by rubberbiscuit
Some good advice on writing I've read.
"Stand up and read your story out loud to yourself."
When you get to the points that make absolutely NO SENSE that's the place to start fixing. The starting convo on the couch is such a place. That's where I stopped skimming and started ignoring. 1*
The author did a very poor job on this story. It seems the author has some gay issues mixed with some cuckold issues that were transported to this bad story.
This story lacks of creativity, nonsense, shallow, low context, poor written and it is not even hot nor sexy story.
This story is not enjoyable and it is such waste of time reading all they way through.
Just a question: If she was there why the need to tell her what happened? 1*
Was sweet and sexy, sounds like a good night for everyone. Good job