All Comments on 'Outside on the Beach'

Loved it! A sequel would be great.

better still would be a third chapter.....;)

I was distracted by the bad writing. Need to reread before submitting, Many places things like "He kissed HIS neck" and words missing . This left me distracted from story which was good

It's funny how whenever someone bad mouths somebody on this site they're always too Cowardly to leave their name.

After reading your comment, I was somewhat bemused. Surely anyone that has their enjoyment of literature ruined by tiny grammatical errors (as you claim) has some kind of problem with their reading?

However, my interest was piqued, so I went to my document and searched for the phrase you claim was wrong, and any

variants.

Unsurprisingly, there weren't there.

Yes, please post a third chapter into this situation. I personally have a pretty major leg/stockings/foot fetish and your stories so far are keeping me right on the edge as if Evie will actually end up giving this guy a foojob or if he just pulls out and blasts her stockinged feet one time.

I think your writing is fine. Don't worry about the fools that nitpick your work, when you're reading the story and caught up in the moment, if I find something wrong you type, I know what you meant to say and I keep going, it's no big deal.

Listen to your fans, not the idiots. : )

Great work, keep it (and me) up!!

Beautifully written, this first chapter of this story is a marvelous tale of passion and love, with excellent characters and a romantic atmosphere throughout.