Pussy Challenge

I loved kissing my wife's pussy, but she rarely let me, and that was my complaint. She was convinced it was dirty and nasty. Only reluctantly she showered and cleaned it to surgical standard. Mostly I was permitted a fleeting peck, though on the few occasions I had done more she had seemed to like it, though there was no big O. Usually after 4 or 5 minutes she would push me away and tell me to get on with it -- in other words, fucking. Twice I had been allowed to put my mouth on it when she had merely cleaned it. When I thoughtlessly kissed her afterwards she was entirely disgusted and told me to scrub my face and clean my teeth to remove the poison. Something to do with pheromones, I suppose, maybe attractive to men and lesbians but repulsive to women like her.

I had been trying for years to get better access, but with no success. I read complaints from women that their men would not do oral sex, but here was I so eager and so denied. In vain I told her that I liked the smell (wrong word to use, it turned out, resulting in increased use of deodorants) and the taste had been fine.

"I could lick your pussy ten times a day!" I said, and she made a face.

"No you couldn't. You'd soon give up." I insisted and for some reason she came up with what we later called the Pussy Challenge. She had always been rather competitive, and it seems I had made a bet. What I should have remembered is that she sometimes cheats.

"Ten times a day? Prove it!" She thought for a moment. "I guess it would not be fair on work days, so let's say five times a day during the week, and ten times on the weekend. Starting and finishing midnight Monday.

"Easy," I said.

"OK, but I can't clean it properly each time. You will just have to take what comes, but don't kiss me afterwards. Let's say you have to complete ten minutes each time. A quick peck will not count. That's nearly an hour a day and two at the weekend!"

"I tell you what," she continued after a moment, "to make it easy, I will present myself to you five times a day when it is convenient during the week. If you survive, which I don't think you will, you can schedule the weekend."

"Oh, and when you fail, I get to go on a shopping spree."

"What do I get if I succeed?"

"You will have licked a lot of pussy, and made your point. Isn't that what you want?"

She paused and added "Now for some reason I am feeling rather horny, so let your cock do its work!"

Afterwards she went through her usual routine to make sure that no trace of male or female discharge was left.

MONDAY

Just before midnight on Sunday she showered and went through her hygienic routine, presenting herself just after midnight. I put my mouth on her and she started a kitchen timer. It was all very inviting and I licked enthusiastically, feeling all the way from just below her cunt, up over the peehole and over the clit and the hood. I started well but I was getting a bit tired when I felt a bit of plumpness in her vulva, so glanced at the clock: 6 minutes. My neck was aching when the timer went and she said "Well done for Monday, four more to go!"[1]

It was four o'clock in the morning when my open snoring mouth was suddenly covered by a hairy snatch. "Mmph! It's four o'clock in the morning!" I wittily observed.

"Giving up already?"

"No, no! Start the timer!"

Oxygen was my main problem, but I managed to struggle my nose clear and was soon appreciating her. My neck did not ache from this position, and I passed the ten-minute mark.[2]

I wondered if she would offer me something in the morning, but instead we got up in the usual rush.

I was home first. When she came home, she took off her coat and instead of changing, she dragged me upstairs, took off her skirt, tights and knickers, and presented herself.

Now the thing with tights, is they do tend to make the groin sweaty. So my face came down to sweat-drenched hair and a complex female slit which had a certain bouquet (as they say with wine) of female musk, ripe sweat and just a hint of piss. I started to lick with my nose in her pubic mound, getting a generous dose of pheromone for my trouble.

She would have been utterly disgusted and probably expected me to be, but I had my secret weapon: I was a male. It was a bit strong at first, but soon I had licked it down to a more subtle taste. Something like a dry white wine with the floral undertones of female secretions and the top note of whatever was coming through my nose. Three down, two to go.[3]

She went and cleaned up for her own comfort and changed. When dinner had digested, she presented herself on the bed again. She was not surgically scrubbed, so it was now a very pleasant slightly fruity taste and the smell of a woman, as I worked my way round trying to please her. She was definitely excited when the timer went, but my arms and neck were aching, as I probably did not have the best position. Her face was red and I detected some disappointment. A very successful number four.[4]

We got ready for bed, and she squatted down looking towards my toes, so that my nose was practically in her arsehole. Of course, it was quite clean. Still, there was a faint smell of something like rubber, which was not entirely appetising, which I expect came from some anal glands. It was a more difficult place to lick from, but I passed the ten-minute mark and the end of Monday's Challenge.[5]

TUESDAY

In the middle of the night I heard her peeing and washing her hands. Without a word she came and sat on my face. Not only had she not cleaned herself, I expect she had wiped the pee around so that all her bush was soaking. After while I had licked the area between her outer lips clean, but was still getting the benefit of pissy hair on my face. To be honest, it was not that pleasant, but it got better as I licked away the piss, and I felt some female juice coming down as she must have been getting excited. I wondered if we were going to be plunged into some piss fetish and did not like the idea. Afterwards I drank some water, washed my face and cleaned my teeth as she wiped herself with a flannel.[1]

After breakfast she had obviously cleaned herself, and I did a good job on her pussy if I say so myself. She did not normally go to work in such a good mood.[2]

That evening it was the sweaty knickers [3] and after dinner a wiped cunt, smelling and tasting of woman: not very strong but very nice.[4]

After we had digested she started flirting, then unzipped me and gave me a bit of a suck. I had been pretty aroused anyway, so off we went to bed to make love. (At least I hope that's how she interpreted my enthusiastic fuck.) I deposited a good load and you (unlike me) will immediately guess what happened next. She grabbed her pussy, pushed me onto my back and immediately squatted over my face to give me my own sperms back.

Now I had often contemplated eating a cream pie. It always seemed a good idea until I actually came when it immediately seemed a very bad one, so I had never gone for it. If you've never tried it, the taste is a bit odd, but what gets you is the sliminess and the fact that the spunk slides around in a sauce of cunt juice, so slips oddly in your mouth. She probably thought I would turn away, but I managed to hold in place and swallow and lick her till the timer went. Five out of five![5]

I have read (on the internet, so it must be true) that male animals lick out the sperm of a rival but not their own. Thus men are slightly repelled by what they have just discharged, but are eager to lick out that of another man, and some encourage their wives to get sperm for this purpose. I hoped I was not going find this out this as part of the challenge!

WEDNESDAY

It was five o'clock in the morning when I got what began to be a familiar wake-up call. I later realised that not all of the spunk had escaped and some had managed to mature to a more intense flavour, though not really slimy. It was combined with some hours of female secretion to give a somewhat acrid flavour. In principle, I would say it was nasty (and I am sure she would have hated it) but actually I quite liked it.[1]

After the ten-minute bell, she went for a pee. I heard her flushing and washing as I began to doze off. Suddenly a pissy pussy was thrust in my face.

"Mmph! Hey this is cheating -- another one straight away? And my tongue is tired!"

"Want to give up?" she asked sweetly. So I started to lick and she started the clock. I struggled but managed. I now have a glass of water beside my bed at night.[2]

After work I was ready for the sweaty knickers, but she went straight for a shower before demanding my service. However, she did not do extreme cleaning so there was a little bit of woman smell and taste.[3]

There were two more clean but not too clean pussies (which I think we both enjoyed) before midnight and another day was done.[4] [5]

THURSDAY

A lick before an early breakfast [1] and another afterwards, allowing time to get to work as usual.[2] Both very pleasantly loaded with pheromones. My technique had improved so that I could now manage ten minutes without getting asphyxiated or crippled, and she was obviously enjoying what I was doing. Perhaps she was now more cooperative, and I could look forward to daily licking in future.

In the evening she came home and wiped herself with a flannel, but did not shower. This gave me a pussy with a bit of flavour: just about the right amount to be both sexy and easy to lick.[3]

After dinner, she showered and came down with a sexy night dress to invite me to bed, where she opened her legs and pushed my head down. I did not stop when the bell went, but carried on for a while until I could resist no longer, and plunged in with my cock.[4] While I was fucking, I began to think how good it was going to be when I licked her afterwards. When I came it immediately seemed a bad idea of course, but I wasn't going to lose the challenge at this stage. She surprised me by popping in a tampon before starting the clock, so there were very few deserters from the sperm army that I had to clear up. I thought this was rather considerate.[5]

FRIDAY

At 6 a.m. I was presented with my next challenge. I believe she had a friend who was a wicked witch and had taught her this spell. The trapped sperms had matured in a way that would delight a French cheese connoisseur. The slightly acrid taste I had experienced before, but fuller and riper, with the battle survivors swimming in a thin fluid. It was strong, but not so bad, while being bad at the same time, sort of. I did my ten minutes.[1]

She went and had a piss to provide me with a sort of fusion sauce on a bed of hair. Very modern cuisine. Fortunately, practice had made me physically stronger and psychologically more resilient so the task was accomplished.[2]

Home from work: the sweaty knickers. Easy![3] Later, the wiped cunt.[4] After an hour another the same.[5] Five days of getting my five a day!

"Right," she said. "The clock starts at midnight. It is up to you to set the schedule. I will not try to stop you in any way. I will have a shower and clean up now, and await your instructions. Have you got a plan?"

What a silly question! Of course I didn't have a plan. Then I had an idea. We were using a kitchen timer for duration. I would use another one, and just do the job every 2.4 hours. Brilliant, if I say so myself. I got the other timer and set it for 2.40.

SUNDAY

The first licking was completed at 12.20.[1] I set the timer and went to sleep. It rang and I completed another one, and set the timer.[2] I was feeling pleased with myself after the fourth licking until I looked at the clock, which was well after 9, when I was expecting it to be about 7.30. Of course. 2.40 means 2 hours 40 minutes which is 2.67 hours, and I had not allowed for the licking and cleaning times so it was just about every three hours.[3] [4] Maths was never my strong point.

"Don't forget we have to do the shopping, and you promised your mother we would visit her this afternoon," said my better half. "I hope these are all included in your plan."

The shopping took till well after 12. It was more than an hour's drive to my mother's and we were supposed to be there for lunch. An apologetic phone call, one lick and we drove off.[5]

Mum was really glad to see us and had a lot to say. I managed to communicate a strategy.

"I just want to check a few things in my room, Mum. I won't be long." There was a fair amount of stuff there: games and books and plenty of things that should have been thrown away.

"I'll go and make another pot of tea," said Mum.

"I just need to visit the loo for a while," said my wife, and shortly followed me upstairs.

"I'd better have a pee," she whispered to me. "I'll need one soon and it's best if she hears."

Indeed, the acoustics of the house appear to have been designed to focus the toilet sounds so that everyone can tell the difference between a male and female, and possibly some basic medical diagnosis.

"A wipe with paper will be a treat compared with some recently," I said, and she complied. Ten minutes by my watch in my bedroom then quickly downstairs.[6]

On the way back it was clear it would be later than planned when we got home, but my darling wife made a suggestion. She was helping me in the challenge now.

"Why don't we stop in that layby? You know the one which goes quite a bit back from the road round some bushes? I don't think I've ever seen anyone use it."

Brilliant. We stopped as far from the road as possible, and opened the rear passenger door away from the road. She lay with her skirt up and knickers down, one foot on the back of the front seat, one on the back headrest. My cock was rigid, but I had another task. Crouching down I checked my watch and started work. After two minutes I heard a car drive by us and it sounded like it stopped somewhere.

"It's OK," she said. "He's just stopped further down."

She was obviously getting really excited when ten minutes came up. I lifted my head and she pushed it down.

"Don't stop," she begged.

I continued and after another few minutes she orgasmed, shaking and writhing. I raised my head and looked down the layby. There was a man standing by his car about fifty yards away, and looking in our direction. When he saw me, he got in and drove away. She must have known he was watching and might walk over at any moment.[7]

"God, that was exciting," she said, adjusting her clothing. "Let's go home."

"We'll have to come here again," she added as we drove away. "And by come, I mean come!"

When we got home it was nearly eight. Three more was impossible.

"There's not enough time," I said in panic. "You can't count today because of the problems."

"You silly man!" she laughed. They don't have to be evenly spread. It could be ten times in the morning. I just bet you would get fed up if you had to repeat it so often. I expected to do it at convenient times with allowances for meals and shopping. I could hardly stop myself laughing when you planned every 2.4 hours! Just get on with it, have a rest and do it again."

Doing it that way, we easily managed three more before midnight.[8] [9] [10]

On Sunday we managed 10 licks, two orgasms and a fuck.

"Well," she said, "I lose that bet, and maybe I was wrong about needing to be so clean. Is a wipe really clean enough?"

"Definitely," I said. "But I might try a cream pie again." She kissed me.

"I'm very sorry about cheating, trying to put you off. In future you can lick me as often as you want, so long as you don't kiss me straight after. But obviously you won't want a pissy facefull in the middle of the night!"

"Well...," I said.