All Comments on 'My Silence Will Cost You Ch. 05'

WOW. Self-realization can be so overpowering at times and right now I'm feeling both of these guys. I remember having the same guilt and shame that Kyle is feeling after only moments before being willing to do anything my partner wanted. I can also remember feeling Sean's guilt after having pushed someone to go farther than they were ready for at the time. Can't believe there's only 1 chapter left to wrap all this up, but I have faith you'll do a better job of it than I've done in the past. Once again, you've given us a chapter that goes far beyond *****s, thanks.

That's pretty intense, and my feelings go back and forth. At one point, Sean is so sneaky, getting consent but not really informed consent. Then Kyle seems to get into it, except Sean is toying with his sex drive and his pure lust. Now Kyle has blown up, not really unexpectedly. I'm not sure where this is going, but I'm really feeling sorry for Kyle. Yeah, he's a cheat and is being blackmailed because he is, but it's still hard to think what the blackmailer is doing is okay. So much to unpack here, but it's still a well written story! I'm looking forward to seeing where you take things in Chapter 6.

@MarcLuciFer Huge thanks, stud! That means so very much. It is that exact push/pull that I wanted to articulate in this story as I think that is a shared experience all sexual people have. Being caught up in the moment… going too far. Pushing someone too far. Than the reaction. I wanted to be true to these men and show that struggle many of us have survived. If this chapter was about the action and reaction what could possibly be next? 😉 thank you so much for your support!

@nygayguy Thank you my friend. We wanted this story to be a bit of a rollercoaster. I think looking back to our late teens and early 20’s we all experienced those lust filled times and then struggled. Our boys here are complicated and I hope there was enough for readers to be invested enough to see if they can find some kind of normal together or apart that will help these boys heal from this. As they are both extremely flawed. Thanks again for being willing to take this ride.

That ending was heartbreaking! My heart goes out to Kyle.

You keep doing this to us - getting them closer and then tearing them apart.

I really want them to be together, even though I hate Sean - no amount of self-righteous talk can deny the fact that he's a rapist - no one owes you sexual favours no matter what. Period.

That being said, I do want things to become right between these two and for them to outgrow both of their shitty behavior.

I'm hoping that after this explosive turn of events, they're able to do some soul-searching and have an open and honest conversation with each other.

Please don't stop at chapter 6. I want a happy ending for these two and I want to be able to witness a loving phase of theirs.

Kudos on writinf a truly riveting chapter!

Intense AF. Kyle is clearly distraught and broken by his enjoyment of and desire for gay sex. He wants it so much but can’t overcome the conditioning he’s had as a straight male. I hope with time that he can reconcile himself. And I hope his relationship with Sean is not irreparable. A lot was down and said by both so they have a steep hill to climb! Can’t wait for chapter 6.

So well written. A roller-coaster ride for both characters as well as me. One moment I'm cheering for Beanpole, the next is for Kyle. These are young adult roommates with flaws, and none of us should point fingers without admitting our own. Let's hope there's some form of reconciliation but I rather hope realism eventually wins and we don't have a schmaltzy ending that's not in keeping,but I will avidly awaiting the last chapter.

Very interesting continuation, good sex scenes, and I like how Kyle's internalized homophobia is showing from time to time to spice it up! I never really get it myself, the denial of my sexual orientation, so I have hard time to put myself in such person's shoes, but I like reading about it for sure. I just always liked twinks and never ever, even for a second, had a problem with admitting to myself I lean to the gay side more than to my straight side. So it's an interesting case with Kyle, even only psychologically.

5 stars from me, easy!

Once again the struggle continues and your writing keeps me up at night. Maybe I’m a bit more sympathetic for Kyle than Sean as I experienced more (some of both for sure) of what he has in the story. Sean certainly is a normal horny college guy and I am still impressed by his ground rules for the 609. It’s just that he keeps promising not push Kyle’s reasonable boundaries, especially at this point in his first experience of being pleasured and pleasuring another man sexually. Sean repeatedly breaking his promises and pushing so hard and fast. It’s only been 3 months and Sean even reminds himself of that. Sean is Calculating at times with premeditation in his actions to sexually gratify himself whereas Kyle is mostly getting a bit carried away in the heat of the moment. Then post nut clarity sets in and he not only has his own cognitive dissonance to deal with but also Sean’s betrayal. Sean’s saying he’s sorry as Kyle is crying angrily is sadly sounding hollow by now and I fear that it will destroy their trust for good. I had hoped that they would find a way to be a couple but I’m not sure if that amount of healing and change can happen in just one more chapter.

Let’s talk a minute about Kyle and ass play. It’s hard to believe that a straight man with no gay experience can take 4-5 fingers and thumbs in his virgin ass at once so easily and then slide an entire 9” inch huge cock into his ass with little effort. Has this guy had other gay experience before? And since it’s been referenced several times, what’s the deal with Kyle’s dad and his “teaching” him how to keep his asshole so clean at all times. And why? Who has ever heard of a dad teaching his son that? Was Kyle sexually molested by his dad growing up? Is that going to be part of his trauma and deep homophobia? God I hope not, but that recurring plot point confuses me.

Well. Sean is a rapist. I can understand wanting to get even for being treated shittily, but this is too far. Their relationship should be irredeemable, and one of them should move out. (I’m saying “should” because I don’t know if a HEA will be attempted.) With Kyle winning the game, I’m betting he gets to move to a better dorm.

I’m with the Anon who wondered if Kyle had been molested by his dad. If he was, then wrapping this up in six chapters doesn’t make sense. I can only assume the story will continue in order to wrap up the disparate plot points.

You write wonderfully, you show how closeness between Kyle and Sean can become, overcoming boundaries in yourself and with a friend. Unfortunately for Me, Sean crossed the line with Kyle and took advantage of Kyle's submission. Both massage and anal sex gave Kayle an erotic elation, but it was Kyle's pleasure that made him feel exploited. His escape is a defense against Kyle realizing he enjoys it, or perhaps it's a defense against returning to what he experienced in his younger years. Will this experience of meeting Sean trigger Kyle's rejection, trauma, homophobia? Or maybe I'll become even closer friends? Greetings from Poland, SissyBoy from Warsaw.

Wspaniale piszesz, ukazujesz jak może się stać bliskość pomiędzy Kyle'm a Seanem, pokonywanie granic w samym sobie jak i wobec przyjaciela. Niestety dla Mnie Sean przekroczył granicę wobec Kyle'a i wykorzystał jego uległość. Zarówno masaż jak i seks analny sprawił Kayle'owi erotyczne uniesienie, przyjemność to jednak Kyle'a poczuł się wykorzystany. Jego ucieczka jest obroną przed uzmysłowieniem sobie przez Kyle'a że sprawia mu to przyjemność, a może jest to obrona przed powrotem do tego co doświadczył w młodszych latach. Czy to doświadczenie ze spotkania z Sean'em wywoła u Kyle'a odrzucenie, traumę, homofobię? A może stanę się jeszcze bliższymi przyjaciółmi? Pozdrawiam z Polski, SissyBoy z Warszawy.

You are killing me with the wait! I've checked three times just this morning hoping for the next installment!

@SMCSheffrey - Chapter 6 - the FINAL Chapter will publish tonight at 2am Eastern Time in the US when the site updates. It is loaded, approved and scheduled to publish! I can't wait to hear from you guys as to how you think we did with this series over all.

@SissyBoy - you are so very sweet! I can't thank you enough for your support and thoughtful responses.

@geemeedee - thanks so much for leaving a comment. Yah, both of these guys are flawed and those flaws are drastically effecting the other and causing a great amount of pain. This story I fear is all too common in relationships and I wanted to see how we could tease out a complicated storyline and still care and want folks to want to see what's next. I sincerely hope you let me know what you think of chapter 6.

@anon Huge thanks for taking the time to comment. I don't know that I can agree with you about his father molesting him by teaching him to be sure to clean his ass in the shower. I think it is quite common as kids start growing up and showing independence needing to be told that they need to clean themselves and how. It's certainly fair to question the speed here but remember this has all transpired from them moving into the dorms at the beginning of August and this is now the first week of November. Can't wait to hear what you think of chapter 6!

@Exluke1 - You are so right keying in on how guys can be of two minds... pre and post nut. I certainly think that was happening here. It's that pre orgasm courage that pushes us to do things that our brain would stop us under normal circumstances. But this has been playing out now for months as you note. HUGE thanks for giving this so much thought.

@Eraj - Thank you so much, my friend. Really means a lot! Yes, that internal homophobia has hit some of us much harder than others and it's hitting Kyle extremely hard here where Sean has had a seemingly easy time coming to terms with who he is.

@DevonCowboy - huge thanks. Yes, we wanted this one to be a bit more of a rollercoaster and I am so glad that we appear to have pulled that off. THANKS so much for your support!

I was lately shocked that HIV is still breathing and living among people who are known for their love for breeding, sadly, google Zachary Willmore on instagram, 19-old and living with HIV. :(