The C&s Club Pt. 02

"You're right, on both accounts; I need to hold my cum for tonight — and we need to make you feel good about laying open for my cock. Come on, let's go back to bed."

Back in our bedroom, I go to our bed and sit down on the edge wondering how Aaron will make me truly see and believe that I am the bottom submissive I think I am. What role does my inner feminine part play — or is that all just inexperience and fantasy? It feels so right to be doing these things we're doing, it's just so new to really be here actually doing such kinky stuff. It's kinky to me at any rate ... but I've never had a better time in my life. Maybe it's the blurred line between just being a gay man and sometimes having these feminine feelings mixed in on top of it all? It's so easy to think of him as the man — and to think of myself as ... as something smaller ... a follower?

"I'll be right back Babe, just need to pee real quick."

On an impulse I jump up, "Wait. I've been wanting to try something." I hurry over to where he is standing.

"What's on your mind now?"

"Well, this may be weird, but do you ever think about pee play stuff? I've been thinking it would be really erotic if you peed on my dick — I saw it on porn quite awhile ago. The Top man told his sub that he was going to mark him as his bitch. It's kinda embarrassing, but the idea makes me feel really submissive and I was just wondering if the real thing would be like that."

"I've seen some porn about things like that. I know enough about it to realize a lot of people do play those games. I think it could have a very strong Top and bottom dynamic. So, what the heck —let's get in the shower and you can lay down under me."

He leads me by the hand back to the shower. Since I'm already naked, it takes but a moment to obey. The shower tiles are cold against my skin and my dick doesn't know whether to shrink at the cold or get hard at what we're about to do. I look up and Aaron has never looked more manly. He straddles my outstretched legs and takes his cock into his hand. Now my cock really wakes up and gets harder with each passing second.

"Ask for it — beg me to piss on your dick."

"I did ask for it — I'm laying under you and I want you to mark me as yours — please piss on me Aaron. By laying here under you, I'm accepting that you're the man here — you're the Cock and I'm your cocksucker." I feel the wave of humiliation wash over me and the arousal is like a potent drug. His words come back to me; 'A sweet humiliation.' My mind is too fogged to understand how or why the contradiction makes sense, but I accept that it does make sense because I feel it. As my brain tries to figure out why it's so arousing, the warmth of his wet flow on my sex steals away everything except the experience of what I feel both on my body and inside my head. The mantra; Sweet Humiliation plays over and over for as long as his warm stream washes back and forth over my sex and up to my nipples as I lay under his dominance. As he moves his flow back down my body, I open my eyes to find his — I look down at his cock and watch his stream arc in a show of dominance over my cock — my legs spread wider of their own will and I thrill in this wonderful surrender — this wonderful feeling of his warmth bathing my dick and balls and running down my crack and over my opening. My eyes close and relax in this acceptance of my place under him — of this moment of marking me as his. Deep inside of myself I know I have taken a huge step in better knowing myself. I feel the mixture of shame and the thrill of acceptance as I lay in willing submission under my man.

When the flow stops, I sit up just in time to stop him from shaking his cock. I urge his hand away and he cedes control of his tool to me. I have to get on my knees to do what I need to do — when I get in position I take him into my mouth and begin to service him. His cock muscles clench and release several times — I suck him until he is fully erect and continue for awhile longer. In my head I am indeed his bottom sub — his cocksucker, and his bottom boi! The elation inside is like a soaring flight of freedom and joy. It's his words that finally break through to my sodden brain — a brain over filled with emotions too ethereal to express — a brain that has capitulated in acceptance of my submission to this man. Finally, his words break through the depth of the place I've journeyed to.

"That's enough Babe, get up and let's rinse off."

He takes the cock away from me and I look up to his face.

"Come on, let me help you up and we can rinse off."

He lifts under my arms and I get my feet under me. The first thing he does is hug me tight to his warm body. I want to say thank you, but speaking seems too much work. Instead, I lay my head on his chest as he holds me.

"Sit on the bench Babe, I'll turn on the water."

I do as he says, and lean my head against his hip as he messes with the shower controls. I feel myself waking up — or coming back — from wherever my mind retreated to. Aaron turns the spray onto me and my revival back to normalcy picks up more steam. Still, I play through my submission some more and settle on amazement as the defining experience in this little game we played. In more focus, I'm amazed at the power of my reaction. Perhaps 'game' is the wrong word — it is more like a commitment and a forging of bonds — a settling of roles and the places we each belong. It ran so much deeper than just what was happening on the surface — it tore into the self assigned definitions that are at the core of my understanding of myself. I touched the act of submission to another man and ... it leaves me as a new and different person.

"Shannon, you okay?"

His words pull me back from my thoughts and I look up to him again.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good. That was pretty heavy, but really interesting too."

"Can you tell me about it?"

I do my best and basically just repeat that it was a really deep experience of being submissive to another man. I know I can never fully explain or describe the thoughts and emotions I felt — I also know I am changed deep in my core and will never forget this experience. Finally I remember that we came into the house so Aaron could give me a taste of having a man take my butt for his pleasure. "Weren't we going to find some way to help me learn to accept being a bottom?"

"I think that was the plan, you still up for it?"

"I'm more up for it now than ever. Something changed Aaron, something woke up just now in the shower. I know it sounds crazy, but it's like part of me that was asleep is now awake — and that part plays a big role in me really truly embracing submission to you. I can't explain it or I would."

"I don't claim to understand Babe, but I believe and trust that what you've said is true. Are you sure you're still up for some butt play?"

"I am. I'm coming back down from wherever I've been. I'm even more ready to surrender my whole body to you now."

Aaron reaches out his hand for me to take, and I do. When I stand he uses the shower wand to rinse my whole body again and then we're done. My man dries me from head to toes, then quickly dries himself. He takes my hand again and I know it's time — time for me to begin the opening of my body for him. He grabs some dry towels as we leave to go back to our bedroom.

Aaron strips off the top sheet and blankets onto the floor at the foot of the bed and spreads some towels on the bed. When he is done, he waves his hand for me to lie down.

He lays close next to me and gently rubs my back. "You wanna hear a secret?"

My slight nod answers him.

"Bottoms get a special gift from their men. You know what that is?"

"We get their cock?"

"Yes that, but something more — you get to have you butt-pussy kissed and licked. Have you ever had that done to you?"

"No. I've never done any of this we've been doing."

"I think you're in for a pleasant surprise. Get up on your knees and lay your face on the bed."

I do as he says and feel the bed shift as he stands up.

"This is your time Babe, just close your eyes and let me pleasure you."

I do as he says, then feel his hands on my legs prompting me wider. I open as instructed and can feel my butt cheeks opening further — he's using both hands to push my butt open until I feel my hole opening. When his tongue touches me there it clinches and tries to close, but I am spread too wide. My eyes close in the pleasure of this new feeling. When he licks my crack from my balls up to my lower back, I almost buckle onto the bed the pleasure is so intense! Again and again he licks me with his tongue pressed flat against this most sensitive flesh. He keeps bathing me with his tongue until I hear my own moans — or are they groins of pleasure? This is his special gift to me and I understand. It's an image of a man pleasuring his wife or his woman — or his cocksucker bottom — in tender care and affection ... yes, he's definitely pleasuring his cocksucker ... his bottom boi. I relax in my acceptance of my role in all of this as he continues licking me. In my mind's eye I watch myself being prepped for breeding until I feel his hand cup my sex and begin to roll and fondle me to the point I fear an orgasm! "Stop, Aaron — I don't want to come yet ... please stop."

He sort of stops. At least he gives my hole a respite and I feel the bed take his weight as he kneels between my spread legs. I assume that this is the moment when I get bred for the first time. But he leans over me and kisses my back, and a warm arm wraps to encircle my waist. He lays his weight onto me until I am pressed back down to the bed. We lay there in silence — except for the pounding of my pulse in my head and our heavy breaths. I don't know how long we lay there, my mind is drifting — living in the pleasure of the moment as his weight presses on me and his lips press kisses on my bare skin — and then he's going down on me again, revisiting the pleasure I was just given — a gift unlike any I have ever received ...

But it's not over. Again the bed shifts when he stands up. Before I can look, he holds my ankles tight and drags me back off the of the bed until I'm on my stomach, my sex is at the very edge of the bed and my legs are spread and stretched out straight so my toes are all that touches the floor. I don't struggle, and I can't see what he's doing. But as soon as his mouth touches me again I paint my own picture of him in my mind as he kneels on the floor between my legs — and licks my hole again. What do I call it now — butthole no longer sounds right — but pussy seems too much? But now his tongue can also reach to bathe my balls and when his hand slides under me, I lift my hips up so he can pull my dick down and cover it with his kisses until he starts sucking on it! I get my feet on the floor enough to lift my hips higher so he has better access for his licks of pleasure that now travel an even longer journey from cock ... to balls ... to quivering hole ... and all the way up onto the middle of my back again and again, and again his tongue makes the journey. I feel myself sinking into this bliss of being taken by him, taken for his pleasure and getting so much pleasure from that taking. Whatever doubts I ever had about going on this journey, whatever wishes I ever held to just be a normal guy, whatever questions I ever had about how to walk this path — they are all washed away by the love lavished on me by Aaron in this moment.

Shannon lays in passive surrender under me — his body and his moans of pleasure assure me that his shift of understanding has come. I reach for the small plastic vibrator I bought on a whim — a dab of coconut butter to coat the toy with and another dab into his butt. His hole clenches when I push the butter in. I take my time, around and around I tease until I gently push in — very quickly I feel his next surrender. The toy is no bigger than my thumb, and perfect for this moment. There hasn't been a word said since we started, I leave it that way and press the toy into his body and turn on the vibrator — his body makes a small jerk, then relaxes onto the bed again. I slowly begin to massage the inside of his hole — back and forth with a kiss on his soft bottom thrown in for free. Slowly back and forth and a nuzzle and lick on his balls hanging free and accessible. It's all more wonderful and special than I could have ever dreamed — the word delicate comes to my mind when I look at him laying passive under my touch. As he falls under the spell of this new sexual awakening, I feel myself falling on a deeper plain — as much as I've been taken with Shannon before ... the words beautiful and love keep surfacing in my thoughts unbidden. The man who had no interest in commitment has suddenly been swept up in a current much deeper and much stronger than any I've ever known.

Without taking the vibrator out, I stand up and roll him onto his back. Shannon lifts and spreads his legs and together we get him more fully on the bed. I had a plan, but first I have to tease his nipples with my tongue. I'm so close to his face now, and I stretch a little farther to kiss his lips. I feel his arms wrap over my back and he holds me tight. I put a hand under his back and easily lift his weight and body up enough to get a little more bed under us. I check to see that the small buzzing cock is still in him and lay some of my weight onto him. He quickly starts humping up to me as if we were having intercourse. I know the bullet vibrator is just like a cock to him, so I begin to match his thrusts and we 'pretend-fuck' for a short while until he can go no farther — it's just a long quiet moan from him and I feel the warmth of his orgasm spread over our lower stomachs. In the bliss I know he's in, I hold him and nuzzle kisses on his neck as he rides the wave to it's crest and back down into that relief that all humans crave and need.

I don't try to keep track of the time — we just lay there together until I feel him stir under me. I push myself up enough to look into his eyes. He smiles and I smile back, then lean down to kiss his lips. I whisper in his ear, "Was that what you needed to experience to know this is real?"

"I think so. I love you, I really do."

"I love you too Babe. You're a very unexpected arrival into my life — a very wonderful arrival." I lean closer that we can kiss again, this time longer and it feels so very natural — it seems I've known him forever, not the short time I know is true. But, I should probably take my weight off and I roll over onto the bed beside him.

Shannon surprises me when he sits and turns to lay his head on my stomach. I assume he needs me to cuddle him, but before I can he slides down and takes my cock into his mouth. As he starts to blow me, I relax into the bed knowing he probably wants to do it and probably thinks I should come too. I'm not of a mind to deny either of us that pleasure. It shouldn't take long after this day's events.

As I suck him, I casually wonder how he can hold off from coming during what we just did. I wanted to come the moment he put the vibrator in me and I can smell and feel my own mess from my orgasm. His stomach is hard and muscular — and now wet and slick with my cum. Now I want him to come in my mouth. I do everything I know to do and try to be like the cocksuckers I've seen on porn. His cock is so perfect, I would envy him but my cock seems to better match the way I feel inside — smaller fits this body and the person I've discovered inside — this person who has finally been set free to be small. But I love sucking his and I try to do my best. I take him all the way to my gag point and then pull back to suck the fat cock-head for awhile — then back down to try again — over and over as I hold the base of the hard flesh tight in my hand. I feel him respond with a push into my mouth and I try harder to take more of him. When his hand grabs a handfull of my hair, I let him take over and let my mouth be just a warm wet hole for his pleasure. I don't know if I'll ever be able to take all of it, but I try until slobber runs freely out of the corners of my mouth. The slobber makes more of a slick mess on my face and his stomach but it also makes his cock slide in and out easier. I promise myself to master taking all of him, and gag again as he pushes a little deeper. I know when it's time — I feel him get even harder and fatter and his hand grips my hair tighter. When he tenses up I will myself to accept it ... accept it all!

Burst after burst fills my mouth to overflowing — I swallow as much as I can and feel the rest flow out of the small open places where his cock stretches my mouth open. I finally just surrender and go limp to let him fuck my mouth until he's satisfied...it's easier for us both this way. Eventually he relaxes and I lay my face in the puddle of combined spunk and saliva on his stomach. We lay quiet — his cock resting in my mouth. I suckle him softly, knowing he's probably very sensitive at this moment. The smell of our semen is strong in the matted hair on his stomach and on my face. I'd like to tell myself I'm doing this for him — I know the truth is that it's as much for my desires as it is to pleasure him. With his cock in my mouth and the taste of his cum on my tongue, I reconnect to that space I have discovered — that space where 'Sweet Humiliation and Sweet Surrender' resides and rules — this place where I can be small and secure. Laying here in the mess of our lovemaking, I can look back down the trail of my life — all of the doubts and missteps, all of the disappointments — I can see none of that matters. I belong here in this unexpected place and with this unexpected man. I belong. I have a place to belong. Aaron's words finally signal the closing of this moment ...

"Now we have to take another shower. And according to you, I wasn't supposed to come so I could save my load for the show tonight."

I sit up and look down on the mess we've made. "Oops."

"You're gonna think oops when you have to suck me for an hour to make me come. Won't be much of a show if I don't come for the audience."

"What if we postpone my initiation? I'm so satisfied right now, all I want to do is shower with you and lay around and cuddle."

"That's not a bad idea. Going to the club was never supposed to be the only reason for coming back home for a break. Let's just rest up before we have to go back up north and finish the job. We have the rest of today, and all day tomorrow, and all day Monday."

"Sounds good to me. But, you owe me my night at the club. We have all those sexy clothes, I want to wear them somewhere to make you proud."

"How about this, we could lay around here and relax — after we get cleaned up and change the bedding. If we feel like it, we can drive out to the club and just mingle. No getting on stage tonight, but you can see what it's all about?"

"I kinda like the sound of that better. It gives me a chance to check out the terrain. Let's see how we feel later, but if we feel like going out, that would be the logical place to go."

"It's a deal. Come on, we gotta clean up the mess you made."

"The mess I made? Most of this isn't my cum, and you know it."

"Okay, we made a mess. We'll clean it up together."

We get off the bed and first thing, Aaron strips all the bedding off and carries it to the laundry room. Not being totally familiar with his house, I just sort of follow along. As I walk behind him down the hall, I admire his body openly and take in the details of his backside now that I've got the chance in such an open way. I decide that I want to lick his butt like he did mine — I don't know if he'll let me, but I want to experience that and give him the pleasure he gave me. At the laundry room he shows me where everything is kept and how the machines work. Hopefully, I'll be able to take over this chore at some point. That makes me wonder if I'll ever live here with him. I haven't thought about anything beyond today. I feel a small flutter of doubt try to surface, but push it away and get busy on the laundry.