My Wife in Another Woman's Arms

"Yeah, ignore her. I'm keen to talk to you some more."

At the pub, we found a table, and the girls gave me their orders. I'm sure Ember, picked the most expensive dish just to piss me off. Sophie chose a cheaper one to balance it. Ella, and I chatted about the process, and if it would make it much more expensive if I included keyboards.

"Every instrument adds another layer of complexity. So, yes. The cost goes up. Like I explained earlier. It all comes down to time. If your keyboard player is familiar with your songs, and we can do it in a couple of takes. Then it won't add much cost. I have a Roland keyboard, a Yamaha baby grand, and a Leslie speaker."

"Wow, so Dale wouldn't have to bring anything?"

"Do you mean Dale Ketting?"

"Yeah, do you know him?" I asked curiously.

"Oh yeah. We played in a band together. I know him well. He's a fine player. He's got a good voice as well."

I chuckled softly. "Yeah I know. We played in 'Rising Swell' together."

"Wow, I heard you guys at the Rutherford. Yeah, I remember seeing you. I thought you guys had something going on?"

"It all crashed and burnt. Money, the usual."

"Shame." Our meals came, and it was Ember and Ella, doing most of the talking. I sensed a quiet unease on Ella's, part. Something had happened between them that's for sure. Sophie, talked mostly about Ella's, history, and what else she did. I sensed an interest, and she wasn't doing much to hide it.

Ella, also seemed keen to chat with her. It wasn't flirty, but it was personal, intimate.

On the drive home. Sophie, lost her innocence positively gushing about Ella.

Ember, laughed at her. "Slow down girl. Shit you've got a real girl crush going there. You'll make Prentiss, jealous."

Sophie, gasped and turned to stare at me as I sat quietly in the back seat. They dropped me off at my place, where Sophie, rushed to jump out and give me a long loving hug.

"You were great today. You sounded so amazing. Would you mind if I came out and listened when you do the recording in the evenings?"

"Yeah, no worries. I'm working nights the rest of this week, so if Ella's available. I'll be doing it during the day."

"Oh..." She sighed ruefully. "Maybe later then?"

"Yeah, if I'm going out there during the evening. I'll call you."

I sensed her unease, there was more she wanted to say but either didn't feel comfortable revealing, or was worried about how I would react. For me, I was torn, she clearly wanted to use the recording process as a chance to get back into my life.

That conflicted me... I had to admit that I still had feelings for her. Of that there was no escape.

Having her back, closer to me, if I was honest... I enjoyed it. Seeing her, listening to her laughter. Hearing her applauding my efforts, that felt great and was a real boost. The fact she still wanted to support me...

My first visit out to Ella's, studio by myself was absolutely fantastic. I played little excerpts from the twelve songs I selected, while she sat, listening, and taking notes. Her plan; start with the ones I felt most comfortable with. They would happen quickly because I already knew them so well.

Then we would move into the next ones, and start to unpick the bits that I didn't like. Her philosophy surprised me.

"Prentiss, if these songs aren't your favourites, but you think they're strong. There is obviously something inside them that you don't feel is one hundred percent."

"Wow, that makes sense." I replied quickly. It did make perfect sense.

"I'm a musician as well, and I can offer you a neutral ear. We can open up and interrogate the songs, find that small insignificant thing that irks you. It can be an enlightening process."

On my first visit, we recorded, and decided there was nothing more to add to them, except for Ella to sit with them by herself and tinker with different plug ins and effects.

I couldn't believe it, one day and two songs down...

Then my world got flipped upside down. One of the regular bar tenders was injured in a car accident, he was going to be off work for six weeks.

Because I wasn't full time, I got flipped to day shift to cover. When I told Ella, she was disappointed, but understanding. "Hey, I'm here at night as well. I would rather be recording you than watching TV."

"Sweet, what time works for you?"

"Six thirty onwards. I'm not a night owl though. I'll probably pull the pin about ten or eleven."

"No worries. Ummm Would it be all right with you if I brought Sophie, along?"

"Sophie, yeah, that'd be cool. She's a nice person, I like her. Just leave Ember, at home aye. She can bring too much negativity. I sensed you didn't get along with her anyway."

"Nah, she's not my first choice as a friend."

"Yeah, I'm with you there."

When I phoned Sophie, to see if she wanted to come along, she Grumbled. "Bugger, I would love to, but I have a yoga class at Seven on Tuesdays. I would love to Wednesday."

"Sweet, pick you up at Six on Wednesday. By the way. Don't invite Ember. Ella's, not a fan."

There was a brief pause before she replied. "Yes, I felt that vibe as well. I wasn't going to invite her anyway. I know you still don't get along."

We knocked off another song quickly. It only took three takes. I sat beside Ella, in the control room as she worked her magic. Adding effects, trialling different sounds. We drank a couple of beers as she picked away. Then got me to add another guitar track over the top, then, a vocal harmony over what was going to be a chorus.

As we sat, we talked, and I couldn't help but prod the beast. "If you don't mind me asking. What happened between you and Ember? You don't have to answer. I sensed a bit of anger yesterday."

"Yeah, we can talk. I met Ember, not long after I came back from Uni. I got a part time job at the agency where she works. She was wild and sexual and I was young and inexperienced. Still trying to discover who I was. She sucked me up into her world, and I fell in love."

I nodded, sipping my beer. "I can understand that. She's definitely got an aura, or something. So you're a lesbian?"

"Lesbian... No, not really. Yeah, she sucked me into her world, and at that time I wondered whether I was gay. She had me sucked into her circle. She professed her love, and I was hooked. I loved the crazy bitch. She can be a cruel cow though. She just walked away from me. Left me broken and a mental wreck."

"Wow, I'm sorry to hear that. You seem over it now though."

"Nah, not really. She still affects me... Seeing her again brought stuff that I buried a long time ago back to the surface. She's a player, a stemme."

"What does that mean?"

"She's the Les equivalent of a stud, she's a predator."

"Yeah, I get that from her. She certainly has a high opinion of herself."

"Oh yeah, her shit doesn't stink as far as she's concerned anyway."

I chuckled softly. "Sorry to laugh, but I feel the same. You said you were looking to sort out your life. Are you a lesbian?"

"Nah, After she walked away, I dated men and women. I'm bisexual. But now it's my turn. What's the deal between you and Sophie?"

That one made me wince. Did I be honest? I decided to get it all out. "We were married, for two and a half years. Actually, we are still married, but live separate lives."

"What happened." She asked between sips of her beer.

"Long story short. I caught Sophie and Ember, having sex."

"Oh shit." She gasped.

"Yeah, I didn't even know Sophie, was bisexual. Nearly three years together and she never once mentioned it. Caught me completely unawares. I flipped, got angry and walked away."

"Is there any chance of getting back together?"

"I don't know. I still have feelings for her. It was the lies, she carried on an affair for months and never said a bloody thing. I don't feel like I could ever trust her again."

"Yeah, it's hard rebuilding trust. Once it's broken it takes a lot of glue to put back together."

"I guess. Honestly, I still love her, every time I see her. My heart beats faster, she stirs emotions nobody else can."

"She is definitely very attractive, and I get a sense of warmth from her. Was she always bi?"

"Yeah, apparently. I'm supposedly only the second guy she has ever been with. We haven't talked about it that much. Every time she tried, I got angry and we started yelling and screaming... No, that's not true. It was me doing all the yelling. I had, have some real anger issues."

"I can imagine." She replied. "Would it have been different if she hadn't cheated?"

"I think so, I can't say for sure because I haven't been able to separate the two."

"You don't have prejudices towards gays?"

"No, well I didn't. Ember, makes me angry, but not because she's queer. Just because she's so narcissistic."

"Oh yeah. You're talking to the converted here dude."

We finished the third song... Three down.

The next night I picked up Sophie, she jumped in the car. Leaned over and hugged and kissed me. I explained about getting switched to days. She smiled replying. "I'm sorry, but I'm happy. It means I get to watch."

"Bullshit, it means you get closer to Ella."

Her face went bright red, and she gasped as if horrified. "What do you mean by that?"

"It means... I saw the way you looked at her. I'm no longer the innocent ignorant numbskull you used to be married to."

"Still am married to. She replied curtly. "Prentiss, I can't go through the rest of my life apologising to you. I am sorry for what happened. I did a terrible thing, and it makes me very sad seeing how much it still hurts you."

"No, I'm sorry. I need to stop throwing hand grenades. We have each got our separate lives to live now."

"I don't want them to be separate Prentiss. I am not hiding from the fact I want you back, I want our marriage back. I miss you more now than ever. I love being close to you, but it makes me want you more."

"Then what was all the gooey eyes for Ella?"

She giggled. "Okay, you caught me. She's very beautiful, and alluring and sensual. I admit being attracted to her. It doesn't mean I would act on it. I'm being selfish using this situation to force myself back into your life. I'm going to try and win you back."

"Oh yeah, and what if Ella, returned your interest and invited you into her bed?"

"I'm in a relationship with Ember, and I'm trying to win you back. I'm not risking any of that."

"I guess we'll see. What happens to Ember, if I said I wanted you back?"

"If I was lucky enough for that to happen. Ember and I would be over."

Ella, greeted us with big hugs as always, and we sat with coffees enjoying the last of the evening sunshine. Ella and Sophie, talked work and regular stuff. I could see Ella, opening Sophie, prising out her personal information about.

We started on the next song. This one I liked, but something always felt not quite right. There was something about it that didn't fit. I was never able to quite put my finger on it, but it was like a stone in your shoe.

I played it, staring into the control room at Ella, I could see she wasn't convinced. She walked back into the studio, "Have you always played it that way?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Would you be offended if I suggested something?"

"No, I'd be happy to hear it."

She got a Taylor guitar down off the rack, and we tuned up. She turned the music stand around so she could see the words, and started a picking sequence. Her vocals started hesitantly, but the new feel was lighter, not so oppressive. The picking pattern wasn't easy to duplicate. It took me a while before I started playing along, then singing with her.

It was one of those moment. The suggested change was not great, a little quicker, but the feel was lighter. We went over it a few times, and I loved it. Each time I played it, I felt happier with it.

After the fourth run through, Ella said. "What do you think?"

"I love it, you were right, I like the new feel."

"Choice, do yah wanna run it through?"

With the take completed. Ella asked me to add a lead riff over the top. Then another vocal track, and then another.

We all sat in the control room the girls with vodka premixes and me with a beer. Ella hit play, and as always made her adjustments as we listened. The song had changed, and from a rather dark place, it now emerged sounding lighter. Almost uplifting and for the first time since writing it. I was actually happy with it.

As the last note rang out. Ella, hit stop, and asked. "Well?"

Sophie, jumped in boots and all before I could say anything. "It's beautiful. So much nicer that way. I mean, I liked it before, but now... I adore it, I especially liked when you played and sang it together. That was special. If I knew which button to press, I would have rerecorded that."

I nodded. "You might be right. Ella, if you wanted to add your guitar and vocals, I would like to hear that myself."

She smiled, and squeezed Sophie's hand. "Thank you." She turned to me. "I'd be honoured to be on it, but I don't want you to feel like I pushed it towards that as an outcome. Like I'm imposing my will on you, it has to feel like your song."

"Nah, never thought that for a moment. It would create a point of difference to the other songs which would be nice."

"Choice, I'll have a play tomorrow, see what I can come up with."

On the drive home, Sophie seemed deep in thought.

"What'd yah think?"

"Oh god, I think it's beautiful. You're so talented. I can't believe this was hiding inside you. I used to watch and listen to you play, but really. I wasn't listening at all. Now I see this incredible light. Gosh, I love your songs so much." She stared at me, her eyes eating into me. "I love you so much."

"If I hadn't joined the band. I would never have been brave enough to do this. In many ways, if we hadn't split. This would never have happened, you know. Maybe it was a good thing."

She burst out crying, the tears really flowing. I could see her gasping for breath. I pulled over and drew her into my arms. Rubbing my hands over her back, I massaged and rubbed, hopefully soothing.

Eventually her tears turned to sniffles, and she said. "I hate thinking, we had to break up to release the real you. It painful to think about. I had to hurt you so much, every time I think about it I feel horrid."

"Sophie, we have to look at it as a positive. You're in the relationship you should have always been in. You were clearly never completely happy in our marriage."

"No..." She screamed. "That's a lie. I loved our marriage, our life together. I wouldn't have changed it apart from the end. I should have been honest, given you a chance... Explained what was going on inside my head."

I swallowed the snarky comment I was going to throw at her. It would solve nothing. In the end I went with. "At least you have Ember, in your life now."

"Yes, but I never wanted her to replace you. I would have been happier the other way around. If I had just been truthful, you would still be in my life."

I changed the subject back to the music, mostly because I felt my own emotions bubbling over. We talked about the process and how well it was working.

She gushed positively about the songs and how Ella, had been able to make them better. The next couple of days were repeats, every night. Ella, and I sat together, and we picked apart what I didn't like about the song we were about to record. It wasn't always the melody, or the music. Sometimes it was a lyric that didn't fit, or I couldn't get to flow, other times, it was simply the arrangement.

Once again, she approached it methodically. Her understanding of musical theory helped. What also helped was her understanding of the English language.

I barely finished high school, whereas she was a bloody genius. She masked it. Never shoved it in my face. She was respectful and generous. Not just with her time, but her talent.. She was clever enough to quickly learn, Sophie, was good with words as well. She loved poetry and had a collection, that was damned good. So she helped out, the pair of them sitting together, writing out replacement lyrics.

I watched them sitting together in the control room, joking and chatting. Drinking their vodka's. Often cuddling, it wasn't always about music either, I could see them becoming something deeper. It was like watching two people fall in love, the way they looked at each other, their eyes fixed on the other. The little gestures. A hand resting on an arm, a shoulder. The furtive questioning glances at me.

I shouldn't have been surprised. I saw it on their first meeting. The goo goo eyes, the flirty smiles. They were definitely into each other. It was painful in a way, because Sophie's, plan on ingratiating her way back into my life had been working. Now I watched her walking right back out of it.

The only good bit of it was... Ember, was finally going to get a taste of her own medicine. What shocked me was the speed of it.

Friday night, I turned down a gig to go out to Ella's, and continue the recording process. I picked Sophie, up as usual, but she wasn't her bright bubbly self. In fact she was sullen, and withdrawn. Generally on our drives out to Ella's, she was full of conversation. Work, music, my new songs. There was nothing, not a dickie bird. I left her to herself, if she wanted space, I could do that.

She leaned against the passenger window staring at the passing scenery. Her breath condensing on the glass. Her arms drawn tightly around her.

Out at the studio. Ella, picked up on it straight away. Rather than talk about which song I was going to work on, she dispatched me into the studio. I picked up her Maton. Damn I loved that guitar. It had a deep resonance, but still managed to hold timbre, it had highs, you had to wrestle them out, but they were there.

Tuning up, I peered through the glass, into the control room. Ella and Sophie, were already in deep conversation. Like a water pipe breaking. Sophie's, tears erupted like a geyser. Ella, wrapped her in her arms, and they hugged like it might be the last time. Through the thick glass, I couldn't hear what was being said, but it was apparently serious

Recording was clearly off the table now. Putting down the guitar. I walked through into the control room.

"What the hells going on?" I asked.

"Ember, has walked out. She apparently left to fly overseas today. Didn't even say goodbye to Sophie." Ella, whispered, as she patted and massaged Sophie's, back comfortingly.

"Oh shit. I'm sorry Sophie." I sighed.

She glanced up accusingly. "Are you Prentiss. It's what you wanted isn't it?"

"yes, but no. I never liked Ember, I won't lie about that, but. I thought you guys were good together."

She frowned, and a little smile washed it away. "Thank you love."

Jesus, I was getting better at telling lies. Ember, had mentioned she was leaving the day she came to visit me at the bar. I hadn't said anything to Sophie, because I wasn't sure if she was setting me up.

"Big guy, I don't think we're gonna get a lot of work done tonight. I'm not charging for any of this." Ella said apologetically

"Nah, that's sweet as. What do you wanna do?"

"I suggest, we go and raid the fridge and get totally shit faced." Ella, announced.

"Yay, I'm in." Sophie, replied. Trying to sound perky.

"You stay there, I'll get you girls another, and grab a beer."

"No beer tonight Prentiss, we're getting trashed and you're joining us. We girls don't like to drink alone."

"No, you're not getting off lightly young man." Sophie, added.

"You forget. I've gotta drive home."

"Fuck that dude. You can stay the night. I've got spare beds." Ella said firmly.

"Yeah all right. Let's do this thing." I walked out to the kitchen area, and looked into her drinks cabinet and fridge. I found lots of part bottles of booze, but that was a pathway to a seriously bad hangover I didn't want. I had a gig tomorrow out in Brightwater.