Life's Adventures

She looked like she was going to say more before picking up her purse and leaving.

I was left standing in the hall still hearing moans from the bedroom upstairs. Not sure what to do I went for another beer and sat back on the couch.

The next thing I knew daylight was breaking through the curtains. I slowly made my way upstairs only to find the master bedroom door closed. I didn't have the heart to go in. After going back down stairs trying to piece together the sketchy picture of the night before and drinking two pints of water; I heard the sound of our fucking squeaky bed again. After a few random movements, an unmistakable slow and steady rhythm began again.

I needed to get out and dashed for the door heading for the beach. I walked mindlessly for miles before realising I had better turn back. It helped clear my head and resolve the hangover.

I eventually returned to the house 2 hours later, only to be greeted by Helen making Gary breakfast. She had a short robe on and an arm resting over his shoulder. As she leaned over to kiss him, her breasts were exposed, they looked puffy and red.

When she saw me in the doorway she stood up quickly and moved toward me.

"Hi honey, where have you been?"

I ignored the remark and prevented Helen coming nearer with an outstretched arm.

Turning to Gary I said, "Why are you still here?"

Helen replied for him, "Gary doesn't have anything on today; we thought he could hang out here."

I was furious, "Jesus, haven't you had enough yet."

Gary chirped in at that comment, "Thanks for last night and the morning Rob, your wife is so fucking hot, we had a great time."

He stumbled on oblivious to my ill temper and Helen's rising sense of panic. "Yeah man, Helen is hard to turn down, sorry if you're feeling a bit left out, maybe we could involve you in a fuck later on?"

I replied, "You've got 2 minutes to get the fuck out of my house."

Helen interrupted, "Just clam down Rob, we got a bit carried away in the spur of the moment. It's nothing to get upset about."

I glared at her, "Spur of the moment, is that right. Once my head cleared on the beach it seemed strange to me Emma would leave and not even consider asking her boyfriend to go with her. I think we should call her up, check to make sure she's all right."

Gary hesitated. "She'll be fine and probably catching up on her sleep."

"Humour me" I said without the slightest bit of humour, "And put it on speaker".

Reluctantly Gary made the call. He was trying to speak first only to be interrupted by a tirade form Emma.

"You fucking bastard, don't ever do that to me again. I went along with pretending to be your girlfriend because you said they were both into it and we'd just play around. That guy had no idea, he was nice and I felt like shit. I had no idea what to do when you went upstairs with her. You just used me to fuck his wife; you're a fucking prick...".

Gary hung up before she could continue.

I coldly stared at Gary, "1 minute."

He didn't need to be asked twice, he flew to the bedroom, found the rest of his clothes wallet and shoes and made it out the house in 30 seconds.

We sat in silence.

Helen:

My night and morning had worked out perfectly. After months of frustration I finally decided to do something special for our anniversary. The plan with Gary and Emma had worked. Gary was everything I'd hoped he would be in bed; we were at it most of the night and went at it again in the morning. I'd waited so long and was so excited; my euphoria came to a crashing halt when Rob came back from his walk.

He wasn't stupid and must have worked out that we set him up. I knew that was a risk but thought I could recover and make it up to him one way or the other.

Whilst he was shouting at Gary I thought through how to respond. I couldn't afford to breakdown and beg forgiveness, I needed to maintain control and be clear I was the one making the decisions. He'd be angry of course and I would beg forgiveness to get him back eventually but not yet. I needed to be clear about what he could be losing.

With that in mind I began:

"Your right Rob we set you up! Emma isn't his girlfriend; she's just a friend who agreed to play along. After you turned down my date night I needed another way for us to find a way to explore our sexuality."

"You were that desperate to fuck some new cock."

"That's crude Rob but I suppose in one way I was, I like him and he's been asking me out for ages. You know I had desires, the flirting and everything. I tried to keep it in check for you but I can't deny it."

"Was it worth it?"

"I guess that depends on you, I certainly enjoyed it, Gary is a lot of fun, it was different to us, exciting, more so because it wasn't you, it was purely sexual not about love. I'm pleased to have experienced it. If that hurts our relationship then I might change my mind."

"Wow that's so matter of fact, so no apology for the unfaithfulness or the deceit and lying."

"I'm sorry about lying. I wish I could have just said what I wanted and you to be ok with that, but I didn't think you could accept it. So I thought this way might help get us to where we needed to be."

But no apology for fucking around and where do 'we' need to be exactly...you fucking other guys?"

This conversion wasn't going how I expected. There were no tears and tantrums. Rob was angry when he threw Gary out but maybe he just used that to get rid of him. His eyes were cold now; the lack of emotion was worrying.

"Yes Rob I'd like to fuck other guys and I'd like to find a way for us to keep exploring together. But to be clear I want to be with you more. If it's a choice, I will choose you every time. Anyway you didn't seem to be to upset with Emma stuck to your face last night!"

"Is that the offer, I get to fuck around too."

"I could hardly complain Rob that would be hypocritical, but I'd prefer if you didn't."

Rob laughed, but it was a cold icy laugh, "So you do want your cake and to eat it."

I thought about it, and realised he was right, so I agreed, "I guess I do Rob but you are still my first choice, you always will be."

"There is no choice Helen, you already made the choice last night and I didn't get say in it. I think we have very different values and desires. I've tried to adjust to your needs and be clear where my boundaries were but it's never enough. I refused the date option clearly enough but you keep going further and further down into the rabbit hole. This is all about your needs nothing about what I need. I think it's time to end this sham of a wedding."

I stood up undoing the flimsy tie on my robe. It was reassuring to see his eyes dart down to look at my partially exposed breasts and then down to my pussy.

"Really Rob, you are going to give this up, most men would envy your position. You can have me and this body just as much as you want it. More than that you can be certain I love you, I will always love you. I look after and care for you and always will, we will grow old together happily. You will be miserable without me. So what if I had a bit of strange cock, I had plenty before we started going out. You are over reacting, it doesn't affect us. I told you I love..."

He interrupted, "Seems it means more to me than you Helen and it's not mine any more. I do want you, but I want the version of you before you lost the weight and gained the attitude. I loved that woman with everything and she loved me the same way. She wouldn't have treated me like you have. What I realised this morning is that you're not a nice person, that core goodness that was you has rotted away."

I was panicking now, trying to stay be in control wasn't working. They say the opposite of love is indifference and that's what I could see in his eyes. His cold emotionless eyes.

"Please Rob I am sorry. It is still me; I'm still here and still love you. I won't try anything like this ever again."

Tears were streaming down my cheeks, doing the thing I had tried desperately to avoid,

I tried to hug him, "Please Rob I'm begging."

Rob stood, "Let's get you packed, since you fucked things up, you should be the one to move out don't you think?"

I cried and begged eventually screaming there was no way I was leaving him or our home.

He laughed at that, he was so calm and composed, almost clinical. I needed his emotion for him to see he needed me but it wasn't there. Had I really killed it? It dawned on for the first time that I might have. I'd pushed him too far and he was beyond short term anger.

Eventually he spoke, "Fine stay, but you're no wife of mine, I'll take the spare room, you can have your fuck fest room, it probably stinks anyway."

I tried so many times to talk to him over the following days, weeks and months but each effort was greeted with a silent response. He would speak to me but it was just practical things about bills and the house or if the kids had called. They were asking more questions sensing something was up

I explained how I was missing the cuddles, nights in, conversations, time together, meals out.

The short response I received was "Yeah but you traded those in for the extra cock; it was all your choice."

I got angry and challenged him about when he was going to get over it and give his ego a rest. His response was even more chilling,

"Maybe I already have."

I exploded when he split our finances, but still no effect, he just shrugged and walked away.

I insisted that he must still love me, that you can't fall out of love that quickly?

He replied, "It took about 10 seconds after I realised you had set me up.

This was no petulant huff, there was just complete indifference. I begged to go back to how it was.

He calmly replied, "That ship has sailed, we can never go back, that would require trust and I don't trust you."

I tried saying I was going on dates to make him jealous and he just nodded and said to have fun. A week later he joined a dating site and started going out most Fridays and Saturdays and I was ridiculously jealous. My Rob going out with other women, how could he? I wondered if this was how I made him feel but then realised what I done was far worse.

I was surprised when my efforts to seduce him worked. It was a Saturday night and in desperation I dropped my robe to reveal his favourite corset stockings and suspenders. It had the desired effect, I knew immediately he wanted me. He literally swept me off my feet. I was delirious, relieved at last that I had found a way through to him and reminding him of everything we had. He suddenly put me down and pushed me face first over the back of the couch, the same couch I had sat on with Gary. Rob roughly pulled off my panties dropping his jeans and rammed his cock into me. It felt good, it had been so long. Then I realised he hadn't kissed me. This wasn't the Rob I knew who, the husband who made love to me. He was fucking me; I could almost feel the anger as he pounded away. Despite myself I orgasmed with tears forming at the same time. He kept fucking me until he finished, pulled up his jeans and left me there.

I recovered and went back into the kitchen, meekly saying, "I understand the anger Rob, but that felt pretty cold, I hope in the future we can make love."

Again those cold eyes turned on me, "I thought that's what you wanted Helen, just a good hard fuck that doesn't mean anything, so that's what you got, if you want some more just say the word. After all Gary was right you are a great fuck."

My reply was barely audible, "We're really done then?"

Rob:

She wouldn't leave so I decided to treat her like a co tenant. I was determined not to show her my emotions and hurt and did a pretty good job of it. I found myself veering from loathing and hate to love and feeling sorry for her. For the most part she just looked lost which was the way I felt. I felt bad about fucking her, it was pretty cold but it finally seemed to get the message across that we were done. She left for her sisters the next day.

It has been 9 months since Helen had left for her sisters and 3 months since we divorced and a month since we sold our old house. I never did sleep in the master bedroom again. We did stay in touch, it was impossible not to with the kids and wider family involved but she eventually gave up her attempts to get us back together.

I was surprised when she lingered after dropping the kids off. Despite being adults they had agreed to join me on a long post college trip to tour the Alps in an RV, the money from the house was coming in handy. I noticed the kids quietly move off in the pretence of packing as she approached.

"Hi Rob, you're looking well, really fit and healthy."

I thought she looked tired, still beautiful though replying, "You too Helen."

"This is so you, doing all the outdoor things you loved. We talked about this trip years ago."

"Yeah we did, thankfully I must have instilled something in the kids and they are willing to humour their old dad and keep me company or maybe it's just because I am paying."

"Nonsense they love it just as much. I've heard nothing but all the adventures you have planned and places to see. Is there no one else going with you?"

I smiled "No just us, I'm not seeing anyone Helen if that's what you are asking. A few dates but nothing serious."

She smiled and continued to ask about me, my plans, how I was doing. It was strange to have a whole conversation focused on me, maybe she had changed a bit.

"What is it you want Helen?" I waited thinking that I had never seen her look so nervous or vulnerable.

"I wanted to apologise properly and hoped you might have had enough time to calm down a little. I tried so many times before but you were so angry, it was like a cold fury I couldn't overcome."

I nodded, "Given the circumstances I thought I was calm, but yes time does help ease the hurt."

Helen took a big gasp of air, "My behaviour and actions back then were appalling. I'm so sorry I hurt you; I had no idea how much at the time. The last year has given me some insight into that, I feel totally empty and lost. I threw everything away because of some crazy idea of wanting to experience more and feeling I deserved it. It was all about me and not you, I turned the things you did around to excuse what I was doing. I got what I was looking for but nothing compared to what we had, that connection, the way you always cared for me."

"But you did want to do that." I replied curtly.

"Yes at the time. Would I now given the outcome: No. Would I again: Never. I thought the grass was greener, but it wasn't."

She continued, "I know this is a lot to take in, but I am asking if you would consider giving me a second chance. If that's too much to ask, could we be friends at least. We always wanted to travel when we retired. I wondered whether you might still like to do that, with me I mean, either as friends or as a couple...anything, it's up to you. I'll take anything you are willing to offer."

This was the test, regaining the love of my life doing the things we had dreamed of would make everything complete. I could envisage the family holidays, time with grandkids, traveling the world and smiled as the thoughts raced through my mind. It really would be everything I wanted. I was feeling good; she'd said all of the right things.

"Don't tell me: you turned into a nun since we parted, tried dating but can't find anyone who matches up to me"

"Is that so preposterous Rob?"

"The nun bit is!"

We both laughed at that.

"So you have been shagging young fit guys with abs and big cocks and you're trying to tell me it wasn't as good."

"Trust me it isn't as good as a real relationship."

"That's the last thing I would do Helen: trust you!"

I went on, "I do miss you and I miss everything we had. But you're not the same person I loved for all those years; I would have died for her, but not for you. The end was devastating but you were wrong, I can live alone and well. I did warn you not to mistake my easy going approach for weakness. I'm feeling stronger and happier and I deserve better, better than you."

I could see the tears form in her eyes, she nodded and walked away.

There wasn't really much more to say. The kids miraculously reappeared saying they knew she had planned one last plea and seemed more confident that me that I would reject it. It was over and done so we focused on our trip.

So did I marry her best friend, adopt her kids and live happily ever after? "Not quite!"

I am still an average type of guy looking for a life partner, but I'm ok with that. There's no hurry, maybe there will be someone on my next trip... life should be an adventure after all.