Reality TV Confidential

Tyrone: Alyssa?

Alyssa: You should choose me because we haven't had any alone time together, I want to get to know you better, and I think we're really going to hit it off.

Tyrone: Julia, why should I pick you to be my guest?

Julia: I think it's about time we had a talk because I have so many things to say to you.

Tyrone: I think she already know who I'm gonna choose for tonight. It be Alyssa.

[Alyssa giggles. Tyrone takes her hand as she steps forward and leads her towards the bedroom. Back in the viewing room, Andy begins taunting Jake.]

Andy: Just think, buddy, in exactly one hour from now, just think about what they'll be doing.

Jake: I know exactly what they'll be doing. They'll be asleep. That's what they'll be doing.

Eric: Let's hope so. I am dreading where this is going. Did you remember to tell your wife about the sofa bed in Tyrone's bedroom? I expect Tyrone'll be just as disrespectful to Alyssa as he was with Andy's wife.

Jake: Dude, it takes two to tango!

Eric: I don't care how much you trust your wife; it's never a good idea to put a man and a woman who are not married in the same bed together. This whole thing is a friggin' setup to make her feel obligated to mess around with him, and that's exactly what happened last night. I hate it! This is sadistic. What did we ever do to deserve this?

In bed with Alyssa.

Alyssa: So why did you pick me?

Tyrone: 'Cause I know you the single one.

Alyssa: I am. I'm so glad you realize that. But you must not be absolutely sure since it's only the second day. We need to spend as much time together as we can. But, of course, you should choose some of the other girls to come into the bedroom with you to see how fake they are.

Tyrone: What if I catch you lyin' to me? What am I gonna do then?

Alyssa: I won't. I would never do that to you. I'm single. I would not have come in here if I was married.

Tyrone: Why not?

Alyssa: Because it's not worth damaging your marriage. If you're in a relationship, why on earth would you come in here?

Tyrone: Maybe y'all do it for eighty g's?

Alyssa: It's definitely not worth it to me. I don't understand the other girls. Julia said something that made me think that she and her husband are swingers. So they wouldn't have a problem with this. But if I was married, I definitely would.

Tyrone: So she's got someone, but she gonna be mine anyway? But you single, so you gonna let me hit it.

Alyssa: Maybe... if YOU play your cards right! So here's to us winning!

Tyrone: Here's to us gettin' that money! Ima finna smash some sweet white girl pussy!

[They clink glasses, Alyssa downs the last of her glass of champagne and snuggles up beside Tyrone. He pulls the covers up to their shoulders.]

Alyssa: Can I kiss you?

Tyrone: Hell ya.

[They start to kiss, just lightly at first and then with increasing passion.]

Tyrone: I wonder if you be more comfortable if you take that thing off?

Alyssa: This bustier? Yeah, I can take it off.

Tyrone: Yeah, be a good girl.

Alyssa: Can you help me undo it 'cause it takes forever?

Tyrone: Yo! How you get this thing off?

Alyssa: Sorry, there's a lot of hooks on the back. Just keep going!

Tyrone: Okay, last one.

Alyssa: Did you do anything intimate with Peyton?

Tyrone: Nah.

Alyssa: Promise?

Tyrone:...

Alyssa: That's a very long pause!

Tyrone: No, we didn't do nothin' too crazy.

Alyssa: You're lying to me.

Tyrone: No way.

Alyssa: You are! Did you?

Tyrone: We cuddle.

Alyssa: Cuddled... like this?

Tyrone: Oh, damn, these titties is nice.

Alyssa: So, how do you like them?

Tyrone: Mmmm... I be real with you. Peyton's got a nice handful, and I could motorboat Julia's big ass titties all day long! But you girl got by far the best titties here. I have to admit, I'm curious 'bout Naomi's incredible rack. I have to check that shit out later.

Alyssa: Whoa! Slow down there, cowboy! I think you are way too familiar with all of us!

Footage from the night-vision cameras.

The cameras couldn't pick up everything that was happening under the covers. However, the microphones were picking up female breathing that was rapidly increasing in tempo. There was a brief moment of silence, then an audible, female-sounding sigh. Then we heard Alyssa rapidly sucking in breath.

Later that night.

Alyssa: This proves I don't have a husband. I'd have to be a pretty fucked up girl to be in a relationship and do this with you.

Tyrone: Shit, I hope you don't have a husband. In the old days, they used to lynch a brother for half the shit we doin' right now.

Alyssa: That's not funny! Don't even make a joke about that!

Backstage with Denise.

After reviewing the footage, I asked Denise if she was shocked that Alyssa cheated on camera. Denise sniggered, "Are you kidding? There's something about being on television that makes otherwise ordinary sane people do the absolutely craziest, wildest things. This is nothing! We kind of expected this from Alyssa. Just wait."

Wednesday.

The morning after: Tyrone & Alyssa.

This time I was speaking in a studio apart from the rest of the set. We did this whenever my introduction included any discussion of the contestants' strategy and marital status.

In front of a white background, I began narrating to the camera:

"It's day 3 of the game, and last night Tyrone chose Alyssa to spend the night in his bedroom. As he led her away, the husband's feed was switched off.

"So, Alyssa's husband, Jake, seemed pretty relaxed that his wife was Tyrone's choice. But, after being left in the dark all night, Jake is about to watch last night's action. Will he still be so carefree after watching another man in bed with his partner?"

We cut to the guys in the viewing room who had just settled down to watch the video.

The husbands watch the video from the previous night.

The video started with Alyssa telling Tyrone that she wouldn't have come into the bedroom if she was married, and then the part when Tyrone undid the back of her bustier.

The guys were nervously grinning and casting glances over towards Jake. Their mouths dropped open for the next part of the video.

Tyrone and Alyssa were facing each other, lying on their sides, the duvet covering their chests. It looked from the shape of the covers that one of Alyssa's legs was over the side of Tyrone's body. They were moving slowly, and it was unclear whether they were dry humping or having full intercourse. However, the breathing sounds were unmistakably those of intense pleasure. Alyssa let out a tiny groan, "Aaaaaaaaahm."

The husbands' commentary while watching the video.

Jake: Nah, this isn't happening. It's not what it looks like, boys.

Eric: No, no, no! Oh, hell no. I can't handle this anymore. That son of a bitch knows full well that three of these ladies are married.

Jake: Nah, bro, they probably edit this to make it look worse than it was. We still don't know exactly what's happening under those covers. Let's get the facts before jumping to conclusions.

Eric: We know something is going on under those covers. This is not something I would tolerate from my wife.

Andy: Wait... what's she breathing like that for?

Eric: Ohhhh shit, they're definitely screwing now. It's not even my wife, and I'm ready to lose it. That woman is a lyin' cheating bitch!

Jake explodes in anger.

The cameras caught the exact moment that Jake accepted the reality of what he was seeing. His expression changed as it sunk in. What was happening onscreen was real and not an illusion.

Jake stormed out of the viewing room after the video ended, entering the open office space. He picked up a 27-inch iMac from the nearest cubicle (belonging to our intern, Arjun) and threw it across the room. Then, he continued to trash the workspace, tossing all its contents onto the floor.

At the time, I thought Jake might be in trouble with the producers. However, the producers weren't the slightest bit upset about the property damage. Instead, they were just glad that a cameraman had caught it all on tape. This scene was the kind of drama that would make the final cut.

Jake reentered the viewing room. Andy was covering his face and making nervous laughs about what happened. Eric had his arms crossed and was scowling at the blank TV screen.

The husbands discuss what happened.

Andy: Holy shit, can you believe what happened in the bedroom?!

Eric: I'm so sorry, man. You probably don't want to hear this right now, but I think you made a mistake marrying Alyssa.

Jake: Don't you two even start. Do not even go there. Fuck! This is nothing like what I thought this show would be about!

Eric: Same here! I don't know if there was an honest mixup or someone lied to us. I gathered this was an evangelical reality show. That does not appear to be the case. I thought we'd be focusing on our relationship at a couples' retreat. Instead, we've got ourselves into a sick and perverted contest for low-quality girls to whore themselves to a stranger. I'm just grateful Naomi has enough of a moral compass not to get sucked into this mess.

Jake: For real dude, you were expecting a spiritual experience? Oh shit! This is, like, the complete opposite of that! Yeah, I think you were lied to.

Eric: What exactly did you think we were getting into?

Jake: There was definitely some deceptive wording in the ad that I read. When we applied, I had the distinct impression this was an outdoorsy kind of reality show, a survival challenge for men with loving wives to join them in an adventure. I pictured Alyssa and me alone in the wilderness, making our own shelter, getting our food from the land, and navigating the backcountry. Have you ever seen the show, Mantracker? I'm really into that sort of thing.

Andy: Maybe they put out different ads. I suspected it might contain swinging, sharing, and other extramarital fun. But I thought I'd be making out with hotties on a tropical island, not stuck in here for five days with you gents.

Eric: Well.... in that case, as far as I'm concerned, you had it coming.

Private interviews about the night: Alyssa.

Alyssa: I'm worried that I went a little further than what I agreed to beforehand with Jake. Tyrone and I had sex last night because I believe the other girls won't want to push it as far as having sex with him, and once they find out that I have, they'll be forced into making that decision. So Tyrone will now be able to say to all of them, "Well, Alyssa actually had sex with me." To be honest, I really like Tyrone, and I wouldn't have been able to do the things I did last night if I didn't have an attraction towards him. So it's made me question my relationship because if I have feelings for someone else when I'm attached, maybe something is missing from my marriage.

Private interviews about the night: Jake.

Jake: I'm going to have to give Alyssa the benefit of the doubt until the show's over and I can find out the truth. However, I'm concerned that I can no longer trust my wife. I wasn't happy when I found out the show's premise, but I got over it and told her she could have a bit of fun and focus on winning the game, and I trusted her not to cross the line. Last night, she didn't even apply the brakes; she went straight to the danger zone. I'm so pissed off that I'm ready to walk out of here and fuck up the whole game. I don't care about the money anymore; this show might've just destroyed my marriage.

Private interviews about the night: Tyrone.

Tyrone: I have to say that Alyssa blew my mind last night. Jesus, she's fit, she's really fit. The kissin' was all sensual like she ain't got no hubby. But then shit got crazy, and Alyssa convince me for real that she the single one when she let me hit it raw for an hour. Yeah, ya heard right; I can last an hour and really test out her commitment to bein' single. The whole time, this bitch was enjoying herself and clearly doesn't have a man in her life. I gotta bag this blonde cutie some more this week, just to be sure.

A boozy breakfast.

It was still morning; Julia, Peyton, and Naomi were sitting around the living room sectional, drinking mimosas and peach bellinis. They were dressed casually. Peyton was wearing tight white jeans and a bright lace top, Naomi was wearing leggings and a racerback tank top, and Julia was wearing baggy grey sweatpants and a crop top.

While Alyssa and Tyrone went for another dip in the pool, single-minded Peyton seized the opportunity to get the other girls on-side.

The girls gossip.

Peyton: Do you think Alyssa is finding me a threat?

Julia: Yes!

Naomi: I think she is finding me a threat as well.

Peyton: I told you so!

Naomi: Yesterday, she didn't. But today, definitely.

Peyton: I think he would try to have sex with her. And I think Alyssa would. I think she's a slut.

Naomi: See, I know she gives off that vibe, but I don't think she would. It was like she was a different person when she was in the pool, probably due to her being blackout drunk. Her husband is watching, and I don't think she would go all the way with Tyrone.

Julia: She can't shag him if her husband is watching. You just can't do that sort of thing.

Peyton: We don't know what he's like. Maybe he likes sharing.

Naomi: I'm generally not a bitchy person, but this game is making us into gossipy old women.

Julia: I just hope to God that Tyrone is picking up on all her fuckups.

Naomi: In one sense, I thought Tyrone could see right through her, but what he says to us might not be necessarily what he says to her.

Day 3 challenge: Kissing game.

Tyrone was constantly hunting for clues about the girls' relationship status to smoke out the true single.

For the Day 3 challenge, we devised a game that would really test the girls. So, without further ado, it was time to break it to the boys. This time, instead of me as the host introducing the challenge, we would have Tyrone do it himself in a recorded clip.

We started the video in the viewing room for the husbands. Tyrone gave a toothy grin and said, "Boys, boys, boys! I gotta tell ya, I'm lovin' these ho's. Or what you call them... your wives? Now it's time for me to be stickin' my tongue down they throats! What? You mad, bro? I don't get why y'all are panicking so much about this. If it get to be too much for you to watch, you can hit that little red button in your room to make us stop. But careful now, 'cause I gon' use this challenge to figure out who the true single is."

Neither Andy nor Jake seemed particularly bothered by this challenge; after all, their wives had already kissed Tyrone multiple times. Andy chuckled, "Do your best, Tyrone!"

In contrast, Eric was livid and growled, "This is bullcrap."

Then, they cut to me on set, where I would finish explaining the challenge. The four girls were standing on the steps behind me as I spoke to the camera:

"Using a buzzer, the husbands will get to decide the length of time that their wives smooch with Tyrone. Crucially, the time that the true single spends kissing Tyrone has already been determined. For the single girl, the buzzer will sound at the same number of seconds as the length of the ideal kiss, according to a recent survey by Glamour magazine. None of the contestants know the survey results, so they'll all have to guess at the right amount of time.

"So naturally, the husbands don't want to give anything away. They will have to aim for the length of the perfect kiss and think strategically about how long they should wait before hitting the buzzer."

Tyrone approached the four ladies who were standing in a row in the main living area.

We had dressed the four female contestants in elegant evening wear for this challenge. Julia looked sophisticated in a one-shoulder midi dress, Alyssa looked tempting in a daringly short strapless flared dress, Peyton looked sexy in a ruched bodycon dress, and Naomi looked alluring in a V-neck ball gown with an exceptionally high slit.

Now Tyrone had to break it to the girls. They had already heard a partial explanation of the challenge from me. Tyrone would fill them in on the rest of the details.

The four female contestants wore increasingly skeptical expressions on their faces as Tyrone described the second challenge.

Tyrone explained:

"Ladies, it's time for what Ima call 'kissin' chicken,' and I think y'all soon understand why I call it that.

"So here's what's up. I'm gonna call each of you down here one at a time to come and give me a nice long kiss. Bein' the gentleman that I am, I let your husband decide how long we kiss. Apparently, I be kissin' the single girl for the exact time as the perfect kiss. I don't know what that is, but personally, I think the perfect kiss is like a nice big juicy kiss when her breath is fresh, and she just tastes good. Serious, though, I don't know how long the perfect kiss last, same as the rest of y'all.

"Alright, ladies, obviously, I hope this game will help me confirm who the single person is. I'm gonna be measurin' the intensity of the kiss, measurin' the passion of the kiss, and measurin' how long we kiss.

"Y'all, listen up; hate the game, not the playa. I take no pleasure [laughs] in kissin' four beautiful women in a row. I'm keepin' it professional and only doin' this to separate the single one from the married bitches.

"Oh yeah, last rule is we not allowed to stop kissin' until the buzzer go off."

Back in the viewing room, we'd put a red button for the buzzer on a table in front of the three husbands. The guys braced themselves to buzz when they wanted to stop their wives from locking lips with Tyrone.

Peyton got to pucker up first. She stepped forward, and pretty soon, she and Tyrone were kissing like crazy, almost as if their lives depended on it. His tongue slipped inside her mouth, gentle but demanding, and I have to admit it was actually quite jarring to watch a married woman deep kiss a man who was not her husband in this brightly lit room. It also occurred to me why people describe kissing as melting because every square inch of her body dissolved into his. Peyton's fingers gripped the back of Tyrone's head, pulling him closer.