All Comments on 'Living Vicariously'

I feel like you put very little effort into this, you know that, right?

Great short story

Well done. It will be interesting to see - the hoard prefers public execution, but this was due a measured response. Particularly like written characters can be perfectly flawed - 5 from me

If the wife doesn't know how the so called sexual predator got to her then it's going to happen again. The only way to prevent the same thing happening again is to know how it happened in the 1st place

Good one!

5

A great short story. The MC is right, in our stories we write drama and build emotion to draw the reader along. But in reality, the lines are blurred a lot more.

This one also hit home a little personally for me, loved it!

WAIT! Where's the cuckold? I was told there was going to be a cuckold! Aren't ALL stories here about cuckolds? I heard this was practically the CSN. Cuckold Story Network that is. In lieu of the lack of a cuckold in this story, I am afraid that I will be unable to give you 1☆. You will just have to accept 5🌟 and be happy with that!

Well done. We should collaborate and somehow put John Baker and George Baker together, seeking avenger-style paybacks at the bar. We can involve Mordbrand to add the piano guy! Oh, wait! Baker was the bad guy in your tale. We'll figure something out! Maybe your Baker learns his lesson via the broken nose and becomes a good guy. Takes one to know one sort of thing. Nice little story!

A short well written story. 5*

The punishment clearly fit the crime, for both predator and prey. Nicely done. Thank you.

The Bear liked it- a lot. 5 stars, The Bear approves. More, please. Happy endings at great, sometimes.

If anyone is interested, the only thing wrong with Will Smith's Oscar slap was it was a bitch slap. He should have broken the fucker's nose. just the Bear's opinion. Way to go, Will.

The BEAR

nice piece of reality.can feel my knuckles aching

There was a predator, a delusional wife, and a moron.

Sounds like the start of a really bad joke and this kinda proved it.

LOL! You lied!

Great story!

A good short story.

Well it could happen this way. In real life things are never simple. A conversation about why she let someone else interfere with her marriage would be interesting. Would I trust her? Not for a long time and she would definitely have to understand I would trust but verify.

Why so many one page tales now being posted? Most are really pathetic written by "wannabes" authors. Just_Words (who is a good author) appears to have fallen into the trap.

Who called her?

I've wondered

Is the author "merely" words or "righteous" words? Righteous works for me.

"the possibility of hope"

An interesting turn of phrase. He has gone from a roaring flame of a marriage with a woman who "always been someone who takes a swear seriously. When she says "I swear..." she literally means "As God is my witness..."" to the tiniest of embers, barely aglow and flickering, and a woman who is willing to violate her own sense of dedication to her heartfelt promises. A very shaky "possibility of hope", being built on the personality of a woman made of shifting sand instead of brick.

Maybe she has learned her lesson. But can trust be restored? He KNOWS that what he believed about her is NOT reliable. She slipped once. She is a person who can shift their morals. She has proven that. He needs to keep an eye on her. Does he want that role? Does he want to be her keeper? For how long?

His image of her has been tarnished. Can it really EVER be fully restored? Perhaps we delude ourselves about the people we love. We are all human and fallible. But if our lovers faults are not pushed in our faces, we can continue our delusions of their "perfection" and we are happy. Being human, once confronted with our lover's faults, can we ever be as happy with a "damaged" version of the one we thought to be perfect? Can we just let it go? Or will the sense of disappointment chew at us and the relationship? Will the fractured sense of trust doom the relationship, even if she returns to being perfect in the behaviors he expected?

LOTS of questions, perhaps even more for him than her.

Nice short.

Kinda leaves things hanging. I guess that's okay. I liked the story. D

You write very well and I look forward to reading your stories. This one was a little gem. The short, short story has been around for a long time. I would guess that even before writing story tellers had a some to tell. Keep up the good work. Short or long I’ll be waiting. *****

acceptable outcome

Very Nice Story!!

Loved it. Dripping with reality. Clever way to include the “writing” bit into a tale.

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You know that, right?

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5 *****

Women never make mistakes when it comes to cheating, they always plan what will happen. So cheating is always a conscious act on their part, and there are always feelings in the picture when a woman cheats

The punishment for the predator was way to easy, he deserves to have every joint i his body broken

Yes, this is what people do in real life. No speed dialing a lawyer to start an automatic divorce. No moving around money and financial assets. No moving out to a small apartment. None of the other "cookie cutter" behaviors that we read in many of these Loving Wives stories. Good story. 5

People make mistakes. Especially men, who have way more opportunity, money, control and 2% more of the population. This category should be called "stories for men who can't get women"

Not bad, not good. “You know that, right?” Wish the author hadn’t become mesmerized by certain phrases. “You know that, right?” Having a character describing writing characters didn’t mesh particularly well with the story. “You know that, right?” But still, far better than I could do. “Which kinda sucks, right?"

Really well done. Loved your narrative, "in reality, good people make mistakes". So true! 5*

Great story. Love the way she came back all apologetic after the asswipe called her.

Interesting, can't imagine having that much restraint in that situation. It seems like the wife deserved a more severe admonishment.

well said and written. I like your style anyway. No "anon" nitpicking here.

Great Story. I like the idea of writing about writing (most of the stories here have concentrated on Literotica based stories) but for me most of the attempts have fallen flat. This story rose above those I have read.

This story is a total and complete telling of what I believe you wanted to convey. Short stories like this one are meant to capture a moment in time or a singular emotion. I have made a few amateurish attempts at writing and realize that successfully capturing that moment or emotion is much more difficult than most readers understand.

For those readers who feel it to be incomplete please use a little bit of your imagination to complete the story to your satisfaction. A page could be written about how he found out about the inappropriate actions of his wife and co-worker: He was told by a friend/relative/co-worker/ex-girlfriend trying to get him back/ PI /FBI agent (probe into insider trading by Baker)/stopped by the same bar accidentally/just a bad feeling after seeing them interact at Christmas party/social media/ he accidentally sees texts, emails, smoke signals/all the above.

A second page could start with the following day they get up and: he throws her out/ her shame is posted on social media/ asks her to let him watch (threw that in for the cuckold crowd)/sells her to a Mexican Whore house/ has her served/ his playboy centerfold, movie star, Nobel prize-winning, doctor, lawyer ex-girlfriend comes to the house for a weekend of sexual revenge/has a heartfelt, honest conversation about their marriage/ all the above/ none of the above.

Please feel free to mix and match as your imagination guides you.

Just_Words has trimmed the fat and served us just the meat of this story. Thank you for this tasty treat.

"Have they learned from this, or will they do it again?" To answer that, you need to know why, and the why is a difficult question to answer.

If "why" is a difficult question the you'd better make sure you get a definitive answer otherwise if you choose to stay with this person then you're always going to wonder when will they start to feel "vulnerable" again and start cheating again. Just because she didn't have "sex" doesn't mean she wasn't cheating. Do you really want to be in a partnership where your role is that of a "warden" over your partner's trustworthiness?

I liken this to when a person decides to start stealing. They begin small, shop lifting items from various stores but never taking merchandise that costs more than $20. They rationalize in their minds that its just small stuff and the amount they take is never going to financially hurt a large corporation. One day they get caught leaving the store by the Loss Prevention Manager with items they didn't pay for. When they try to rationalize their "thefts" from the store with the answer - "It was never going anywhere further, I swear!" you think they're not going to call the police and that they'll escape without any consequences.

Whether its cheating or stealing there's a whole concision mindset about how we got to the point where we thought it was OK and that we were entitled to a little "fun" on the side.

Yep, that’s pretty much exactly how it should have been done. The predator now knows there is a price to be paid if he chases after her again and she knows she is hanging by a thread and will be much more cautious around any wanna-be lotharios. The call she got is not explained, so it could have been the dipshit himself or a friend who heard about what her hubby did. Either way, she knew she was in deep shit for crossing a line. Well done, JW.

This felt real life and could actually happen. Even though it was a short story it felt like the story had all the pertinent information. Yes some questions are still lingering but not the big ones. Well done.

Thank you for failing in that very noble goal of keeping the story to 750 words. What was it- 751? I mean, since you were waxing so eloquent, we actually got to learn the wife's name and a little of her feelings. Aftermath? aw heck- who needs that kind of fluff? A good OUTLINE is what we're looking for.....

I apologize for the sarcasm, but dang it, so many writers here who have the talent, the imagination, and the ability to express words is totally interesting and thought provoking ways- have fallen into the obsession to CONDENSE those words and still have them readable. I don't get it. For those of us who are in the older generation, let me recommend an excellent story by this author, 'The Latter Years', along with many others he's done.

(for kencoro) -- the guy he punched called her. To Just_Words (one of my favorite authors), some folks don't get that short stories can span many realms. This one, a short vignette, detailing a snapshot of one of life's important moments. It doesn't need resolution per say, the MC did resolve it at this point. True he might do the trust-but-verify moving forward, rightly so. But that is not part of this story. That said, this is 5* all way. Tight, well written, no fortuitous verbal excess.

Anonymous about 5 hours ago

Why so many one page tales now being posted? Most are really pathetic written by "wannabes" authors. Just_Words (who is a good author) appears to have fallen into the trap.

Reader, as you are anonymous, I don't know if you have ever written a story of your own. If you have great, if not, let me give you some simple facts. Most writers use either new Times Roman or Calibri astheir font style and 12 as the font size. At 12, using all the right spacing and such, you average between 325 and 350 words per page. One L/T page is 6 to 7 typed pages. So you can see that a 750 word story is around 4 pages typed. A full page story is around 2000 words. Now try and write your own story and see how you fare.

Well paced. Short and to the point. Bravo

i can be happy with that, not every story requires a nuclear solution...but it does require a solution 5*

Great story, very well written! DD

The real meat of this story was skipped. The conversation while and after he ate is what really counts. Why was she in a situation that allowed such behaviour? Why did she do it knowing it was wrong? If he in any way supported her going out drinking and dancing with a mixed crowd, he needs to shut the fuck up and take his medicine. If she did it on the sly, he has serious problems and Lucy has some 'splaining to do.

Interesting story. I don’t know for someone who takes promises seriously even this little slip is a big step off the line.

lol ah cmon man that's not how women work.

She's fine for awhile. Maybe gets promoted once or twice into a position with travel. And now she has a job where she can fly away for fun and away from hubbys spys. And sure he'd get mad but he will take her back. Heck, they even slept in the same bed after everything was revealed.

Measured. Probably how I would lean. HOWEVER, I, somehow feel less of myself when I consider this…

Thanks for the story!

A blah ending to a blah story is a happy ending? Sorry, but not really.

I enjoyed this story, and it was quite reasonable and realistic. However, I don't read Literotica for realism. I guess over 95% of lit readers are not looking for realistic stories. We are looking for fantasy stories, We like fiction. Still, it is refreshing to enjoy a realistic story from time to time. This one was well-written, and I liked the antagonist getting punched in the face. Four stars

"Why so many one page tales now being posted?"

Because far too many commentators have been complaining about the length of longer ones.

Who called Maggie? If it was George then there are more problems in this marriage than related in the story. Bill says her confession matches the information he had been given. But, if George has her number and feels he can call her while she's at home... there's a whole other can of worms waiting to be opened.

On my first read through I thought this story was complete despite it's brevity. The more I think about that call the more I feel like an important part of the story was ignored and left as a loose end.

I'm fairly certain she was called by Bill to tell her what hubby did. Great fir the husband, but he should have followed up with a kick to his balls.

A decent shot at a middle-of-the-road "rationally considered" response to a middle-of-the-road transgression. Comments regarding any nuanced decision by an injured party to their injury will never satisfy rabid BTB'ers, nor really those of the opposite persuasion. Warnings have been given; the future will prove whether lessons were learned...or not.

Well done, and thanks for the tone of the tale. More please.

Why was she taking her lover's call. I agree about measured responses, but I would know every detail before I let the slut touch me again. He may be a predator, but she's a married woman with a voice to say no.

5***** for the husband's appropriate response to the potential problem of a predator and wife hook up. Write On!

I like this one for a lot of reasons:

- Short, to the point, early action

- Beat married pussy hound with one punch

- No drawn out Secret Squirrel evidence gathering

Well done. 5 Stars.

Loved it. Original. Well-written. Thanks.

Ed

That was a fine vignette.

This story is nothing without the author's explanations of what it was supposed to mean, what we were supposed to feel, hear and how we were supposed to react. That is no story at all. I can tell you about how I wrote a best-selling true story about Donald Trump and why his wife stays with him even though he went through a botched sex change operation and they only managed to cut his dick off before he changed his mind and had them sow a Ken doll dick on to replace the one he had but he'd only deny it anyway. My point being is that without the actual story, my telling you about it is pointless. Learn to write and show readers a story in their mind's eye, don't tell them about it. I'd give you zero stars but that wouldn't reduce your score so I guess I have to give you a higher mark than you deserve. ONE STAR

It was fine, but the writer angle felt a little forced. Still better penmanship than most.

Interesting angle and a complete story, well told. 5*

The ultimate in “tell, don’t show” makes for a very poor story.

Rubbish!

How many readers have real life stories that they would be interested in putting down on paper or do they relate with some stories because they have shared that experience. I'd be willing to say a larger number and can count myself in both groups. My story might get a three or four star rating but for me this is a good 5 star effort.

A good story. Short and to the point. 5*.

HE called her, from the hospital! Hahahaha!!!

5 stars for Great Writing. Great Story and a Great punch to the nose for the slime ball trying to fuck the wife. Good Job, I love a happy ending. Thank You.

People are inherently flawed. Life is cast in shades of grey, we are not as congruent as we expect others to be, and there are no easy solutions, because no two problems are the same. That's because human interaction and relationships have at their center, inherently flawed people. We've circled back to where we started.

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Good writing reflects life but with a particular focus on conflict, on the ensuing struggle that conflict creates and on man's failing or overcoming in that struggle. Sadly, many demand their writing be black-and-white, all absolutes, as conforming to a formula. There's an irony that those who adjudicate everything in terms of cuck-shit/not-cuck-shit are themselves guilty of the people who write "cuck-shit" which is the very definition of formula-drive, sclerotic writing. Janus, anyone?

Well played!!! Nice, tight, effective and entertaining writing. Your profile name is still a glaring misnomer! 5+++/5!!

Wasn't what I think? Well I guess he was thinking about other things than. Stupid cunt..

Great feel to it with limited description the characterisation came through.

Very well told story.

I don't see why she earned any consideration. What would she have done had he not stopped it? That's the key question. And it remains unanswered. And who called her? George? To warn her? And why does Bill not get arrested? Breaking a nose, even in Texas, is probably still a crime.

*****He will never be in a better situation in his relationship with his wife. Thanks for the read.

Redundancy without shedding light. You know that, right?

Another great short story from Just_Words. This autho, along with a very few others such as More&More can tell a complete story in one page. He found the asshole and broke his face. He confronted the wife, and she told him a verifiable truth. He decides to keep her. That’s a story.

Sure, OK, Why Not? What has he got to lose? The wife was open to seduction and the semi-cuck had no clue until his friends told him. So how much of a marriage are they salvaging? It is illustrated that the wife committed adultery, and the asshole predator was completely at ease about the whole thing, showing no concern what so ever that the cuck knew, or that he cared if the cuck knew. The wife showed remorse only after she was caught, but claims the affair had not included intercourse, yet. So we don't really know that the husband is forgiving, or if the whore even deserves a second chance. All of that will come out in the counseling and the subsequent behavior of the whore and the cuck. So we are commenting on a setup, but not a completed story. Maybe someday someone will provide that closure. Right now I'd say it s 50/50 at best. Thanks for the effort.

She still cheated maybe not all the way but

MAKES SENSE...

Interesting, but not a loving wife story. A cheating Ho and a revengeful husband instead.

I'd like to read the Donald Trump story if the writer really wrote it.

5 stars - short but got to the point pretty fast.

Just another cuck story!

JUST_WORDS attempted a story resolution based on people in the real world are complicated yet JW made the story characters simple. In real life Bill the vigilante would have to constantly look out for George and / or George’s friends or hired muscle. Unless a vigilante kills the target and every relative and friend of the target there is always a next threat to the vigilante. But it was just a well written story not a template for a society.

Dontcha just love the tales from Texas??? LP

I almost laugh at comments because most responses are figments of frail fantasy. Thank you, your epilogue, speaks a truth seldom seen here. Keep up the good work.

A good measured response. A grope over the clothes=1 sucker punch??? I think a couple of kicks or a broken hand would have been a better lesson to carry forward but that’s just me

Maybe you chased off the fox this time, but he still knows where the hen house is.

I liked it. It was measured and responsive. Trust would definitely have taken a hit, but I don't think it would have been reasonable to end a marriage. Good short story.

I want to thank everyone for their comments. I did delete 2 that needed to call the author a cuck, but that is my policy as it should be for all authors.

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It is true that I am attracted to very short stories that are really just a brief moment in time. Some readers want to get every detail handed to them right down to the color of the protagonist's socks, but I think the reader can paint in some of the details without that. I try to include whatever is necessary within a context that seems natural, but perhaps I sometimes fail.

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In my mind, she went out with friends from work, perhaps had a little too much to drink, was swept up in the moment, and allowed a coworker to get away with something inappropriate. Like guilty people since the beginning of time, she uses anger with his late arrival home to mask her guilt and fear. When it comes out, we learn that it really wasn't all that terrible. She was wrong and she is determined that it will not happen again. The predator calls her to warn her, maybe thinking he will score some points and draw her in closer. I don't need to know the why. Her response is more important when she realizes that her husband knows and she needs to fix it.

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Will she do it again? Not in my mind, but you can read her differently if you wish. That's another thing. I don't require that you see the same character that I write. I just hope that the story sparks your imagination and takes you someplace interesting if only for a moment.

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Thanks for reading my stories.

5* I very much like your story within a story here and your subtle reflection on the LW style. Beautifully written, very effective. Thank you.

Real life is always complicated!

So well done. What a unique take on the old tale. Five Stars.

Agree

5

Good story and yes, I think she gets another chance. Probably been married for a while and sounds like there was a trust built up between them. It did take a hit and will have to be earned back again, but hopefully there's a base they can rebuild on. Maybe the guy needs to reexamine why she would let the guy get as far as he did.

Nice.

Fiction is easier to make than true life, that's true.

But fiction and reality aren't far apart

here in our kind of LW.

And sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.

But small mistakes are worth being forgiven.

The writer got that right.

He also did some fine writing on a fine plot.

Top ratings from me.

"a measured response that is appropriate to the offense"? Let's see here by the end of the story the wife hasn't even been slapped on the wrist, and poor pussyhound George, who by the way never took any vow, has a broken nose. Shouldn't it be the person that broke their promise who suffers the major damage? Great writing by the way. 5 stars even if i find the story trajectory skewed.

The story was well written and your analysis about people making mistakes is pretty close to reality. Because my own lost marriage some 40 years ago I prefer a bit more retribution, not violate retribution but at least some guilt and blame being placed on the guilty parties. Setting all personal preferences aside you get 5 stars.