Someone Else's Daughter

"So, what are you thinking if you get the part?" her asked. "Will you move here?"

"I don't think so..., it's too early," she mused. "Think I could stay with you while I'm here?"

"Ah..., let's discuss that when you get the part," he smiled, thinking his latest matron may not be so thrilled with him moving another woman into the house.

"Sure Brock, sure!" Karen agreed, not letting anything bring her down from her high. After her coffee, she caught a cab to the airport for another red-eye.

~ ~ ~

KAREN WAS ON pins and needles the next few days. Kenji, Christine, and Amelia noticed her agitation. At breakfast a few days after, Kenji broached the subject.

"Hon, you seem on edge. Everything OK?" he asked her.

"Nothing really Ken, just waiting on confirmation for some projects. You know how it is," she replied, waiting to share her good news if it came.

"OK then sweetie. You let me know if there's anything I can do. Have a good day!" he wished her. Karen smiled and gave a distracted nod as Kenji kissed her on the cheek.

A few hours later, Karen got the call she was waiting for. She had gotten the part! With a hoot of triumph that brought her co-workers out of their cubicles, she did a little happy dance at her desk. Good news must travel fast because she got a call from her agent, Lauren Bright. Any other time, she would have to wait on hold or leave a message.

"Congrats Karen! The casting director just called with the details. You'll need to fly out in two months for a three-week stint in some backwater in BC," she announced. "Great job!"

"Why thanks Laura," Karen said, "I'll make the arrangements with work and my fam."

"Cool, cool, Karen," Lauren agreed, distractedly. "You know, seems like you'd have more success auditioning in BC, than TO. Ever think about moving there?"

"I've got my family here Laura, and my day job," Karen explained.

"OK Karen, if you want to succeed in this business you have to take some risks. I'm sure your boss could have you do some work out there, maybe drop the family while you're making a name for yourself. You can always come back to them when you're a star. They'll appreciate it, and who doesn't like a reconciliation story? Makes you more human!" she suggested nonchalantly. "Being single just makes it easier to do what you need to do to get the parts, if you know what I mean."

Karen definitely knew what she meant. "#Metoo" meant "#metoo, if you're caught," but the practice would always survive. In fact, she'd had offers herself when she was doing the castings.

"I love my family, Laura, but I'll think about it," she offered, just to get the conversation over with.

"Alright superstar, think about it. Talk later!"

The first thing Karen did was text Brock.

[I got the part! :D]

Karen stared at the three dots [...] while Brock formulated his response. It took a while but it came through.

[congrats! knew yud get it. see u here in 2 mos.]

Karen then texted a summary of what her agent suggested, asking for some advice. She waited again for his response.

[shes not wrong u kno]

[had my share of that]

[think abt it]

Karen sighed, the idea beginning to burrow into her head. In her estimation two experienced voices from the industry couldn't be wrong. The next step would be to tell Kenji about her activities of late and arrange for time off, which she did right away.

~ ~ ~

"KEN, HAVE A minute?" Karen approached him later that night after dinner.

"Sure hon. For you? Always," he said, setting aside his paperwork.

"I got a guest role for five episodes on a TV show!" she announced.

"That's amazing sweetie! I knew you'd land something. When's it shooting?" he asked as he hugged her.

"Well, that's the thing," she said as she worried bottom lip, "It's near Vancouver, and I'd have to be there for three weeks." Kenji frowned sightly and furrowed his brow at Karen's announcement.

"I didn't know you were auditioning in BC. Is that why your business trips over there are always so long?" he asked her.

"Yes, but it's not like I'm doing anything different! I'm just auditioning there like I am here," she explained. "Anyway, it's not like you don't take long business trips either!"

"True, but it's all business for me! And then I rush home to spend time with the family," he countered.

"Well, it IS business for me. MY business, Ken! You KNEW when we married that this was my dream. I NEED this."

"Well Karen, I'm happy for you, but I'm not happy that you kept this from us. I thought we discussed major things together," Kenji shook his head. "What's done is done. I guess you'll have to go," he said as he returned to his work.

Karen felt a mixture of anger, guilt, and frustration. This should have been a triumph for her. She couldn't understand why her husband couldn't be more supportive. She left the room in a huff and called the one man who would know the struggle and be supportive.

~ ~ ~

TWO MONTHS LATER Karen found herself exactly where she was meant to be, doing the thing she was meant to do. Despite all the hardships that came with filming on a smaller budget in a rural setting, in hot, heavy, period costumes, Karen thrived. She called home when she was able, but schedules just wouldn't mesh. Torn between elation and guilt she sought out the one friend she had in the area.

Brock drove up from Vancouver to watch her film for a day, thankful for the time away from his latest benefactress, who was getting too clingy. He watched, feeling the jealousy pull at him at her success, believing himself more worthy. He also hoped that he would be able to play on her constant need for attention to bed her. Brock wasn't the best actor, but he was a master manipulator.

Brock played the sympathetic ear, always understanding her point of view. He questioned why her husband wasn't more supportive, how her family didn't understand her passion for acting, and how success required sacrifices. Slowly, he was creating an "us against them" mentality, the "creatives" against the "normals", and Karen bought into the belonging.

Brock waved at Karen, who smiled at him and walked over to leaned into him. "Hi Brock," she said in a low voice, her lips near his ear. Mainly to keep the set quiet, but it also let her to feel naughty. "I'm glad you could make it."

"Happy to be here," he said to her, giving her a grin. "How about we go for a walk, y'know, to let them film in peace." They both took a stroll over to craft services and grabbed coffees and walked around an empty area of the makeshift mining town.

"Thanks again for coming up Brock. I really am glad you made it up," Karen repeated. "It's been so hard, you know? Leving on not the best terms, and I feel guilty not being around for my kids."

"Why should you feel guilty Karen? Isn't it your husband's turn to support what you want to do?" he prompted her, continuing his subtle, but constant tearing down of her husband.

"Well..., but Ken, he is usually supportive, and he's almost always with the kids when he's not working...," she responded uncomfortable, guilty that her defense of her husband wasn't firmer. "But you're right. It's my time now," she declared, sucking in a deep breath and squaring her shoulders.

After Karen finished off the day of filming, they ended up seated at a table in the town's only pub. After a few drinks Brock broached the topic that he had been laying the groundwork for over the last two months. "You remember what your agent mentioned a few months ago?"

"There was a lot of things she was throwing at me. Which one?"

"The thing about dedication to your career," he started, circling his main point. "She had a point, y'know?"

"I guess she did," Karen agreed, reluctantly. "But why so drastic?"

"It's not as drastic as you think," he began his pitch, knowing a lot of it was probably bullshit. "Being single helps the fantasy that you're available. And it gives you the time and freedom to focus on auditions," he continued. "What's more, it'll let you move to Vancouver, where you've had better luck. You think your husband would move his family out for that?"

"I don't think he would. He wouldn't be able to make the same kind of living. He's been with his company for so long..."

"So, you see, you have to cut ties and focus on you!" Brock declared; arms wide open.

"But my kids...,"

"Your kids have a father," Brock cut her off. "A father who can support them. And I hate to break it to you. You're not getting younger. They'll be able to smell 'mommy' on you from a mile away and all you'll ever get cast as is a supporting soccer mom. Do you want that?"

"Well..., no. Not really," Karen continued, swaying to his way of thinking once again. Then Brock went in for the kill.

"And think about it. Because of the way things work here in Canada, you'll get half of everything AND alimony, so you don't have to worry about working while you pursue your dream!" Dollar signs danced in his head as he said it, hoping to at last latch on to a younger sugar momma.

"I'm gonna have to sit with this Brock," Karen murmured, deep in thought. "Maybe you should head back. I've got some thinking to do."

"OK Karen. But don't think too long. Your window is closing," Brock warned as he stood up and kissed her cheek. Karen sat at the table a while longer in thought, only realizing she was stuck with the bill when she went to leave.

~ ~ ~

KAREN FINISHED FILMING a few days later and she headed back to Vancouver a few hours before her flight. She made sure to give herself enough time to grab a quick lunch with Brock before checking in.

"So, did you think about what our last chat?' he asked.

"I did...," she started slowly. "But it's so drastic! Why a divorce? We could just live separately," she tried to provide an alternative.

"You could, but in that case, he could cut you off. This way, you get half of everything while you're establishing yourself. And if it doesn't work out, you could always go back. He'll always take you back," Brock said, giving her an out. "You said he wasn't the most supportive of your career. And that he has such a nobody personality that he would never say no to getting back with you." Karen winced at Brock's characterization of her husband and their relationship.

"He had been supportive," she began to defend her husband "but, this time he wasn't very happy about how he found out..."

"What happens when you get more parts here? Or if you become more successful and have to spend more time away? What then?"

"There's no guarantee of that. I guess we'll just have to see. I gotta go Brock. I have to check in," Karen said, making her excuses as she stood and kissed Brock on the cheek, dropped fifty on the table, and left to find a taxi.

Brock smirked, knowing he was getting to her. He settled the bill with her fifty and took all the change.

~ ~ ~

ONE WEEK AFTER Karen had returned, she operated in a bit of a haze. Elated at her first real professional acting job, but also preoccupied by what could come next. Her family noticed that she wasn't quite herself, and Kenji broached the subject a few times. "I'm fine, Ken. Just decompressing and coming back to reality," would be her standard response, followed by a tiny sigh, a smile that didn't reach her eyes, and a small shake of her head.

"Alright Karen. Let me know if there's anything I can do," would be his standard response. Kenji figured she would let him know if there was anything he could do to help. In the ensuing weeks, things returned to a semblance of normal at the Suzumura house.

Two months after getting back from BC, Karen got a call in the middle of her day. It was her agent, and she was excited.

"Karen, Karen! I just got a call from the show. They want you to be a recurring guest! That means at least half the episodes!" Laura explained. Her agency wasn't a large one, dealing in catalogue models, extras, and local advertising, so having an actress recurring on a television series was a big deal. "They want you back in BC in two months' time! This time for at least four months. Think about it, you could even become a regular next season!"

Karen's head was spinning. She was extremely excited, but all her anxieties returned. "That's great news, Laura! When do I need to let them know?" she asked tentatively.

"Sweetheart! What a question to ask! You let them know now! And you let the know yes!"

"But I've got to tell Ken, and let Janet know...," Karen began her excuses.

"Listen Karen, shots like this don't come often. I'll deal with Janet. I'm sure she'll be thrilled to have a real, live, professional TV actress working for her. And I'll send you the name of my divorce attorney. He handled my last two," Laura explained. "Remember what I said about your career and being single...," Laura let that hang for a second. "Let me know by tomorrow. I'll let Janet know."

~ ~ ~

THE DAY AFTER, Karen sat in the offices of Jacob Arthur, one of the preeminent divorce lawyers in Toronto, with the fees to match. She was nervous, fidgeting with the clasp of her designer clutch while she waited for her appointment.

"Mrs. Fischer-Suzumura?" a well put together lady, about Karen's age, inquired as she looked straight at her. Karen stood. "I'm Mr. Arthur's assistant, would you follow me, please?" she indicated that Karen should follow her into a conference room where Jacob was waiting.

"Mrs. Fischer-Suzumura! Very glad to meet you," he greeted as he shook her hand. "Please, have a seat. So, Mrs. Fischer-Suzumura..."

"Please, call me Karen, my last name is a mouthful," she offered, smiling nervously.

"OK then. Would you mind if Amanda sat in with us to take notes?" he asked. Karen nodded her agreement. "Alright then Karen. Ms. Bright gave us a brief rundown of the situation. What is it you would like for us to help you with?"

"Well...," Karen began "I haven't really had a chance to think it through. I'm pretty sure I would like to start divorce proceedings..."

"Karen, if I may say so, you sound a bit unsure. Far be it from me to turn business away, but divorce is a very serious thing. It's not something easily undone," Jacob warned. "There are those that marry and divorce often, and there are those that are just not happy in their marriages, and then there are those that want to move on with someone else. Why do you want to do this?"

"It's... I've been... It's like this. I'm an actress, or at least I want to be. I've been married for about nine years now, but I guess it's just been convenient," Karen continued, now on a roll. "Yes, my life isn't hard, and my family isn't bad. My husband pretty much lets me do my thing, supports me and our children financially, and we share childcare duties pretty evenly..." Karen trailed off when a small amount of guilt crept in as she fibbed about taking care of the children. Between Kenji and their nanny, Karen really hadn't had to shoulder much of the hard work.

"And you find this unsatisfactory somehow?" Jacob prompted.

"It's not unsatisfactory, per se, it's just that it doesn't suit what I'm trying to achieve with my life now," she explained, elaborating about her career goals and a providing a description of what Laura and Brock had suggested how her life should be. "... and that's why I think divorcing my husband is the best option."

"Well, it's not the best reason I've heard, but it's not the worse. And at least it's honest," Jacob admitted. "So what would you want out of this?"

"A friend had told me that I'd get half and alimony, so that's what I would need."

"OK then, I have a few questions," Jacob began. "Do you have a pre-nuptial agreement?"

"Yes."

"And do you have children?"

"One of my own, and one with Kenji," Karen replied.

"Next question, and be honest with yourself, do you want custody?" he asked. Karen then hesitated.

"I... well...," she waffled. "I know I'm supposed to say yes..."

"No judgement here Karen. We're looking to give you the best outcome possible for you."

"OK then, it would be convenient if I don't get custody," she admitted, a weight suddenly coming off her shoulders. "This is gonna sound awful but, my daughter was unplanned and I was a very young mother, so I didn't get to experience life the way it's usually supposed to go," she explained. "And having my son was just something that I thought I needed to do," she continued. "Being married means you should have kids, right?" she looked for reactions in the room, but both Jacob and Amanda's faces were neutral. "Don't get me wrong, I love them both, I just don't know if I could be a full-time mom, y'know?"

"And what's your timeline like, Karen?" Jacob asked.

"As soon as possible. I'm planning to relocate to BC and focus on my career in a few months, and with as little cost as possible."

"Alright, well then. Let's start the paperwork, and we'll have to get a copy of the prenup. Just so you know, you will have to go through a separation period of a year before the divorce is final, but we use that time to work through the details of custody and division of property," Jacob explained. "But for all intents and purposes, you will have terminated your relationship with your husband."

~ ~ ~

IT TOOK A few weeks for the paperwork to be finalized. The first Saturday following, Karen arranged a playdate for both Christine and Bradley. Amelia usually had the weekends off. Karen woke early and brewed some coffee, preparing herself for the confrontation to come. She had asked Kenji not to book any golf today since she had something she wanted to discuss with him.

"Morning sweetie! Do I smell coffee?" he asked as he came down to the kitchen.

"Yeah, Ken. Why don't you sit down? I'll get you a cup," she offered with a smile. Kenji sat down as she brought him a steaming cup of coffee. Karen sat back down and cupped her mug as she stared at a space to her left.

"Ken, I've got something I need to tell you," she said quietly, almost like she was ashamed.

"Sure hon. You know you can tell me anything," Ken offered after a sip of his coffee.

"It's... ah... I don't know how to say this...," Karen began haltingly, turning to stare at a space on the table between them.

"What is it, Karen?" Kenji asked, worried now that bad news was coming from the tone of Karen's voice and her body language. Karen took a deep breath, pulled her shoulders back and looked Kenji in the eye.

"I've filed for a divorce Ken," Karen told her husband.

Ken's shoulder's slumped as he felt the blood drain from his face. His heart sank down to his stomach and he felt the tingle of pins and needles begin around his mouth. He struggled with getting the words out through his pursed lips as he felt them tremble.

"What about the kids?" he asked.

"Ken, I'm not taking the kids away. I just need to move on with my own life. I have so much I want to do," Karen explained.

"Couldn't you do that and keep our family together?" Karen shook her head at his question.

"I wish I could Ken, I really do, but this whole family thing wasn't something I wanted for a while. My daughter's gonna be a teenager in a couple of years, Ken! I've got to do what I want to do with my life before it's too late!" she tried making him understand.

"So, what's the last nine years been about then Karen? You suffering through something you didn't want? Did you even love the kids? Our life? Me?" Ken asked. Karen looked down at her hands for a moment, silent. She looked back up at Ken with tears in her eyes, knowing what she was going to say would hurt him.

"I've grown to care deeply for you Ken, but I don't think I was ever in love with you. It was just comfortable, y'know...," Karen went silent again, tears now flowing freely. "And I do love our kids, it's just..., I don't love being a mom, the responsibility, the baggage..., and you're so good with it that I thought..., if I left most of it to you and Amelia, that I would feel different, but I was wrong."