All Comments on 'Persistent Ch. 02 - Alternative End'

I like your story. I want to know more. Looks like lindas and nicks story isnt finished. Theres more to tell

Anonymous user, "Looks like lindas and nicks story isnt finished. "

You may be right but that wasn't the story I planned in the first place. I just wrote this chapter for the ones expecting it to go this way. Thanks for your kind comment.

Wow this writers opinion of women is crazy.

much better then the first P2, was hoping you would elaborate on the trip and what he got Linda to do behind hubby's back, with him none the wiser. But still much better.

Not much of a story. Power trip for a psycho. You should get some help.

A horrible story about a weak husband and weak, tucked up wife. Half the story was wasted on the husband whining and looking the other way.

@Bham487: "Wow this writers opinion of women is crazy."

In fact it's just the opposite. I had trouble writing this version. I despise wimp guys like Paul or misogynists like Nick. I don't fancy women like Linda as well but Nick had to hit a wall and Paul was collateral damage (he deserved it in the original story).

About this version; I mislead some readers in the first chapter so...

Feel obliged to comment because did so on the initial pieces. This alternative to chapter 2 reads like an outrageously bizarre spoof, but not a very humorous nor entertaining one. Appears to have been written overnight and as you say to satisfy some readers (?), which is unfortunate, but it is your story and your time. Do hope you move on from Nick, Paul and Linda, though Linda from the first two chapters is a character with “meat on her bones”. She is 3 dimensional.

@Migbird, let's not say 'satisfy' but I noticed that I wasted some reader's time due to possible wrong category choice or the build up in the starting chapter of the story.

But also I get that writing about how I prefer is easier and better than trying to provide 'what is expected'. Your comment is duly noted.

TBS- Bitch and asshole were dead day 1! Visit to his widow same day.

Yeah, it can go lower, the latrine is deep enough.

Nothing here to like. Plot still one dimensional but the characters more infantile borderline to annoying.

Captcha

Like that you respond as an author to some comments — means something to those of us who take piece seriously. So, curious about your response to my comment, notably: “… I get that writing about how I prefer is easier and better than trying to provide 'what is expected'. Whose expectation? First two chapters resonated in uncomfortable way — good for you as a writer. The “alternative” left much to be desired — nothing to do with outcome. Hope to see you continue to share.

@Migbird, if I understood your question correct:

'Expectation' from my category choice, would be my answer.

I've read many stories in LW category and they are mostly built on cheating (especially wives). and there was a comment reminding me that. I decided that my choice of category mislead some readers (doesn't matter if it's minority) so I tried to go to that direction and see how it went.

It didn't go well and I figured out that I should stick with my preferences in the future.

But I knew that when I was posting, so I wrote that in the beginning, because someone feeling fine with the original chapter wouldn't like this one. I still posted it because someone could like it.

I won't continue with that alternative but for the original, I will try to go on when I have time.

Thanks again.

Alternate endings should at least try to be better than the original.

You just tripled down and an already terrible premise.

I liked this better than the other evening. Would like to see Paul warm up to the idea a bit and listen to Linda taunt him while giving him handjobs for example. Warm up to the idea of light humiliation so to speak. Though Nick is a piece of shit so would be better if the person she slept with had a better personality

@Ahboom: I understand but the cuckold universe is a bit too heavy for me and I cannot empathize well with that situation. This was as far as I could go. Thank you for your comment.

I didn't like the original ch.2 This version wasn't good but less bad.

I hope someone write a good chapter 2 where the husband isn't a wimp and the asshole gets punished.

@Infosauger, besides my comment to yours (at the bottom) this is a general response to something I can not understand. That's why it's long.

I don't understand that:

Do all readers who hope that the husband wins, see themselves in that character or is it about a secret code such as 'husband never loses'? Any husband? The personality doesn't matter? I don't see such comments in stories where the husband cheats.

My code for the character in the story is : Be man enough, don't lose or lose like a man. Or be a woman enough, win or lose like one.

We're talking about people, not wives or husbands.

The main story (not the alternative ending) isn't about that. It is about a wimp who loses like a wimp, a reckless woman with 'winner beauty' who manages to survive her mistakes by choosing being selfish and a SOB, who's future is still unknown.

Since the characters aren't some people we like them to be and since they have their own personalities, the husband has always been a wimp, since the start.

Why? Because I made him like that.

Why? Because I don't like such people. I knew he was going to lose and I gave him that personality, so that I wasn't going to feel sorry for him. Why are you sorry for him?

He was a wimp before anything happened. Clinging on the secure boundaries of his 'perfect looking' life,

I told that in detail.

Anyone hitting the jackpot by chance and trying to preserve it by acting cautiously is a wimp. You become yourself whey you're with your wife, you don't act all the time. You 'Exist' in times of crisis, you shape your future.

That's why he's a wimp. It doesn't require being inactive when the wife is unfaithful, not necessarily. He is plastic, lacking depth, he wants to look like a magazine model with his perfect wife.

At that point, there are two options. You can relate yourself with him or not.

If you despise him, why are you sorry for him? Don't you know that there are people in the world who deserve what's coming?

We have three characters, all lacking dignity in some way, that's the story.

Why would anyone want that wimp to win? That's the worst character in the whole story. He can't leave, he can't stand up.

*****That part is an answer to your comment only:

About the other path you prefer, the one that you're willing to read.

Will that do-gooder write a "good" 2nd chapter by making the wimp husband a dignified, hard working, self confident one? Out of the blue? He's stronger than the SOB but he doesn't have the guts or determination to confront him or leave his wife. Because that's what he is.

I'm not relating myself with any of the characters, I advise you to do that.

Thanks for the comment though.

just wanted to say - this was the hottest story i've read in a long time - it being so drawn out made me yearn for the moment of sex just as much as Linda. Super smart and tantalizing. I was racing to the moment it may happen - and also sort of dreading it!

I also really loved living through so much without knowing to what extent Linda had given herself to Nick, then seeing what was really happening, and how much she had given in (and how much he was dominating her)

I would LOVE LOVE another story like this - and if you do - the one thing I would ask is to draw out those few moments where the submissive gives in. Since we have been waiting for so long to get to those moments, I want to live in them for a while. Getting every details, thought and dirty exchange. It's like the tease on the tease!

@Anonymous,

First of all, thank you for your nice comments.

.

"Since we have been waiting for so long to get to those moments, I want to live in them for a while."

I see your point.

I probably was too carried away with the psychological parts, I may have neglected the action related sections.

And, probably I felt like it could be boring if I stayed in the details that much.

I'll keep that in mind next time.

(Same anon as below) Totally get you - and it’s your story and your style, so you aren’t beholden to any of these comments.

Thanks again for the great stories - can’t wait for the next one. I’ll keep my fingers crossed it’s something in the same vein as this one!

Thanks (Thumb up emoticon here)

I'm responding to your long note below that talks about reactions to the original chapter 2. I can tell you exactly why people hated it and they break down to the squirrels, the cucks and the BTBers. The squirrels are just looking to get their nut after all the amazing lead up in chapter 1 and there was a sad story with no appealing characters and nothing worth jerking off to. The cucks get off on the humiliation tied to sex; you gave them plenty of the former but it was fucked up, sad and psychological. They (I think) want to see the cuck's distress come from the pleasure his wife derives from another man. The wife totally lives her wife the way she wants and that infuriates the BTBers. So basically very few were happy with that original chp2.

My 2 cents, for whatever that's worth.

@CZOFTW,

In fact, sometimes I also feel frustrated when I read pages to see the events unfold to something else than I expected them to.

That's why I'm fine with any sincere complaints. As long as they are inline with the given category, description, tags. I always assume I may have mislead some of the readers in such cases.

I value everyone's time as I do mine.

Also, someone who never read my other stories may expect more sex instead of the psychology of the hard times/situations.

I can say that BTBers will never find happiness in my stories, I like to see women win in most of the cases. Except, of course, if the male character is a good one, one who definitely is not a BTBer.

Thanks for the comment.

Please, please, please contribute this alternative ending series. Please. It's a humble request. Loved this part.

Thank you but I have no further thoughts about the alternative part. I already put anything I had in that direction to this chapter.

I have an outline for the normal story but it will have to wait for a period.