Loving Lydia

"Oh, my." She licks her lips and wraps her arms around me. "I've never felt anything like that."

I move to the side of the bed, pulling her along with me. She rests her head against my chest. "Glad you enjoyed it." We bask in the post-orgasmic glow until I break the silence. "You must be hungry, let me get our food."

I wrap a small cloth around me and open the door to find our dinner there.

"When did that come?" She sits up in surprise. She pulls back the covers enough to shift under them and thanks me when I give her a dish.

"I think it was when I was playing with your gorgeous breasts." I sit next to her and dig into the lukewarm soup. I probably should have stopped what we were doing to enjoy it better. "I hope it's not too cold for you." I look up to find her staring at me.

Her cheeks turn a cute pink but she shakes her head.

We eat in silence and I retrieve our dishes and silverware when we finish.

I blow out the candles around the room. There is still enough moonlight coming from the windows to guide me back to the same bed as Lydia. I can see the relief in her eyes and she pulls me close once we're both securely under the sheets.

"I didn't know how badly I wanted you to come until I saw you in the cottage." My fingers run across her wet hair. "I really thought I was doing the right thing by pushing you away from this life."

She sighs and puts her chin on my shoulder to look at me.

"I've had time to think about it. And although I never saw myself doing what you do, I can't deny that it is the right thing to do. Being with you is a bonus."

"You say that now, but it isn't as glorifying as you would imagine. Hell, it is a thankless job. We do it because it is part of who we are now." This is the last of my arguments. If this doesn't scare her away, I don't know what will. "You won't be able to live a normal life. You won't get to have a family."

"Timmy and Cindy are doing just fine." She counters.

I shake my head. "Timmy and Cindy had to seek shelter with me because they were almost found out. They're bringing a child into this life and hoping for a better future." I don't want to get into my disagreement with their choices but she has to know this is what she is asking to be a part of.

"Why can't you just accept that I only want you?" Her eyes are hard and her lips set in a disapproving line.

I lean down to kiss her scowl away. "Fine." I pull her head against mine. "Just know that now I will never let you go."

She chuckles. After a moment of silence she whispers, "I sold everything. My house, the land, the cottage."

It shouldn't catch me by surprise, considering she's here, but deep down I always pictured her going back one day. Wanting to pick up where she left off. And yet, I know I wouldn't be able to do the same if she ever did. Our love could never prevail in a town like that. It would only be accepted in the small family we have built with those who share our beliefs. So maybe she knew that too.

"Joseph was there when I went to the bank." She's staring out, recalling the memory. "I had to lie and say I was doing something else. He almost found out when Bev walked through the bank doors. But she caught my drift and we got away with it." Her smile is faint. "I'm sure he knows by now. No one does something that drastic without causing a stir."

"You sold everything to Bev?" That is a pleasant outcome. My thoughts turn to Jody and her vivid future.

She nods. "She is going to team up with Robert. I don't know if you remember him, but they're going to open a little shop. He's been a good friend to her and Jody. The bank gave her a loan and I got a good sum in return. And I offered Jody my teaching position at school."

"You really thought this all through." I whisper in awe.

"Of course, I did." She sasses back. "I've had this plan brewing for some time now. Was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I just needed enough time to do everything." She wraps an arm around my hip. "I do have something to ask of you though."

"Anything." I naturally respond.

"Don't go seeking revenge." She silences my dispute with her soft fingers against my lips. "It is the only thing I ask. They're not worth your energy. God will give them all what they deserve. And trust me, after finding you the way I did and getting to know how big your heart is, I would have liked nothing more than to get my hands on those sick bastards. But don't do it. Let go of that hate and focus on the good we can do."

It doesn't take much convincing to give her what she wants. She has never asked anything of me. Has never demanded that I pay her back or settle any debt. If I am being completely honest with myself, having her here is ultimately the only thing I ever wanted. Yes, I wish I could inflict the same pain that those men brought on to me, but if it was between getting my revenge or having the love of my life by my side for the rest of existence, it isn't even a question. And although I don't completely agree that they will be punished by the Lord above, I do believe that there is someone up there looking out for me. Otherwise, how could I have come out so lucky in the end?

I think through everything she has had to plan out and execute, all without me, and I know as surely as my name is Kit, that she will fit just right in with all of us. She's not the weak damsel, looking to be saved. Lydia is a kind, smart, ridiculously sexy, and a notably calculative individual. She's caring, forgiving, and doesn't have a single ill will in her being.

"I will do whatever you want me to." I kiss her palm and smile.

"Perfect." Her smile dazzles me and we kiss silently.

I trust her judgment as well as mine. Probably even more than mine considering everything she's had to go through from before I met her. She doesn't do things halfway. She commits 100 percent and I'm the idiot that took forever to see that. Loving Lydia might be the smartest thing I have ever done. I only hope that I can be her best match and treat her like the queen that she is.

The queen of my heart.