thank you. I never intended to tell you all of this tonight but somehow it seemed to be the right thing to do. I'd like to see what happens, but I'm nervous, scared and I wouldn't blame you if trying to cope with me would be too much."

I sat thinking for a minute or two then made a decision.

"Okay, it's late, you're emotional and you've had too much to drink to talk any more or make your way home. So, you're going to call your mum and tell that you're staying here, in my spare room. I'll loan you a nightshirt, toothbrush and underwear for tomorrow and, if you still want to, we can talk more then."

"How do I know you won't try it on?" She didn't look scared, a little relieved perhaps.

"Because we both know that would be a bad idea."

I did see most of her as she undressed and knew that my fantasies and dreams were going to be more detailed from now on. She was stunning and I wanted her so badly, but not like this.

I lay in bed thinking about her. Of course, I wanted to be able to stroke her naked body and make her come but I liked her a lot and there was now at least a possibility of something other than just a good dream.

I was awake early on Saturday morning, had a quick shower, dressed and started the coffee. It was half-past eight when a sheepish looking Rachel appeared wearing the clothes I'd left for her. Her hair was pulled back with a band, she looked a bit nervous but stunning.

"Thank you for putting me to bed last night."

"That's okay. You said that you might want to talk but please don't feel that you have to."

"I said last night that I fancy you because I do. I'm scared almost to death about telling the world that I'm gay, my mother will be stunned, to say the least, my sister will be surprised too. I'm scared about everything and I'm going to feel like such a twat if you don't fancy me." She could barely look in my direction.

"When you asked me my name and age that day in court, I nearly stumbled because you took my breath away. I've fancied you ever since but as far as I knew you were straight and we were working together. Be in no doubt what you told me last night was nuclear and I'd love to drag you to my room and strip those clothes off of you."

"But ..." I could see that she looked terrified.

"But, I think that we should take our time and see how things progress. I'd like to date you for a while; rushing things might be a mistake."

She looked relieved, smiled and spoke softly. "Can I take my girlfriend out for a drink tonight then?"

"Girlfriend? That would be nice but I'm not sure how compatible we'll be so I need to check something out first."

She looked puzzled, "What's that?"

I leaned in and kissed her. She seemed a little surprised for all of ten seconds and then relaxed. I nearly forgot what I'd just said about taking things easy. The kiss was divine, glorious, probably the best kiss the world has ever known and I had a feeling that things were going to work out.

We stopped, gathered ourselves and had breakfast before Rachel left. I went swimming with the other love of my life and managed to give her my full attention even though my stomach was knotted with fear and doubt. Could this work?

The next three weeks passed quickly. Work was very busy and things were going well. I spent some time with Megan each weekend, I did housework and laundry but the rest of the time I was with Rachel. We ate out about three times a week running through a range of culinary styles. We went to the movies, the Citizens Theatre and The Tron to see plays, the Concert Hall for an African band and The Fruitmarket to see Raul Malo which was a great evening and we 'Danced the night away.'

We never went for more than forty-eight hours without meeting. It was fun and I grew to like her more and more with each passing moment. My dreams were pretty good as well.

Crunch time

Rachel and I were due to meet in the pub at 8 o'clock, I just needed a shower before dressing and it would only take me ten minutes to walk there. As I rinsed off I wondered when we could move along but I didn't know the answer and was afraid to push things. I also knew that I was in trouble; I was, without doubt, in love with her.

The doorbell rang at 7.30. I'd done my hair and makeup but still had to dress so I pulled on a robe and opened the door to see who it was. I'm seldom lost for words but the woman standing in front of me was simply stunning. Rachel's hair was up, her make-up sexy, nails polished, heels high and she wore a short dress, I could see most of her legs and what lovely legs.

"Is something wrong?" Nothing was wrong, she was gorgeous and here, on my doorstep. "Can I come in?"

She swept past me, dropped her jacket over the back of the sofa and stood right in front of me looking very serious. She went right for it. "I've told you how I feel; I agreed to take things easy. Do you fancy me?"

I nodded and must have looked like an idiot. "I've not had sex for so long I may have healed up and if I watch any more lesbian porn I'm going to go crazy. I'd like to go to bed with you, right now, this minute."

I smiled as she reached behind her back and pulled down the zipper, I was shocked and didn't move. The dress pooled around her ankles, she stepped out of it and looked at me. She wasn't wearing a bra and the two breasts that were proudly pointing towards me were works of beauty. I managed to look further down and was stunned, stockings and panties that were really sexy. She looked at me.

"Like what you see? If so please take me to bed. Either this goes all the way now or we need to stop kidding each other and move on."

I took her hand and, grinning, lead her to the bedroom. I shrugged off my robe and stood naked except for some briefs. She held out her hands and I took hers in mine.

"Rachel, you are so beautiful, so nice and, my god, so damn sexy standing here like that."

"For heaven's sake shut up and kiss me."

It wasn't the first kiss but this time we knew that it was the precursor to sex, intimacy and with a bit of luck wild passion. I'm sure that my heart stopped for a few moments when our lips met. They were soft but very active and she wasn't shy about inserting her tongue between my lips. She pulled away and I gasped for breath but she nuzzled into my neck and started kissing and licking.

I strained and whispered, "That is amazing and so bloody erotic."

"Good, now let's get these clothes off of you."

"I'm only wearing pants."

"Overdressed!" She kept kissing my neck and shoulders whilst at the same time inserting her thumbs into the waistband and pushing my panties down. I stepped out of them, my senses were on overload, she was here and doing the most extraordinary things to me without much actual contact.

We stayed standing and Rachel continued to nuzzle and kiss my neck, the tops of my shoulders and the front of my chest. I stroked her arms and marvelled at her pale skin and my good fortune.

"I'm nervous. It took a huge amount of courage to come here and do this so please help me out I'm terrified." She kept kissing.

"I'm shocked and impressed. What you are doing right now is such a turn on; I don't want you to be terrified I want to love you. You do know that you are even more beautiful without clothes don't you?"

"No, but thank you. I want to touch your breasts they look sensational, will that be okay?"

As it turns out she didn't wait for an answer but gently moved a hand over my left breast and took its weight. I'm not overly endowed, a B cup, but they are a nice shape and right now they were desperate for her touch. Suddenly the right nipple disappeared into her mouth and she sucked like a newborn wanting sustenance. I've been touched and kissed before but somehow it was never like this, never as erotic or as welcome.

As she worked her magic I felt my legs weakening, "Can we move to the bed, what you're doing is so good that my legs are going to give way very soon and the bed will be more comfortable than the floor?"

Rachel didn't reply or stop what she was doing but moved so that she pushed me backwards. She came along and landed on top of me. That seemed to release her and she started to work with more purpose and intent. "Oh my word, that feels like nothing I've ever felt before and I need you to touch me, down there between my legs, please I'm so close.

Silently she did as I asked sliding a finger between those lips that welcomed her, she brushed against my clit and the world stopped, I thought that the top of my head was coming off. "Oh fuck, oh ..." It was as if someone had pressed the pause button on the video player, everything stopped, no, the sensations that had coursed through me were still going but everything else seemed to have frozen.

Then I realised that Rachel was looking at me with concern and I saw her lips moving but I couldn't hear her. "Wait, please wait," I muttered. Eventually, things kind of resumed. "Sorry, I have no idea what just happened to me then, it was bizarre and I can't put it into words but that was fantastic."

She looked relieved, "You had me worried for a minute I thought that you'd had a stroke or something."

I laughed, "No it was you who was doing the stroking and caused whatever that was. I liked it" I stroked her face. "And now it's my turn." I moved and pushed her onto her back. "Don't say a word unless you need me to stop." She nodded.

I slid down the bed kissing as I went and started to work my way back upwards. She was whimpering by the time I reached her mound and the slightest of touches with my tongue made her come. I lifted one leg and put my shoulder underneath her thigh and repeated that on the other side. "What are you doing?"

For an intelligent woman that may have been the daftest question, she'd ever asked and frankly, I was in no position to answer, my lips and tongue were busy. I pulled a pillow under her bum to improve my access and drove my tongue inside with force and intent. Eventually, she cried "Enough."

I have no idea what the time was as I fell back against the pillow. Rachel rolled onto her side and rested her head on my shoulder and made lazy circles with her fingernail around my navel. "That was more sex than I've had in almost ten years. I've wasted a lot of time. To think if you weren't so nice we could have been doing that three weeks ago."

"When you get your energy back you can ... I don't know, beat me, chastise me, it was my fault I was trying to be nice."

"I'd describe some of what we just did as positively nasty. Hopefully, we'll be able to do it all again soon, including the nasty stuff."

"I've been dreaming about you for months, it's been sending me crazy but my dreams were wrong."

"Wrong, how?"

"In the dreams, you were beautiful and sexy."

She looked puzzled, "What do you mean?"

"You're far more beautiful than the girl in my dreams and sexy does not seem to be quite enough of a description for you, slutty, dirty and adventurous, I don't know, right now I've run out of brainpower."

"Can I stay the night?"

I laughed loudly and she looked at me. "If I had the energy I'd lock the door and hide the keys to stop you from leaving."

"You'd hold me hostage?" She was grinning.

"No, but I suspect that you don't want to leave anyway. I wouldn't hide the keys from you, I'd give you one." Suddenly there was silence, I realised that I'd just said something unusual.

"Are you saying that you'd give me a key to your house?"

I lay silent; did I dare say what I wanted to? I rolled on my side so that I was facing her and the view made me gasp again. "Rachel, I need to think this through with a clear head to be sure. I'm in love with you; I have been for a while. I think that we could be good together but we need to see and not let lust overtake our common sense. I'd give you a key right this minute but I don't have the energy and don't want to leave your side."

"Do you mean that I could come and stay with you whenever I liked?"

"Yes, but can we do this tomorrow when my brain has reset and before we both do or say something stupid?"

Thirty seconds later I heard little tiny snorts, she was asleep and that was such a cute sound. Madness had enveloped us both, it was wonderful.

For someone who claimed not to have much experience she was either a natural or had been watching too much porn. I was awakened by something and it took me a few seconds to realise that she was kissing me and raking her nails along my thighs.

"Good morning, that's quite a way to wake up." She grunted but didn't stop.

As I worked out what was happening I realised that she was down the bed alongside my thighs and smiling whilst kissing those same thighs. Her hand crept up and started stroking my lips, they were wet and I knew that they would be swollen. One finger slipped inside followed by a second, then she kissed me right on the mound and sighed. She wasn't the only one, I could hardly believe what was happening and something that a few months ago I would never have figured in my hopes and wishes, but here it was.

Her tongue lazily stroked against my clit and a third finger slid inside me, now things were moving quickly, there was a heat in my loins and my heart rate was accelerating rapidly. She kept licking and kissing at the same time as she was driving those fingers in and out, twisting, turning, probing. It started low down and built rapidly until I could hold back no longer and it came like a tidal wave, washing over me like nothing I'd felt before, well until a few hours ago when she first cause that same orgasmic bliss. "Holy, holy, bugger, damn, please what are you doing?"

She didn't answer and didn't stop for a couple of minutes, maybe it was seconds or hours I have no idea, I came again, this time I was overwhelmed and I think that I screamed before I passed out.

"Hello. That was fun. Would you shave my pussy for me?"

Had I misheard? "What?"

"I love that you're clean-shaven, it looks so sexy. I want to be like that and I'd decided to do it when I got home. I don't want to rush home but I want to shave and it occurred to me that you could do it, it would be so erotic."