All Comments on 'New Female Boss Asserts Herself'

The point of view of your story changes too much for it to be very cohesive. You constantly change between first and second person.

There is even a point where you confuse the genders of your characters...

"I'm sorry Miss" I mumbled, embarrassed at his disclosure, "it won't happen again and I will make up the time, I promise.

The "his" in this case should be "her."

Please either double check your work or ask someone to proofread it.

Then it needs a good story. This was bollocks. He recorded the episode with his camera phone. She got fired, he got rich suing the company.

4+ (4.4 = 88%, ☆☆☆☆+)

Erotic-cum-kinky.