All Comments on 'Slut-Making Soda: Becoming His'

Good on you for putting a story up. I know how hard writing can be. But three paragraphs in, 3 mistakes. Writing is rewriting, editing, rewriting, and ruthlessly editing again. As an example, a 5000 page report in 48 ish hours? Professional authors can't do that. A proofreading or 3 would have caught that. When I read, if i have to edit as i go along, I stop reading. The more you write, the better your writing will become. Now go read the stuff I've published and tell me where I screwed the pooch and we will be square.

I can appreciate the Fidget inspiration; they do great work. All of the direct references, though... they were rough. I mean, "Slut-Making Soda"? "Hey [super nice and considerate boyfriend] what's your ideal SLUT?" There is worse writing out there, but you also made things overly simplistic, with a bee-line through two fetishes.

It would have been really fun if she'd accidentally imprinted on Lenny, especially if he also gets what he deserves by the end. Maybe a redux?

Yeah, I'm happy with how the first story panned out overall, but I do agree I should differentiate more in the future. As this was my first story I stuck to what I knew I enjoyed in fidgets writings and didn't want to stray too far from it to see what I could and couldn't do. Moving forward you can expect me to improve not only on my editing, but also on my pacing. As pointed out, I did dash through some content I could have explored further. I appreciate the input and am always looking for more ways to improve on my writing in the future! My next piece I'm working on is a bit of a steer from this to something totally original and more thought/planned out :)