My Cousin, My Escort

It was a knock at his door.

=====

"What the fuck am I doing? What the fuck am I doing?"

Cassie must have asked herself that question ten times as she walked back to her cousin's hotel room. She didn't have her luggage this time and any and all of the confidence she walked in with the first time was long gone.

She really should have left. She can feel the weight of that decision now more clearly than ever before. But something kept stopping her. She had to fix this. It was too risky not to.

She didn't know exactly what to expect but she had hoped her cousin would answer and they could talk about this like adults. Yes, it was going to be awkward but she had spent too long building this life to let it be ruined by a 20-second misunderstanding.

She knocked again.

=====

Tony froze the moment he heard the sound at the door. In the back of his mind, he knew who it was but he held out hope that maybe it was housekeeping coming to clean the room.

"At eight o'clock at night?" he asked himself silently. "Are you stupid?"

Nope. He knew Cassie was on the other side of that door and, if he opened it, things were about to get weird. She knocked again.

"Come on, open up," she said.

Tony opened the door a crack, looked outside and saw his cousin standing on the other side of it. Just as he feared. She looked flustered but that didn't change the fact that she was quite literally the last person in the world he wanted to talk to right now.

"Can I come in?" she asked.

"I guess," he replied.

"Look," she said. "I don't want to have this talk any more than you do. Trust me."

Tony let her in against his better judgement and hoped whatever she had to say would be quick and to the point so he could get out of here and forget this whole thing had ever happened.

He walked over the fridge and grabbed a bottle of the Gatorade he had bought earlier that afternoon, back when he was looking forward to being in a hotel room with the knockout he saw in the ad. Before he knew who that body belonged to.

"Okay," she said. "I know this is weird. I know. I'm sorry for leaving like that but, I ... I really don't know what to say."

"Yeah," he replied. "Me either."

"So we've got to talk to about this. Obviously."

"Yep," he said, dejected.

"I wasn't expecting to see you here," she said. "And I know you didn't expect me."

"That's an understatement."

"But here we are," Cassie said, thinking hard about what she was going to say next. "We're adults. And we're family. And I don't think this needs to be a big deal. You found out what I do to make money. I found out you cheat on your wife with escorts."

"Hey, fuck you," Tony responded, pissed off for the first time. "Don't try to blame me for this shit and act like I did something wrong here."

"And I did?" Cassie said.

"Well, you're the one selling pussy."

"You know what, fuck you too asshole," Cassie said, fuming. She considered leaving yet again.

The two of them let the silence hang in the air. They'd both crossed a line and this conversation wasn't going where either of them wanted it to.

Cassie and Tony both needed to leave this room without making the other person an enemy. If word of this got out, it would be bad for both of them, especially if it got around to other family members. Cassie had no desire to explain her career choices to her mother or sisters and Tony had even less desire to try to talk to anyone about his sex life with his wife.

Yet there's exactly where he took the conversation next.

"I'm not cheating on anyone." he said.

"Oh bullshit," Cassie said. "You think I don't remember our emails? Is this the point where you convince me you were hiring me to tell me how wrong being an escort is?"

"I never said that," he replied. "All I'm saying is I'm not cheating on anyone. Kayla knows I'm here."

"She WHAT?!?!?!" Cassie said, shocked.

"She knows I'm here," Tony said.

"I don't buy it,"

"No, seriously. She does," Tony said. "We have an arrangement. It's not like a, I mean I guess it kind of is but it's not ... anyway, I've never done this before but I'm not cheating. I've always wanted to hire an escort and she ... well, she kind of said I could."

"YOU TOLD YOUR WIFE ABOUT ME?" Cassie was practically screaming at this point.

"Obviously not, dipshit," Tony replied, growing more annoyed with every word. "I didn't know it was going to be YOU who showed up. I hired an escort three towns over from my house, away from where I know ANYONE and YOU showed up? What are you even doing here? Does your mom know what you're doing?"

"It's none of her business and it's none of your business," Cassie said.

"Like hell it's not," Tony replied. "It might not have been my business ten minutes ago but it damn well is now."

"No, it's not," Cassie said, matter of factly. "And, frankly, I'm only back here to tell you to mind your fucking business and keep this to yourself."

"Or what?" he said.

"Or I'll kick your ass," Cassie said. She didn't want to but the comment broke her mood and she laughed. She knew there was no chance she could physically intimidate her cousin. He easily had 120 pounds on her and she's not exactly the ass-kicking type.

"Honestly, I'd like to see you try," Tony said, happy for the little hint of a lighthearted break from the tone they've had thus far. "I've already paid you so I guess I may as well get something for my money."

"I mean, obviously I'm going to give you your money back," Cassie said. "I'm not a bitch."

"Yeah, I know," he replied.

Another awkward moment of silence. Tony stared at his phone, unsure of what he was looking for but knowing it beat the hell out of looking his cousin in the eye right now.

"So what now?" he said, breaking the quiet.

"What do you mean?" she said.

"Well, this isn't how I envisioned tonight going," Tony said. "And, honestly, I think I want to cut my losses and get out of here."

"Okay," Cassie said. "That's fine with me."

"Cool,"

"You're not going to tell anyone about this, right?" she asked.

"Tell them what exactly?" Tony wondered. "That I spent ten years working up the courage to hire an escort and the first time I do, I get my freaking cousin?"

Cassie didn't see it coming but that line broke her. She couldn't help herself. She started to laugh uncontrollably, right in Tony's face. Her laughter, coupled with the ridiculousness of the situation he found himself in, made him break too.

"Yeah, that sucks, dude," Cassie eked out. "That's ... well, that's .... that's something."

It took Cassie a few moments to recompose herself but she felt a lot better about things and was relieved at how this conversation had turned out compared to how it started. As awkward as running into a family member was in this situation, at least with Tony she knew she could joke about it. They weren't really "close" as cousins but they had a decent enough relationship that they could find the silliness in this.

"I, uhh, I just need to know you're not going to tell anyone about this, okay?" she asked. "It's really important."

"How long have you been doing this?" Tony asked.

"Why?"

"I just ... I have to know," he said. "How have you kept this secret?"

"Luck, I guess," she said. "I never thought I'd run into something like this. I've been so careful. I guess I fucked up. I should have made you send me your ID or a reference or something. If I knew it was you, I would have never shown up."

"Thanks," Tony replied. "That does wonders for my confidence."

"Come on," Cassie said. "You know what I mean."

"Nah, I get it," Tony said. "Your secret is safe with me. As long as you don't tell anyone it was me you ran into."

"Ahh damn," she replied. "I was just getting ready to tweet about this and tag you. Can you imagine how many likes I'd get if I let everyone know I almost got paid to fuck my cousin?"

"I mean, technically you did get paid," Tony said, laughing.

"You know what I mean, jerk," she said.

"Yeah, yeah, fine," Tony said. "We both take this secret to our graves."

"Good," Cassie said, breathing a sigh of relief.

=====

Cassie and Tony spent the next 20 minutes unsure of what to do next. On the one hand, they both wanted so badly to leave this room. On the other, they didn't want to be the one to make the first move to exit.

So they did what any pair of cousins would do. They talked. A lot.

For 20 minutes, they each tried to make things as easygoing as possible and, if you happened to walk in on them, you'd think they were just catching up and casually hanging out.

Tony told Cassie all about his work and the projects he's been doing around the house. Cassie told Tony all about her friends and the random Zumba class she started taking once a week.

It's hard to describe how relaxed this all felt, Tony thought. It's almost like this misunderstanding was a good thing and might even bring them closer together.

"So I have a question," Cassie said. Tony knew immediately based on tone alone that those comfortable feelings were about to go out the window.

"Shoot," he said.

"Why am I here?" she asked.

"Come on now," he said. "You know why."

"No, no," she said. "I'm not asking why am I here in the literal sense of why did you call me. I'm asking why you hired an escort. Sorry. Attempted to hire an escort."

"You wouldn't understand," he said.

"Try me," she replied.

Tony spent a good 30 seconds trying to figure out how to phrase his next statement but it still came out more awkward than he intended. Talking sex with any family member, let alone one you just found out is a sexual professional, is not easy.

"I wanted to try it," he said. "It's a fantasy of mine. Has been for years."

"Okay but why an escort?" Cassie said. "You said Kayla is okay with it, which I still can't believe. Why not just jump on Tinder or something and find someone else to get your rocks off with?"

"The sex isn't really the point," he said. "I can't really explain it and I definitely don't want to explain it to you. This is really fucking weird."

"Listen, I don't know what you think I do when I'm working with clients but half my job is listening," she said. "Try me."

"I like the fantasy," he said. "I love Kayla. You know that. There's no one I'd rather spend my life with but sometimes ... sometimes I just have needs she can't fill."

"Ahh," Cassie said, nodding.

"She's amazing but she's my wife," he explained. "And when you marry someone and you're with them for years, the sex just ... "

He really didn't want to say this part.

"The sex just isn't as exciting as it used to be," he finished.

Cassie let that statement hang in the air for a moment.

"It's not that we don't have sex," he said. "We still do. But it's not very often and, when it does happen, it doesn't have that same feeling that it used to."

"Okay," she said, letting him finish.

"I just wanted to feel that again," he said. "That feeling of doing something new. God, I sound like a douche. I figured I'd hire someone for that. A professional. Plus, it's always been a fantasy of mine to meet someone new, give them money, fuck like an animal and say goodbye to them. No strings attached."

"Ahh," she said. "Now I get it. But why me? You definitely saw my photos. You mean you didn't know?"

"Didn't know you were fucking hot?" Tony said, immediately regretting his phrasing. "Sorry. That's weird."

"Yeah it is."

A few moments passed.

"So why are you here? Why are you an escort?" Tony asked.

"I already told you that's none of your business," she said, chuckling as she spoke so she didn't make things tense again.

"Come on," he pleaded. "You asked me a question. I'm asking you one. I thought we were having a heart to heart. What are you doing here?"

"What do you mean?" Cassie asked.

"I mean," Tony said, preparing to emphasize every word. "What. Are. YOU. doing HERE."

"Do you really need to ask that?" Cassie sighed. "Fine. I'll bite. But only because you were nice and answered my question first. After I leave this room we're never talking about this again."

"Deal," Tony said.

"I'm here because I'm an escort," she said. "And I'm an escort because I like being an escort."

"Seriously?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said. "I've been doing it for like three years. It's crazy good money, it's a lot of fun and most times I'm not running into people I know."

That line got a laugh out of Tony. Cassie decided to let her guard down a little bit.

"Okay so, like, this isn't anyone's business but my own but I really like doing this," she said. "I like getting paid to make people happy and I like having a job I know helps me help people."

"You sound like a social worker," Tony joked.

"Fuck you," Cassie said, laughing. "Yeah. Make fun of the escort. How original. I'm not trying to be Julia Roberts or whatever. I'm not ridiculous. I know what this is and why I'm doing it. I get paid to have sex for a living and it might not be 'normal' or whatever but I help people."

"Uh huh," Tony said.

"Seriously," she said. "I have clients I've seen for YEARS who treat me incredibly well and tell me every time I see them that I'm the only thing they look forward to."

As Cassie spoke, Tony couldn't help but notice she really sounded convincing. She was either an incredible actress or she really did believe these things about sex work.

"It's not just about the sex," she said. "It's about making a connection. It's about being able to be vulnerable with someone. It's about having fun."

"By fucking," Tony said.

"Well, yeah," Cassie replied.

"If you love your job so much, why do you charge for it?" Tony asked, genuinely interested in where Cassie would take the next answer.

"I'm REALLY good at my job," she said. "Why shouldn't I get paid?"

Cassie and Tony looked at each other and both laughed. What a perfect way to end an odd evening.

"Anyway, I've uh, I've got to get going," Cassie said, texting her friend Jenny that she was headed home.

"Alright," Tony said. "I guess I should get out of here too."

"Look, I'm sorry," Cassie said. "I know this didn't turn out the way you planned."

"It's fine," he said. "It kind of is what it is."

"So I can keep the money then?" Cassie said, with a smile on her face.

"Nope," Tony said. "I'm gonna need that cash back so I can buy as much alcohol as it takes to forget all about this."

"Fair enough," Cassie said. "I'll Paypal you when I get home."

"Cool," Tony said, making his way back over to the bed to watch some TV while he waited for the coast to clear and make his way out of the hotel. "I guess I'll see ya later."

"Yeah," Cassie said, grabbing the door. "I guess so."

=====

Cassie walked out of Tony's hotel for the second time and, somehow, felt worse than before.

Even though the conversation went great, and she wasn't mad anymore, she couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. She was sad for him. What a shitty way to ruin a clients' fantasy.

"He's not a client, idiot," she scolded herself. "He's your fucking cousin!"

But what was she supposed to do? She wasn't going to sleep with him and the few escort friends she had, all had their own booking processes. There's no way she could call one of them to fuck her cousin -- what a strange statement by the way-- and she definitely couldn't do so without raising red flags and making them think she was trying to set them up.

And, even if she wasn't, who tries to get their FAMILY MEMBERS laid?

Cassie got back to her car and looked inside to make sure her luggage was still where she left it, a habit she picked up from living in shitty neighborhoods most of her life and never quite trusting those around her. It was. She felt relieved.

"I'm in my car," she texted Jenny.

"How was it?" Jenny asked.

"It was a dud," Cassie said. "Nothing special."

"Bummer," Jenny said. "Let me know when you get home. And if you want to hang out this weekend, I'm free Saturday."

With that, Cassie ended the conversation and got ready to drive home. For the second time in the last 40 minutes, she had her key in the ignition. She started her car, carefully backed out of her spot and made her way to the exit. As she waited for the car in front of her to turn left out of the parking lot, she looked down on her phone one last time.

Then she had a thought that changed everything.

=====

The third knock nearly startled Tony out of his shoes. Literally.

As he stood close to the hotel room door getting ready to head out, the sound jolted him out of the mental prison he'd locked himself into since Cassie left the room minutes earlier.

"Shit," he thought. "What now?"

Resigned, he opened the door to see his cousin standing there with her luggage in tow again.

"Okay, so this is weird but hear me out," Cassie said, barging right back into the room without waiting for an invitation.

"Sure, come on in," Tony joked sarcastically. "Make yourself at home. It's not like I was about to leave or anything."

"Don't make this more awkward than it needs to be," Cassie said.

"Make what awkward?" he asked.

"This." Cassie said.

With that, Cassie dragged her suitcase up onto the hotel bed.

"I don't feel right leaving the way I did and I don't think you do either," she said.

"Umm..." Tony stuttered, unsure where this was going.

Cassie pulled her phone from her pocket, typed in her password and opened up the email that set all of tonight's events in motion.

"Hey Alyssa," she read. "I saw your ad online and wanted to reach out to book an appointment with you."

Tony didn't need to listen. He knew what the words in that email said before they were spoken.

"Stop," he pleaded.

"Just listen for a minute," she replied, returning to the email. "I'm looking for someone to fulfill a specific fantasy of mine and I think your the girl-- by the way, you used the wrong form of that word here."

"Are you really trying to teach me grammar right now?"

"I'm just saying." Cassie continued. "I think 'your' the girl. I like your attitude and love the way you look in your photos. You're so sexy."

Tony couldn't help but blush from embarrassment knowing he called his cousin sexy. Whether that was his intent or not didn't matter. He said it and he said it based on the photos she posted. Family member or not, he liked her body and admitted it.

"My fantasy is super simple," she continued. "I want to hire you to come to my hotel room, get dressed super sexy in all black, strip for me, give me a lap dance and see what happens from there."

Tony was mortified.

Thank God he didn't get into specifics of the sex acts he really wanted. They weren't weird or anything but hearing his cousin talk about how he wanted her to blow him and let him fuck her for an hour would have been too much to take.

"I'm STD clear, super discreet, yada yada yada," Cassie read, trailing off before she could finish the email. "You know the rest."

"Yeah, I do," he said.

"Okay," she replied.

"Okay what?" Tony asked.

"Well, let's talk about it for a second," she said.

"Can we really not?" Tony pleaded, already beyond embarrassed and just looking for a way to get out of this room without crawling out of his skin.

"No, no," she said. "I just want to talk."

"About what?"

"A striptease? A lap dance?" she asked.

"Yeah?" Tony asked, still unsure what she was getting at.

"I mean ..." Cassie paused. Was she really about to say what she came into this room to say? "I can do that."

=====

The words hung in the air like moisture on a humid day.

"What?" Tony asked.

Cassie didn't know what to say next and almost immediately regretted those last four words when they slipped from her mouth. But there was no turning back now. She said what she said. The only thing left to do was to see where things went next.