MilSpec Ch. 03

She finally urged me to stop, "Enough, my lover. I can't take any more. Will you still take me to ride Misty?" The girls came over to help her dress and I stopped them.

"I'll do it," I said, tears still falling. I dressed her in her best jeans, a tight sexy shirt and her boots. I asked for her jewelry box. Inside there was a necklace with her wedding ring and the symbol for prosperity on a pendant that I'd given her all those years ago. I put the chain on and found a promise ring that I'd given her and put that on her left index finger.

I lifted her up and carried her down to the horses. I checked cinches and loaded her aboard, then swung up on Stand. I walked us around the yard until she was done. Then I carried her back to her room. I laid her on the bed and her doctor came in.

"Are you sure, Mary," the doctor asked.

"Yes, Alice, I'm sure," she said, "I don't want to diminish and become a shell. I want to leave this life with some dignity. Please, he loves me, Charles loved me, they all love me. Let me die in peace, in my own bed, the feeling of his sex still on me."

The doctor administer the shot. "It will take about an hour. She'll simply fall asleep and never wake up. Say your goodbyes." Then the doctor left.

Mica came in then, with Duke in tow. He left Duke at the door and walked to his grandmother. "Mom told me, gramma." he said, "I had to say goodbye." Then he squared is shoulders and kissed his grandmother before saying, "I will see you, either in the Summerlands or in your next life. Return before mine ends. Be mine in love again, a son or daughter, lover or friend. I love you, cara cre (earth friend)."

Then he turned and walked out, Duke falling in behind him. We sat with her to the end. It was a half hour after she slept that her breathing stopped. I kissed her lips and smoothed her hair before I went to find Mica.

Mica was sitting on the porch swing. I sat next to him and we cried, silently, but the tears flowed. In the end, I held him and he sobbed into my chest. It was a tough time for us. The girls had all bonded with Mary, Liz was a contemporary, a friend from that time and Larry was full of compassion for others. But Mona was hit the hardest. She'd lost her mother. Liz knew what that was like. I did, though I was young when that happened. So, Liz and Mona grew closer and Larry spent more time with me.

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It was six weeks after Mary's death when I went to visit Liz's children. I had sent them invitations for a lavish dinner in a great restaurant and they just showed up. I was sitting there alone, in a suit. I stood when they arrived, together. I think they were prepared to gang up on me.

"Hello Robert, Stephanie, Charles and Jenny," I said and shook their hands. I had name tags on their places and they sat with quizzical looks on their faces. "I know, kind of strange isn't it? Well, let's just clear that part of the air right away. I wanted to sit down and talk to you. So, I invited you to come."

"You didn't bring mom?" asked Jenny. I had actually expressly stated I would not bring Liz along.

"Or one of your other women?" asked Robert sounding just a touch angry.

"Nope, I only brought me," I said. "I fully expect that you are upset with me. I didn't feel it was fair to subject people I love to that kind of emotional baggage. I thought I could give you an opportunity to tell me off, tell me how you feel, or allow you the freedom to say what you want to me without fear or worry about hurting your mother or someone else." I looked around at them and waited then spoke again just before Robert chimed in. "But there is a price." Then I waited and Robert spoke first again.

"What do you mean, a price?" he asked bluntly.

"After you are done, you listen to me," I said. "I let you say anything you want to say. Then you listen to what I want to say. Then we talk together like adults and figure out where we go from there."

They looked at one another, still a little confused because no one does that. I was proposing I would let them say anything to me they wanted, first. They could leave if they wanted when they were done. I had no way to stop that.

"Okay, then I will start," said Jenny. "Who are you to come into my mom's life and just turn it upside down? She has turned into some kind of sex fiend, kissing women and God knows what else. Living in a sexual relationship with a married man, and his wife, and another woman. It makes me so sad to know that the grandmother of my child is living like this. I mean, I understand you, you're a man, but she is a judge, and she's almost 48 years old. What did you do to my mother?"

I turned to Robert and waited. "How can you sit there like that? You seem so smug, so self righteous. This lifestyle you have chosen is against the law. It is immoral, unethical, it is wrong. I don't understand. She doesn't have a lot of money. Now you are going to what, take the last of what she has? How will we help her when you toss her back for another younger model? How can you be so cruel and say you love her?"

"Thank you for sharing," I said honestly. "I know that's probably just the surface of what you are feeling right now. I took the liberty of ordering a meal already. There are three entrees and you can choose any of them, but the salmon is exceptionally good. Just pick one, place the placard on your little plate. The soup and salad should be here in a moment."

The server came around with drinks, Jenny skipped the wine and I had them bring her sparkling cider instead. Salads were served and small jars of dressing placed on the table. I'd already met them a few weeks earlier. So, I knew about their jobs and some things. During the meal, I think they kept waiting for me to light into them. I didn't. They were concerned and it was laudable. They loved their mother. They had wanted to like me, but didn't understand.

"So, I would love to answer your questions, but I think some of them are not really great questions," I started and paused, "Let me take that back. They are great questions, but the assumptions that underlie the questions lack understanding. So I thought I would start there."

"You all know your mother is not a Christian, right?" I asked and they nodded.

"She is part of the Kinship, a pagan group, right?" asked Stephanie.

"Exactly, but what is it really?" I asked. "That was rhetorical. The Kinship is a group of pagans, mostly Celtic and Norse, with a few others scattered in. They've been practicing their faith since before Jesus was born. We have certain beliefs that differ from those practiced in American society. One of those is polyamory."

"Where a man can have multiple wives," said Jenny with obvious distaste.

"No, it is a concept of loving more than one person at a time," I said. "It is not men with many women. It is people loving who they love. Sometimes it is sexual, sometimes it is not. But Jesus referred to it in his teaching. Love one another. That was his one commandment. There is more to it than that though. When a man died in the old testament, the women went to live with one of his relatives as his wife. The man's brother, father, uncles and grandfather were considered in that order. If they were not available, she went to her own side, her brother, father, uncles and grandfather. All regardless of whether they were married or not. She became as another wife to that person. That was kind of a sexist view from the Kinship way of looking at it, but that is how it was for the Jews."

"Even setting that aside though, let me ask this," I said. "Do you love your brother/sister? Yet you love your spouse, how is that possible? Let's say someone has five brothers and sisters. How can that person love them all if it is one on one? Or grandparents, most people have four, how can they love four people? Two parents, how can they love both of them? This is the basis for polyamory. Not every member of the Kin is polyamorous. Not all polys are sexual lovers. It is individual."

"Your mom loved your dad," I told them baldly, "she told me about it. She misses him still. When my girl in High School dropped me because I was going to be a soldier, your mom and I hooked up and fell in love. I went off to war, she went off to law school. I didn't stop loving her, just like I didn't stop loving Mary. She didn't stop loving me, but fell in love with your dad. She was happy, fulfilled. Then he died and she lived for work."

I paused and sipped my sparkling cider, "I came home after thirty years of service. We reconnected. I fell in love with Mona and rediscovered my love for Liz. I'm not turning her life upside down. She makes her decisions. I try my hardest not to influence those decisions. Not hers, nor Mona's, nor Laramie's. They are adults, I don't tell them what to think or be. The lifestyle we have chosen is not illegal. It could be considered immoral only if you believe that your religion has the market cornered on morality, which attitude in and of itself is immoral by definition. As for taking what she has, well, I am a millionaire, I don't want what she has. I won't even let her give it to me."

I leaned forward and got intense, "You have to understand, I love your mom with every fiber of my being. If she wants something, she will have it if it is within my power. She loves each of us at this table the same way. When you stormed out of our house, she broke down and cried. She was devastated for days. I'm here for her. I'm here because I love her, like I love air. I'm here because she loves you, exactly like that. But she can't give up on her own happiness for you and if you loved her half as much as you claim, you would never ask her to do that."

"So, there is a dessert tray. Eat something. Yell at me. Ask me questions, whatever. But please, don't cut her out of your lives. Love her like she loves those she loves, without reservation, wide open."

I sat back and shut my mouth. They sat stunned for a bit, and we ate dessert. They asked some questions, I answered and in the end, they gave me a small hug and left. I got a call from them a few weeks later.

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Two months later, Larry told us she was pregnant. "I was always told that I couldn't have a baby. My gynecologist explored and said the egg just got past the scaring on my fallopian tube. Of course, I was concerned with my other condition and she told me that there was no doubt she would take the baby by C section."

We were all very excited. It was a wonder of new life in a time when one was lost. "What about you, Liz, are you wanting one too?" asked Mona one day.

"Gods above, no," she said, "I had my two kids. It was hard and painful and I don't want to do it again. But I will love and cherish any you two have. We are mommies, parents of the children born of this love filled union. I feel truly blessed to share this life with the three of you. Two beautiful, loving women and this big loving man. I never thought I could be so happy again. But, I think I will retire and play the grandma, live here on the ranch and love my family."

"You know I spoke with your kids a few weeks ago," I said.

"I was afraid to ask," she said, "How did it go?"

"Well, they gave me the third degree," I said, "They love the hell out of their mom. Jenny is expecting by the way. You will actually be a grandma in about five months." When I told her, her eyes went wide and her hand covered her mouth.

"Oh goddess be praised," she said with a huge smile.

"Maybe now, you will start joining us for Tai Chi," I said as I pulled her to my lap. "You know, I want you around for a long time. My doctor says I could live until ninety. Dying before me will not be allowed. Plus, I know your little grandbaby will want grandma for a long, long time."

She looked up at me, "And grandpa too? Did they accept you, honey?"

"In the end, I think they did," I said, "They get it, about Kin, but they turned from that path. They never saw poly with you and your husband. So, they really don't understand. But they accept that I love you, that you love me and that we love those other two gorgeous women. They are coming over for Solstice."

"Really, Jack, really?" she said with a small amount of tears, "I thought I lost them last year when they stormed out."

I slid my hand up under her sun dress and stroked her thighs, "I know, and I told you I would talk to them," I said, "How could anyone not love me? I am love incarnate."

"When you touch me like that, lover," she said, "I feel it down to my toes. Light a cigar and let's watch the sunset, together. You can share as we make love."

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To say the pregnancy was hard for Larry would be an understatement. She ended up on bed rest for the final two months, only allowed minor exercise walks around the house a couple times a day or to get up for the bathroom. But she delivered a healthy baby girl who we named Daisy Jane.

"Oh baby, she is beautiful, like a little copy of her mother," I said. I was laying in the bed with her at the time as she was just out of recovery.

She moaned a bit and winced, "Oh lover, I am so glad that is over. I hope you won't be sad if I never do that again."

"No, my love," I said to her while I stroked her face and Mona gave her a little drink of water. "You never have to get pregnant again."

"Goddess above," she said with real deep emotion. "I love the shit out of the three of you. I never thought I could ever be this happy inside myself." she kissed me gently, then Mona and Liz, before snuggling in tight. "I need to sleep off some more of the meds though, honey, is that okay?"

"Yes, my Laramie," I said. "Sleep, recharge, one of us will be right here when you wake up."

She slept and we rotated someone there at all times. She was in the hospital for three days and when she came home, she got to sleep in the master bedroom all the time. Liz slept in with the babies and took care of them at night. Changing and feeding, though she used a special contraption that was designed to mimic breastfeeding and used the pumped milk. Within three months, we were all three back in the big bed and back to mostly normal. James slept through the night within six months, but Daisy was a year.

Life settled into a routine after that. We had a dozen horses now and were selling the new colts locally. Mica was turning into quite the horse trainer as well as a dog trainer. Duke actually won some ribbons and Mica trained and kept a horse he named Princess, a cream colored mare with an exceptional coat and a dark mane and tail.

"Hey, buddy?" I interrupted him one day. "Got a minute?"

"Sure dad, just let me finish with Princess and I'll meet you..." he paused so I'd tell him where.

"The shop," I said. I'd kept him away for a few days now and he was a bit curious. He showed it with a grin.

"Okay, dad, five minutes," he said and went back to brushing his horse.

He came into the shop about six minutes later. I knew that because I was waiting somewhat impatiently. Mona was there at the little table we put in that had been displaced by the next project car, which I slid in next to the 57 Chevy we were almost finished with.

Liz and Larry were there as well, standing back a bit and holding the babies. As he came in, he could see the Happy Birthday banner and the small pile of presents. We started singing immediately, "Happy Birthday to you..." He smiled of course, knowing we were probably doing it, but not sure why we were in the shop.

"So, we all wanted to get you something special, Mica," I said. "You are fourteen and well, we think you are one of the best kids around. Liz?"

Liz handed me Daisy and moved to the shadows, then rolled out a large standing tool chest that was filled with tools. "This is for working on cars with your dad." He teared up and hugged her tight, and she continued, "See, not like Cinderella at all."

Larry went next, passing JP to Liz, "I got you that new game you wanted, oh, and of course, the game system to play it, though you hardly play much any more." That was the pile of boxes and left nothing visible.

"Your dad and I, we wanted to get your something extra special," Mona said and turned on the rest of the shop lights. I handed Daisy to Larry and moved to the covered vehicle and pulled off the cover. Beneath it was a 49 Mercury, the kind he had been looking at over the years. It was all kinds of mucked up, but the body was solid and there was no rust. "This will be your car. Your dad thinks you two will finish it about the time you can get your license."

Mica threw himself into Mona's arms and then mine, and finally, hugged Liz and Larry. "You guys are the best parents in the world!"