Smoking Addiction in Seven Lessons

She flipped through a few pages and came toLesson Five: Erotic Smoking. She began reading.When I first masturbated after lighting a cigarette...

Clarissa accepted defeat as she shot up from her chair, picked up the key and opened a medium sized cedar box on the top of the desk. She pulled out an opened pack of Benson and Hedges DeLuxe Ultra Lights Menthol and a lighter, both of which had been locked up for two months. She quickly plucked out one of the all-white 100 cigarettes and lit it freehanded, drawing hard to make the tip glow brightly. She picked up the ashtray, dumped its coins and keys on the desk, and walked back to her chair, starting her second puff as she simultaneously exhaled the first through her nose. After being smoke-free for two months, the tingling sensation she felt in her chest was as good as the first cigarette she ever smoked at 16, the major difference being that at age 39, she knew how to master the gag reflex. Unlike her first time, she could inhale that luscious smoke without coughing. She continued to skim Karen's report by skipping ahead a few pages.

Lesson Six: Domination. I had no idea that smoking could convey so much power over another individual in certain relationships. I realized this when I ordered my sister's boyfriend to suck my cunt.

Clarissa closed the binder. She was shaking uncontrollably. Rationality told her that she shouldn't be reading this...this...pornography from a student. Her teaching career would be ended if an administrator ever found out. And yet she couldn't deny to herself (since, after all, she was a psychologist) that she found what she was reading to be erotically arousing. She was, in short, getting turned on by it. What she had in her hand was better than any sex novel she had read because it wasn't fiction; it was real. She decided to keep reading.

The butterflies had now turned to vultures' wings. Inhaling so much smoke after being smoke-free for two months was making her feel a bit tipsy. Even her panties felt moist. She didn't just want to know what happened next in Karen's journey to becoming a smoker; she wanted to experience it as close as she could. She moved her hand down into her loose fitting pants, whispering "you've been such a naughty girl, Karen." She began moving her fingers in a circular motion around the outer lips of her vagina as she kept reading.

I invited Ryan over to my house under the pretense that we would make preparations for attending the Prom together, but in fact my sole intention was to make him a smoker.

Clarissa tapped her cigarette over the ashtray and put it back in her mouth to puff freehanded on it continuously as she inserted her fingers into her vagina and began massaging her clit.

You can imagine my surprise as Ryan was inhaling the smoke I blew into his mouth without the slightest cough.

She moved her fingers more vigorously.

Then we began to kiss, and he continued to beg for more smoke.

"Oh, my," she whimpered as something began to build between her legs.

When Ryan ejaculated all over my black shirt...

"Oh,Christ," Clarissa moaned in ecstasy as her pussy popped and wave after wave of erotic pleasure moved through her body. "Oh, yes," she moaned with a puff and an exhale through her nose. "Yes, yes, yes!"Ohhhh, such a wonderful feeling. How she loved a good earth shaking orgasm.

She reached over to the ashtray and put the cigarette out. She closed her eyes imagining what Karen must have felt when she saw that stream of cum squirting out of Ryan's dick. When she opened her eyes again, she finished the sentence which had triggered her orgasm.

...I realized that not only was he a smoker, but that in finding this out, my interest to experience a wide variety of sexual desires through the power of the smoke was heightened beyond limits that I could control. Indeed, I became truly addicted much earlier than I had anticipated or even realized at the time. And it was an addiction not just to smoking; but also to erotic smoking.

Clarissa found this riveting, and she was absolutely glued to the text. She turned a few pages forward and came toLesson Seven: Chain Smoking. She smiled. "One of my favorite activities," she whispered as she pulled out 4 cigarettes and put them all on the table. She lit the first and continued reading with rapt attention.

PART 25 - SECRETS FROM THE PAST

"How exactly are you going to make a presentation about becoming a smoker when smoking is prohibited on campus?" Christine asked.

It was an unusually hot Thursday afternoon for the season at Rosie's. Some sat in chairs which the owner of the establishment had set up for the sun worshipers, while others huddled under the shade of the table umbrellas available. Karen and her small group were part of the latter, and the smoke from their cigarettes hung thickly under the small canopy until a gust of wind would push it out.

"I haven't figured that out yet," Karen admitted. She took a thoughtful puff on her Virginia Slims. "I suppose I could just show pictures of me smoking."

"That'll work," Christine said, "if you want to give all the guys in the room a boner."

Greg and Karen both laughed, but Ryan didn't find it particularly funny. "Don't worry, my love," Karen cooed into his ear. "The only boner that matters to me is the one in your pants." She gave him a smoky kiss, and he reciprocated.

Turned on by what they were watching, Greg and Christine began to engage in their own smoky tongue swirling.

"You wanna come over for dinner?" Karen asked Ryan.

"I dunno," Ryan responded worriedly. "I don't think your Mom likes me."

"No, no," she said quickly, "I forgot to tell you. My Mom's mood on Monday was due to man trouble. The guy she was dating moved to Chicago."

"Oh, that sucks. But I'm sure she can find someone else in this town. You don't mind if I say she's a beautiful woman, do you?"

"Well, it is a bit creepy to hear my boyfriend say that about my Mom, but I'll let it pass." She took a puff while giving him a sly look. "The problem is," she said softly to him, "my Mom isn't really looking for aman to date."

Ryan looked at her quizzically for a moment, and then suddenly understood. "Ohhhh, I see."

"Uh-huh," Karen said as she tapped some ash off of her 120, not really wanting to be open about her Mom's sexuality while others might be listening in.

"Hey Greg," Christine suddenly said to her beau mid-kiss, "this heat is killing me. 'Could you get me an ice cream?"

When Greg left the table, Christine said, "Forgive me for eavesdropping, but why don't you set your Mom up with Ms. Knowles?"

Karen and Ryan both looked at her with a blank expression.

Christine pulled out a fresh 120 from her pack of Misty. "You do know she's a lesbo, don't you?"

Ryan and Karen looked at each other in shock. "No shit?" Karen said.

"I know a lot of guys who are going to be disappointed to hear that," Ryan murmured with the wag of his head as he brought his Marlboro up to his lips.

"How do you know this?" Karen asked with great interest.

"Well, I probably shouldn't say this," she said looking around to make sure that no one was listening, "but my older cousin is transgender. She went to the Women's Center at the college where Ms. Knowles is a counselor." She paused to light her cigarette. She snapped back that first puff and quickly exhaled out of the side of her mouth. "And Ms. Knowles told her that she went through the same psychological conflict before coming to terms with her own homosexual identity as a teenager."

"Is she out of the closet?" Karen asked, still trying to mentally process this revelation to her.

"Well, she doesn't flaunt it. I mean,look where we live. Middle America isn't the East Coast where she's from."

Karen brought her 120 up to her lips and began puffing and inhaling rapidly, exhaling only through her nose as she took another puff.

"Oh, oh," Ryan said, recognizing the chain smoking expression on his girlfriend's face. "She's up to something."

"I think" she said between puffs, "I know how to get them together."

Ryan put his arm around her shoulder and rested his head against hers. "Just don't get expelled, okay?" he pleaded.

"Hey Nancy," she hollered to her friend who was standing under a nearby umbrella smoking a Salem.

"What's up?" she said putting her arms around Karen in a hug when she ran over.

"I need your help."

"Anything for you, girlfriend."

++++++++++++++++++++++

Clarissa Knowles walked into the house with a smile on her face. She greeted Judy and Gaga quickly, not taking the time to stroke her cats.I have a different pussy to stroke, she thought to herself mischievously. With a book bag around one arm and a plastic grocery bag around the other, she walked over to the desk and pulled out two cartons of B&H Ultra Deluxe Lights Menthols. She had already opened one pack on the way home from Mr. Chung's smoke shop and now reached inside for a cigarette which she lit with a new $20 Zippo lighter.Why bother with Dollar Store lighters, she reasoned.I'm in this for long haul now. She turned the tip of that all-white 100 red hot, puffing on it freehanded as she reached over the desk, pulled down the Quit Smoking Calendar from the wall, and ripped it into several pieces before tossing it in the waste basket with a smoky grin.

Clarissa pulled the cigarette out of her mouth to tap over an ashtray on the desk. Holding the B&H between her fingers, she walked over to her comfy chair where another ashtray now sat on a side table. She placed the 100 between her lips and reached for Karen's paper. The night before, she had read through it several times. This morning before class, she made a copy of it in the teacher's lounge and then found a quiet spot off campus in her car to read it again while masturbating. During a group activity in class for her students, she had read through it yet again and dog-eared her favorite pages with the passages that turned her on the most. She still had other papers to grade, of course, but she didn't care. She planned on spending at least the next few hours reading, masturbating, and smoking.

Karen's paper had evoked so many emotions. She hadn't felt this horny since before she quit smoking. But memories were also resurfacing; memories that she had managed to suppress for over 20 years. She turned to her favorite section in the essay, when Karen had her first blow job. She began reading:

I couldn't believe what I was about to engage in. When my sister called me over to the couch, it was as if I no longer had any freewill. I simply had to experience what she was offering. My body stood up and walked over to where she sat. I lit the cigarette in the holder, feeling the concentrated smoke flow through the stem into my mouth and soon into my lungs. I had the sensation of a superior being, a godlike figure as I told Brad to suck me faster. Ari had taught him well. He knew just how to please a woman. And when my body began convulsing uncontrollably...

Clarissa set the paper down. She didn't need to read the rest. The image was already in her mind, and she replayed it over and over on a mental loop while taking one long puff after another. How she loved the feel of a tongue between her inner lips, circling around the clit. She moved her fingers in and out of her vaginal canal, feeling the orgasm build, thinking of the one and only person who ever brought her such orgasmic joy. How she wished she could be there right now with the one person who made her feel such extraordinary pleasure that she has never forgotten it. All she needed to do was say the name to bring about the climax she so desired.

"Myung!" she shouted as her fingers clawed her pussy, followed by,"ohhhhh, yes, yes...oh God, yes." She was still for about a minute, breathing heavily as she thought about the last time they were together. Tears began to form in her eyes. She sat back into her chair and took a deep puff on her cigarette. Why did she torture herself this way?

Clarissa stood up and walked toward the desk. She opened the small cedar box which until yesterday had remained locked, and pulled out an envelope that was yellow with age. The handwritten letter inside was stained with tears from two decades before. It had been years since she read it, but she felt compelled to read it now.

My dearest Rissa. I've just discovered that I am pregnant. I must now devote my life to being a mother and a wife. Please respect my wishes that we no longer see each other, but also know that the little time we spent together are moments that I will always cherish. Love, Myung.

Clarissa put the letter back into the envelope, carefully placed it in the desk as if it were a priceless relic, and then went back to her chair...and cried.

PART 26 - MAKING A NEW FRIEND

Twenty-One Years Earlier

The tiny ballroom (if it could even be called such a thing) of the Alumni Hall was decorated with balloons and streamers for the entering freshman class. Big band music played over the loudspeakers while the college's Jazz Band took their seats getting ready to play a set of Benny Goodman and Glen Miller classics. Clarissa Knowles, dressed in slacks and a sports coat, chatted amiably with faculty, administrators, and fellow students before discreetly walking out of the hall towards the sunken courtyard outside. If this 18 year old East Coast liberal had to listen to one more conspiracy theory about President Clinton murdering his enemies in the White House, she was going to scream. She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a pack of B&H Ultra Deluxe Lights.Thank God the Midwest had not yet succumbed to the anti-smoking hysteria in Baltimore. That was one aspect of conservative Middle America she knew that she was going to love.

She put the 100 between her lips and tilted her head downward to light the tip freehanded. She puffed, opened the side of her mouth to inhale, and then puffed again as she exhaled through her nose. She looked up at the night sky and wondered why she could see so many more stars than back home in Baltimore. She looked around the courtyard at the many perennial flowers, enjoying the aroma of blossoms on this cool early fall night.

She headed down some steps into the courtyard itself and then noticed in the far corner a young Asian woman sitting on a bench with her legs crossed. A recently lit 120 cigarette between her fingers was resting on her knee. Clarissa's heart stopped momentarily as she watched this incredibly confident smoker slowly exhale a creamy cone of smoke with her head tilted upward.Holy shit. Who is this Asian vixen? Clarissa was absolutely enchanted as she walked towards the teenager and smiled. "Mind if I sit down?"

"Please," she said with a friendly grin.

"I'm Rissa," she said, stating her nickname which was only used among family and...very close friends. She extended her hand.

"Myung," the teen responded.

"Are you a student here?"

"Oh, no," the beautiful smoker replied. "My husband is."

"Oh," Clarissa said in surprise, "you're married to Ron Kwon." Clarissa tried not to laugh. Why an international student would choose such a harmonious name pairing remained a mystery. "I just met him inside," she said pointing to the Hall. She looked at her quizzically. "How come you're out here?"

Myung lifted up her cigarette and smiled.

"Gotcha," Clarissa said. "Me, too." She brought her B&H up to the center of her lips and took a full puff. "So you just arrived from Korea, right?"

"Mmmm," she nodded with a puff on that long, sexy cigarette between her lips.

Clarissa was seriously getting turned on. She wanted this woman's smoke in her body very badly. "So what do you like most about America so far?"

Myung thought for a few seconds as she pursed her lips and blew another creamy stream from her mouth. Then she smiled. "120 cigarettes," she said with a giggle.

Oh my God, I'm so in love. And she is so easy to talk to! "You speak English very well for someone who just arrived in the U.S."

"Thank you," Myung said with a nod and a grin. "My mother got me a tutor early in life. It was her dream that I move to America." There was a few seconds of silence as both women took a drag on their cigarettes. "So what are you studying, Rissa?"

Hearing Myung speak her name almost sent Clarissa into a swoon. "Well, I just arrived, too, from Baltimore. I'm a psychology major with an emphasis on Women and Queer studies."

"Queer?" Myung asked puzzled. She knew the word as meaning odd or quirky. Why would someone study such a peculiar subject?

"Homosexual," Clarissa said without a hint of embarrassment.

"Oh," Myung said with a raised eyebrow. She went back to smoking her cigarette.

Clarissa knew that she must be wondering whether this white woman who sat down next to her was queer. How would she react? Would she apologize and say she should join her husband, or would she stay and...

"That's a very interesting topic," Myung said. "I don't think there are any majors like that in Korea. Homosexuality is quite a taboo, especially for men."

Clarissa was intrigued. She didn't have to make that qualification about men. She was compelled to ask, "And how about for women?"

"They just hide it," Myung answered straight-faced but with a hint of sadness.

Was Clarissa reading too much into these comments? She felt certain that Myung was trying to tell her something that could not be openly expressed. But how to pursue the matter? She was heartened when Myung finished her cigarette but made no excuse to leave. Clarissa dropped her own spent cigarette on the ground and crushed it with her shoe.

"So with your husband getting a degree, what are your plans?"

"I don't know," Myung answered. "My family hopes that I can one day attend school here." She then looked at this white woman and in a confidential tone, adding, "I think that's why they wanted me to marry him."

Clarissa was shocked that this woman whom she had only just met was revealing so much to her. "You didn't want to marry Ron?" she asked gingerly.

"It was an arranged marriage," she replied.

"I didn't know that those were still common in Korea."

"They aren't, but I'm from a small town outside of Seoul." She reached into a small handbag to pull out her VS-120s. "When one of their friends said their son was coming to America on scholarship, they jumped at the chance to send me along as his wife." With her long, thin fingers, she delicately pulled out a 120. "Have you tried Virginia Slims?"

Clarissa was so mesmerized by what Myung was telling her that at first she didn't hear the question. Then she realized that this woman was handing her the pack. "Um, no, I haven't. Are they good?" She also reached into the pack for a 120 and accepted a light from Myung.These are all very good signs, Clarissa thought to herself.

"Oh, they're the best. I honestly thought that every American woman would be smoking them," Myung said with a broad smile. She took a puff and opened her mouth wide, revealing a sphere of thick smoke that gave Clarissa butterflies in her stomach. Myung snapped it back with such force that Clarissa involuntarily gave off a soft moan of ecstasy that she assumed this Asian temptress must have heard.

"You like smoking, don't you?" Clarissa asked before taking a puff.

"No....I love smoking." She took another slow puff and beautifully guided the smoke up into her nostrils through an exquisite French inhale. Clarissa was in heaven. She also had to admit that this Virginia Slims, though much too feminine for her self-image, was quite a delicious smoke.

Just then the two women heard music coming out of Admissions Hall as a chorus of saxophones began Glen Miller'sIn the Mood. Clarissa understood that there would be dancing at this reception, and she expected to head back to her dorm room when it began. Then she noticed that Myung was tapping her feet, occasionally moving them from side to side. "I love the big band era," she said dreamily with a puff from the side of her mouth.