by BBB771
Hello, Anonymous. I'm not sure why you thought that English isn't my first language. I'm an American. I've never had a reader say that about me. Every reader that's ever commented on my writing understands my English. I try to mimic certain authors' writing styles, and it's actually similar to two that I'm familiar with.
As far as my sex scenes, I do not wish to write every single movement or pelvic thrust my characters do. I want my readers to visualize the scenes in their own minds, as the reader looks at it from his/her own prejudices, experiences, and so forth. Also, I try to limit my chapters from 4 to 6 pages in length.
As far as getting an editor, I don't want to hire one right now for this site. I've read other writers' works on here, and I've found their own grammatical mistakes. So, I don't see what the big deal in that area is. Although, I am learning to be an editor part time outside of my normal Creative Writing studies. In doing so, it is difficult, and editing is a continual learning process. I'll get better at my writing with each sentence I write. In the words of Stephen King, "...try to please some of your readers some of the time."
The errors of grammar, punctuation and hte awkward sentence construction makes me think that English is not your first language? If I were you I'd ask for the help of an editor. Besides the technical problems, the sex scenes are rushed and confusing.
"His dick returned back to the hulking giant "
I'm a woman who cares not about dick size, but does anyone on the planet think a 5-incher is a "hulking giant"? That's on the small side of average.