Shirley's Dilemma

"Shirley! Shirley, what the fuck is this? What the fuck did you do?"

Adrenaline raced through her entire being, and the shockwaves hit her like a brick. Second thoughts and doubts raced through her brain.

"Come up here and get this thing offa me. Now!"

Violence is not in Bud's nature, she thought, but a shudder of fear ran through her. "Did I do the right thing? Is this ultimately going to work? Was I crazy to even try this?"

"Come on down," she called up to him, "Let's talk. Coffee's ready."

"Talk? You come up here and unlock this fuckin' thing. If I come down there, I'll..."

"Come down. Coffee's made. Let's talk about Maria Melo."

Silence.

He was caught, and he knew it. His anger abated, but did not completely leave him. He picked up his cell phone and let the boss know he would work from home today. He would need time to work out his current situation. His wife had gone off the reservation and done something unthinkable. But he knew why and knew he would have to resolve it before he could be freed of his current conundrum.

Bud was finding it difficult to move around. His new genital hardware made it hard to walk, and he had to pee.

"Shirley, come up here and take this thing off. I gotta pee and I can't with this on. C'mon."

"You gotta piss," she said, "do what I do, take a seat, and let it go. Don't you dare get it all over my bathroom. You ain't the first to have to pee with one of those things on. And you better get used to it. Now go pee and then get your ass down here."

Naked, but for his new cage, he limped to the bathroom and sat on the commode. His bladder gave him no alternative after a long night but to let fly. The hole at the tip of the cage gave plenty of access to pee and he did so with a minimum of splash as he held the cage down into the toilet. "So this is how women pee," he thought. "This shit ain't for me."

While he was in the bathroom, she ran upstairs and grabbed his cell phone.

"Shirley! Get in here and bring that fuckin' key!"

"Sorry, stud, but I don't have the key. It's locked away far from here. You come downstairs and let's talk and see where that leads."

He lifted himself, shaking, from the toilet. He wrapped himself in his robe and limped to the stairs and down - slowly.

Shirley preceded him as he descended the stairs. She took comfort in the fact that he was not moving too quickly, but she was prepared to bolt should he get aggressive. She laid out the coffee cup filled with the black coffee he preferred. He did not sit, but took the cup in hand as he approached the kitchen table. Shirley kept the table between them as she spoke, having slipped his cell phone into her bag.

"So, stud, looks like you've been doing some catting around of late. Anything you want to tell me?"

"It's not what you think," he said. "Really, it's not. I've got a problem."

"Oh, you have more than one problem, my man, you've got a shitload of 'em."

"I can explain..."

"Go ahead, I'm all ears."

"First, the key?"

"Ha - no chance. You ain't gonna see that key for some time. Whatcha got a hot date?"

"No, but I've got to work."

"Bull-Shit! You have an entire inventory of harlots awaiting your caged cock. But none of them have the key."

"If that's the way you feel, why don't you just kick me out?"

"Is that what you want? It ain't necessarily gonna get you unlocked. You're stuck, my man, and I do mean MY man. I love you and want you, and I just don't want to share you. I'm not letting you go so quick. You better believe if I can't have you, well..."

"You can have me anytime. Set me free and I'll show you. Please, I'll be straight with you."

"Oh, you won't be straight for some time. You do so at your own peril. And pain."

"Shirl?"

"Nope. Tell me about Maria Melo. And how wonderful Chicago was. And don't forget, I know more than you think I know. Be, as you say,... straight."

"She's just someone I know through work."

"Ooh, sauce for the goose," she thought, "Plan C may just give way to a whole new plan - Plan D - blackmail," Maybe she could get him to cage up willingly if she could blackmail him into it.

"I have a few demands," she said, "the first being to cut it off with Maria. I'll be nice and let you do it rather than do it for you."

"Done," he said, "now take it off."

"Not so fast. There's lots more to go. First thing is you are going to wear that thing for a while, no matter what you do. I want you to wear it until you get used to it. You might practice today. Get yourself dressed, practice walking, maybe even take a ride to see if you can drive with it on. I'd really like to see how you look in clothes with it on. But not now. I'm going out and will be back later. Enjoy your coffee and practicing your new lifestyle."

"But..."

Before he could move, she picked up her car keys and handbag and out the door she went. He did not follow.

She had his cell phone, so he could not call her or, for that matter, anyone else. He was stuck at home and without a landline; he had no way out, unless he dressed himself and left the house. No easy feat for a man newly bound at the groin finding himself limping around the house trying to figure out how to free himself from his new found bondage.

Trying to free himself only made it worse. Pushing and pulling and trying everything from a paper clip to pick the lock to lube to a shoehorn to pry his balls out of the device. Everything just hurt. His lack of lock picking skills kept him from pushing it too far lest he ruin the lock, making it impossible for even the key to affect release. Because the lock was a fairly heavy duty padlock and because of its position, wire cutters or bolt cutters were not an option. The ring around his cock and balls was quite thick and was not amenable to being cut without potentially doing some damage to the sensitive skin surrounding it. He was stuck, and he knew it. The only way out was through Shirley, or a locksmith, which was out of the question. His ego and fear of being exposed would not allow that.

Bud finished his coffee and limped back up the stairs. He worked up a good sweat, trying to free himself from the cage, and was considering taking a shower. Maybe that would help - if he could do it. Maybe some cold water and a good soaping up would do the trick. But it didn't. It only left him clean with a wet crotch, making it awkward to dress until he could dry the genital area with a hair dryer. This only furthered his discomfort as the dryer heated the cage as he blew the area dry.

Shirley got her second cup of coffee from Starbucks. Bud's phone was blowing up with texts from Maria. She could not unlock the phone without Bud but could have answered a call, but not the texts, and she chose not to. If she could answer the texts, she could have made it interesting, but answering a call would let the cat out of the bag and she was not ready for this yet. She would confront Maria and the others in her own time and in her own way. If she could just figure out what that was.

9.

The phone rings at Mary's house and it's Shirley. "Gotta see ya, Mare. Gotta talk."

"The baby is napping, and the big one's playing in the backyard." Mary said, "Come over now if you can. It sounds important."

"Oh, it's important alright. I don't... I'll be right over."

By the time Shirley made it to her sister Mary's house, the three-year-old was down for her nap and the baby was up and feeding. Much better conditions for talking than when the call came.

"I'd dump his ass, Shirl," Mary said after hearing what she had heard about Bud's philandering, "Once a cheater, always a cheater. You can stay here if you don't want to go right home while he is there."

"I have to confront him, Mare. I left him alone, naked, all caged up and without his cell phone. When I left him, he could barely walk and God knows if he was able to dress himself or if he could drive. And I don't want him to lose his job if he gets a text or call from the office."

"Kick the son of a bitch to the curb, Shirl. You'll be better off."

"But I love him. I want him in my life and in my bed. And I have one other issue - a big one."

"Bigger than your husband going around fucking other women?"

"Yeah, Mare, I'm pregnant."

"Pregnant! How the fuck did that happen?"

"As the mother of two, you darn well know how it happens."

"I thought you were on the pill."

"Nah. I'm fightin' the clock and we have been talking about a family for months now. I figured within a year we'd be ready."

"Some nurse you turned out to be. You know how fertile our family can be. I wasn't off the pill for two months before I got knocked up with Jilly. I say keep him locked up and make him your bitch. At least until you start to show and are obviously pregnant. And see your doctor. Do you want me to hold on to the key for you?"

"No, I have other plans for it. I am definitely not letting him out for a week or more, so it's going into a safe deposit box for now. He'll never get it there and he will never even know where it is. God, I've gotta get home. He may be tearing the house apart looking for it, and I have no way of getting hold of him and he has no way of getting hold of me. Not unless he dresses and leaves the house. Someone is trying to reach him on the phone and I just won't pick it up and I can't answer the texts. I've gotta go. I am going to open up that safe deposit box and drop the keys inside. Then I'm gonna go home and confront him. By then he should be pretty calm... if not down right compliant."

"What if he gets rough, Shirl? How do you deal with that?"

"I'm not worried. He knows Billy would beat the shit out of him if he put a hand on me. Our big brother takes his position in the family seriously and he is no joke to mess with."

"True," Mary said. "I've pulled the Billy card on Al once or twice and it backed him right down."

"Well, good luck at the bank and mostly good luck with Bud. It appears you have thought this out and I'm here if you need me. Are you gonna talk to Bill about this?"

"Not right now, but I think I may have him sign as a second key holder on my safe deposit box just to make sure I'm backed up."

"Not me?" Mary asked.

"Nah, I don't want you in the middle of this. Let Billy take the heat if need be. He's better equipped and more inclined to be confrontational if the need arises."

With that, Shirley was off to the bank and home, stopping at the drugstore afterwards for a second home pregnancy test. Just to confirm the previous night's positive result.

10.

When she arrived home, Shirley found Bud, still in his robe, walking stiffly around the house, trying to get used to his new condition. His limp had turned into a slow walk, but he still found himself reluctant to dress.

"Come on, Shirl, unlock me and give me my damned phone back."

"Sorry, dude, no can do. The key is in a safe place where nobody can get at it, least of all you. And it's miles from here. Give me the code to your phone and I will open it up for you once I check your messages. It has been blowing up and I am sure both work and your girlfriend are trying to contact you. You give a little and I will give a little."

"Why, I oughta..."

"You oughta what? You know you don't want me to have a conversation about this with my brother, Billy. If he hears what I have found out, he will not take too kindly to what you are pulling on his baby sister. The code, Bud?"

"4-5-3-6"

And the phone opened right up. Out the door, Shirley sped and into the car. He tried to run after her, but got as far as the door and no further. She just needed to put some distance between them to collect texts and listen to voicemails before turning the phone over to him.

Six blocks from the house, she found a parking spot and opened the phone again. Four texts from his "girlfriend" and a couple from work. And two voicemails from work, which she opened and listened to. They were harmless, but the texts got progressively more desperate.

Call me when you can. Read the first.

Call me. Read the second.

Call me now. Read the third.

And Where the fuck are you? Call me, read the fourth and final text from about thirty minutes ago.

She texted back, Can't talk today. Trouble on the home front. And she said nothing else.

Shirley turned the car around and headed home. When she pulled the car into the driveway, there was Bud, at the door, dressed. Other than the slightly larger and a bit more protruding bulge, the cage was undetectable to the unknowing eye. Shirley smiled at her handywork.

With his phone in hand, held behind her back, she walked right up to him and put her arm around his waist and pulled him toward her. The hardened steel against her pelvis, she whispered into his ear, "Want your phone?"

"Aghh, please don't do that now. Please let me go and unlock this fucking thing."

She pushed herself away from him and threw his phone at him. Lucky for him, he caught it after a slight juggling act.

"I can't close my legs and I can hardly walk. Pleeease."

"You managed to get yourself dressed, I see. And you seem to be getting around just fine. I'll bet you will even be able to go to work tomorrow."

"No chance. I'm calling out again once I collect my messages from that phone."

"By the way, I've already collected the messages from work and deleted them, and if you want to know what they say, there is a little something I'm going to need from you, and I'm gonna need it right now. You're gonna call that girlfriend of yours and set up a date. I want to be present for the call and I want to hear both sides of it. Oh, and I want to know how you talk to each other. I want to know everything."

A scowl crossed her face as she moved closer to him and, with her face in his, she said, "Oh, and one more thing, stud. I'm gonna have your baby. So take that into consideration."

"What, you're... absolutely sure?"

"Go ahead. Call your girlfriend and DO NOT TELL HER I AM PREGNANT. Here's what I want. She is to meet you at the Inn of the Dove on the first night of my next four day shift. Tell her you will have it all arranged, and all she has to do is show up and get the key and let herself in. You will follow later. Tell her to draw a bath in the hot tub and be ready for a night of passion. That's it. Do it and I will tell you what the two messages from work said. They were important, so don't fuck it up."

And he didn't. He called Maria and romanced her. Right in front of Shirley, who could have killed him on the spot if she didn't want this plan to happen. The plot was laid.

"Maria, hi, sweetheart."

"Sweetheart," she said with an acid tone, "where the fuck have you been all day?"

"Sorry, I'm stuck at home and Shirley is around, so I can't talk long. Let me make this up to you. Meet me at the Inn of the Dove tomorrow night and we'll make this right. Be sexy and so will I."

"Well, when you put it like that... I'll be there."

"Just get the key and let yourself in and run the tub. It will be reserved under my name. I'll be in right after."

"Okay, lover. See you then."

Shirley did, indeed, have important news from the office which Bud attended to immediately upon finding out. And took tomorrow off. But so did Shirley. Because tomorrow night was the first night of her next four nights of work, Maria would be lulled into a false sense of security.

Shirley then called the Inn of the Dove and made reservations for Bud and his paramour prepaid and planned out. But Bud would not be coming alone. She hadn't really decided whether he would be coming at all. The confrontation with Maria would have to be stinging and have a long-lasting effect, with an element of betrayal.

But first, the pregnancy test. Time to pee on a stick. She had missed her period and felt nauseas in the past many days and considered that to be the first sign affirming fertilization. Puking her guts up sealed the deal in her mind. The test from the other day was positive, but she wanted to be absolutely sure and, after a couple of hours, the stick showing two lines confirmed it for certain.

Before she could even leave the bathroom, Bud was at the door. She pushed the stick into his face and said, "There. Someone is going to be a father. Will he be a good one or a bad one? Tell me, Bud. Will this baby have a kind and loving father or some lying and cheating sack of shit? What's it gonna be?"

"You know I love you, Shirl. But I have this stigma. This problem."

"Well, it looks like we found the cure now, didn't we?"

"No, Shirl. We can't let it be like this. We have to learn to trust each other."

"Oh, you can trust me. I guarantee it. But you. We are dealing with one of your girls and you still have how many waiting in the wings? There's only one solution for you, Bud, and you better get used to it. You better learn to like it 'cause I ain't lettin' you go."

11.

The trip to Cherry Hill went faster than Shirley thought it would. She winked at the counter person when she picked up the second key to room number 37 at what she said was the behest of her husband. When she unlocked the door, Maria was already in the hot tub, engulfed in bubbles and ready to greet her lover. Her smile quickly dropped when she saw who it was who showed up with a bottle of wine in one hand and something ominous in the other.

Shirley put the bottle down on the counter and grabbed up all the towels in the room, depositing them in the shower with the threat of turning it on should Maria move out of the tub. A frightened Maria didn't budge, trying her best to hide her nakedness under the quickly diminishing bubbles.

"This could go bad or it could go worse," Shirley said, brandishing an object the likes of which Maria had never seen before. "So tell me, Maria, how's it gonna go?"

"Who are you and what do you want from me?" Maria asked.

"You bitch. You don't even know my face. I'm the wife of the man you are supposed to be fucking tonight. But that's not happening. In fact, it's not happening any more if I can help it."

Shirley reached into Maria's handbag and pulled out her keys. "I'm gonna flush these down the toilet right now if you don't let the water out of that fuckin' tub. Do it now!"

Maria pulled the plug, and the water drained as she gathered the remaining bubbles around her to hide her nakedness. As she did this, the angry wife unscrewed the wine bottle and poured two glasses. Before offering her nemesis a glass, she poured in the roofie that she had acquired from one of her hospital's less savory employees.

"Let's toast to MY man, Maria. Drink up. Drink up or your keys go down the toilet!"

Reluctantly, she drank up, shaking the entire time.

Shirley pulled her phone from her purse and started taking pictures. Then she ran into the bathroom where she had thrown the towels and turned the shower on, holding out only a small washcloth. Maria was frozen in place and chilled to the bone. That's when Shirley began to film her.

"Do you know what this little item is, bitch?"

"N-n- n-no."

"It's a cattle prod, and it's made to keep cows like you in line when they try to act up. Now you're going to do everything I tell you to or you and this here prod will be having an intimate relationship. Do you understand me?"

"Y-y-y-yes."

"Excellent. Now, Maria, I want you to masturbate for me. And make it good. If you stop, I will demonstrate the stinging power of this cattle prod. In fact, just to get things started, I have put it on low and will give you a little jolt in a not too tender spot."

Shirley stepped over to where Maria sat, shivering in the hot tub, and placed the two prongs of the cattle prod on the woman's shoulder. She pushed the button and Maria jumped, almost leaping out of the half filled tub.