All Comments on 'My Son's Friend is His Roommate Ch. 02'

Hate that this is so rushed!

Hey you have really hot ideas and a great theme going on, and even some decent characters. You’re writing is a bit rushed though: slow down, tell us how they feel. Let them talk dirty for a bit.

I’m a fan.

I like hearing how she feels, what she is thinking. It makes me feel I can relate, I can slip into her and enjoy the scene. I can be her for a while and live her experience. That is the magic I come here for. Keep doing it.