All Comments on 'Little White Lies Ch. 13'

Your writing is among the best on this site. Thank you.

The problem is …. Well it’s just becoming more of the same …. The main two protagonists actually don’t interact much and the interesting narrative aspects are glossed over in favour of yet more group sex …. Frankly it’s become boring

Yet again, more and recapping of whats motivating the main characters... why? Its chapter THIRTEEN!! We know already! At least 5 pages of your "70" right there.

You should recap on minor characters that don't appear for 2-3 Chapters, not major, core events we all remember... Is Jessie going to relive her and Don's encounter with everyone she hasn't spoken with... save your words for content not recap. I bet she has to explain it to Candy next, another 2 pages...

And please get at least 1 of your "editors" to sort out the "he", "her", "hi" and his"... you'd think some of these spelling mistakes would be spotted... 1 or 2 probably acceptable, but when you go on about all this drama about "getting it right ", "its with my editor" you'd think they or you would spot them in your final readings... really not worth the delays, or you're just waffling about this 'backroom' staff that keep holding things up.

Get back to your JTSoU roots,

Dex fucks the living shit out of Jessie, a couple of times in a row, she has earth shattering intergalactic orgasms, yet, he doesn't cum (thats fine), she's shattered to the core, yet he's that one that goes for a nap and she goes for a walk around the house... seriously????

Go John!

Fun times with Jess and Dex and their crew! Why weren't my friends at this age so cool? Oh well. This series and MSMM are still very entertaining, MC. I find myself rooting for Don to succeed with a good GF. He's still a youngster in my book, at a full decade younger than me!

Im starting to notice a pattern in your stories. The main love interests have more intimacy and chemistry with other peopl outside the relationship than they do with their significant other. mike and danni, dex and jesse, kelly and duncan. Like what is the end game here because none of these people should be together. Jesse seems to have better sexual chemistry with everyone other than dex, dex and donna seem to be better for each other, kelly seems to come a lot harder when the person she's fucking is not duncan,and clearly enjoys experimenting when duncan is not involved like wtf