All Comments on 'Team Building Ch. 04'

Can a leopard change her spots!

3

I just find it unbelievable that anyone would pay that money for a whore.

What a lovif shit

What a lot of shit

Take your share of the money and boot her cheating whore ass to the curb. She has more miles on that pussy than Goodyear! I wouldn't give a fuck about the money, I'd smack her in the face so hard, she would need a team of plastic surgeons to put it back together. She is a selfish, cheating, WHORE! I wouldn't take her back after a week of whoring, much less a year. She has been exposed to every STD in the world. LOL, I'd even wash my hands after talking to her on the phone. There is NO EXCUSE that she could give that if I were Hubby, I would never touch her again. It would be healthier to swim in the sewer! taking it upon herself to leave for a whole year, to fuck a thousand other men as a whore? She has NO Respect for hubby at all. I would probably disappear. Who wants the filthy lucre? NOT ME! Nor The Filthy whore! Great Writing, Great Story, Great Effort! 5 stars. Thanks, Buster2U

Nasty people. Both of them. One day when the kid has a medical issue and finds out the husband is not his father, the truth will come out and he won’t want anything to do with these skanky people.

Great Writing, Great Heart Rendering Story of a Complete Whore and Slut. 10 stars for Great Story and Effort. This woman is all out for herself, she gives her pussy out like candy in a parade. She has no remorse, No love for hubby, or her child who was a result of her cheating. This woman has NO feelings for anyone but herself. She gave up her marriage to become an even bigger whore. I would have sold the house or burnt the house down and left the child and moved to Argentina or someplace where she would never find me again. Sluts like this are Rotten sluts to their core. All she cares about is herself, or she could NEVER have let herself be such a big whore. Hertbreaking Story really. Even when Myself and my first wife "Karen the topless dancer" were swingers, I would have NEVER permitted her going anyway, with another guy. Much less for a year. I wouldn't care how much money she made, fuck her, she could keep it, and fuck herself into oblivion as far as I would be concerned. LOL Very good Writing, Very heart breaking premise. 10 big blazing stars. Thks, Buster2U

Interesting conundrum, but there are holes. Jerry wouldn’t leave empty handed. Without a strong prenup her earnings would be a 50/50 split. Already caring for Jarod by himself for a year, he’d have a good case for primary custody. She’d have to pay child support and earns enough to pay a substantial ex-spousal support. @Buster2you is on point!

This wasn't my kind of story. Divorce the bitch and take half. Sue the company for rape and their 'business' practices. Overall, Jerry needed to walk away from this selfish whore.

Not just no, but HELL no.

My brain does not compute being so broken as a person that you CHOOSE to raise another man's child after your wife betrays you and get's pregnant cheating on you. Intellectually I know there are people this broken out there but..... DAMN. How do you live THAT life with the full knowledge that your wife never loved you enough to not betray you in the worst way possible.

As for the writing, it felt extremely rushed with no room to breath for any of the choices being made. Nothing explored about the choices, just a laundry list of extremely ignorant choices that a couple of selfish materialistic people made so they could claim they were happy being independently wealthy. Sure.

isn't prostitution illegal where they live

Whore's come in all sizes and shapes. Money is the greatest purveyor of prostitution no matter the initial cause or end result. If more men had DNA tests then more truths would come out in the wash.

What a shitty end! After one year, when she returned she would find husband and child gone for ever!

Beyond unbelievable — no one would stay with her, after the no discussion departure for a year. He should have taken the son, sold off everything and just disappeared without any contact with her. BTB

Yeah, still no thanks, but happy trails to you lady

Once a whore always a whore!!! I personally love slutty wives that fuck for profit. Wish your life well.

This is a joke. No man with any balls would accept this fucked up bullshit. In the year the cunt whore was away the house and everything in it would be sold and the he would take all the money and live in the lap of luxury fucking any and all young women of every nation, Asian women are apparently very accommodating. The husband would disappear and never have contact again with the cunt whore and her bastard kid. She would die of every horrible nasty sexual infection there is.

stupid, really. Buy a variety of escorts. Cheaper and you get variety.

Also in a divorce he gets at least 50% and he can probably get custody of the bastard child if he wants.

It is difficult to relate, if in a fantasy story, to something so unrealistic.

This marriage seems to work for both of them…. He has adjusted to being single and rich. Doesn’t fit my morals but they like it so whatever. I doubt that they can remain faithful but neither one cares. On another note story was progressively well written but severely rushed zt the ending,

Just a dumb story, i hope you enjoyed writing that! Choppy, brief, giving no real insight into people's emotions, and no real drama to speak of,

At least it was short. There, I said something positive about it!

Written fairly well regarding composition issues, but the plot development is merely a sketch--a barebones recital of "I did this, he did that"--totally devoid of any emotion. I fail to see any basis to build a reasonable expectation that the marriage relationship is sufficient to sustain what amounts to a whore/pimp relationship rather than a marriage (from ANY structural standpoint).

But writing is not easy, so thanks for sharing your creativity, and keep writing.

MLJ

Sorry not my cup of tea!

Whore......period.

The deal for the once a month whoring was bad enough, but setting up the year gig without "chatting" with her husband is BS.

I agree with the person below......wait until the year was over......take his share and have her hit the road.

Very poor ending, no closer at all. Obviously no real love in the marriage just one for money she was and will always be just an expensive whore and he was no cuck as he couldn’t care less what she did as long as he wasn’t embarrassed and he got access to the money.

Fucking bullshit

What a fucked up bunch!

How gross.

I liked what you did and glad hubby actually got some to

For the love of money is the root of all evil.

Susan and Jerry loved money so much they compromised every shred of integrity they had. They became the poster couple for evil. They obviously understood what they did was evil, but they didn't fight against it. Susan didn't have to take personal deals offered by James or Paul's. As corrupt as it was, Susan already had a deal. Susan could have taken her money and initiated a massive lawsuit against her company. She had to have accumulated some kind of evidence on her behalf, at least she had the opportunity to try and gather some.

Susan loved doing what she did. She loved being a whore, playing the harlot. She loved getting rich for laying on her back with her legs in the air. She cared more for money than for her loss of a years time spent with her husband and son whom she professed to love. She loved money more. If Susan was on fire I wouldn't waste my piss to put her out. May sound judgemental, but at some point society will have to say stop all this bullsh!t, we can't handle anymore madness.

Yeah, the 'realness' index on this is extremely low. The outrageous conspiracy carried out by Susan's company to compromise not only her but her husband Jerry as well. The fact they were plying them with drug laced alcohol. The fact they separated them and moved Susan to another location which is kidnapping. The fact they performed non-consensual sex acts on them at the least but were more consistent with outright rape at the most. That Susan and Jerry were coerced into agreeing to 'the deal'.

Supposedly Susan and Jerry were a relatively straight laced couple before they were Shanghaid into whoring. But would Susan really change so much that she would agree to a deal with James to spend four exclusive weekends with him during a year? That would increase her days away from Jerry by around 20%. From 12 weeks or 60 days a year, to 72 days a year. Who wants their wife to spend the equivalent of over two months a year fu*king other men?

But the most unbelievable thing Susan did was her unilateral decision to abandon her husband and her son for an entire year. And for what? Feed orphans in South America? No. To knowingly, literally, become Paul's sex slave with the understanding that she would be used by him and by his friends and by his clients. Usually for painful sex on her part and for an entire year. Unbelievable.

I hope that lash2718r opens this up for treatment by other writers. There is so much B.S.'ery and ass whupping that needs to be done that no one writer can handle it all.

one of the lamest stories I have read

Even for fantasy, this sucks.

I would have handed her the chastity belt and said "this is now part of your work uniform. Until I'm caught up, I keep the key.

If your work and your other lovers don't like that, maybe they shouldn't have abused the privilege and convinced you to abandon me and your son for a year.

Oh, and I don't think our son - and I'm cutting you slack here - should be alone, so I'll likely breed you at my convenience until we have the kind of family I want. So factor that into your thinking.

Liked the ending. Very acceptable outcome

Cuck and whore retire rich on bitch’s earnings.

So far out of bounds to be utterly ridiculous. She disappears for a year with no explanation, fucks thousands of guys and he just takes her back. Not on this planet.

Since one of you asked, anyone is free to sequel any of my stories.

Endings, short and pointless, the story lacks an element you as a writer seem to miss in every story your write and that's depth, it's all wishy washy skimming across multiple points in a supposed area you have chosen that is to write.

To me it's almost like a child learning to write his or her first essay, but never understanding the words used or how they make a good read, yours needs a lot of work. If you must continue to wrote then contact some of the better writers on site that hit 5 stars almost every story they produce.

If you wrote a book I would buy it and use it like 'SPARE' and stick it under the wonky table leg it's all it's about useful for

Still a whore and he’s a cuckhold.

You have a rather base and utilitarian viewpoint toward marriage. Your choice. The couple in this story have a marriage license, but they have no Marriage. They have a business arrangement, where it appears the female business partner is the rain maker, and fuck buddy when available and convenient. So what's the male partner's role in this business venture? He gets all the pussy he can handle (apparently limited), all the money he can spend, lots of time raising and enjoying his son, and he doesn't owe his female business partner a damn thing. So are we supposed to feel sorry for him? Yeah, someday he might like to be married, again. And maybe he'll marry his business partner. But I can't imagine why. He's getting the milk for free, and when this cow goes dry he apparently has the moral high ground to replace her with a younger fresher cow. And he will. The wife is a rich but stupid whore. I hope someone writes that sequel.

Definitely in humor, as bad as it is.

Better, put it on the leaflet for pills to empty the stomach. It works!

Captcha

I like a good unreal story, you know something that just can’t happen, but this was toooooo much

You missed the boat at every turn with this drivel. Plenty of sex with no details, plenty of anxiety and distress with no details. Your characters are one dimensional they land as flat as the page they are written on.

Jerry has no self-respect, and his wife is just disgusting. After dropping off their son at college, Jerry should just keep on going and leave her on the side of the road. He could do a lot with all their money he would have cashed in.