The 22 Year Old College Virgin (fm)

Jake and I moved through the loud club with a DJ EDM performer on stage

(Sugar Free Red Bull and Vodka tastes like how EDM sounds. They are perfect companions for one another).

Jake introduced me to a really cool hipster guy named Kale. He had tattooed.going up and down his arms. He looked like a blonde Adam Levine. We had the same glasses on, big, chunky, square clear frames.

"This is my friend Cat," Jake introduced me, "she, like you, is single by the way."

"Hello Cat," Kale shook my hand, "I really like your glasses."

"Thanks, I like yours as well." I said with a smile.

"They look way better on you."

"Thanks," I said.

Jake, an expert wingman, picked up on the growing tension at once:

"Hey Kale, I am going to go order a couple of drinks, can you keep an eye on Cat for me?"

"Sure thing Jake!"

And again, Jake disappeared in the crowd of people.

Kale and I moved to the outer edge of the dance floor so that we could talk and hear one another better. We had to stand really close to one another to be able to hear each other.

Cool Kale and I talked for a while. Kale quickly found out that I was an avid reader and we went into a deep conversation about our favorite books and authors. Kale was way into Fantasy books, like Sanderson, Rothfuss, and Tolkein. It is always good to meet another avid reader out in the land of the living.

We stood nose to nose and talked. Kale was like the cool male version of me: same glasses, same taste in books; same mousy features. Kale was just much cooler.

Jake swung by and gave me another Red Bull and Tito's, which I quickly downed for courage, and Jake disappeared back in the crowd.

Kale was going on and on about how good The Name of The Wind by Ruthfuss is, and I agreed with him. He was preaching to the choir. I interrupted Kale's long soliloquy on the book.

"Hey Kale, we should make out now?"

"Sure!" Kale said with a big smile.

Kale pulled my cheek to his and we began to kiss.

We kissed awkwardly, both of our big glasses frames got in the way, but neither of us took them off.

I tasted the fruitiness of the Red Bull on my lips against the minty, gum, flavor of his mouth.

Our kisses escalated and now my slutty tongue raped Kale's mouth. We stood close together and pressed our bodies into one another. My chest chafed against his; our pelvis' pressed into one another.

I could feel Kale erect, through his pants, against my pelvis.

I broke the kiss. I now somehow had Kale's minty gum in my mouth. Without saying anything, I grabbed Kale's tattooed hand and I led Kale to one of the single unisex bathrooms of the club.

Kale and I immediately kissed upon the locking of the bathroom door.

I pulled Kale's tattooed hand to my braless tits and began to fondle him through his jeans.

I unbuttoned Kale as he reached his hand inside my dress.

I gave Kale his gum back with my tongue, got down on my knees, and began to give horny hipster bookworm Kale a blowjob

I licked and sucked Kale, incorporating all the things Jake taught me. I made sure his penis was wet; I kept my teeth away from his skin; I salivated and spit on him; and I choked myself with him, tickling the back of my throat, lightly gagging.

I touched myself under my dress, through my panties, as I sucked off this random tattooed stranger. And in a random bar/club bathroom!-- I felt like such a stupid slut.

Kale caressed my cheek as I took him with my mouth. Or rather, as he took my mouth with his cock. Kale moaned all the while.

"Fuck this is so crazy Cat, oh my god, you feel so good."

I gagged in reply.

:"Fuck," Kale moaned out.

I let spit dribble down my face, letting the blowjob be messy-- I just fingered and enjoyed myself.

"Fuck, that feels so good," Kale repeated, "you are so sexy by the way."

Kale's encouragement made me work harder. I did my duty as a good bar slut to make this tattooed hipster feel good.

"Shit, fuck," Kale pulled himself from my begging mouth, "sorry, I don't want to cum yet."

Kale lightly touched my chin and guided me to a standing position. Kale gave me a big kiss.

"Do you want to come over?"

"Yes," I said, and gave him another big kiss.

32

Kale lived in a cool apartment complex downtown within walking distance of the club.

We said goodbye to Jake as we left. He was deep in conversation with two asian girls in the far corner of the club.

"Alright kids, be careful, I'll see you later," Jake said with a laugh and went back to talking to his oriental girlfriends.

Kale and I walked back to his apartment, Kale's arm around me. We fondled each other, and occasionally kissed, as we drunkenly stumbled back to Kale's.

We arrived at Kale's apartment. It had an awesome view of the skyrise of the downtown area.

Kale led me to his bedroom. He had a great big bookcase on one of the walls of the room. I got so excited I immediately ran over to it and inspected Kale's collection. Kale had hardcover copies of all the fantasy books we had talked about earlier at the club. But he also had 10 to 15 Grisham novels. I couldn't help but laugh at his top shelf of just Grisham.

"Fine, now you know my dirty secret, I really love Grisham."

"Oh my God, you're my Dad," I said with a laugh.

Kale came over and kissed me and led me over to his bed.

Kale pushed me down on the bed and climbed on top of me as we resumed our kissing.

I was crazy drunk and crazy horny from blowing Kale at the club. Kale dry humped into me as we kissed.

I broke the spell for a moment.

"Is it cool if we turn on your tv for background noise?"

"Sure, what do you want in the background?"

"This might sound weird, but I really like Fullmetal Alchemist."

"No way, me too, I love that show!"

(Kale really was the much cooler alternate universe version of me).

Kale quickly pulled up the show, and we resumed our kissing and dry humping to the sound of action packed Japanese dialogue.

Kale was still on top, so I rolled him over and straddled his skinny jean hips.

"Take your shirt off," I commanded, now on top.

Kale obeyed, revealing his inked upped sleeved arms. Fuck, he was so sexy.

Kale unbuttoned his pants and slid them down. I removed myself from his pelvis so he could take his pants off completely. Kale also had tattoos going down his left leg. His right leg was bare.

I re-stradled Kale, my tattooed bookworm, and we kissed.

I found Kale through his briefs and fondled him as we kissed. Kale copied me and touched me through my panties.

"Fuck, I'm so horny," I moaned into Kale.

I slid my panties to the side and Kale slid his briefs down around his thighs.

I guided myself onto Kale. I pulled one of Kale's hands to my neck as he slid into me.

"Fuck, yes daddy, choke me" I whispered.

Fuck, you feel so good."

Kale choked me as he slid all the way inside.

Kale's hand moved down and revealed my tiny tits from my dress. He alternated between squeezing my nipples and choking me as we fucked.

For Kale, I was a mess of wetness, drunkenness, and horniness. Like the good slut I was now, I rode Kale as he fondled me.

"Yes, daddy, I'm so horny, fuck, yes, yes, yes," I moaned in rhythm as Kale fucked me. "Yes, please daddy, yes."

Kale quickly climaxed in less than five minutes of fucking. I didn't mind, rather, I thought it was cute that he came so quickly. And the short lived sex that we did have was pretty awesome!

Like a good slut, I put my lips around Kale as pulsed in my mouth. He came so much I couldn't help but to spill and slobber down his shaft.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Kale whispered as his legs spasmed.

I swallowed what I could and licked Kale clean. Kale guided me up to his mouth and we resumed making out.

Fullmetal Alchemist still on in the background.

33

I slept over at Kale's and we fucked again in the morning. Kale orgasmed even quicker this time. This time it was kind of a bummer. I really wanted Kale to fuck me down.

I Ubered home from Kale's apartment. Kale let me borrow his copy of The Firm by Grisham to read.

I arrived home and went straight back to bed. I wasn't that hungover from last night. I was more so just tired from being up all night with Kale.

At around 2 pm Jake called me and woke me up, wondering if I was down to go to Panera again. I quickly rinsed off in the shower, and put on a t-shirt and yoga pants.

34

Jake and I arrived at Panera and ordered the standard hangover fare: a bread bowl and black coffee.

I recounted my night with Kale to Jake, leaving out the part where he orgasmed super quickly. "What about you? Did it work out with those asian girls you were talking to?"

"My, oh, my, did it ever!" Jake exclaimed with a smile, "they were Philipino by the way, but that doesn't matter. My God, you won't believe last night Cat!"

I couldn't help but smile at Jake's childlike enthusiasm.

"So I went home with one of those asian girls last night, the taller one, Lola was her name by the way. It turns out that the girls were roommates so all three of us Ubered home together. The three of us sat together in the back of the car, and Lola and I were basically making out while the other girl was sitting there watching us."

I ate my soup as Jake told his tall tale.

"So we arrived back at their apartment. Lola and I went straight to her room. We were naked, making out on her bed, when the other, shorter asian girl, snuck in the room. Without saying anything she climbed onto the bed with us."

"Oh my God, no way," I said, in between bites of soup.

"So you see where this story is going. Lola helped her shorter roommate-- Yuki by the way-- take her shirt and shorts off. So now there were three of us naked in Lola's bed."

"That's crazy, have you ever had a three-way before?" I asked.

"I have, and they are not as good as you think they would be. Three ways are actually kinda overrated in my opinion. Like, there is so much going on; you don't know what to do with your hands; I'm worried that I'll focus too much on one girl and leave the other out; where should I cum; what if I fuck one girl and not the other; who do I kiss-- it's really stressful."

I couldn't help but to laugh at Jake's plight: Jake the three-way Sisyphus.

Jake went on through my giggles.

"So, the three of us were having really awkward three-way sex, when, out of nowhere, I figured it out! The key to a three way, as the guy at least, is to let the two girls make love together, and just be the tool the girls work through in the act of making love-- like a human dildo."

I spat my soup all over the table and practically shat myself with laughter as Jake went on about how to have a good three-way in this quiet Panera.

"I'm not joking, like, one of the girls is using me to fuck the other while she makes love to her-- just get your dick in and get out of the way."--