Mr Computer Cleaner Ch. 07

"Good boy Cal. That's it, exactly. You've just got to believe in yourself, visualize your goal and you will achieve it."

Cal looked at him gratefully.

"Thanks Dio. That should be a great help. You know, when we first met we gave you a shit of a time. I'm ashamed about that. I know Carmen feels the same way but that so-called Spanish pride in her blood will not allow her to say she's sorry. But she's trying to make it up, that's why she's gone overboard trying to deliver a perfect wedding. It's going great having you as a son in law, mate."

Dio swung back to look out of the window, feeling an emotional welling coming on. "Thanks Cal. That was quite a speech. Very much appreciated; I better order you a real beer."

"No thanks mate. I've had a beer. Let's have the whisky and go. I suggest we walk through the shopping area and check out butts and legs."

"Do what?"

"Look for the best pair of legs and the best butt."

"You're serious, aren't you?"

"Yeah, we're on holiday."

"So we are. Right – one whisky and on to judging. It should pass the time rather quickly."

Cal looked positively cheerful. "I'll call Floppy Tits over for you to order our double whiskies."

"Cal, you become a delinquent when you get away from Carmen, don't you?"

"Wouldn't know what you're on about mate. But you watch tomorrow when I dish it out to her mama, Ogre of Las Pampas. She's the only woman alive who Carmen fears."

To Dio's surprise, Cal displayed exceptional talent at picking out best ass and best legged women. He could pick likely candidates when they were in the far distance, or were just coming out of shops side-on. Dio wasn't aware that it was a useful talent but it was an impressive skill, nonetheless. He had to wait until his likely candidates were almost upon him before he could reach his decision fairly.

Attempting to address his shortcomings, Dio declared Cal the winner and suggested they should switch to picking out the best busts.

"Nah, not really interested in tits," Cal said. "Here's a bookshop. Let's go in and look for adult comics."

As they walked into the shop Dio was surprised about Cal's lack of interest in feminine superstructure. Then it hit him: Carmen has only a modest bust but on the other hand really had lovely legs and a gorgeous...he stopped. Jeeze man! he chided, she's your mother-in-law; you shouldn't be thinking about the look of her ass!

When the men returned to the hotel they found both women in Carmen's bedroom, the room looking as if they were setting up a retail store.

"We've had a truly magnificent time," Carmen said.

"Hullo darling – we've excellend ourselves," Carra greeted Dio, happily.

Carmen stared at her disinterested husband who was standing reading one of his comics. She turned to Dio and said softly, "Well done. I knew I could trust you."

Carra had strained to hear that and found it difficult to accept: her mother admitting that a man was trustworthy? Mamma mia!

They went to late dinner at a cabaret restaurant. After dinner and another first floor show, Carmen grabbed Dio and led him to the floor, saying over her shoulder to her surprised daughter, "I'm just borrowing him for one dance."

Carra wave acknowledgement and grinned. She knew that Dio was in for a big surprise and that he would be terrified. She turned to talk to her father but he was engrossed, watching a gorgeous young woman at the edge of the dance floor adjusting her stockings. There was do doubt that they were stockings – her suspender belt was exposed.

Carra was about to chastise her father but then realized that he was not the only person surrounding them who was watching the little unscheduled floor show. The envious look on some of the women seeing at that beautifully shaped leg was something to behold.

"I – I can't really dance," stammered Dio.

"I know."

"What is it?"

"A quickstep rhythm but we can improvise if you wish."

"Can't do a quickstep," Dio said, frowning, and looking back to their table for help.

"Can you do a foxtrot?"

Dio looked down at Carmen and her dark eyes were sparkling, caught by the lighting of the diamond cut orb spinning above them.

"Yes."

"Well then, just think of doing a foxtrot fast. That will do and beside within a couple of minutes the floor will be packed and we'll be rockin' as if we're doing simulated sex."

"What!"

"Calm down – it's just a dancer's joke."

They moved off and Carmen came into him and kept right on coming until it was as if she was glued to him. He flushed, thinking that she'd be able to feel not only his shirt buttons and belt but also his gear that fortunately was in neutral.

Actually they appeared to be dancing quite gracefully. Everything Dio did she followed perfectly. Not once did he manage to step on her toes, nor did she mention they were not dancing to the rhythm of the music.

She flung her head back and laughed unnecessarily heartily at a couple of things Dio said, making him feel even more confident. He decided to spin around a couple of times quickly. He did it and found himself going around twice more as Carmen took control. Then during another twirl she slipped out of his grasp until they were linked only by their left arms and she came back into his embrace ever so smoothly. He realized then that she did have reasonably substantial breasts because he could feel them against his chest.

God, wasn't dancing sexy!

"You're good, a little better than I expected," she said kindly, as they walked back to the table.

Dio walked taller.

When the band resumed they all danced, and Carra said to Dio, "She's made you a better dancer already. She's amazing, isn't she?"

Dio agreed.

The band picked up tempo for the next dance and as he and Carra returned to the table her parents stayed on the floor.

"Watch them," Carra said proudly.

Dio couldn't believe his eyes. Big almost awkward walking Cal appeared to become a big rubber man with unbelievable flexibility. Other dancers watching them seemed to shy away a little, leaving more room for Cal and Carmen.

The drummer noticed what was going on and increased the tempo even further. A couple of minutes later all the other dancers were on the perimeter of the floor, watching. The couple dancing really got into their work and displayed amazing fluidity and variety.

"This is what mama was born to do," whispered Carra. "I'm really an excellent dancer but not a patch on her."

Dio decided that he would urgently ask Carmen to prepare him for the wedding dance – he would insist it be a foxtrot. They had three days to do it and he hoped she'd have time to help him. He knew he should have thought of it earlier.

They returned to the hotel all agreeing it had been a wonderful night. Carmen hugged and kissed Dio on the lips – that was a first! Cal gave him a soft one-armed hug and they shook hands. For the first time Dio became aware that he was part of the family.

Next morning Dio expected everyone to be happy, at least until they got to the airport. But he was wrong. All three were scratchy, but Carmen was the worst. She was frowning, her face looked lined and she was snapping away like a terrier.

They'd decided to go to the airport by cab and travel back in the chartered bus with the wedding party from Argentina.

"Hurry, hurry please," Carmen said to the driver.

"What terminal?"

"We don't know – oh, international."

"Thank you, lady. What airline?"

"Aeorlineas Argentinas?"

"Oh, no worries. That's Airline Manaña Manaña. It will be late."

Carmen bristled.

"Oh mama – look a dress shop," Carra lied; they were driving through an industrial area.

"Where?"

"No matter," said Carra, satisfied that an explosive situation had been defused.

They arrived at the terminal to find that the flight had already arrived.

Carmen lost it, and began speaking rapidly in Spanish.

"I guess some of those words are not ladylike?" Dio said to Carra and was told tersely to mind his own business. "She feels she has disgraced her mother."

Dio swung around to Cal.

"Remember, Cal. It is just you and the Ogre of Las Pampas. Everything – not even Carmen – is of any consequence. You are out to protect you manhood. The Ogre of Las Pampas."

They half-ran to where arriving passengers were emerging from Customs Control.

"I forgot to ask," Dio said to Carra. "Is her English good? After all, her father was English."

"Near to perfect, marked down by a slight accent. She was educated in Bath, England, London and Madrid so is fluent in all three languages plus Italian and gets along fine in German."

Cal had heard that and looked slightly unnerved.

"An educated ogre is still an ogre, Cal," Dio whispered, and Cal nodded.

They arrived at the crowded area just in time, perhaps only seconds to spare.

"There she is," Carmen trilled in great excitement, looking her normal self again.

"Mama, mama!"

Dio watched the faintly smiling woman, dressed in black and silver with jewelry galore, walking – no striding – towards them, carrying a square make-up bag. She didn't look the slightest bit fatigued.

The two women hugged and kissed each other.

Then Carmen drew Cal forward. He bowed rather stiffly and Dolores inclined her head slightly; they did not touch.

Then Carra rushed her, and mama put her handbag on to the ground to take her beloved granddaughter into her arms. She rained kisses on Carra as any ordinary long-separated grandmother would be expected to do. They chatted, and Dio watched a long double file of people behind mama waiting patiently. They were obviously the wedding entourage.

Carmen stood impassively watching her daughter being greeted at length; no telling what was going on in her mind. Cal stood looking reasonably relaxed, lips moving slightly. Dio hoped he was reciting 'Ogre of Las Pampas'.

Carra finally stepped back and Carmen moved into her place, holding out her hand.

"Dio."

Dio went up to them and Carmen took his left hand.

"Mama, it gives me great pleasure to introduce you to Carra's betrothed – Dio Wellington. Dio, please meet Dolores Rodriguez y Mendez de Leighton."

"Stand aside, girl, and let me look at him."

"Welcome to our part of the world, ma'am."

"Aha, a young man with manners; that presents a good impression."

"Do you really love my granddaughter?"

"I truly do."

"Do you ride?"

"Yes ma'am," Dio lied.

"Well then Dio, call me Dolores. We're not at home now. Here, take my arm."

As they began to move off she called, "Cal, fetch my make-up bag."

"Get one of your servants to do it," Cal smiled walking off.

"Cal, did you not hear me," Dolores called.

"I heard you, crystal clear, Dolores," he said, over his shoulder.

Dio felt the body against his arm stiffen and a huge gasp came from Carmen. Carmen dived for the bag.

"Leave it, Carmen. Cal is right. Maria will fetch it as she passes." They walked out to the bus.

As Dolores' party of four married couples were being introduced, the eight 'servants' including the physician moved on to the bus and went to the rear. The physician was sitting forward of the others one seat between them, Dio noticed. He thought 'protocol'.

Nothing about Dolores appeared scary, at least to him. However, if you relied on her paying your wages no doubt the smart thing to do would to act with due deference. Her features were too sharp to be beautiful, but she was attractive – a standout really, for her age. Her hair was long and heavily streaked with white and she was lean, just like her daughter and seemed imbued with the same sort of physical power. He was aware of this by the way she stood, and especially when she walked. Just like Carmen she was perfumed and wore black clothing and wore it elegantly. The one thing that he really noted was her mouth – her lips were thin and when her mouth was tightly closed it looked suggestively cruel and perhaps would really look so if her almost black eyes hardened. So far she'd been all smiles.

Did he like her? If it hadn't been for the aura that the family placed around Dolores, Dio would have immediately answered yes. He speculated if mama were deceased Carmen would be just like her, afraid of no-one, so would he like her any less if she toughened up - of course not. So did he like Dolores – YES!

Although Dolores was not president of Argentina, she'd taken the presidential suite for herself. It was an enormous area and Dio licked his lips when he looked at the huge four-posted bed.

"Oh, there you are, Dio," Dolores said, coming up behind him and now carrying her square carry bag. "On the night of the wedding the family will come back to another hotel and stay with me. Carra and you will have this suite for two nights as part of my wedding gift. Now, come in and shut the door. I wish to speak to you."

The Ogre of Las Pampas, the Ogre of Las Pampas, and Dio said to himself. He felt as if he was back at school and being summonsed to the headmaster's office.

Dolores sat at the dressing table and began removing items from her hair including a black netting thing.

"Don't look away. I'm not going to disrobe completely and anyway, even if I did you would not expect me to look revolting, would you?"

"No Dolores. Indeed you look exceptionally fit, especially for someone ...er..."

"Of my age?"

"Yes."

"Well, at least you are frank, not evasive like my daughter. I ride at least one of my horses almost every day. You being a rider will know what that means in respect of fitness."

"Carmen is not evasive."

"How charmingly loyal of you, Dio. I know a lot about you, as Carmen writes to me weekly. She says you are quite influential with people. It was you, wasn't it?"

"Me? What do you mean?"

"It was you who's schooled Cal to be St George and stand up to me."

Dio looked at her in the mirror and tried to stare her down. She was good! She didn't say anything so he felt obliged to say yes.

"I knew it. There was nobody else and the poor man could not have done it by himself. You have achieved quite an amazing thing."

The opportunity was there, so Dio snatched it. "Please will you respect of him now. You are aware that your daughter is only a plane trip away from you, admittedly a very long plane trip. Carmen also talks about you often. She's scared of you also, but I have not interfered because she does not cry inside to be helped as I sensed Cal was." He held his breath; would she remain in sweet-talking mode?

"You have explained yourself very well, Dio. I have no intention of changing anything with Carmen. She is strong; I like her just how she is. Cal, I already like him a lot better. Come and undo my necklace, and don't dare refuse. You have nothing to prove."

"Yes ma'am."

"You're a good boy, Dio. You will be fine for my granddaughter. Now run along, I must rest. It is quite exhausting attempting to hide every sign of the exhaustion one feels."

"Hasta la vista!" he grinned.

"An appalling accent, but appreciated, Dio. Maria is waiting outside. Please ask her to come in as you leave."

The Fleming party returned to their hotel, Dio sitting in the front of the cab. Carra was in the back apparently dozing while Carmen was all over Cal.

"You were so wonderful, darling, strong and defiant yet not quite rude."

Thrusting her hand under his shirt, she added: "I saw the look in her eyes. She now respects you. How did you do it?"

"Dio."

"Dio?" chorused the women, with Carra now very much awake.

Back in their room, Carra and Dio were drinking coffee; she was stretched out in his arms dressed in only her panties. Dio wore only in his socks.

"Well, that was a memorable meeting at the airport. How did you motivate daddy?"

"I had a few words."

"When?"

"While you two were squandering fortunes in shops."

"Really? Mama thought you two would be downing beers and ogling the ladies."

"There are no ladies in bars – never."

"Oh, what a sweet thing to say; I never go to bars, do I?"

"Not overly frequently."

"Oh!"

"Cal's going to have a great night tonight," smiled Dio.

"What do you mean? They've gone to bed."

"Exactly. Do you see her in the cab? She was practically having it off then and there."

"Dio Wellington! Don't be so foul. My parents don't go at it like we do!"

"Don't they?" said Dio, grinning and allowing his right hand to wander.

"If you dare touch me I shall scream."

"Scream away, babe. Here comes Hungry Joe!"

They lay on the leather sofa, rather weary.

"This is our second to last night together before the wedding – go slowly to make it last."

"What? Why? Who said?"

"Mama, she says it is improper for the bride not to be in the home of her parents on the eve of her wedding, and that the husband-to-be should not see the bride until she arrives for the wedding ceremony."

"What! That's a night without sex!"

"Quite. Hence my comment about go slowly tonight to make it last."

"B-b-but how will I last? We've got rather used to being together."

"Oh, you shall survive. Perhaps I could email you some dirty pictures?"

"That's not the same – you are warm, cuddly, say nice things to me and you blow on my nipples. There is no substitute for you."

"Oh my. You do say the nicest things to a girl. Perhaps I really didn't mean what I said about going slowly..."

Again they lay on the leather sofa, rather weary.

"That was nice."

"Just the best," Dio sighed. "There's something I must ask you now that you are so soft, innocent and vulnerable lying in my arms. Why do plans for our honeymoon have to be a secret?"

"Because it's mama's wish."

"But she must have given you a hint when she asked you for our passports?"

"No, I've never known mama to hold out on me like this. She'd not even told daddy because she knows I would wheedle it out of him."

"Bloody hell. It could be a place that we find is a total bore. I was willing to pay through the nose to take you somewhere great, but she had to get in first."

"That's my caring, sweet generous mother you are talking about."

"Sorry."

"That's all right. Stop! That was not an invitation; we must go slowly," she said.

"Looking forward to the greatest day of you life?"

"I'm going to love it, but it will not be remembered as the greatest day of my life."

"Oh, when was that?"

"When you phoned me after you found my email when we'd first met; I was fearful that we would see each other again."

"You've never told me that."

"I'm telling you now. Have all the arrangements been made on your side?"

"Yes. It's my boys' night out on Friday night and you will be at your hen's party."

"Silly, I know that, and I know that the men have to get their suits early on Saturday, my girls are all fitted out but we have our appointment to be at the hairdressers' at 9:00 sharp on my wedding day."

"Our wedding day."

"Quite, sorry. You must also remember that I require you to be on your best behavior all day tomorrow."

"Aren't I always?"

"Yes, but mama's got me so nervous about grandmama's visit and dinner that I am extremely nervous. I just had to say that to underpin my own confidence, I guess."

"Oh darling, your mama and grandmana do scare you a little, don't they?"

"Yes, just a little. Never mind, this is a convenient time to bring me up to date with our business."

"All operational as we speak. During the three weeks we'll be away, wherever we're going, Philip will be acting general manager and Selby will be acting operations manager. No franchise applications are in the pipeline and your administration is right up to date, so no worries."

"Then those two franchise sales for those guys up country; are they operational?"

"Yep, the lads from The Triangle picked up their vans from Selby two mornings ago."

"We're riding a wave, aren't we darling?"