Nymphomaniac Chapter

I know I should have left when the others left the bar. I've had too many drinks and the little voice in me is getting stronger with every sip I take from the drink. I remember my last session with Dr. Jenkins, I remember how guilty and miserable I felt when she made me tell her what happened in the disco. It's not that she would tell me I'm guilty, not at all. She explains me it is not my fault and that we will get it under control. She is sure something happened in my childhood and wants me to remember, but I can't. She hypnotized me to help me go further back, but when I woke up again, she shook her head and told me we're not there yet. All I know is that I woke up on her couch, feeling wetness staining my thong. I wonder what I told her, but she never reveals. And as after each such session, I wonder how she never realizes the aroused state of my body.

My name is Judy and I'm a nymphomaniac.

And now I'm sitting alone in a bar, getting slowly drunk and I hear the little voice telling me it is dangerous, telling me Dr. Jenkins doesn't want me to get drunk because I loose control then and we both know where this ends. And the more I drink, the more I realize how lonely I am and how much I long for a loving embrace, a hug, a word of love and affection. I feel tears fill my eyes and I quickly get up, throw some money on the bar and leave.

The warm evening air caresses my face. I look for a cab, but there won't be one at that time of the day and I decide not to go back and ask the bartender to call me one but to walk home. My feet carry me into the darkness of the night and and I walk without paying attention which way they take. I feel the dress cling to my skin and the soft material caress my perky braless breasts as I walk, sending sensations of erotism and lust to my mind and my sex. My mind drifts back to last nights events when I had these two strangers take me in the dark corner of the disco, and I remember their hands, how they loved me, how these lips and touches made me feel wanted, important and loved.

I almost stumble and I realize I am walking on the gravel road that leads through the small park close to my apartment. The task of walking on high heels on the unpaved road stops my mind from daydreaming and brings me back to the here and now, to the dark night in the park, the only sounds coming from footsteps on the gravel. It is when I hear this sound that I realize I'm no longer alone. Somebody is with me in the park, following me and I walk faster, primal fear rising in my tummy, mixing with the arousal that was there moments ago. It is a strong sensation, one that makes me almost run.

I can almost feel his eyes on my back, peering at the paleness of my back's skin that is outlined by the blackness of my dress. He is behind me, just a few steps behind me and he stares at my firm body moving in the darkness, the firm body of a young woman in high heels and a short tight dress, her ass moving under the black fabric as she staggers on the uneven path, her high heels threatening her to loose balance. A sight that makes him move faster, I can hear it, and I realize he wants me, he wants my body against him, feel that skin and the sick part of me makes me realize I'm wanted, needed. I fight the mental picture of arms holding me, caressing me. I can see the exit of the park and the apartment building I live in, when I realize I no longer hear steps behind me and I relax. I walk slower and my mind drifts back to the mental picture of a stranger wanting me, caressing my skin and making me his prize in the darkness of the park. Something makes me stop and turn and I catch myself how I try to pierce the darkness under the trees, torn between fear and arousal. I sigh as the darkness remains motionless and I turn.

I never imagined shadows could move so fast. It fills my vision and then it hits me, wraps around me and covers my mouth, turning my startled gasp into a silenced 'mmff' as I'm being lifted off my feet and dragged into the darkness of the park. After a moment of shock, I start to struggle, still not understanding what is going on, but my body has a mind of its own and wants to get away. But strong arms pin mine to my body and my feet kick in vain, causing my high heels to fly and vanish out of sight as I'm being pulled into the shadows, away from the path.

My world spins and the air is knocked off my lungs as I hit the grass, pressed into it and pinned down by the weight of my attacker. I hear his breathing, loud, erratic as he wrestles me down. Something pushes in my belly and keeps me from breathing as he moves. The hand on my mouth is pulled away, only to grab my throat and squeeze, strangling the scream that tried to escape my open mouth. Fear explodes in my core as I choke, I squirm and kick violently, shaking my head but I cant stop it and I can't prevent something being pushed in my mouth and I taste rubber, pinning my tongue down. Bands are pulled around my head and then I hear a hissing sound as the thing in my mouth swells, filling it until I fear my jaw will pop out of its socket.

I'm turned on my belly and I scream my protest in the inflatable gag as my arms are violently yanked back and tied. And then suddenly the weight is removed. I turn on my back, trying to get on my feet and then I see him. Tall. Towering above me, the dark shadow of a man with a massive body as he stares down at me. I hear him breath fast and I realize it is not only from the exertion of wrestling me down. I know this breathing, it's the sound of a man wanting me. He kneels down and I smell the beer in his breath as his hands start to roam over my body, feeling the firmness of my breasts under the dress. His hands squeeze and I hear his breath quicken even more as he fondles my helpless body. I struggle, trying to get away from his searching hands that press against my flesh.

Muffled faint sounds escape the gag as I scream my protest. But the man won't stop. He wants me. And the other voice gets stronger, whispering 'He wants you, he wants you' all over. Fingers pinch my nipples through the dress and I wince as pain explodes in them, pain that sends sparks to my brain and my sex. He straddles my body, his knees on each side of it as he fondles me, his breathing fast and aroused. I can't recognize his face in the darkness, but I know his eyes are gleaming, gleaming in love for me. His hands move up my neck and tear the fabric that holds my dress. He pulls it down, almost tenderly, I feel the hands, covered in latex gloves tremble as he exposes my breasts. He almost moans as my nipples are exposed, hard, swollen nipples on pale breasts that ache to be touched and invite him to make love to my body. The mantra of the little voice has changed long ago, now whispering soothing 'He loves you, he loves you'.

The sensation of the latex covered hands on my skin is strange, cool, unhuman and yet it makes the nerves tingle and ache for more. He moves, his weight pining me down again as he lays on me, the weight causing my tied arms to press in my back and I protest. Hands move up and down my legs, moving as feverishly as his breath, as he squirms on me, forcing my legs to open under his weight. My legs have a life of their own as they move and kick, trying to stop it although the little voice in my brain tries to sooth them, telling them that it is ok, that he will LOVE me, if I only let him. I feel the smooth touch of the latex tug on my lace thong and then it tears, a sharp, short, ripping sound that opens me to him.

I feel the hardness of his manhood on my crotch as he fondles me, forcing my legs open more. He moves on me, squirms, his feverish breath telling me what he wants, as my futile squirming makes my mons rub on the hardness of his flesh. He shifts weight and I feel his hand between us as he fumbles with his belt and then the sound of his zipper tells me I'm only moments from feeling his love.

He is on me. Squirming, his breath in my face and ear, hoarse, needy as he moves. I fee the hardness on my lips, poking, trying to unite us. And then his breathing stops as I feel the blunt head open my lips and I know he now feels the heat and wetness of my lust kiss his the swollen head. And for the first time I hear him talk. Its is just one word that bursts from his mind as he feels my wetness and readiness for his love.

"Slut"

And then he is in me. Pumping. Thrusting. Love turned into hard flesh, penetrating my core. The thrusts making me want to moan, to scream, but the gag silences me, keeping me from getting as much air as the fire of my lust demands and I feel dizzy as he thrusts into me. My knees have long moved up and out, making way for his heavy body. His breathing is back to the fever pitch of a man who is about to be consumed by his lust as his cock pounds in me as if there would be no tomorrow.

I feel the smooth touch of the latex covered fingers move to my neck as his head covers the night sky above us. I know he looks at me, I know he loves me, his body can't lie, I feel the hardness of his love in me. I feel the heat in me grow, the lack of air caused by the gag and the loving embrace of his fingers make it grow only faster until it explodes and I cum under him. He groans and I feel the warmth of his love fill me as my walls milk and squeeze him as hard and as strong as his hands squeeze my throat. He has stopped moving, his manhood buried in me to the hilt. I feel the twitching of his cock answer the kisses of my womb every time he pumps his seed in my womb, I loose all touch with reality as the lust makes my body squirm and spasm, feet sliding and kicking over the grass as I ride the waves of my lust until they throw my into darkness.

I wait for the voice to come back. The other voice, the one that will tell me I did it again and what a fucking slut I am to cum like a banshee while I am raped and strangled until I black out. But I don't hear it. I only hear the sweet voice.

"There was nothing I could do" I whisper to myself as I get up. "He raped me. I was helpless" I tell myself over and over as I walk bare feet over the grass towards the exit of the park.

I won't call Dr. Jenkins tonight. I feel for the inflatable gag that is now in my purse. No, I won't call her. She doesn't need to know I won't lock my apartment door anymore.