Punk

I didn't know how old I was the first day I saw him. I could remember the day and everything about it, but it was like a day out of time. The first notable thing was that I had a new dress and my parents had fought about it. Mama had said I was old enough and it was the fashion, but Daddy didn't like that it came all the way up to just below my knees. It showed too much leg by far. He and Mama argued, which wasn't something they often did. Mama always acceded to his wishes, but this once she stood her ground and told him I wasn't going to be the only girl in school to be wearing old fashioned clothes so I'd be singled out and teased. It had happened to her and she wasn't going to allow it for me.

I got the dress and I got to wear it the very next day. I'd been proud of that dress and I'd walked with my head high, smiling at people I'd never looked up at before.

That was the day I saw HIM.

He was beautiful with his blonde curls and full lips. His broad shoulders filled out he black jacket he was wearing as he laughed with his friends. I knew by their look, by the way they dressed that they were the outcasts and thugs.

But he was so perfect.

I stood there staring until the bell rang, then I watched him and his friends pull out cigarettes and duck out a side door.

I daydreamed about him and watched him in the halls. I knew he was older, but I didn't know anything about him at all. He never once looked in my direction.

Until the day he did.

I was a junior then and I was sitting in class and the door was open, along with all the windows on an unusually hot day. All the girls who had them had even taken off their neckerchiefs, even though they were all the rage.

My desk was closest to the door, I was short and needed a front seat so I didn't have to try and see over someone in front of me.

I looked up at movement in the hall and he was there, walking and his eyes met mine and swept over me as he paused a moment.

In the middle of algebra, he walked right into class and took hold of the top of my desk, leaning in to put his face right in mine.

"Mr Albright, get out of my classroom!" Mr Timmons yelled loudly. "Get out right now or I'll see you expelled!"

"What's your name?" the boy asked me, ignoring the teacher.

"Cassidy?" I answered breathlessly, staring into his beautiful brown eyes.

"How old are you Cassidy?"

"Sixteen?"

He gave a nod, then smirked at me. "Then I'll see you in two years, baby."

Standing, he left the room and I sat there trembling and trying to gather myself.

Had that really just happened?

Albright. His last name was Albright. Why hadn't I asked HIS name?

Because I was terrified and flustered and completely brain dead as it was happening.

After that day, he watched me in the halls and gave me that smirk of his, but never talked to me again that year.

The next year, he wasn't at school, but I'd found out quickly that he worked at the filling station now and fixed cars. The first time Daddy pulled up to have his car filled, Albright winked at me with his grin.

As soon as we pulled away, Daddy started in. "Don't know why they have a punk like him working there! That used to be a good place with good Christian people. I don't care how good a mechanic he is, he's still a punk!"

"What did he do?" I asked, curious about this new development. Daddy knew who he was.

"What HASN'T he done? That boy's been arrested no less than 5 times for vandalism, loitering and damage to public property, him and his friends! They're a menace! And he's the ringleader! That boy needs to be put away for good! This town doesn't need punks like him!"

I looked back, but the filling station was long gone from view now.

"He used to go to school with me, but I didn't even know his name," I offered, hoping Daddy would say his name.

"Good! You don't even need to know about his sort! You have exactly the sort of friend a girl like you needs right now! Speaking of, I heard Jenny is in the church choir now, why don't you join her?"

"Because I couldn't sing if my life depended on it."

"I hear you sing all the time with your records and that awful music you play."

"It's rock and roll, Daddy, and it's fun. Just because I sing along doesn't mean I have a good voice, it just means I'm having fun."

"I catch you dancing like those fools I seen on the news, I'll break every record you have, then that record player!"

"Yes Daddy," I sighed.

"Martin, don't be too hard on her! All the kids her age listen to that music and it's harmless."

"Have you SEEN the way they're all dancing, Linda? It's vulgar is what it is!"

I sighed again and thought about him. I only knew his last name, so I thought of him as Albright.

We saw him almost every time we went to the filling station after that and he always smiled at me and winked when Daddy wasn't looking. I blushed every single time and wished I could speak to him.

It was winter when I saw him away from the filling station. Mama had run out of eggs and she needed some right away but Daddy wasn't home. I got to drive alone for the first time up to the store.

As I opened the case for eggs, he came around the corner, looking at the bottles of milk. I stared open mouth and his eyes shifted to me, then he grinned. Ignoring the milk and the eggs in my hand, he moved in close, backing me to the cooler behind me and putting his hand down on the ledge of it.

"Hey Cass. How old are you now, baby?"

"Seventeen?"

"How long till your birthday?"

"July?"

"July what?" he asked, cocking his head and running a grease stained thumb down my jaw.

"21st."

"July twenty first. Keep a countdown, baby. July 21st, you're mine," he called, stepping back and turning to get his milk.

I stared, then came to myself. "Wait! What... what's your name?"

He laughed then, his eyes lighting up as he stepped closer again. "What does your pop call me, baby?"

"Daddy? He... he calls you a punk, or a menace."

"Sounds about right," he smirked. "You can call me that, baby."

I stared after him as he left, still flustered and confused. I got all the way to the door before I remembered I had to pay for the eggs and hurried back.

That night, Daddy stormed into my room. "What's this I hear about that Albright punk putting his hands on you, Cass? Did he hurt you?"

"What? No! Who told you that?"

"Myrna Floyd called your mother as soon as she got home from the grocers! By now it's all over town that he laid hands on you!"

"No, Papa, he didn't hurt me. He... he said I had something on my cheek and wiped it off. That's all."

"Did you ask for his name?!? She said you stopped him and asked what his name was."

"I did..." I stammered. "It was only polite to thank him and learn his name."

"You stay away from that punk! He comes near you again, you come tell me right away so I can have him arrested! I mean it, Cass! You stay away from that boy, he's dangerous! I ought to go with my shotgun and tell him to stay away!"

"He didn't DO anything, Daddy, he was just being polite! It was the christian thing to do, to be kind even to those like him, isn't it?"

"You just stay away from him and his kind altogether! You see them you walk the other way!"

"Yes Daddy," I nodded, though I knew I was lying to his face. I wasn't going to walk away from him at all. He wasn't a punk, not to me. He was beautiful.

After that, Papa wouldn't let me go to the store for the rest of the winter. Not until spring came and his business picked up. He had to work later and Mama didn't like driving at all.

I found out that my Punk came in almost every morning before he went to work to get a coke and cigarettes. When he saw me in the store, he would come to where I was and look me over, then ask me how many more days.

I always knew the answer, I was counting down the days myself.

The day after school let out, Daddy came home ranting and raving about the local punks and what they'd all done to the teachers houses. "That Albright boy is behind it, I know it!" he yelled. He needs to be arrested and run out of this town for good! The sheriff won't do anything about him, says he has no proof of who did it, and it had to've been a whole gang of them because of how many houses were vandalized in such a short time. There may have been several of them doing it, but he's the ringleader!"

"Why would he do it?" I asked curiously. "He's not in school anymore, what does he care about it?"

"He's still a punk and people like him continue to torment the good people of this town, especially the ones who've always known what they were and let them know it! Every one of those teachers told him and his friends they were no good and wouldn't amount to anything! Anf they were right! Look at all of them! Albright has a nowhere dead end job, just like him and most his punk friends don't even work! What kind of man doesn't work? No kind, that's what. Just trash, all of them!"

He went on and on, all through dinner, but I stopped listening.

That May I graduated from school and for the first time I got to wear a kerchief tied around my ponytail. Daddy had said it looked ridiculous, those and neckerchiefs both. When he saw most the women at church wearing them, he finally relented and told me I could wear one, but only on my ponytail.

The Sunday after I graduated, Daddy surprised me by inviting David Harper over for dinner. David was four years older than I was and very active in the church. He had a smile that was like a line on his face, no lips at all and his glasses made his eyes look huge like he was constantly startled. He even talked like loud noises would bother him.

Daddy smiled and jollied him along, trying to get him to talk and get me to talk to him, but I stayed quiet and asked to be excused as soon as dinner was over.

The next Sunday it was John Riley, a farmboy whose parents went to our church. John spoke to me a lot more than David had, but I hardly spoke to him unless I was answering a question. Again, I asked to be excused quickly.

Two days later it was Emmett VanDenBurg, a man in his late twenties who worked at the bank. He pursed his lips as he looked me over and looked at my father like he was trying to sell him a lame horse.

Daddy invited more men over, but it was John who came most often, smiling at me and talking to me and inviting me to take a drive with him.

I put him off and put him off even though he was a handsome enough man with his brown wavy hair and nice blue eyes. He was always nice and polite, but he wasn't the one I dreamed about.

My Punk.

I saw him at least once a week and always, he would smile and ask me how many days. I was more thrilled every time, the day getting closer and closer.

The weekend before my birthday, Daddy surprised mom and I with a picnic up at the lake, then surprised us even more by inviting John along. John smiled at me and sat by me, talking to me. Daddy kept giving me encouraging smiles.

After lunch, John asked if I'd like to go out on the dock and put our feet in the water.

"Of course she would!" Papa called for me. "You two go and talk!"

John offered a hand to help me up, then didn't let my hand go as he walked me down to the dock and all the way to the end. There were other people there, but most were swimming and playing volleyball on the shore. Daddy had about turned us around when he saw the girls in swimsuits.

I pulled my hand away to sit down quickly and unlace my shoes. John sat entirely too close, almost hip to hip with me.

"So," he smiled as soon as my toes were in the water and his legs were in the water up to his calves. I had to stretch to get my toes in. "Guess you know what this is all about?" he asked with his charming grin.

"Do I?" I asked, then barely caught myself from going in by stretching too far.

John caught me quickly and pulled me safely back, then kept his arm around my shoulders. "Easy there! Unless you're wanting to take a bath!" he teased.

I managed a smile, but I was supremely uncomfortable with his arm around my shoulders.

"So, I was thinking, Cass."

"Were you?"

"I was. I was thinking about us. I know we haven't stepped out proper or gone on many dates, but your dad is more old fashioned than most. He and I talked and he has agreed heartily that we'd make a good match."

"Match?" I asked faintly, knowing I sounded droll.

"Married. I think we'd make a great match, you and I, don't you? I haven't had the chance to tell you really, but I think you're beautiful and sweet, a wholly lovely little creature. I'd get you a ring and I already have a house and a good piece of land. A couple cows and a whole lot of chickens. I have my own truck and I'm about to get a new tractor. A nice shiny red Farmall, best there is. I'd take care of you and make sure you had all you need and I'd have a gentle hand with you. I don't have a temper at all to speak of."

"This is all... very sudden. I'd like some time to think on it, please," I told him politely, knowing full well I wasn't going to do any such thing.

"Of course, I'd expected you would. You think you might know by next weekend? I intend to come back into town next Saturday, but I could come back any day you like if you had your dad phone me. I have a phone at the farm, and electricity too. I'm still on well water, but it's good and clean water. I'd get you an icebox and a new stove too. The new kind, not the wood burning one I have now."

"That sounds lovely," I managed to smile.

"I hope you say yes, Cass. Do you think I could kiss you?"

"Right now?" I asked, alarmed as I looked around at everyone there.

"Sure, Cass, why not?" he asked with his grin. "There's nothing wrong with kissing, people do it all the time now, even out in places like this."

"Maybe we should wait and see," I answered, blushing as I hunched down, hoping he wasn't going to try it anyway.

"If you want," he chuckled. "It's adorable how shy and modest you are, Cass. I like that about you a lot. I really would be good to you, Cass. Your dad already said you've never had a steady fella at all, that you've never even talked about a boy. I like that you'd be coming to me as a real lady and I'd treat you like a lady. You have my word."

"I appreciate that," I breathed, feeling sick. "You think we could head back now?"

"Sure, Cass. You sure I can't have just one little kiss?"

"I'm sure Mama and Daddy are both watching us," I told him, scooting back to put my shoes on.

He laughed and stood up, just picking up his shoes to walk back barefooted.

As soon as we got back, I turned to Daddy. "I'm not feeling so well, Daddy. I think I need to go home and lay down a while."

"Are you too hot?" Mama asked quickly. "Are you getting too much sun? Martin, we need to go! She's looking peaked! Darling, go lay down in the car and we'll clean this up and get you home!"

They hurried, but on the ride back, John insisted I lay in his lap while he stroked my hair and fanned me with a newspaper. As sweet as it was, it was still absolutely miserable.

I stayed in bed the rest of the day.

The day before my birthday, I went up to the market in the morning, knowing my Punk would come in before work. I paced in the aisle and watched the door while pretending not to.

He finally came in and looked right at me. He grinned and winked, but stopped at the counter to get his drink and cigarettes. Turning at the door, he tapped his watch with a smirk.

I smiled down at the can I was holding, then put it back on the shelf before hurrying home.

At dinner, Daddy asked me what I was so happy about, smiling at my plate.

"Tomorrow's her birthday, Martin! She's going to be a woman!"

"Hmph. Age don't make a woman, our Cass has been a lady for some time now."

"But legally, she'll be an adult."

"Old enough to get married," Daddy agreed, cutting his eyes over at me.

I stared hard at my plate, my smile gone now.

I went to bed early that night and laid there imagining the next day. I would go up to the grocer first thing! Would he kiss me? Lead me back where no one could see us and steal a kiss? Ask me to go for a drive on his next day off? Take me to dinner somewhere?

Would he ask me to marry him?

Why else would he wait until I was 18? Any girl could date at 16 or 17, but he wanted me to be 18. That could only mean he wanted to get married!

Daddy would blow a gasket, but I didn't even care. I would be 18 in a few hours and he couldn't stop me! I could run away with him and after a year or two, he could show Daddy he wasn't a punk or a deviant. He was just misunderstood and a hard worker! He was my sweet Punk and I adored him.

I fell asleep dreaming about him, blissfully happy.

It was dark when I jerked awake, blinking and confused at why I'd woken up. A few seconds later, there was a tapping at my window, right above my bed.

Turning and getting up on my knees, I pulled the curtain back to look out.

It was him!

Grinning, I waved. He smirked and motioned me to open my window.

I pushed it up and he leaned close. "Hey baby, happy birthday."

"You know where I live?" I asked, astonished.

"Course I do. 12:16, baby. You're a free woman now, aren't you?"

"I am!" I agreed excitedly.

"I have a present for you," he told me, grinning.

"You do?" I asked hopefully, praying it was a ring.

"Yeah, baby, come on," he whispered, then reached in and slid his hands under my arms to pull me right out of my window.

"Oh!" I yelped in shock. I was in my nightgown! And I didn't have shoes on! "I can't be out here!" I whispered, horrified as he set me down.

"It won't take too long, baby," he promised, leading me to his truck. Picking me up, he set me in the seat then moved me over so he could slide in. "You're gonna love it," he promised as he smirked and started the truck.

"I'm in my nightgown!" I whispered worriedly, starting to panic a little.

"It's cool, baby. Like I said, it won't take long. How long's it been since you started goin' all moon-eyed at me, baby? How long before I saw you looking?"

"I... I don't know," I answered, horrified. "I just saw you one day is all. I wasn't... moon eyed."

He chuckled. "Sure you were, baby. I saw that look. I knew that look. Made me stop in my tracks right then and I knew exactly what I wanted."

"You did?"

"You know it, baby. So how long was it? A year? Two?"

"I only just saw you a couple months before that day you came into my algebra class."

"That all? The way you was lookin', I thought it was a lot longer. You were a girl flat in love."

I looked away, blushing furiously.

"Why don't you come over here closer, baby?" he asked, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me close. "That's more like it."

"How far away is it?" I asked worriedly as we left town.

"Not too far. Right up here off the highway," he promised, his thumb rubbing my shoulder. "So tell me, doll, how many times you been kissed?"

"Me?!? Never! I've never been kissed... I was asked to kiss someone but I didn't do it."

"That so," he chuckled. "You're a bit of a square, ain't you, baby?"

"Daddy says I'm a lady," I told him, a little offended. "And I have The Coasters new record! And The Everly Brothers!"

He chuckled again, looking down at me with his shining brown eyes. "Well you are a rebel, aren't you?" he asked, his tone condescending. "Guessing you have Buddy Holly too? No good music collection is complete without at least one Buddy Holly record," he teased.

"Make fun all you want! Music like that is a big deal in my house!"

"I bet, with a pop like yours."

"You know my dad?"

He barked a laugh as he turned off the highway to a side road. "You know it, baby. He and I've had a few run ins. Starting with the day after I saw you at Grays. Someone went and told on me and he went to told the cops I'd put hands on you. Tried to have me arrested, then came at me with a gun when he saw me and some boys down at the lot. Told me off, said to leave his little girl alone. Then he tried to pin all kinds of shit on me, even tried to say he saw me with his own eyes. If I hadn't had 20 people all saying I was at Jimmy's Bar, he'd've had me in jail for something I didn't even know about. Your old man has it out for me, baby. You didn't know that?"