Paul and Linda

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Can two lonely thirty somethings find love.
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This story contains F/M sex.

Paul and Linda

My name is Paul Gianelli, and this is my story. It details how I went from crushing sorrow to profound joy. My mother always told me how in every life a little rain must fall but are we ever prepared for it.

My first serious love resulted in a wedding proposal and Mia's acceptance. College sweethearts I was clueless leading up to the day when she broke my heart.

However, none of what transpires after Mia would have been possible. It was two months before our wedding when she hit me on the noggin with something outlandish.

My first thought; she's cheating on me but apparently not.

"Paul, I love you, but I don't know if I'm in love with you enough to get married."

"Is there someone else?"

"No! I'm just not...ready."

Trouble is, I believed her.

"So, Mia, when do you think you'll be ready?" I asked scathingly.

"I'm not sure but I want to date other guys, kinda sow my wild girls' oats. I'm mean we've been exclusive since university, and I was a...ya know... a virgin."

"I'm supposed to sit tight while you screw around and when you've had your fill, come back to me? Is that your plan?"

"I don't want to be married for a few years and then get the itch to cheat. I'd rather get it out of my system now."

I gazed at Mia in disbelief, we'd been together for six years and this was the first time her preposterous behavior surfaced. Luckily, we hadn't planned on a big wedding, just a simple affair and cancelling would be easy.

"How long do you think this will take, the wild oats thing." My voice dripped with sarcasm.

"I dunno, six months, a year..."

"What am I supposed to do while this is going on?"

"Can you sit tight and be patient with me?"

"So, while you're out with other guys, doing God knows what, I'm supposed to...? Do I get to date other women? Sow some of my wild oats?"

"I hope not. That would really hurt me if you were with someone else. Can't you remain faithful to me?" I'll come back to you; I promise."

My world was sinking like the Titanic. I scarcely recognized the person sitting across from me. This couldn't be the Mia I knew and loved.

"Please try to understand."

"This makes absolutely no sense to me. You're a smart woman, you don't see the double standard here."

Mia was getting upset. I could tell by the set of her shoulders and her face took on a pinched look.

"Maybe, if you could get your head out of your ass for a minute, you'd see my point of view."

"Oh, so I have my head up my ass? Interesting."

"All right Paul, take it or leave it. I do love you, but I guess you don't love me enough to let me experience more of life."

"Mia, I love you, but this is utter bullshit! You should listen to yourself, pathetic!"

My soon to be ex-fiancé looked pissed off. I was supposed to just roll over and accept her ridiculous terms.

Then it hit me, a revelation. Mia's friend Dawn was always filling her head with nonsense. They worked together at the ad agency and became friends about six months ago. Dawn was twice divorced, she didn't believe in monogamy, slept around, and made no excuses for her behavior. Went through men with slutty zeal. Life was a party and she wanted to participate to the fullest. For the 'life' of me I couldn't understand why Mia liked her as a friend.

"I don't suppose any of this has to do with Dawn's ideas about monogamy. Her life is a lark, theory?"

Suddenly, Mia looked uncomfortable. I hit the nail right on the head. This was Dawn's doing.

"I thought so."

I threw two twenty-dollar bills on the table.

"That should cover the bill. I'm outta here. Have nice life."

"That's it! We can't discuss this like adults!"

"Discuss what? You want to runaround, sleep with other men while I wait like a cuckold fiancé for you. My dear, you are delusional. You need to get your head out of your ass!"

I stormed out but when I got to my car, I broke down and cried. I loved Mia but I would never tolerate her behavior. The next few days were difficult. I had to explain to family and friends that we were no longer engaged.

On Monday at work, I got a surprise visitor.

"Mr. Gianelli? A Dawn Markinson to see you. She doesn't have an appointment.

"Put her in conference room A."

When I walked in, I have to say she looked contrite but before I could say one word...

"Paul, I think you're making a big mistake. Mia is crushed. She cried the entire weekend. She just wants to have some fun, she loves you. She'll come back to you; I can almost guarantee it."

I was gazing at Dawn with a fury that I had never experienced.

"This is your doing. Are you happy that you busted up a great relationship?"

"Of course not, but if you could just see it from her side."

"I see it for what it is. It's a lame excuse to party, fuck other men and when she's had her fill, and we don't know how long that will be, return to my loving arms. All's well that ends well. Hmm?"

Dawn looked a little flustered.

"Well...yes...something like that."

"Get out of my office, now! You put all this garbage in her head. Oh, the good life...never settle for one man when dozens will do the trick! Take this to heart now, never come back here again, I never want to see you or hear from you, ever! Is that clear?"

"Paul, please, Mia is devastated."

"If she wants to talk to me have her call but YOU, stay out of my life!"

Dawn turned and left in a huff. Not more than an hour went by,

"Mr. Gianelli, Mia on line 2."

Mia was desperate to talk to me, but she wanted to do it in person. I agreed to meet her at a quiet little Bistro in Old City, where she lived.

Purposely, I was late and when I sat down, her eyes looked swollen and red. We ordered our favorite wine and waited until it was served.

"Thanks Paul."

"What's on your mind?"

"I was hoping that we could come to an agreement, not end things like this. I love you."

Mia had always been a self-assured confident young woman, but I could see that she was struggling.

"What agreement are you talking about?"

"It's because of my love for you that I want to put the wedding on hold until I can sort my life out. I've never been with another man, and I have this...I guess desire, to find out what it's like. I will and I mean will come back to you and we can go on as before. Get married, have children."

"Not a chance. Mia, you know me, you know I'd never put up with you sleeping around, even with one man. That would be the end of us. If you decide to pursue this fantasy, then I have no choice but to say it's over."

Mia's gaze darted around furtively. I could tell she was desperately trying to find a way to have her cake and eat it too.

"But if it was only one guy?"

"It would be one guy too many."

Mia sighed. This was not going the way she thought it would.

"So that's it? You don't love me?"

"Yes, I do love you but not on the terms you're proposing. Once you cross the line, then..."

Mia squared her shoulders.

"I was hoping that you could be an adult and see my side, but you must be blind. I'll say it again, don't you love me?"

"Yes." I sighed,

"Then let me spread my wings and see life, gain some knowledge. If you let me do this, I'll be the best girlfriend, fiancé ever! I promise!"

Exasperation was setting in, my feelings were raw, and we were getting nowhere, fast!

"Mia, we're at an impasse here. I don't see any logical resolution. I think its best that we go our separate ways."

The moment had arrived, either shit or get off the pot.

Mia started crying but it quickly turned to anger.

"Dawn was right. You're just too stubborn to see things my way. It's your way or the highway, so I guess it's the highway."

Mia stood up to leave.

"Bye Paul, I hope your happy!" she said angrily.

"Bye bitch." I muttered under my breath.

Now, I'd be a poor storyteller if I didn't elaborate on two events that transpired with Mia.

Six months after our relationship took a nosedive, I found out from Mia's mom, who I still had a good relationship with, that she got herself knocked up. Apparently, it was a random hook up, she was very drunk and unable to recall who barebacked her. Why she wasn't on the pill is a mystery to me. And guess who she was with? Yep, her pal Dawn. Probably egging her on. I was positive that her Catholic faith was the reason she didn't get an abortion.

Lucky for Mia, she had a very well-paying job in advertising, but single parenthood can be a struggle. Opportunities to date and continue 'sowing her wild oats' were severely hampered. Dawn dropped her as a friend because Mia was too busy with the baby and motherhood.

Mia's parents lived in Pittsburgh, clear across Pennsylvania, so they weren't much help, and she was essentially on her own.

A year later, I had the opportunity to go jogging with a female friend down in the Penn's Landing part of the city. It didn't occur to me at the time that Dawn lived nearby in Old City. I was lagging behind when I saw a woman pushing a baby carriage. As I got closer, my heart nearly stopped, it was Mia.

Mia stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me. She'd gained a lot of weight and it didn't look good on her. I should have just kept going but...

"Hello, Mia."

"Hi Paul."

I waved Kim on and shouted that I'd meet her at the coffee house a few blocks away. Mia looked sad until I looked in the pram and saw the baby. She, judging by the pink blanket, was adorable. For some reason it made me smile. I've always had a soft spot for children.

"What's her name?"

"Oh, Sierra."

"Nice name."

For some reason I couldn't tear my gaze away from the cute tyke. We found a bench to sit on and were silent until the baby started fussing.

"She's hungry, I better feed her."

Suddenly my heart plummeted. Sierra could have been my child, instead, she'd probably never know her father.

"How have you been Paul? You look healthy."

"Good, how about you?"

"Ok, considering..." she gestured toward the baby.

"Been tough?"

"That's putting it mildly."

"How's your friend Dawn?"

Mia cringed and I could see tears in her eyes.

"Dropped me like a hot potato. You were so right about her. I was a stupid fool to listen to her bullshit. Threw the best thing I had away. Now look at me, a fat single mother with no social life. I've dated but all they want to do is screw me and I never hear from them again. Yeah, it sucks to be me."

"I'm sorry Mia. I'm sorry it turned out this way for you."

"Don't be sorry. I let it happen. I let Dawn fill me with that live life to fullest crap when I had all that I needed right in front of me!"

A despairing silence set in. What else could be said?

"I'd better be going." I said with sadness.

"The funny thing is...I still love you. I had this crazy idea that I'd have some fun and we'd get back together, what a complete and utter fool I was."

The moment was so somber I started to get teary.

"Bye Paul. Think about me occasionally but just the good times, Ok?"

****

The years after Mia were lonely. I never found that elusive thing called, love. I dated and had relationships but nothing that stirred the heart strings. They'd last for a few months sometimes longer, but always fizzled. Too bad, but I could not commit to anyone.

My employment as an attorney kept me busy and I had plenty of extended family for companionship.

Always a devotee of fitness, I was approaching my middle thirties when I got the bug to start bodybuilding. I ran into a friend at the gym I frequented, and he was positively ripped. While I thought he was a very shallow person, I had to admit he looked fantastic.

"The chicks love it dude! I get lots of tail!"

However, I decided that I wanted to try it to improve my self-image and my appearance. When I consulted a well-known respected trainer, we talked about my goals, realistically. He explained that it would take a year maybe more but if I stuck with his program, I'd see results. I did.

After year one, Nick, asked if I would be interested in competing in a bodybuilding show. There would be hard work, dieting and the commitment alone would try my patience. I accepted the challenge and to this day, I'm so glad I did.

Nick drove me hard toward my goal and at my first show, I placed second in my age group. We discussed me doing another and I finally said, yes. Six months later I was contest ready.

Nick wanted to get to the contest early to see the women compete first. We were scrutinizing the stage when a girl in the mid-thirty age group captured my imagination. My trainer told me her name was Linda and she competed out of the Collegeville Sports Club. Why she completely fascinated me, I had no clue because I'd seen plenty of awesome female physiques, but this was much more than that. There was something about her.

Nick, my trainer told me that Linda was a professor of European Studies and much smarter than your average girl. But initially her physique and that elusive something else, captured my attention. She was what we call a Nat or Natural body builder that never used any performance enhancing drugs. I loved the fact that she was tall, at least five nine or ten. Long pronounced muscles on her lean frame were eye catching but she also looked so beautifully feminine, lithe, and sleek, like a benign tigress.

At first, I detected some shyness, but I was drawn to her. Did I have the smarts to hold an intelligent conversation with this striking woman? I sure hoped so!

Linda placed first in her women's age group and second overall. Afterwards I went to congratulate her.

"Hey, I'm Paul and I wanted to say...congrats...you looked...I mean look great."

"Thank you. When do you compete today?"

"Ah, probably in an hour."

"Mind if I stay and watch?"

"Of course not. Thanks. That's very kind of you."

"Think nothing of it." she said sweetly.

Almost immediately I detected a kind of connection. Hell, if I knew what it was at the time, but this beautiful woman captivated me. Bodybuilders often support each other, even if they don't know the person.

Linda had a low, breathy voice that wowed me and there was a distinct clarity about it that was very impressive. I imagined sitting in her class listening to her lecture in near rapture. The woman could have read the phone book and made it sound interesting.

Since I knew that Linda was watching, it gave me that much more incentive to do my best. I was disappointed when I placed second and third overall but not bad for my second competition. Many more men compete than women.

After I changed, I saw Linda waiting for me near the stage.

"Hey, thanks for staying." I said humbly.

"You did so well. Are you disappointed?"

"Yes and no. This is my second show, and I was determined to come in first but...that's life!"

Linda looked like she was waiting for me to say something. There was an absence of rings on her ring finger left hand and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"I know we just met but I'm starving as I'm sure you are. Can I take you to dinner? Chadwick's Steakhouse is close by."

Linda mulled it over briefly before accepting but insisted on going Dutch.

"I'm gonna call my trainer to let her know my plans but you do look trustworthy. Anyway, I'm well versed in Martial Arts too, just in case you get out of line."

We both chuckled heartily but I believed she could easily kick my ass.

"Hey, I gotta tell mine also, I don't want him to worry about me."

This time we laughed, and it broke the ice.

All bodybuilders diet stringently to reduce their body fat to ten percent or under. The loss of fat while maintaining muscle is very important to show the striations and definition in the muscle. Eating sumptuously post show is like a rite of passage.

We met at Chadwick's, and we were seated in a quieter area of the dining room. Linda ordered the sixteen-ounce filet mignon with several sides, pricey but I simply followed her lead. A nice Bordeaux wine would go very well with the meat course and we each ordered a glass. When the waitress brought us our bread, we both attacked it.

"I never thought anything could taste so good." Linda sighed.

After the salad course and waiting for our steaks, it gave us an opportunity to talk.

"Nick tells me you're a professor. Where do you teach?"

"At Penn and two summer classes at Temple. I love teaching but I'm thinking of renting a shore house in Cape May this July. I'd prefer August but it's a little steep price wise for me. What about you?"

"Oh, I'm just a garden variety lawyer. Work the corporate side though, hours are more reasonable, weekends off, more job stability and the moneys good."

We chitchatted amiably and as I said earlier, I was drawn to Linda. She was very, very pretty, beautiful really with dark brunette hair, cute nose, alabaster skin tone and a lovely smile. We discussed bodybuilding and I discovered that she was in her fifth year, loved it, loved how it made her body feel and look. But dating was difficult.

"I'd think you'd have guys crawling all over you for a date."

"No, a majority don't like women with muscles, unless they body build and even then..." she said wistfully.

When our steaks came, we concentrated on them instead, but I was impressed by how gracefully she ate.

"Where are you from?" I asked.

"A little town and I do mean little called Newport. Its halfway between Penn State and Harrisburg on Route 322. Very bucolic. My folks own a dairy farm, very hard, never-ending work. The physical nature meant I was strong for girl, but I liked it. However, my mother was determined that I do something with my life. She pushed me to succeed academically and in sports. You?"

I told Linda that I grew up in Norristown, near Philadelphia, in an ethnic family of crazy Italians, who I loved dearly. We were close knit and usually in each other's business, very much like "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" I went to Penn State which is how I knew where her hometown was located. At first, I was thinking of majoring in business but was leaning more toward the law.

"It's kinda amusing that you teach at Temple because I graduated from law school there."

Then, out of the blue, I hit on something that we were both passionate about. When I asked Linda if she was familiar with Geno's and Pat's steaks in South Philly, she knowingly nodded.

"After a Sixers or Flyers or Phillies game, I usually get a cheese whiz, with." ('with' means with grilled onions)

I stared at Linda for the longest time.

"Are you ok? Did I say something wrong?"

"I'm a huge Philly sports fan and I always stop for a cheesesteak after a game. How is it possible that I never ran into you? Someone as lovely as yourself, I would remember..."

"Thanks Paul, but it's generally so mobbed there. I don't have a preference and go to the one with the shorter line."

"Linda, I know we just met but I have tickets to the Phillies game tomorrow, three hundred level under the overhang. My buddy bagged out on me at the last minute. I was gonna go by myself and give the other ticket away but..."

Linda's eyes grew wide at my offer, and I could see she was entertaining the idea.

"Yeah Paul, I'll go. I'm a big fan and it's an unbeatable offer. Just remember that I...can kick ass but...no need to bring that up again." She said shyly.

Linda lived in Collegeville very close to the gym she trained at while I was in Eagleville. Close to each other, only a stone's throw away.

"The game starts at seven, so I could pick you up at five?"

"Do you mind if I drive, Paul? I just leased a BMW and I'm dying to take it for a longer run."

"No problemo, as the Terminator would say. I'm not a nervous passenger so, ok by me."

Linda chuckled and I was blown away at how guileless and charming she was, easy to talk to and friendly.