Tempting Trevor Pt. 04

"I've been thinking about... about girls." she said, and hung her head, hiding her blushing face with her hair.

Trevor was silent for a moment, then said, "What about girls?"

She mumbled something that he couldn't hear.

"What?" he asked again, as kindly as he could muster.

"About... doing things with girls." she stammered.

"Like, intimate things?" He asked, carefully, his heart hammering in his chest, mouth dry.

She nodded, and said, "When I think about it, I don't feel afraid, like I do when I think about boys. Not just you, but boys in general."

"What are you saying, exactly?"

She was quiet and began to sniffle. She wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand.

"I don't know what I'm saying. I... we just... we've always been able to talk about things that I couldn't talk to other people about, and it's one of the reasons I really do love you. You remember when I told you that Jamie Williams tickled me so hard in the locker room that I peed myself?"

He chuckled, half-heartedly, if only to try to lighten the mood.

"It's like that. I would never tell anyone that kind of thing, because it's too embarrassing. I can tell you, though. You're not like other people. You don't ever judge me. You're important to me, and I don't ever want to lose you, so I thought that I should tell you."

"Thank you." he said. "I just... I'm still not sure I understand, or what you want me to do."

"I don't either. I just know that doing things, intimate things, is important in a relationship, and doing those kinds of things with you is really hard for me. It's scary, and I don't know if I'm ready for it. I don't know if I'll ever be ready for it. But, I know that you need it, and I don't know what to do!"

Her voice rose to a high pitch at the end, and she finally broke down into fitful sobs. Trevor held her, and wiped at her tears with his shirt, not sure what he was supposed to say. She loved him, but she didn't want to have sex with him? Sex made her afraid? Was she breaking up with him?

"Are you breaking up with me?" he finally asked.

"What?" She asked, looking up at him through tear-streaked eyes. "No. I don't think so. I don't want to. I just don't know what to do!"

She collected her purse, and stood up, crying again.

"I'm sorry." She sputtered. "I'm so sorry. This was stupid. I can't... "

Overcome, she quickly left the house before Trevor could even process the fact that she was leaving. What the fuck had just happened? He paced back and forth across the living room, phone in hand, dialing. It rang, and rang, with no answer. He tried 3 more times with the same result. Finally, he climbed the stairs to his room and lay down, defeated. What the hell was he going to do?

Chapter 16: Sex Therapist

The feel of warm arms wrapping around his body roused Trevor from his fitful nap. He cracked an eye and wondered where he was for a moment. He'd been dreaming about something. He couldn't remember. His eyes hurt. Everything hurt. It felt nice to be held. Shaking off the sleep fog he rolled over and saw Stacy laying in bed with him. She wasn't naked, and she looked tired.

"Hey you." She said, with none of her usual pep.

"Hey."

"I heard from Mary." She said.

"Really?."

"Yeah."

"What did she say?" He asked.

"It was kind of hard to tell. There was a lot of crying. I think I got the gist of it. She's afraid of sex, like I told you before."

He shrugged and replied, "And she's into girls"

"Yeah, there is that." She said, "I wasn't really surprised, though."

"What do you mean?"

"In college, you meet a lot of girls that are like Mary. They're out of the shelter of their parents' influence, and they're not sure who they really are, now that they can make their own choices."

They lay in silence a while, eyes closed, while Stacy held him.

"You really are a sweetheart." Stacy finally said. "I know this is hard, but we're going to figure it out."

"What do I do?" He asked.

She pondered the question, then suggested, "Why don't you let me talk to her? You know, girl talk. Dicks and clothes, and all that. Let me figure her out."

Trevor considered it. What other choice was there? He certainly had no idea what to do. He didn't want to break up with her, but if they were just going to be good friends, what was the point of a relationship at all? It was all so new and confusing.

"Thanks." He said, nodding, "You ok?" He asked. "You look tired."

"Long night." She said, and felt him shiver.

"You went to church?" He asked, to get his mind off of his sorrow.

Stacy laughed and said, "Yeah. I just figured with all the sinning I do that I might yet find redemption."

He smiled weakly.

"I'm kidding. The whole man in the sky thing's not really for me. I just thought it would be nice for mom and dad."

The couple of hours spent after church in a hotel room, being relentlessly pounded by her father, had also been good for mom and dad, she thought.

"You know what I do, when I feel like shit?" Stacy asked.

"Masturbate?" He said, and she punched his arm.

"Well, that goes without saying, fuckhead. No! Retail therapy."

"Shopping?"

"It's a proven method for dealing with depression. Why do you think Americans are such gross consumers? We're all depressed as fuck, so we just buy shit constantly to keep the endorphins pumping."

"Yeah. Ok." He consented.

"Maybe wash your face first." Stacy said. "You have boogers and eye crusties."

She kissed his forehead and flounced out of the room. A few minutes later, face washed, he made his way downstairs, where his mother was on the couch with her laptop.

"Hey, mom." He said.

"Hey, honey. You ok?" she asked, a look of concern on her face. Had Stacy told her about Mary?

"Yeah." He said, without admitting anything. "Just a tough day with Mary."

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked.

He shook his head.

"No. It'll blow over. Stacy and I are going shopping for a while."

She nodded and said, "have fun."

A moment later, Stacy appeared, wearing a tube top and a little skirt that ended well above the knees. Trevor couldn't help the lusty stare he gave her and, consequently, did not notice the same look on his mother's face.

"Ready?" She asked him.

He nodded. Stacy gave their mom a light kiss on the head and they left.

"I think I know what will make you feel better." Stacy said, as they walked into the mall.

"What?"

"I'll let you pick out something really sexy for me to wear for our next lesson. What do you say?"

Trevor looked at her and blinked.

"Next lesson?" He asked.

"Unless this thing with Mary means you're going to be celebate for the rest of your life, you still do have the chance to get into her pants. She's afraid and confused. That doesn't mean she's suddenly a lesbian."

"I... I guess so."

"You've got a lot of patience, Trev. Even if your future isn't with Mary, she's not the only girl around. Any one of my friends would throw themselves at you in a heartbeat!"

Trevor had been so preoccupied with his own despair that he hadn't even considered that. Stacy was right. Sure, it hurt right now, just because he was so confused, but what if it wasn't the end of the world? It just kind of felt like it.

"Ok." He agreed, suddenly hard. Apparently, penises were not so prone to sadness as brains.

Stacy led him to Frederick's once more, where he felt completely out of his depth amongst all the different kinds of sexy clothes.

"Anything you want." Stacy said.

He wandered about, trying to imagine Stacy's body encased in the variety of skimpy things. What did he like? He had no idea. He spotted a set of black, lacy thongs and push-up bra, with a sheer gown. In his mind, he saw Stacy wearing it, her already large breasts pushed up on display invitingly, while she knelt between his legs and jerked him off.

"I like that one." He said, his cheeks flushed.

Stacy appraised it, and grinned. "Nice choice."

She rifled through the sets, found her size, and took it to the dressing room. Trevor waited. A few moments later, she came back out with the set in her hand.

"Perfect." She said, and leaned in closer to whisper, "You're going to cum so hard when you see it. I swear to God, this thing is dangerous."

Trevor's jaw fell.

She brought the set to the counter with Trevor following.

Trevor kept stealing glances at the little black bag containing the sexy lingerie, as they walked through the mall. Stacy dragged him everywhere, buying him new clothes, video games, and an upgrade for his phone. She'd been right. Retail therapy was working. Despite all the new stuff, though, he kept looking at the little bag, and imagining.

He felt like a pack mule as he hauled the numerous bags of merchandise to the car and hefted them into the back seat. Stacy, then, took him to dinner before they went home. At home, Stacy left Trevor to lug the bags up to his room, taking only the little black one. It was still early evening, and his parents were watching TV. He busied himself with putting away his clothes, and playing with the new phone as a distraction, but he was still preoccupied with his (possibly lesbian) girlfriend troubles.

Stacy knocked on his door and let herself in. He looked up from the phone, half-expecting to see her wearing the sexy lingerie set. She was not. She was dressed in shorts and a lacy blouse that he could see her bra though. She sat on the bed.

"I'm going to go out for a bit with Mary." She said, "Don't worry, ok? We'll figure this out."

"Thanks, Stac. I owe you one."

She ruffled his hair, which he was finding that he did not really hate as much as he once did.

"You bet your sweet ass, you do." She said.

Stacy left him alone with his thoughts, and left the house. Mary was waiting on the porch when she pulled up, looking sad. She got into the car.

"Hey, baby." Stacy said, leaning over to hug her.

"Hey, Stacy. Thanks for talking to me."

"It's what girls do." She said, pulling the car out of the drive. "Tough day, huh?"

Mary nodded and said, "I don't know what to do!"

"Why don't you start from the beginning."

As they drove, Mary related the conversation with Trevor, and tried her best to explain her feelings.

"Ever since you... we did... what we did, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. It was so beautiful." She said sadly. "I feel so awful, though. Why was it so easy with you, and it's so hard with Trevor?"

"Because you're a lesbian, baby." Stacy stated flatly.

"I... I am not!" Then she thought for a moment and asked, "Am I?"

Mary had never met any lesbians that she knew of. How did she know what lesbians were like? How did one know if they were a lesbian? Stacy had probably met lots of lesbians. She clearly liked girls, and Mary did know that there were lesbians in colleges.

"You check all the boxes." Stacy said, nodding.

She stopped the car in the parking lot of Tara's apartment. Mary looked up at the familiar building.

"Are we... going to do it again?" She asked.

"We're just going to talk about your problem with Trevor." Stacy said, shaking her head. "Tara's working nights again, so I thought it would be easiest to do it here. Is that ok?"

Mary nodded, and they walked up to the apartment together. Stacy flipped on the lights and turned on the radio, then handed Mary a wine cooler.

"You need to take the edge off." She said, twisting the cap on her own and flicking it into the trash.

Mary was quiet. She wasn't sure what to say. How did one discuss their potential lesbianism with their boyfriend's sister?

"What's a relationship, baby?" Stacy asked, toying with a lock of Mary's hair..

"What do you mean?"

"Just that. What is your typical relationship? The kind you see on TV or in the movies."

Mary thought about it. It was an easy question, but she suspected there was more to it.

She answered, "A boy and a girl. They fall in love, have sex, have a family, and argue about kids or money."

"That's the Hollywood relationship." Stacy said, nodding. "That's only what you're told a relationship is. That isn't what a relationship actually is."

"What is it?" Mary asked, curious.

"A relationship is whatever works for the people involved, in a way that satisfies their emotional, physical, spiritual, and sexual needs. All of us are different, and every one of us has different needs. One relationship isn't wrong because it's different from what Hollywood or TV says it is. I could have a relationship with a man, a woman, or even both at the same time, and as long as all of us were happy in that relationship--if it worked for us and made us happy--there would be nothing wrong with it. What did I tell you about your life the last time we were here?"

"That I was the only one that had to live my life." Mary answered.

Stacy nodded and said, "Your mother doesn't have to be happy with your life. Your church doesn't. Trevor doesn't, and neither does anyone else. There are a lot of people in 'real' relationships who are miserable and hate their life. My personal view is that you should live in a way that makes you happy, not in a way that other people tell you will make you happy."

Mary nodded slowly. That did make sense. How did it help her with her Trevor problem, though? How did it help her know if she was a lesbian?

"It's difficult, if not impossible, to find one person that can satisfy everything that we need. I need a lot of sex, for example, sometimes slow and sexy, other times hard and hot. I love sex with men, and I love sex with women. I won't ever find one person that can be a man and a woman whenever I need them to be. Right?"

Mary had to laugh at the image of biological impossibility, and she nodded.

"So, I choose to just be by myself, and pick partners that satisfy my sexual needs, whatever they might be from day-to-day. Hollywood would call that a slut, in case you're wondering. Whatever. I like it. It works for me. It makes me happy. I can satisfy my own emotional and physical needs. I don't need anyone else for that."

"That makes sense." Mary admitted. Stacy was so confident and brave, she thought, to live like that. "I still don't know what to do, though."

Stacy nodded and said, "You're different. You have different needs. Start with physical. You need clothes, shelter, food. Those are things you need to stay alive. Right now, you depend on other people for those things. Your parents, Trevor, your church. It won't always be that way. You'll get older and you'll rely more on yourself for those things."

Mary agreed.

"You have emotional needs." Stacy continued. "You want to be loved, accepted, encouraged. We all do. Some of us look inside for those things, and others get them from the people around us. You get them from the same sources as your physical needs, and that will never change. It's who you are, and it's perfectly fine. Does it make you happy?"

"Yes. I love that Trevor accepts me, and that he always encourages me, or that he doesn't ever judge me for being who I am."

Stacy nodded agreement and went on, "Sexual needs are some of the most complex, though. That's especially true when you don't have a lot of experience, and you don't really understand what you need or want. How do you feel when boys touch you?"

"Scared." Mary admitted, hanging her head. "Like I want to throw up."

Stacy nodded, then added, "And girls?"

She laid her hand on Mary's bare leg to emphasize the point. Mary blushed and answered, "Excited."

"Now, imagine that you're Trevor." Stacy said. "Imagine that you have some beefy, muscled stud with a big hard dick, and he's plunging his tongue into your mouth. All he wants to do is rip off your clothes and push that thick dick into you, then pound it into your body until he cums. How does that make you feel?"

Mary could easily imagine how it felt. "Scared." She repeated. "Like I want to throw up."

Stacy nodded and said, "And when you have a soft girl kissing you, running her sexy hands over your body. She's warm and sensual. How does that make you feel?"

Stacy caressed her leg gently.

"Excited."

"You love Trevor. You love the wonderful person that he is, and you can't imagine not having him in your life, right?"

She nodded. It was true. Trevor did tick all of her boxes, except the sexual one.

"Trevor loves you the same way. You satisfy all of his needs, except for one."

Mary nodded again, while Stacy continued to slide her hand up her leg, toying with the hem of her skirt.

"There are other relationships like that." Stacy said. "There are boyfriends, and husbands, who don't satisfy the woman in their life sexually, but in every other way, they're perfect. They love their partner, and they even enjoy seeing them being sexually satisfied by other people."

Mary's eyes widened. There were actually men like that?

"You mean they let their wives have sex with other men, and they're ok with it?"

Stacy nodded, inwardly rolling her eyes at just how sheltered the girl was, but she continued, "Not just men, though. There's women like that, too. Just because it isn't what TV says is right, doesn't mean that it's wrong. Do you think it's wrong?"

Mary thought about it. By Stacy's logic, which made sense, if the people involved were all having their needs satisfied, and they were happy with it, then what was the real harm?

She shook her head and said, "I guess not. If they're all happy."

"So, if you can't satisfy Trevor's sexual needs," Stacy went on, "then he will either need to be ok with that and happy, or someone else will need to satisfy them."

Mary thought about this, too. She did want Trevor to be happy. She did not want to lose Trevor. She could not satisfy that need. Trevor, she knew, would not be happy in a relationship in which he did not get sex with a woman. He was patient, but he wasn't going to have a happy life without sex. Someone else would have to give Trevor sex. Could she be happy if someone else had sex with her boyfriend? She had no idea. The thought had never occurred to her.

Stacy could see the conflict on Mary's face as she struggled with the questions she'd put into her head.

"That's... " Mary started, stopped, continued, "I don't know how to even talk about that."

"That's what experimentation is for." Stacy said, grinning. "The thing about learning what you do and don't like is that you never actually know what you like until you try it."

"So, I should let Trevor have sex with another girl?"

Stacy shook her head and said, "No. Not just that. You have to be involved. It's a relationship. If Trevor does it with another girl, and you aren't there, then it's just him cheating on you. He'd never do that. You know that. He's too good. You would need to be there, and encourage him. Tell him it's ok, and that it's what you want for him. Show him that you love him so much that you're willing to give him what he needs, but that you're part of the relationship, and that it's something that you're sharing together. If you don't, then it's just having two relationships at the same time. One will eventually take precedence over the other, and considering how much men like sex, which one do you think would ultimately win out?"

That was true, Mary knew, and it opened up a whole new box of terror in her. She couldn't be happy if Trevor was just having sex with another girl when he needed it. Eventually, the unnamed fantasy girl would just steal him away, and it would be horrible.

"Relationships are so hard." Mary whined, putting her head in her hands. "How do I do it? I don't know any girls like that! And, even if I did, how do you ask someone to have sex with your boyfriend?"

"It would have to be someone you trust, too. Someone you both trust, that understands what being in that kind of relationship is all about, and who won't try to break you up. She also has to be willing to take care of your needs, right? This isn't all about Trevor and his penis. It's about both of you."