All Comments on 'Tennis Camp Ch. 01'

by Strawberry_2051

Sort by:
  • 8 Comments
Marklynda2Marklynda2over 1 year ago

Knocking on Heaven's door, slow and gentle is good but.... A great start to what promises to be a great story. Good build up and characters. I applaud and appreciate your and your Muse's imagination and abilities to bring it to your story. Thank you for sharing your vision and talents.

Strawberry_2051Strawberry_2051over 18 years agoAuthor
Don't give up!

OK, I couldn't help it and I voted for myself.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
Good start

Hot. Could have used more dialog. You also have a tendency to cut sentences in half with unnecessary commas. But I hope to see more.

Gus AsparGus Asparalmost 19 years ago
oh, very nice!

This guy is obviously going to cum any moment, and he's got the woman he's already fucking and two 18-year-old girls in front of him. Wow, what a cum-bath we're in for...

gdavisgdavisalmost 19 years ago
Great beginning

A great start. I like how the action is drawn out, there's a bit of suspense to it. The writing is also fantastic, except for its a little to medical. The way she describes her orgasm sounds like a doctor diagnoising a disease. But that is a small quibble.

don87654don87654almost 19 years ago
The shits! What a letdown!

Gross! What a teaser! You had plenty of time to fuck and ejaculate. What you wrote was pure teasing.

VioletteViolettealmost 19 years ago
Missed it by THAT much...!

VERY hot story! Can't wait for Chapter 2!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 19 years ago
aww...

poor guy!

Anonymous
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Anonymous