All Comments on 'Price of a Latte'

Hot idea. Two constructive criticisms. One...you can do more with the public nature, to make the reader get a bigger sense of it. He could ring someone up, or she could be more aware of the customers in the cafe, that sort of thing.

You're changing point of view just about every other sentence. Sometimes the female MC is I, sometimes she, sometimes you. First person, third person, second person. That's the sort of thing that improves if you set it aside for a while then read it again. You'd probably notice it pretty quick. If not, a beta reader is a great thing.

Keep switching between perspectives. Horrible reading experience.