Love in the Lockdown

* * * * *

The following night was Thursday. I had removed a few palings so Sue and I could have an unrestricted view of each other. I brought a folding deck chair from home which was a little more comfortable to the wooden picnic table and attached bench seat.

Sue was lounging in a wooden deck chair which looked even more comfortable than mine. She was wearing a frock. Sue was a classic blonde nurse. She wore little or no make-up, a fuller figure and quite busty. Her frock was floral and could have been a uniform with her comfortable flats. She was a homely woman with an innate sexiness. Part of this was her confidence. It was the type of confidence nurses often have. I suppose they are used to ordering people around. She was sitting there smoking with her long bushy blonde hair loosely pinned back.

"Why do so many nurse smoke?"

"Because we can?" The reply was posed as a question her voice rising.

"It seems almost as though you are revolting against your own profession."

"There might be something in that. I am always telling myself I am giving up; it's a bit expensive these days. I am actually a trained ICU nurse, head nurse actually in my last job, and I have worked overseas in some dodgy places so there you are."

"Why are you working in public health if you are not trained for that. It would be a drop in pay I take it."

"I fucked too many doctors and got into a scandal when I was sprung by a wife in the sleep over facility. They were looking to sack me; I was already fucking dear Simon as well and had this bright idea of coming up here. It was a kind of face saving position for them and me."

I obviously looked a bit stunned with this last comment and Sue felt the need to elaborate, "Sorry, I was a bit blunt. I have a pretty healthy libido; I am probably a bit of an addict if you can be addicted to sex. It seems to get me into trouble. Even when I was in Somalia I managed to get pregnant. I have a black kid somewhere."

"Shouldn't you be getting some kind of treatment for it?"

"You are probably right. It did not seem to be an imperative when I was enjoying myself but everything has turned to shit. So here we are you and I, a couple of miserable waifs and we cannot even hug because we are each in our own bubble." Sue continued, "Which reminds me, I take it you have not heard from Fleur? You look really depressed."

"I am, I am, I don't know what to think, I feel so helpless. I can't go looking anywhere. I don't know where to look, her car has gone, she could be absolutely anywhere. We have a look out covering the entire north island but it's drawn a blank so far."

"Have you spoken to Pamela?"

"Briefly, but I need to get back to her because when we spoke we did not discuss the possibility of them being together."

"Approaching her is going to be awkward then. If you talk to her, ask her if they have some kind of bach or fishing lodge."

My ears pricked with that one.

"As he got one, really?"

"Whoa, calm down. Short answer is I don't know; I just suspect he does. Never been there, never discussed it with him but he does a lot of fly fishing on one particular stream and he must stay somewhere."

"Wherever they are it seems they are out of range of cell phone coverage."

"There you are; a line of enquiry then."

"Hey we are a good team," I was feeling a little more enthused.

"And you are easy on the eyes as well so I have no objection to being on your team."

And so a mild flirting began.

* * * * *

Friday I thought we had cracked it.

Early morning I rang Pamela. There was no easy way of putting it.

"Have you heard yet from Simon?"

"No."

"But you haven't filed a missing person report?"

"Oh I think I know where he is."

"Where is that?"

"I actually don't know exactly but he has a cabin. I haven't been there as he only bought it recently, although he had been renting it on and off for a while. He likes to catch trout; he is a bit of a loner that way."

"You know my wife is missing as well?"

"Are you suggesting they are together?"

"Possibly."

"Does she have a mini-cooper countryman?"

"Yes."

"Then they are together. My manager discovered a strange mini cooper parked in a derelict implement shed on our farm. It's actually beside some shearers quarters that Simon and I had done up and we use as a getaway. My manager would not normally ever go there but he was checking for me if Simon might have been there for some reason. I can't get there because of this COVID thing. It is out of our district anyway."

"You don't seem overly concerned."

"Oh I am, It's just I have suspected for a while. I decided it was pretty certain what's going on. The lockdown caught them out didn't it? I didn't know he was with your wife, but she works for Simon doesn't she? I thought he was with that bitch at the medical centre."

"If we can find out where this bach is, we can send someone there."

"I will look through our papers. Our lawyer must know but he seems to have disappeared off on some bubble of his own and seems to be incommunicado. I can tell you now I am going to separate from the bastard. I am going for divorce. I have carried the embarrassment for too long. He's in the shit and he'll have nothing from me. He can live in that bach for all I care. The guy can't help himself; he's got to be bent. He's a lousy father as well, my kids are afraid of him. I cannot for the life of me understand what I saw in him. He'll lose his job; my family have a controlling interest in that business and he is toast. Why, why does the silly shit have to do this stuff?"

I have to say I was a bit blown away by the rant.

It was later when I arrived at the station to start my shift; Sarge was there. "We have just had contact with your wife."

"And you didn't tell me?"

"I said, just. She arrived at the check point up north without that prick she is rooting trying to get back here. She was told by the cops she couldn't travel from one district to another and they turned her back. She seemed to have no idea that there had been a total lockdown. Sounds like your wife was pretty upset."

I decided there and then I no longer wanted to be a cop. There was no way I would put up with pricks like Sarge for the rest of my life.

"There must have been some way of getting her back; she is my wife for god sake."

Sarge shouted at me. "Mate, those are the rules, what if she was infected. Listen, harden up, she's rooting the bastard; get rid of her. When this is all over you can bonk Sue next door, I've heard she has the hots for you."

Hell, he was beyond disgusting. I slunk off; one of the wives had dropped off dinner for us and I hadn't eaten since getting up at Noon. I needed the solace of some food.

I thought about Sue. I felt a stirring, a lustful consolation.

I collected the plastic covered paper plate with the food. I did not feel like eating with the others so took it outside.

Sitting at the wooden table I took out my plastic knife and fork which came wrapped in a paper napkin. The food looked nice. It was roast chicken and vegetables with gravy; a simple good country meal.

I remembered I had turned off my phone. I reached into my tunic and took it out, turning it back on. There was an immediate ding of message waiting. I switched to voicemail, "You have one new message", and I pressed 1.

For the first time since Sunday I was listening to Fleur's voice. Her normal confidence was missing and she sounded as though she had difficulty in holding it together.

"I am so sorry Connor but I know my being sorry will not be enough. I want you to know that despite never having told you in so many words I have always loved you deeply but as events transpired not unconditionally. I know you did love me too; we are a pair aren't we. Why have we never told each other this? Despite my love for you, I know it is useless if I have destroyed your love for me. When I get back I hope fervently that we can salvage something from this. I am hoping you can understand that in the circumstances I felt I had no choice. I thought I could handle the situation but quite clearly I did not.

Unfortunately the events that lead me into this situation happened long ago. I am now forced to admit them, I suppose, and they alone will probably be enough to destroy your love for me.

We thought we could leave the past behind...well... It didn't work did it?" There was a sob, and a low wail. I'd never heard Fleur so emotional. She composed herself sniffing. "I don't want to give up Connor but I do understand how you will feel and what was done can never been undone."

The line continued open. I could hear the sound of her gently weeping until it sounded like she wanted say more but with that she clicked off. I began to cry. The emotion for me was hard. I was brought up a bloke. We don't cry. I sniffed; shit if Sarge found me like this, it would be extremely career limiting. I tried to think about other things. I needed some kind of help. Police do have a counselling service but the lock down had locked me out.

"Connor is that you?" It was Sue, she must have heard me.

"I am sorry Sue, I am not feeling the best."

"What's happened?"

"I just had a phone message from Fleur. She kind of admitted what she had done but she gave no detail."

"Oh, my god Connor; are you alright?"

"No, but I'll live. I guess it's my fault for marrying a girl of mystery. I always thought I was there to protect her. She felt safe with me, so she said, that's what attracted her to me. Well I failed her didn't I? I didn't read the signs whatever the signs were. Not much of a cop am I. I certainly would never be a detective."

"Connor, don't beat yourself up about it. None of us are superhuman. Shit happens."

"She said she would explain. It sound like there is something in her past that has led to this. I now regret ever getting married without really talking about this shit. We fooled ourselves into believing that only the future mattered. Denial is no basis for marriage."

Sue was silent; waiting for me to pour it all out. And I did. Sue was a good listener. I desperately wanted to hold her. The tension through that gap in the fence was almost unbearable. I stared at Sue's face. There was an utter look of compassion. I thought she must be a wonderful nurse. I wanted to kiss her. Hell, I wanted to fuck her. I became acutely aware of her body. Sue could see me staring at her, scanning her. Her gaze fixed on me, with her right hand; she reached up and cupped her left breast.

Was that involuntary?

I turned away. This was stupid, we could not touch. I started heavy breathing to calm myself down. I became aware of my erection. I looked up; Sue was smiling, eyes on my fly.

"If only." She whispered without a hint of embarrassment.

I returned her smile, "Ooh that was not so lady like, methinks!"

"I feel free; I am not seeing a gentleman anywhere."

"You wait for the lockdown to end."

"Is that a promise?"

I just smiled. After all I was still married, I suppose.

I heard nothing from Fleur the following day. I found myself thinking more about Sue than Fleur, stirring a sexual tension in anticipation of our next meeting.

"Is that you, Connor?" her voice from behind the fence. It was later than usual, I had long had dinner. It was dark and the bulkhead lamp under the eve was shining shafts of bright yellow light across the black yard. Sue's outside light was not on but I could see her plainly through the gap in the fence lounging back, the same dress as yesterday looped between her legs which were relaxed and spread apart. I had an urge to peer up the dress. Sue caught me glancing at that space between her legs. She murmured, "Nice us being alone and private, I see you a feeling what I have been feeling." Her eyes were on my crotch, she shifted her dress to expose more of her thighs.

"Why don't you sit down and relax while we enjoy one another?"

We sat there in silence just looking at each other's eyes.

"I take it you have heard no more from Fleur?" The atmosphere dipped slightly at this distraction.

"No, and I have not really thought about her much today. There is nothing much I can do but wait it out. She has him, end of story. I have been thinking about you actually."

"Me, little old me? My goodness me what would you be thinking about me for?"

My reply was to betray Fleur's confidence. We had never spoken with anyone else about her London profession.

"I have not told you before but Fleur was an escort in London. She would have seen a lot of sex with a lot of men and made a bit of money from it all. From what you have told me you admit to being quite the promiscuous girl and you seem very seductive."

"If you are asking if I have ever been on the game, no I have not; never taken money for it."

"Shagging doctors then is part of your altruistic behaviour as a nurse then?"

I suppose most women would be insulted at me bitterly talking like this but I was rapidly finding having conversation with Sue easy, raw and without any kind of malice on such subjects. I think she understood my situation and just compensated for it.

"Not only shagging doctors, anybody really. When god handed out libido's I suppose I got more than my share. So you weren't worried about sharing Fleur with the vast hordes."

"We weren't together then and no, it does not worry me. It is only a matter of numbers compared with most women I have been with. It worries me now though. It is not the sex, it is just when you are married you expect commitment, well I do anyway. Commitment is the key to marriage, even more than love."

"Are you not in love with Fleur?"

"I am, I suppose, among the hotch-potch of feelings and emotions there is a collective that must add up to love. No, in my mind it is the betrayal of commitment that is the killer. To bring up children in a stable family there must be total commitment. Whatever was there before the marriage stays there. If there is no commitment, how can you trust someone to be there through thick and thin?"

"I had not thought about it in so many words. I suppose that has been my problem. I am unwilling or unable to commit."

"I doubt that, I mean you made the move up here for fuck knuckle. That must have been an urge to commit."

"Perhaps you are right; only to have it thrust back in my face."

A short silence and a change of tack.

"You were in Somalia, Did you ever know a doctor by the name of Duncan Barnard."

"What Duncan? I certainly did. I mean I never shagged him. Neither did I work directly with him but I knew him well socially. He had a hell of a reputation, really nice, absolutely dedicated top guy. How do you know him?"

"He's my Mother's brother; kind of a favourite uncle."

"Wow, I am impressed. He has never married has he?"

"You want an introduction?"

"Er no. I don't think he is gay but he does not show a lot of interest in the opposite sex. More married to his job I suspect. Well it seems I am in the company of medical royalty."

"That's a bit over the top. It's only him."

"I can imagine you a doctor. Not a specialist. You are too nice. You would make a great GP; easy to talk with, empathic, lovely smile. All the women patients would fall in love with you. You would have to watch that."

As she was saying this, she lifted her skirt a little. It seemed a deliberate action exposing some soft pink semi transparent panties. One hand went to her breast the other was draped lazily over a creamy white thigh. I felt my cock stiffen as I stared at the action. Emboldened by my stare Sue silently moved her hand as she widened her legs a little. She began to rub her panties creasing her camel toe. With her other hand she massaged her breast as it rose and fell with her deepening breath. Copying Sue and not taking my eyes off her I laid my hand upon my now erect cock straining my trousers.

"What would you give for a good revenge romp right now? Me? I need a good pounding. If I could I would have that thing in your pants up my jacksy before you had time to think."

I began to massage my cock; my desire was thumping in my ears. I had never done this sort of thing so brazenly. I so wanted her. "Shit, if there was some way."

"I'm looking at you, your uniform, hi-vis, radio, body armour and I want to see your cock. Go on show me." Sue lifted her hand; her panties were now soaked and worked into her slit, with a good deal of juiced honey hair showing.

I became aware of myself in full uniform slouched in my chair rubbing my cock. A wave of reality and embarrassment swept over me. On the other side of the gap Sue was not giving up, she pulled her panties tight over her fanny, their transparency plainly exposing her pink flesh breaking through her thick unkempt pubic hair. "This fucking bitch is in heat and one way or another I want your puppies, Connor." Sue's face was bright read, a girl in oestrus. It wasn't going to be tonight but I was determined then to have Sue. Whatever her attributes Sue had the imperceptible quality of sexual attraction above all else, she simply looked and smelt of sex; what was lacking was the touch.

I pulled myself together. "Shit, I think Sarge is due in shortly, I muttered. Shall we make this a regular thing?" Shit, what was I saying? I hadn't meant sex... or had I? Besides I was still technically married.

Sue gave me a benign smirk. She recognized the Freudian slip. "I'll lay on a good spread for you."

With that I was up and making my way into the back door of the station.

The back area of the station was quite private. There was no access to it other than through the station itself. The car park was to the side any car pulling in could be heard easily. There was no oversight to the courtyard from the neighbours. The medical centre was similar; these areas just provided for a pleasant out door area to have lunch, a coffee or in Sue's case a smoke.

The following night I was already there when Sue arrived. This night she was wearing a blouse. She sat down, hardly looking at me and immediately began unbuttoning her blouse and with a deft action she pulled down one cup of her lacy red bra to reveal one large breast which when released sprang out and over the cup. She had a large well defined rosy nipple surrounded with the wide pink of her areola. She let me stare at it for a while then she scooped it up so that the nipple could be reached from her lips and she began to suck. She sucked hard and then releasing the now scarlet nipple, she began to suck just to the side until releasing it and leaving a red hickey.

"That's yours", she said. "It arrived by astral travel; a thought transfer."

"While I am doing that can you thought transfer your cunt onto my dick?"

"Oooh talking dirty now are we? Wow, imagine that. Let's just sit here and imagine fucking by thought transfer. You first, tell me what you are doing."

"Ok, Ok, My soul is leaving my clothes."

"Are you naked?"

"Yes, clothes don't have a soul silly. I am flying through the air and am now hovering over you. I am stretched right out with my dick hanging down. It is growing."

"Oooh growing. How long is it?"

"About 30 centimetres."

"That's long, will it fit?"

"It's an angelic one. It will fit anywhere. OK you are rising naked out of you clothes."

"I am feeling it."

"You are rising to face me...face to face. Your legs are wrapping around me as my dick slips into your cunt. Oooh you are so tight but I just manage to slide it in. We embrace and we begin to thrust in sync...We are weightless and begin to rotate as we float... Shit what's that?"

"Phones ringing."

"Bugger! I was enjoying that. Better go."

The following night I was first again. Sue sat down wearing her floral dress. They were sitting in the half light, the sun just having just set. It was a cooler evening with a slight hazy mist drifting about the town from a number of home fires burning.