Reconnecting

When we met we were young and lost, figuring things out with no sense of where we'd be in five, ten, twenty years. For me, even a year ahead was hard to picture. It wasn't that I doubted that I'd be alive, just that the future wasn't something I could imagine. Gender is a murky water to wade through, and when we met, it felt like finding the only other person in the world who felt like they were drowning while everyone else swam happily along.

But those hard, empty years passed, and even if things weren't exactly simple now, it felt as if I was moving in the right direction. I got my hormones. I was post-op at last, my top surgery scars like warm reminders of how alive I was. We'd fallen out of touch. For a while we wrote each other letters, and then they dried up as life got in the way. But as I was passing through their city one weekend, I sent the text and we met up for drinks.

Sitting and talking about our lives felt like putting on an old coat. Maybe that familiarity was how one drink kept following the last, one thing kept leading to another, and then they were leading me out of the bar and into a cab, then into their stairwell, and into their flat, and into their bed. Before I knew it, their hands were sliding under my t-shirt, their tongue hot in my mouth.

They kissed with more and better tongue than I'd ever experienced, pressing it against mine or chasing it around my mouth, sucking my bottom lip between their teeth and biting it. Everything in me was simmering, wanting them closer and closer, in my blood, under my skin. They tugged at my t-shirt and I pulled it over my head so they could run their hands across my ribs with ease.

They buried their face in the crook of my neck and pressed kisses at the crease of my shoulder, sliding a hand up over my chest, palming my flatness. They shifted above me, pressing one of their thighs in between mine, fitting into me like a puzzle piece as my hips rose to meet them. They kissed up my neck and started nibbling on my ear lobe as my breathing grew deeper, my hands exploring their waist, their hips, their back. Their body felt so broad, so strong on top of me.

"Can you feel that?" they asked, their fingers tracing patterns across my chest.

"A little bit," I said. "I like the visuals though."

"Yeah?"

They shifted again, trailing kisses down my neck and shoulders to my chest, kissing under each pec. Watching those eyes looking up at me like that made me go hot all over. They stuck out their tongue and licked a circle around each of my nipples, then meandered across my chest and lower, down to where the soft hair creeps up over my belly button.

They moved down further to the soft paunch of my stomach. I watched, biting my lip as they sucked on my skin here and there, leaving little pink marks. I reached down with one hand and unbuttoned my jeans from the side. Taking my hint, they pulled my zipper down and shifted them down my hips as I arched my back to help them.

They slipped off my jeans and underwear in one go and pushed them aside, pushing their hands under my thighs to spread my legs. My stomach flipped in anticipation, but they kept me waiting, running their tongue along the crease between my thighs and hips, making me twitch. I let out a little muffled whimper, but they looked up at me with a smirk in their eyes. Their tongue ran down to my thighs, swirling around the soft, sensitive insides.

"Please," I whispered.

Obligingly they pressed a final kiss on each thigh and pushed their tongue unhurriedly between my folds, feeling at last how wet they'd gotten me, tasting me for the first time. They flattened their tongue and dragged it slowly up my slit, the tip of it just touching my dick, and I gasped. They sucked it into their mouth and my gasp turned into a low moan.

I was already hard, and now I was harder. Sealing their lips around me, they sucked my dick like it was sweet, flicking their tongue back and forth over me in a steady rhythm that got my hips rolling in no time. It felt so good, so intense, all my feeling concentrated between my legs, beneath their mouth.

"Can I put my hand in your hair?" I asked, needing something to hold onto.

"Mhm," they hummed against me, spreading warmth through my abdomen.

I pushed my fingers into their curls, pressing against their scalp, feeling them moving up and down on me. They felt me respond to the vibrations from the sound they made, and started doing it again, making "mm, mhm" sounds against me. My back arched, and my heavy breathing got louder and louder, fingers twisted in their hair.

They pulled away, lying their head on my thigh for a moment, and I quickly missed the feeling of their mouth on me. They ran their fingers up and down me, testing my wetness.

"Do you want me inside you?"

"Mhmm," I was beyond asking clearly, just needing to be brought over the edge.

"How many?" They asked, easing one finger inside me, and watching me take it so intently I blushed. "Two?" A second finger joined the first, and I whimpered. "Two."

They sucked me back into their mouth and fucked their fingers in and out of me. Their eyes opened and looked up at me, flushed and squirming on the pillow, and that was enough. I came quickly and sharply, clenching around their fingers, my dick throbbing between their lips. They pressed a few more kisses onto my thighs before pushing themselves back up to lie beside me.

I cupped their jaw in my hand and kissed them desperately, tasting myself on their lips. I ran my thumb through the fine hairs on their chin -- new beard. They grabbed at my waist, pulling me closer to them, kissing me back deeply. When we came up for air at last, they grinned at me.

"You taste good," they said. I blushed.

"You have nice eyes," I replied, unbuttoning the silky, patterned shirt they were wearing, sliding my hand inside over their black sports bra.

"Are you going to get all romantic on me?"

"I might."

I pushed my hand down their body, unfastening their trousers and sliding them down their legs. They kicked them off and wriggled out of their shirt. I caught their elbow in my hand and kissed a line from their neck, down their bicep, and draped their arm around my shoulder. My fingers slipped underneath the waistband of their boxers. I found them hot and wet, and my fingers skimmed their dick, which was bigger than I was expecting.

"Oh, wow," I breathed, half envious and half aroused.

They pushed their face against my chest as I traced circles around their dick, getting a feel for it between my fingers. It was big enough that I could hold it between my finger and thumb, and when I did that, their hips jerked. I wondered if that was how they touched themself when they were alone, and the thought made me blush again.

"Sensitive?" I whispered. They answered with a whimper, muffled against my skin.

I pinched their dick and jerked it up and down, up and down, slowly at first. As their breath grew hotter against my neck, I moved faster. They wound their leg over my thighs, curving their body against mine as my fingers pinched and rubbed their length. I held them close to me, stroking the back of their neck with my other hand. When their hips started moving against me as if they were fucking into my fingers, I knew they were close, and let them bring themself off. My hand and their hips moved frantically and suddenly they froze, their body going rigid.

"Ohh fuck, fuck, oh fuck," they moaned, their thighs shaking as they came.

I held their dick between my fingers, holding them through it. At last they relaxed into me again. I moved my hand from between their legs to wrap around their waist, holding them softly. We lay entangled like that for a long time. I felt their breath and their heartbeat slow. It was so good to feel their skin on mine, warm and soft and smelling of allspice and mint.

After a while they rolled back to look at me from a little distance, smiling, their eyes soft and sleepy.

"Did you drift off there?" I asked.

"Just a little," they said. They tugged their duvet up over us and pushed their arm underneath my head. I nestled against them. "You will stay tonight, won't you?"

"Yes, of course," I said, already feeling myself drifting to sleep. "Much cheaper than a taxi back to the hotel."

"Oi," they kicked me playfully, and I chuckled. "I've missed you."

"I missed you too," I replied.

They pressed a kiss against my forehead and settled into the pillow. I rolled over, feeling them drape their arm around my waist, gentle and present. I dreamed that we were in the sea, their hair blooming in the waves, our bodies moving against each other, across each other, through each other, like water.