Radiance Ch. 97

As they stepped inside they found themselves in a briefing room, there they were presented with a sight of Adam in his power armour arguing with what must have been a Paladin about why they shouldn't be simply attacking the Valkyries and how they should maybe try talking to them.

It was obvious from the Paladin's responses and demeanour that he had no intention of listening to him and pretty soon the memory fast forwarded to the night of his patrol and how the Paladin decided to kick off an attack on the Valkyries despite it being against their main orders and Adam's protests but he still joined in because he was a good soldier who followed his orders.

"So he did fight against it, he protested the way they were treating us, there are those among their number who do not wish to attack us and wish to make peace with us," Jewel said her voice sounding so completely lost.

"Did you doubt him when he said this to you?" Zixxy asked and Jewel shrugged.

"In part yes, I felt that it might be just him trying to appeal to our sense of honour but I truly see now he meant every word he said to me, this makes me feel even worse than I already do," she said and Zixxy nodded.

"Good you deserve to," she said flatly and coldly and Jewel did not argue with her as they walked on through the memory.

They saw his capture, his imprisonment, his trial and the subsequent enslavement and Zixxy refused to refer to it as indentured servitude because slavery by whatever pretty name you call it ws no different.

They saw the promises Jewel made to him and then they saw his embarrassment and shame as he was made to strip off before the two tailors and Zixxy glared at Jewel as she listened to his inner voice out lining his feelings on the matter.

"I-I-I had no idea he felt such shame and grief over this, how could I not see this? I mean how would I have felt if I had been captured and this was done to me, of course, he would feel shamed and humiliated by being forced to do such a thing in public," she said in a voice dripping with sadness and grief.

The memory continued onwards until they came to the night of the bath, they saw his confusion, his excitement, his attraction to her, the subsequent confusion caused by this attraction, his hidden joy at making her feel such pleasure but then his shock and his fear in her change of attitude towards him, his fear of her aggression and his silent pleas for it not to go too far.

What they saw next enraged Zixxy beyond words and broke Jewel to the point of collapse into a sobbing mess as they watched her selfish and uncaring treatment of him, her ignoring his pleas, they felt his disgust, his sadness, his grief at the treasure now stolen from him, of how dirty, worthless and used he felt.

Jewel screamed at the sky in pure grief, "I never meant it to be this way!! I never meant to make him feel this way!! I wanted to feel good and I wanted to make him feel good, I wanted to take the pleasure he'd given to me and to make him revel in it, I wanted him to see me not just as his mistress but as a woman, as a powerful and proud Valkyrie woman who was powerful, fierce and in control but also as someone who would reward him, who would care for him, someone he could trust maybe even if I am one hundred per cent honest with myself even love in time, but I took his trust and I pissed on it, I ruined everything, I defiled him, desecrated him, took from him his most sacred thing and stole something I can never give back his honour," Jewel screamed.

Zixxy walked up to the sobbing woman and as she looked up she slapped her hard across the face with such force that it shocked the young Valkyrie woman as she lifted her hand to her slapped cheek.

"you have zero right to feel fucking sorry for YOURSELF! Look at what you have done, look at what you have caused, all because you let your selfishness rule you, this man was not completely innocent as he was a solider but you took the trust he was forced to place in you and your promises to him and spat on them, you did this not he, so quit feeling fucking sorry for yourself and get on your fucking feet, you swore to me that you wanted to fix this and this screaming and wailing solves fucking nothing, so get the fuck up and follow me," Zixxy said in that ice hot voice of hers again.

Obediently Jewel got to her feet and followed the little alien as she marched across the room to the newly formed door and when they opened it this time they found themselves not in the corridor but in a black room with a small circle of light in it, curled up in the centre of the circle was Adam.

"Adam!!" Jewel yelled and when to rush forwards until Zixxy grabbed her arm and despite her size, she held her fast.

"No you have not earned the right to touch him so you will not, in here you play by his rules not by yours," she said and Jewel looked once again at the light circle and that's when she realised it was crackling with electricity, it was a trap of some kind.

"Last line of defence, his mind's last way of keeping you out of his thoughts, should you cross that line uninvited you will be expelled from his mind with quite a shunt, the results would be unfortunate," Zixxy said as she approached the circle.

"Is Adam a psychic or something?" Jewel asked looking at the golden circle of light and Zixxy shook her head.

"No but the sentient mind is a powerful thing that should never be underestimated, the very fact that it has the capability to lock his conscious mind in here behind such defences to keep him alive should tell you that," she said.

"So what do I do? I have to help him," Jewel said looking at the circle.

"Oh that's simple but not easy, now we show him the truth of not only your words but your feelings and we make him believe them," she said and Jewel looked surprised.

"W-W-What fe....." she began but Zixxy held up a single hand to cut her off.

"If you lie to me just once I will pull the plug and leave you on your own, I'm a fucking psychic remember?" she said crossing her arms over her little chest and glaring up at her.

Jewel glanced at Adam's sobbing form curled into the fetal position, "How do I show him that I love him, how do I convince someone I barely know that he changed my life and made me happy in ways I can't even begin to understand myself let alone explain to him? How the hell do I tell someone I'm supposed to fucking hate with my entire being that they are the most beautiful creature that I've ever seen with my own two eyes and would do anything on this earth to take this pain that I caused him away and carry it myself for him?" Jewel asked forlornly.

Zixxy smiled slyly, "Well one you just did and two we don't we show him," she said and Jewel looked confused until she saw Zixxy pointing and when Jewel turned she found Adam standing staring at her.

"How can I ever believe you, Jewel, I trusted you and you broke your word, you betrayed me, betrayed my trust, used me, abused me, hurt me, defiled and raped me, how the hell can I ever trust you again?" Adam said staring at her with an expression that was bereft of emotion and kinda reminded Zixxy of one of those glass-eyed dolls you saw in a department store.

Jewel hung her head, "I know and I simply do not have the words to tell you how sorry I am Adam, I never meant for any of this to happen, I never meant to make you feel any of these things, to hurt you the way I did, I-I-I got so lost in the power I held over and it got so mixed up with the way Iwas feeling about you that Icouldn't stop it, what I was feeling about you scared me to my core, I'm a proud Valkyrie warrior, I-I-I'm not supposed to love a human, you are supposed to be my enemy, someone I hate, but I simply couldn't hate you, you were nothing like had been described to us or what we'd seen before, you were kind understanding of us and our plight, you were honourable and you were willing to sacrifice your own life if only it would give your brothers and sisters the chance to live, I've never seen anyone do something like that before, so how could I not look at you differently? You changed me that day, changed my view and it scared me, but then I began to look at you truly look at you and I didn't just like what I saw I loved it, your every curve, your smooth and clear skin, your pretty fur, your bright and intelligent eyes, I found myself desiring you in ways that felt both wrong and right at the same time, it felt taboo and good at the same time but it scared me but that's when I saw a way to have my seed and eat it too, the power I had over you, the control, I saw a way that I could make you give me the thing I wanted most and in so doing I could show you how I felt with my actions without having to say the words that made me fee such shame, but i didn't even do that, the power and control and lust blinded me, they drowned me and unleashed something in me that shames me in a way so strong that i couldn't even begin to put it into words, what I did to you wans't just wrong it was vile and I am so deeply sorry Adam, if you hate me I'll understand and i swear I'm going to put in a appeal on your behalf with the elders to commute your sentence as served due to undue suffering caused under my care, that way at the very least you'll be free," she said he voice sounding forlorn.

But when Jewel looked up she realised that Adam wasn't even looking at her he was looking at the world around them and that's when Jewel realised that they were not in the black room anymore, they were in memories again but these memories weren't his, they were hers!!!

Around them her voice had matched her inner monologue as she'd been speaking to Adam they'd been playing images from the last couple of days as well as what appeared to be flashes from her life of past boyfriends letting her down, betraying her trust, dumping her because of insecurity due to her strength among other things.

"Truth isn't just words, it's memories, that is pure truth, and since you said you'd do and agree to anything to help him I took the liberty of reaching into your head to fill in the gaps of your words and I showed him the truth of your words," Zixxy said.

"Adam turned to look at her now but now there wasn't a glassy expression on his face, there was life and it was confused, "Y-Y-You are in love with me?" he asked and Jewel hung her head and nodded.

"Yes Adam and I have no idea how it happened or how it happened so quickly but I am but I understand that you hate me for what I've done and nothing will ever make up for it," she said.

"There is one thing," Adam said and she looked up at him.

"What?" she asked.

"Help me stop the war, help me to show your people that we are not evil or bad, free me," he said and she cocked her head in confusion.

"How do I do that?" she asked.

"Say it loud and proud, if you truly feel this way about me then declare it, do not hide it, say it not to me but to those it will shock the most, if you truly love someone you should not hide it from the world, you should always be proud of them and the way you feel about them," he said.

"B-B-But what if they kick me out? I doubt the Brotherhood will take me in now will they?" Jewel exclaimed.

"You don't know that and neither do I, but if you truly feel the way you do you'll take that chance for me," he said.

"If they do kick you out and the brotherhood the same you will have a place among us but on one singular condition," Zixxy said drawing their attention and they turned to look at her.

"What condition?" they both asked.

"Simple if he truly forgives you, we do not have rapists in our ranks and it's a crime we never forgive, trust me when I say Seven does not forgive people like that, what you did was beyond wrong but as the wronged party Adam here has the final say on it, if he forgives you then we will not stand in his way, but he must be convinced because I will know if he is not and Seven trusts me," she said.

Jewel looked Adam right in the eye, "I'll do it, whatever it takes I'll prove myself and my love to you, I'll earn back your trust Adam if it takes me a lifetime to do it, you are not my servant or anyone else's I refuse your service because it does not belong to me, now I will stand tall and proud and I will give my heart voice I will make them hear me if I am exiled then so be it, I'd rather live free and whole than caged and broken, I love you Adam and I'm not going to stop saying it until I prove it," she said and suddenly the circle was gone.

Adam stepped forwards and suddenly Jewel felt his arms around her, "I forgive you, but never treat me like that again because if you do......." he began but it was Zixxy who finished the sentence.

"We'll kill you where you stand and trust me you'll hope it's one of us because if Seven's back he'll do it slow," she said.

Jewel just broke she began to weep and threw her arms around Adam, "Never again!! I swear it to you, Adam! I will never hurt you ever again, I will die to prove myself to you, I will earn this chance you give me I swear it on my soul," she said.

"That is a price we accept and if you don't honour it I'll be the one to collect," Zixxy said before with a snap of her fingers the three of them woke up.