Lori a Fresh Start and a New Love

"No," I murmured.

Her tongue diving into my slippery depths made it impossible to fight her off. Any thoughts of trying to defuse her assault vanished as her fingers joined her tongue in my pussy, and all I could do was grab a handfull of her hair and enjoy the attack. It was a thing with us, she loved to tease. She took great pleasure from edging me.

She knew as soon as I grabbed her hair and rubbed her face in my slipperiness that I wasn't in the mood for teasing.

It was sharp and passionate, her tongue an angry aggressor. Her attack left me with no false illusions. She had no thought of her own desire; this was her way of saying sorry. I knew it was guilt driving her concupiscence, but I didn't care; I was about to die a little, and I planned to enjoy it.

"You know I don't have time to repay that little gift, right?"

"Like I care. The essence of a gift is in the giving. I'm sorry about the kiss, and not being able to go with you today," she said between her panting breaths.

"Tab, I love Tina as well. You focus on looking after her. I can sort out the band."

"You trying to tell me you don't need me?" It was a teasing accusation, but i picked from her tone that there was a hint of reality behind it.

"Tab, you put all this together, well, you and Marla. I can take it from here because you already did all the hard work. All I'm doing is working out the schedule."

She rolled closer and kissed me playfully. "I was teasing."

"Don't lie to me, Tab; it might have been light-hearted, but you were serious."

"The cops might want Tina to be able to give a stable address if they assess her as a user. Will you be okay if I give them this address."

"Tab, it's your house. I'm just a boarder."

"Is that how you feel, like this isn't your home?"

"No, I was just saying. Sorry it came out wrong. I'm comfortable with whatever you decide. I might agree to a three month tour and you'll be stuck with that."

"You'll do no such thing. Amber wouldn't let you, anyway."

"Amber's not going, she has to take the girls in to the doctors for a check up."

"Shit, now I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to leave everything up to you."

Climbing out of bed, I said, "I'm running late. I better go. She got out with me and gave me a very deep passionate kiss. "I love you, Lori."

"Love you more." I dressed quickly, and was out the door. Even Marla was busy, leaving me to sort out the tour details. It took longer than expected, it was late when I got home and everybody was collected in the lounge.

"Well, how did it go?" Amber asked.

"We're going on a six week holiday, starts in a month."

Marla and Amber gave me a thumbs up. "Good job. Where are we playing?"

"Three shows in Melbourne. Three in Sydney, two in Brisbane, one in Cairns, one in Darwin. Another in Adelaide, and four in WA."

"Whoo hoo, sounds like a blast," Marla said enthusiastically.

"Hell yeah, shit. What am I gonna do with the girls?" Amber said with realisation creeping in. "I was only expecting two weeks. Mum's gonna shit bricks."

"Sorry, it was the best I could do."

"Yeah, it was always going to get to this stage."

Tab spoke for the first time. "I can look after them for you." That brought the conversation to a short sharp conclusion. I heard what she said, but the words didn't compute. "What does that mean?"

She winced, knowing what she was about to say was going to upset me. "The court has released, or allowed Tina bail on her own recognisance. The one stipulation is she has to be supervised. Her parents can't do it. I certainly wasn't going to leave her in Marty's hands, so I volunteered."

"How the hell is that supposed to work? Aren't you supposed to be on your own tour, Tina?" I spluttered, trying hard not to sound as irritated as I felt.

"The only reason they let me stay out is if I reside in Auckland for six months. I have to attend drug rehab, and stay here. Marty has cancelled the tour, citing ill health. I have to attend a course at a private rehab facility for a month and undergo weekly drug testing," Tina whimpered.

"You're telling me you're not coming with us?" I said falteringly.

"I'm sorry Lori, but as we talked about this morning, you don't need me. I would love to go with you, but you don't need me. They'll assign a liaison person. It's not like you'd be on your own."

"And you're going to stay here and nursemaid Tina?"

"I had to. They weren't going to release her other wise. Remi has been busted big time, and he is being held in remand. You wouldn't believe how much shit he had at the house. Bloody idiot shot himself in the foot."

"You sure you wouldn't mind looking after the kids as well?" Amber asked. I'm sure she was trying to deflect some of my antagonism.

"I'm sorry, Lori." Tina gushed as the tears rolled down her cheeks. "I didn't ask Tab to suggest that. I don't want to cause trouble."

Tab slid her arm around her, and cuddled her. "You're not causing trouble. We want to help. We're all your friends, and all we want to do is help you."

"Thank you." She sobbed, her body shuddering with every new outburst.

"Tina, we got your back Cuz... There's nothing to be sorry for. We've all fucked up at some point."

"Yeah, Tina, chill babe," Marla added. "There's no need to get wound up. Right Lori?" Her eyes fell on me as she emphasised the last bit.

"Yeah, whatever. Stay. You're right. We don't need you." I spat back snidely."

"Come on, Lori." Amber pleaded. "Don't be like that girl. Shit she's just trying to do the right thing."

"Yeah, of course she is," I remarked, as I walked past them all, on my way up the stairs. "I need a shower."

"Cuz, Rhonda is waiting. You promised her a piano lesson." Amber called.

Showered and refreshed, I walked back down. The group had broken up. Tab and Tina were in the kitchen, Marla had already left and Amber was playing with Honey and Kaylee. I could hear Rhonda plunking away on the Piano, trying to get the scales right.

I walked in and sat beside her. None of this was her fault. We started off with a few exercises, then moved into scales. Just to change it up, we played a couple of songs, me playing the low keys, and her playing the highs. I chose modern contemporary songs, stuff she would know.

Her giggles and laughter lifted my mood. She was a good kid whose parents had failed her. Now she was trapped in the foster system, and luckily had ended up staying here with Tab because she had caused so much trouble. No other parents would take her on.

After the lesson I wandered into the kitchen where Tab and Tina were getting ready to serve dinner.

Tab saw me walk in and walked over, her arms draping loosely around my neck, her lips grazing mine. "I'm sorry, babe. I did what I thought was right. I'll make it up to you."

"And just how were you planning on doing that?"

"I was going to let you decide. Whatever you want is what I'm prepared to do."

"Anything?"

"Absolutely."

"Shit, you infuriate me. Christ, there's not one damn single thing we haven't done sexually."

"I'm standing over here. I can hear all of this," Tina said a hint of a smile spreading across her face.

"Sweets, I was hoping you would come up with something better than sex. You're right, that part of our life is pretty near perfect."

As she called out to everybody that grub was up, she whispered, "Think about it. I just offered to do anything you want."

"What if I said I wanted you to marry me?" I spluttered.

She sniggered. "If that's a bloody proposal, it's the worst one I have ever heard. If that's what you want, then ask me properly."

"You just said you'd do anything I wanted."

She nodded slowly. "I will."

Dinner was as always a noisy affair. The table was full and it was almost impossible to get a word in.

This was the side of Tab that amazed me. All these girls, all from different ethnic backgrounds, all with their own special problems, and she brought them together.

Somehow, and only god knows how she did it, but they all opened up to her, they all treated her better than most kids treat their parents. She had a gift, she was a nurturer and worked tirelessly to make their lives better. She didn't try to be their mother, she simply talked to them like they were her equal. Never raised her voice. Everything was done calmly.

The girls respected her. It's not like they were suddenly perfect. They all stuffed up, but hiding behind the respect was the knowledge that Tab was only trying to help, and to a one, they apologised and spent the next week trying to make it up to her.

I knew that's what lay behind her wanting to help Tina, but after seeing that kiss it made me wonder.

That night in bed, things were a little tense, we snuggled together as we always did, but there was tension, and it was being held down by the thinnest of sheets. I think we were both scared to open up in case it started a snowball rolling.

We both knew how quickly those snowballs gather momentum.

I was almost asleep when it clearly got to much for Tab, and she had to open the door.

"Why were you so upset that I offered to stay with Tina?"

Giving my eyes a good rub, and without rolling towards her, I replied, "Maybe it's because we planned for you to be with me. The tickets already booked. I love having you with me when I perform. It gives me strength."

"Surely this is more important though. She needed our help."

"Yeah, well it's going to make me look like a silly cow, because now I have to tell them you're not going. And by the way, it would have been nice to be consulted before you made the decision. I would have thought for something as important as that, it would warrant at least a conversation."

She had been laying on her back, but rolled over, snuggling to my back. "You're right. I should have called you, it is something we should have talked about. I'm sorry. And I'm also sorry that I won't get to be with you like we planned. I was looking forward to it just as much as you."

"Doesn't seem like it to me." I mumbled.

"Please don't be mad with me. I thought I was doing the right thing."

"You are." I muttered, "but we should have talked about it."

It was an uncomfortable nights sleep. We both tossed and turned, bumped into each other, woke each other. I think I was more tired when I woke up than when I went to bed.

Breakfast was as noisy as ever, but it was after when Rhonda and I were playing the piano together that she said cryptically, "Auntie Tab is going to miss out, aye Lori?"

"Yeah, she sure is."

"Gee, you fellas are so lucky. I've never even been out of Auckland, let alone the country."

A smile crossed my lips as I said. "Then you should come in Tabs place aye."

She stopped playing. "You being serious Lori?"

"Yeah, why not. She doesn't want to come. No reason why you can't."

She was gone in a flash screaming loudly. "I'm going to Australia." She ran up the stairs, pulled open all the girls rooms and shouted the house down. It took about three minutes before Tab was standing behind me. "What the hell is all that about?"

"Rhonda's gonna take your spot. She's been doing good with her practice, and somebody may as well go. At least she wants to spend some time with me."

Tab never said a word, but I heard her feet stomping heavily as she stormed away. It wasn't as easy as that. First, we had to rush her passport through, which cost over a hundred bucks. Then I had to get the label to change the name on the ticket. Every action annoyed Tab a little more, which made me feel a little pang of joy.

Especially when Tab had to approach CIPS to get approval for Rhonda to leave the country.

Tina seemed moody, as well. She could barely stand to be around me, although, when Tab asked me if I would go with them when Tina had to go in for her weekly drug test, I agreed to go.

Sitting in the waiting room, Tina had to fill out all these questions. As she started filling them out. I noticed her pen wavering over some of the check boxes.

I had filled those forms out hundreds of times, and I wondered why she was struggling. Then it hit me, the mood swings, the pensiveness around me.

"Tina, don't lie in those forms. If you think you're going to fail, write it down. You can't cheat the blood test. If you've used, it will show up."

"For goodness sake, Lori. Stop being so negative. The poor girls just nervous. Aren't you Tina?"

"There could still be residue in my system, like, it might still show positive even though I haven't had anything... Couldn't it?"

"You stupid bitch; you're still using aren't you?"

Her face went bright red and her eyes were fixed firmly on the floor.

"Oh, Tina, You haven't... Have you?" Tab asked with a dubious sigh.

"I was so anxious, I thought it would ease my nerves. There's been so much tension around the house lately."

"Shit, what are we going to do?" Tab asked me.

"Nothing we can do except be honest. Throw yourself on the mercy of your probation officer."

"Fuck." Tab hissed.

"I'm sorry, I was just so anxious."

Tab looked at me. "Is there any chance this won't show up?"

"No, they've got her. There's nothing you can do. I know because I've been there, done that."

Yep, she was screwed and Tab had to talk her way out of it. Tina was lucky she got a woman officer. I always found they were more understanding.

At home, Tab went nuts. She ripped Tina's suitcases apart, her bed, pillow case. Tina handed over a small packet of coke. I just had the sneakiest feeling that wasn't all there was.

I was a bit more experienced than Tab with this, and knew exactly where to look. Under the innersole of her runners, which she never wore. Inside the padding on her tiny little demi cup bra which she never wore. Although as I pulled the little plastic bag out from under the padding, my mind filled with images of how sexy she would look in it.

Tina was devastated when I turned them over to Tab. Tina got the most severe lecture I had ever heard Tab give. She dumped on her.

With preparing for the Aussie trip, time went really quickly. Tab and I never really got time together apart from in bed, where things hadn't fully recovered.

It was the night before we were due to fly out that it hit the fan. Tab snuggled extra close, we had just made love, and we were enjoying the us time as we cuddled.

Tab whispered in my ear. "If you meet somebody nice while you're over there. I wouldn't mind if you you know... Slept with them."

My breathing stopped for a minute, and it took my heart a few moments to catch up. "What did you say?" I asked.

"You heard me." She said. Don't make a thing out of it. I know what you're like. I merely meant, if you do meet somebody, you have my permission, just be careful, aye?"

I sat up straight in the bed, throwing her head off my shoulder. "What sort of animal do you think I am? Do you think I can't go six weeks without getting a bit?"

"No, I was simply trying to do something nice for you."

"Fuck, Tab. Do you have no respect for me at all?"

"Off course I do."

"I went two fucking years without a single sexual connection. Two fucking years, and you don't think I can go six weeks. Jesus, I'm not a slut."

"I wasn't inferring you were, but I know what tours can be like. There'll be lots of pretty girls hanging around."

"I don't get you Tab. Why would you even say that. Surely you know that you can trust me."

"Yes, forget it. I fucked up again. I was merely being nice."

Laying back down. I let my arms cover my eyes. Then, it was like a bright light exploded in my brain. "Oh my fucking god. This isn't about me is it. This is about you. You're already planning on getting between Tina's legs aren't you. This was all about easing your guilty conscience."

"No," she gasped in horror. "That's not what I was getting at. Let's just forget I said anything.

"Oh, I wish I could."

It was a sad day at the airport. Tab and I hugged for an age, I think we were both trying to forget the conversation from the previous night.

It was only the final boarding pass that forced us to let go. Tina gave me a belated hug. "I love you, Lori, please be safe."

"Thanks Tina. While I'm away, try to stay clean. You're killing Tab."

She grimaced. "I'm trying, honestly."

"Two failed drug tests doesn't seem like trying to me."

It was having Rhonda along that lifted my spirits. There's no way you could stay sad with her around. She was so buoyant and excited.

The gigs were incredible. We played to full houses and the gay crowd got right behind us. In modern day speak, we were killing it, and selling so much merch it was hard to keep the tables stocked.

The bad point was finding matching times to call Tab. Early morning for Aus was mid morning New Zealand. She always seemed to be taking Tina to the drug rehab, lawyers or the court house.

Lucky Renatta was there to help out. By the time we finished gigs it was after midnight, and Two AM in New Zealand. As much as I wanted to call, to lie in bed and chat with her, it just wasn't happening.

Tab was right about one thing, there were a multitude of chicks, young and, old who were prepared to enjoy a one night stand. There was no way I was going down that road, though. I lasted two years by myself. Surely I could last six weeks?

Driving up to Sydney, I got a chance to chat with Tab. Unfortunately, she was driving, so she handed the phone to Tina. "Hows the recovery going?" I asked

"Good, I got a clean card last visit, although I am pretty shaky. Especially at night. That's when it's worse. My body starts trembling and shaking, and then the night terrors start. I don't know how you did that on your own," she confessed.

"Camomile, and nettle tea were great for the restless nights. Get some, I promise it's help.?

"We've pulled over, Tab wants to speak to you. Bye, Lori, I love you."

"Love you too," I replied.

"Sorry about that, the traffic is so thick this morning. I finally found a spot to pull over. How are you sweets?"

"Good, the tours going great, and Rhonda is keeping us on our toes. She's worse than you. She's got her list and she orders us around."

Tab laughed heartily. "There's hope for that girl yet. Is she doing her homework?"

"Yeah, while we're driving Marla has her under her wing."

Tab sniggered. "I don't know how you were able to convince CIPS that Marla had degrees is Business management and English."

"She started them, just never finished."

"Lori, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Yeah, go on. I can talk now."

"Tina asked if we could go down to your place as a get away for a few day. She would like some peace and quiet."

"What about her court appointed sessions?"

"There's a centre in Te Kuiti."

"I don't have an issue with you staying there, but what about the girls?"

"Renatta is here, and she is really good with them."

"What about the other girls?"

"That's what I was talking about. She's amazing with Honey and Kaylee, but she's awesome with the other girls as well. I think it would be a great getaway for Tina, and the probation officer thinks so, as well."

"She's got her own key. You'll need to pick up food on the way, and while you're there. I think I can find you some work."

'Typical, slave driver."

"How's Tina dealing with the night terrors and sweats?"

the long extended pause gave me cause for concern. "Tab... Are you still there?"

"Yeah, I'm here. Tina has been sleeping with me. I was nervous about leaving her alone."

"When did this start?"

"A couple of days ago. Tina seemed to be having a bad day, so I suggested she sleep with me,"

"Get much sleep did you?"

"Lori, this is two friends helping each other out. There has been no sex."

"Kissing?"

Again the pause. "Don't call me anymore, Tab. We'll settle this when I get home, or back to your place."