My Journal, A Visit from Chad

I was a little surprised and self conscious when Chad came over yesterday. I had been dancing for about an hour when I heard the knock on my door. I wasn't sure what to do. No one has knocked on my door since the quarantine began and no one other than me has been in my apartment for what seems like forever now. I have to admit that I was a bit panicked and confused. I haven't worn clothes inside of my apartment for days, and I didn't know if I should get dressed or not, or if I should be crawling to the door on my hands and knees or what the person at the door would think if I answered the door naked.

I was nervous to the point that I was shaking when I answered the door. I was still completely nude when I answered it. To my relief it was just Chad, one of the guys from my class. When I opened the door he just looked me over and said, "Wow"! with a big smile on his face. I was extremely embarrassed but at the same time his pleased look really felt good. I think it was a very sincere form of a compliment that he seemed to like seeing me nude and I was also feeling good to have some company over after so long being in quarantine.

I invited Chad to come inside my apartment pretty quickly. I wasn't sure what my neighbors would think if they saw me standing nude in my doorway. I closed the door after Chad walked in and asked him if it would freak him out if I got on my hands and knees and explained that I was supposed to stay on all fours while in my apartment unless I was dancing or had company over. Technically Chad was company but he was also in my class so I didn't know if that counted as company. Chad just smiled and said nervously, "Oh, yes, absolutely, get on your hands and knees, the professor explained that to me."

I couldn't help wondering why Chad was at my apartment. I no idea he was going to drop by unannounced. Chad is a nice guy but somewhat awkward. He isn't like most of the people in my class. He isn't working on a Psychology degree like most of us. He is an engineering student who only took the Human Sexuality course as an elective. I got the impression that he has an easier time being isolated than I do since he was more of an introvert and as far as I knew, he didn't have a girlfriend. He wasn't an unattractive guy but he wasn't a jock either like the guys I normally date. He was a little overweight but not obese or anything like that and his hair was always just a little bit messy. Not disgusting never washes it messy, but more like never uses product and constantly needs to be combed messy.

Knowing that Chad had already talked to our professor about me and my rules I was relieved and dropped down to my hands and knees. Chad followed me as I crawled into the living room and asked him to make himself comfortable. Chad smiled a little nervously and sat down on my couch. I remained on my hands and knees between my coffee table and the couch, not quite sure how I should be sitting with company over.

Chad looked down at me and told me that he wished that he knew that I was like this while we were in class. I laughed and told him that to be honest, I didn't know that I was like this. I told him to not be fooled, that this was horribly embarrassing for me, but at the same time it was a strange kind of release for me. Chad just said that he understood, and that for him this was something a little embarrassing for him too. The Chad explained that our professor wanted for him to work on his confidence with girls and said that I would probably help with that if he came over to my apartment.

I was a little confused by that I told Chad I didn't understand what I could do. Chad explained that he needed help learning to be in charge more and developing more confidence so the professor told him that he should come by my apartment and learn to be in charge with me. I was a little surprised and I asked Chad to explain more. Chad went on to let me know that one of the rules that the professor had given him was that everything he did with me, I would have to consent to. He would have to ask me first before he did anything with me but that the professor had also given him specific tasks and things that he wanted to have Chad tell me to do. I guess it was a relief when Chad explained that I would have to consent to everything but it also sent a strange chill through my body when he told me that the professor wanted to see if he could train me.

I blushed deeply when Chad told me that he needed to learn how to train me. I was both excited and a little scared at the same time so I asked him to explain what that meant. He could tell that I was feeling nervous about what he had just said, and reassured me that my consent was required for everything. He wasn't allowed to make me do or do anything to me that I haven't expressly consented to. I asked, that means if I decide not to do something I don't have to do it? Chad looked a little flustered and told me, "Well, its a little more complicated than that." Once you consent to something it stays consented to, for instance, if you say that I can touch you, I can keep touching you until you withdraw your consent.

My mind started racing with questions as I started to feel a thousand different emotions swelling up inside me. I felt myself shivering a little. There I was, on my hands and knees, naked in front of a guy from my class. Nervously, I asked him, "Do you want to touch me?" I couldn't believe I just asked him that. Chad smiled and said, "Yes" I don't know why I said it. I felt so many things at that moment, not the least of which was a profound sense of shame and yet I responded, "You can touch me Chad."

Chad's smile was literally beaming down on me as he looked down at me. His hand reached down as I looked up at him. I wasn't sure what to expect right then, but I felt an odd sense of delight as I felt his hand gently stroke my hair. It was as if he was petting me. As I felt his hand continue to gently stroke my hair, my mind began to calm and regain some composure and I began to imagine myself changing. I realized something inside of me was starting to be transformed. Something that had already started to change inside of me even before Chad had dropped by. I felt like I was becoming a pet.

Just as this realization was hitting me I was suddenly filled with a sense of sadness when Chad told me that he couldn't stay. I have to admit I was a little amused as he thanked me with a funny kind of enthusiasm, like he was a little kid that just got told that he was going to go to a carnival. I was amused but I was actually pretty happy that I made him feel that way. I was sorry to see him leave, but he told me that he had an assignment to complete that was due soon.

I was sad as he left. I'm really hoping that he will come back. I really liked visiting with Chad.