Mistress Mom Ch. 1 of 2

I thought about it for a second, then I said:

"Well... speaking for myself ... I think it is."

"You think so?"

"Yes. I've had sex. And that's great. Having sex is great. I just keep coming back to the idea that there's more. I don't think I have to have sex all the time ... I want to ... explore things, challenge myself, step out of my comfort zone... There's so much stuff that's not about sex! I mean, whipping and pain thresholds... bondage and suspensions... cool outfits... And ... well, we've talked about this online, if you recall ... Part of the reason why I think I want to submit to someone is that I'm turned on by the idea that it's not about my satisfaction, but someone else's. That a woman gets off on doing things to me... it's a really tempting idea. And sure, I'd probably be aroused around you - who wouldn't be? But that's part of what I'm looking for. You know? Being tempted, but not being allowed to have gratification. Being toyed with by an attractive woman who does what she wants, not what I want ... that's what it's all about, right?"

During this whole speech, mom sat still and smiled at me, just taking in what I had to say, probably forming her own opinions based on what I said and how I said it. Eventually, she jumped in.

"And if we start this up, and you find that it's not right for you? That you need something other than what I can provide?"

"Then we can stop, right?" I replied. "BDSM isn't like real slavery, so I could always just say that it's not working out for me, we end it there and part on good terms. Or you could end it, if you think that either of us should find someone that's more... compatible. I respect your opinion, you're much more experienced at this than I am."

"Again... a mature attitude... You definitely show promise, I won't lie. And you're right - it usually takes a while to find out just how compatible we are. As we try different things over several sessions, some are likely to work very well and some might not, and we develop together as we go."

"You speak as if you... does this mean..."

"Not yet." she interrupted.

"Right. No. Sorry."

She took a breath, leaned back and relaxed in her chair, smiling and looking at me.

"Tell me about your limits again."

"They're .. uh... yeah, I have the list on my profile..." I said, fishing my phone out of my pocket.

She leaned forward again, put her hand on mine and gently pushed it down on the table, keeping it there until I put the phone down.

"Don't read. I like talking. Talk to me." she said, still smiling encouragingly.

"Well, as you know..."

"Yes?"

"No permanent or visible injuries." I said quickly, remembering from my list but also just saying what I knew was not for me.

"Of course. What else?"

"No scat or urine - that's just nasty to me... doesn't excite me at all..."

"Yes, that's one of my dislikes too. Let's not kink shame, though. Next?"

I looked at her while trying to remember that list I'd written down earlier. It had taken some time to build up, so it was a bit hard coming up with all of it on the spot. Looking at her, though, I saw how different her appearance was in comparison with her ordinary everyday look. You'd need to look closely to recognize her, and that reminded me of another point on my list.

"Hmm... Yeah, like you, I'm not ... out. I wouldn't want to find naked pictures of me on the internet. At least not ones that show who I am."

"Question..." she interjected. "Does that mean pictures that are not identifiable would be acceptable?"

"Yes..."

"Even if they show you in very humiliating situations?"

I could feel a nervous tickling sensation in my stomach. I wondered what kind of "very humiliating situations" she had in mind. The answer was still clear, though.

"Yes. As long as people out there can't tell it's me."

"What about video?"

"Hm... the same applies, I guess."

"So if I commanded you to have sex with someone while I watch, filmed it and put it online, would that be within the limits...?"

At first, I was a bit confused, given the talk we'd just had, but then the penny dropped.

"Uuh... Oh! Uhm... right... yeah, I guess it would be possible to have sex with other people, wouldn't it... even though it's not ... happening between ... you and me. Ehm... Hm... I've never actually made porn before, but... I guess?"

"Thank you. More?"

"Yeah... since you mention the sex part... I'm not gay... or bi... so none of that. I mean, it's fine if people are... I've actually got a study buddy who's gay, but... well, I'm not interested in..."

"Not willing to." she interjected.

"Yes, I'm not willing to have any ... intimate play... with other men. I just..."

"... don't swing that way. I understand. Question: if I were to... say... command you to engage in a threesome, where you and another man have sex with the same woman. How would you respond to this?"

"I suppose I ... well... ehm... I could probably do that. As long as there's nothing going on between me and him."

That idea actually sounded really exciting. I'd never had a threesome before. Images from a thousand porn films showing hot threesomes passed before my eyes. Already, my horny brain had started imagining myself being in a situation like that. I could tell by mom's facial expression that she seemed to like the idea too.

"Understood. Next? I seem to remember there was something about needles?"

"Yes, now... actually, I may have had second thoughts on that."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, after reading up on it, I think... I mean, I don't really have a phobia of needles, and it's mostly just about pain, isn't it...?"

"Can be. For some people it's an art form, or psychological."

"Well... yeah, as long as it's done properly, with sterile needles and by someone who knows what they're doing... I don't think I need to put that on my hard limit list. Depends a bit where on the body they go, though. Not in the face, for instance... or through my... you know."

"All right. Next."

"Hmmm.... Yeah... since I'm a male sub ... There's that feminization thing I read about. You know about my... thing... right?"

She nodded, fully aware that I'd had a somewhat bad experience at the hands of some bullies at my school during childhood. The event had left some scars. Mental ones.

"Makeup." she said, remembering.

"Yeah, it's ... I can't do that. I read about some guys who like to dress up in drag, using lots of makeup to make them look like women ... Just the idea of it... it just makes me feel bad in a not-so-good way... if you know what I mean."

"Yes. Question: does this also include wearing ladies underwear?"

I thought about it for a second. She waited patiently, taking a sip of her drink and not rushing me for an answer. Admittedly, my aversion was restricted to wearing makeup, so even though the idea sounded embarrassing, it wasn't really ... bad bad.

"I ... don't ... think so." I eventually mumbled.

I could see her eyes lighting up and she gave me a wicked smile.

"Oh, man, I've just talked myself into being dressed up in lingerie, haven't I..."

"Maybe." she said, still smiling. "It may be a good way to humiliate a sub, or punish him... At least it's a possibility I may or may not avail myself of ..."

"I see that. And if it pleases my mistress, I guess it could be ... g-good... in a way."

We continued going through my list of no-nos and discussing the things I wasn't sure about. She was really helpful in this regard, patiently asking me simple questions on how I felt about all sorts of things, making me think through whether something was really on my list of things I absolutely didn't want... or just on the list of things I thought would make me feel embarrassed or used, but wasn't actually too bad. Also, she didn't pressure me to move the boundaries I set up myself - she was very understanding, and very considerate of my needs and wants. Of course, I already knew that - we'd had similar talks like this one already. It was just very nice to have one face to face.

Eventually, she nodded and ended the talk.

"Okay..." she said with a heavy sigh. "I think I've heard enough for today. I need some time to think about this. Can you meet me here again tomorrow, same time?"

"Yes."

"All right. See you then."

And just like that, the meeting was over. The weirdest meeting of my life.

Mom stood up and left, leaving me to ponder nervously about our conversation. As I left a few minutes after her, I was still thinking about it. As I watched TV that same evening, I was still thinking about it. As I lay awake in my bed at 2 a.m., unable to sleep, I was still thinking about it. Nothing had ever made me this nervous before. Part of me actually wanted her to turn me down; somehow, the possibility that she might say yes scared me more than getting a no. If she said no, very little would change in my life. If she said yes, though... whole other ball game.

I went to the club again the following afternoon, still thinking about how this whole thing made my stomach fill with butterflies. Entering the club a couple of minutes late, I immediately spotted my mom sitting at the same table as before. She gave me a discreet wave and I made my way over to her, sitting down and accepting the big glass of Coke she'd ordered for me.

"Cheers." she said, taking a sip of her own.

"Cheers."

She had on the same outfit, except that the blouse was different. This one was dark blue and just like the last one, it was well suited to the leather she was wearing, and equally unable to hide the shape of her large breasts.

"You look beautiful." I said, honestly impressed with the level at which she rocked that outfit.

"Thank you. Would you like to look a bit closer? Get it out of your system?"

"Uhm... what do you mean?"

She leaned forward.

"Take a good look. It may be your last chance."

I let my eyes drop and took in the sight of the gorgeous dominatrix across the table. Sitting within arm's reach was an incredibly sexy, mature woman, clad in leather and silk fabric. Her charisma was amazing, it felt like she was dominating the whole room with her mere presence. Experienced, self-assured, strong... as I saw it, she was the perfect domme. And nothing like the woman I knew as my mother.

As she leaned back to sip from her drink, I lifted my gaze again and met her eyes. Not quite knowing what to say, I said nothing, waiting for her to start the conversation instead.

"So ... I assume you've been thinking some more about this whole thing?" she asked.

"Yeah..." I exhaled, deciding to be completely honest. "You know... I had a hard time sleeping last night. I lay awake, nervous... thinking about..."

"Afraid I'm going to say no?"

"No. That you're going to say yes."

"Oh?"

She smiled slyly, but also looked a bit surprised.

"Yeah. It would mean ... a lot. It would be a big deal. A no would mean that nothing really changes for me, but a yes could ..."

"... change your life."

"Yeah."

"I felt the same way the first time I went into something like this."

She looked at me and smiled sympathetically, like she knew what I was going through. The nervousness, the not knowing what lay ahead, not having experienced anything quite like this before... I had a feeling she probably knew exactly what it was like.

"So... care to put me out of my misery?" I said. "Which is it, a yes or a no?"

"Neither. It's a maybe."

"O...kay. Um... Not the answer I was expecting. Uh... I'm ... confused."

"Don't be. We're still talking. This is a negotiation."

"I see... Okay ... oh, right... yes, I see now. You want to know more about... things. Before deciding."

"Yes. We need to communicate. Diving headlong into something like this without talking to a prospective partner about what you actually want... what you're envisioning for your relationship... that's a rookie mistake. And I'm no rookie."

"I am. So I'm glad I'm having this talk with you."

She leaned forward again, putting her finger under my chin as if to keep me from lowering my gaze. We locked eyes.

"First, let's talk rules."

"Yes."

"Rule number one: this doesn't go beyond the sessions. We keep our personas separate. When I'm your mistress, I'm not your mother. When I'm your mother, I'm not your mistress. This is important. When we go to Aunt Becky's for Christmas brunch, we both have to forget everything about this and behave like it hasn't happened. Mistress Anne is not your mother, and your mother is not Mistress Anne."

I nodded in agreement. She was probably right - it was the only way this was going to have a chance of working.

"This is important for both of us." she went on. "If I'm going to get past the familial relation and be able to enjoy myself, I'll need to be in my headspace. I need to ... well, you've heard of method acting? I need to really get into the role and be the mistress, a person who is not related to you."

"I get that. With the outfits and everything, right...?"

"Yes... I mean, if it helps, I can also change my appearance even more than this. A mask, maybe, and changing my voice... That way, you wouldn't be constantly reminded of who I am every time you look at me... We can do the same thing with you; get you a mask ... or a hood. I'd consider doing that anyway for anonymity... you know... for photos and such. Just makes things easier. But it would certainly help my mindset as well."

"That could work." I said thoughtfully, nodding.

"So what do you think? Do you think it's possible for you? To see me as two completely different people?"

I thought about it for a minute, honestly considering whether I would ever be able to separate her personas completely. In the end, I wasn't sure.

"I think so... Maybe...? I mean, I can't be sure, 'cause I've never done this before... with anybody, but..."

"Dammit."

"Was that a bad answer?"

"No. It's the best..." she sighed. "You know, some guys will do or say almost anything to get a session with a domme. You, on the other hand, are being honest, even though you know the answer might ruin your chances. Thing is... I'm not sure either. I feel the same way you do."

"So... do you want to try something? Something simple... maybe take it slow at first and... see if it works?"

"There you go again, taking the initiative, making perfectly reasonable suggestions like a mature and responsible adult. Damn you."

We both laughed. It felt good, relieving some of the tension. Eventually, she continued:

"The answer is maybe."

"Okay. I'll take that."

She continued.

"Rule number two: no direct sexual contact. I'm not gonna suck you off, I'm not gonna sit on your face and your cock isn't going anywhere near my pussy."

"Agreed." I said, nodding. "You have experience with that kind of relationship, right? It can work?"

"Oh, yes, definitely. I've been with several play partners where sex was not part of the deal. We just did other things. So yes, it can work. It just wasn't quite what I had in mind when I got to know you online, is all..."

Not what she had in mind? The implications of this dawned on me and caused my jaw to start dropping. Before she discovered who I was, she actually had plans to ...

"You were planning to..."

"Have sex with y... the man I was chatting with? Yes. In lots of dirty, depraved and interesting ways."

She winked and gave me a smile that clearly looked flirtatious - had she been any other person. The disappointment in me grew as I thought about the missed opportunities, having an amazing mistress play with me in ways I could only dream of. My mother's whole demeanor, her tone of voice, her outfit... it wasn't the woman I knew at all.

"It surprises you, hearing me talk dirty like this?" she said, still smiling.

"Uh yeah... it's definitely new. I mean ... well, we all know that our parents have a sex life, but it's not something we really think about, you know? But I guess... we're adults now, so we can talk more freely about it..."

"Yes, indeed. Well, when it comes to sex life, I've got a somewhat special one, honey. And there are lots of ways I can use sexual acts during play sessions... This is something I've been missing the last few years, so... Yeah, I did want to include it this time around."

"Okay... wow..."

"Wow?"

"Yeah... a hot, experienced woman like you? I bet thousands of guys drool over the pictures in your profile gallery, and I'm the one you considered? I'm flattered."

"Charmer. But yes, I've had several subs with whom sex isn't a part of what we do, so what I had in mind when I finally found a good match this time was... to include it. Not gonna happen now, obviously."

"No, obviously..."

"So if we were to start sessions, they wouldn't be sexual. Are you okay with that?"

"Well, I have to be. Otherwise this won't work, isn't that right?"

"Mhm."

I started feeling the butterflies in my stomach flying around as I remembered something she mentioned during our first meeting.

"What about the ... other thing... that you talked about? Forcing..."

"The forced orgasms? Yeah, I am looking for someone who will let me do that to them. It wouldn't be downright sexual, though... I guess... No, that's not right - it sort of would be, but the ... contact isn't... There are different ways of doing it, I may have some ideas... There may be toys involved. Do you feel comfortable with that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Good, that makes things easier."

She looked thoughtful, staring into the air as if she was already making detailed plans in her head. She started mumbling to herself.

"I might need to use my hands... Okay, so no oral, no genitals touching each other... but the hands... Hmm... That means I'd be touching ... How could ... gloves! My latex gloves, they're quite thick and ... well, it would be like ... it wouldn't be like I was actually touching... but yes, I might need to touch you ... in ... places. With my hands. Are you comfortable with that? That I'd be using my gloved hands on your naked body? Including your genitals? Doing things to you?"

"Yes." I said, looking her right in the eyes.

"You sound very sure."

"I am. I trust you. And besides ..."

"Yes?"

"Rule number one is already taking care of that for me, I think. If I don't see you as my mother, it shouldn't be a problem that you're touching me. Because it wouldn't be my mother touching me, it would be ... Mistress Anne."

"That's true, I guess... All right... we'll see how that goes ... If either one of us feels uncomfortable with it, we can always stop. And that brings me to rule number three."

She took a deep breath and had a drink from her glass before moving on.

"As you know by now... BDSM is all about consent. The things I do to you... they are things that you allow me to do."

"Yes."

"That means that you can use your safe word to stop when you need a break, when you're just feeling a bit uncomfortable... Don't push yourself too hard in the early stages. Saying stop like that, it's not merely an emergency brake, it's ... We go into our roles when we play. We play the parts. When we need to speak out-of-play for a second, that's when we use the safe word - it's like using a 'pause' button on a remote, taking us out of play for a bit so we can fix whatever's wrong ... even if it's just a small thing like... you're getting a leg cramp or... need the toilet or some such. Some subs are reluctant to use the stop word, thinking they're ruining things, but I think it's really the best option. After all, we can keep going mere seconds later, when you say go again."